Assalamu Alaikum brother,

I am sorry to hear about your bad experience when dealing with muslim families. While it is true that many families have this descrimnatory attitude, there are still families who are quite open to the idea of interracial marriages.

Whilst I do not necessarily agree with it, I urge you brother to try and understand where they are coming from. Parents always want the best for their children and in particular their daughters. They want to make sure they place them in safe hands and that they do not need to worry about their future

Maintaining a successful marriage is hard enough between people who belong to the same culture and are from the same country. This does in no way mean that you can not make a inter-culural succeed. It really depends on the parties involved.

Now I think the underlying reason for why arabs for example refuse to give their daughters in marriage to new converts may not because they are racists but because they think arab husbands are a safer option. My mother did object to me marrying new converts because she thought they are new to the faith, and that a few years down the line they may leave Islam. What will happen then, especially if children are involved?

Also, the muslim man being the leader of the family should have the necessary islamic knowledge to lead. When the wife is the only source of knowledge, that would definitely create issues. Sometimes the new convert simply reverts to his old life, where does that leave his muslim wife and children?

There is also the issue of language barrier. A marriage does not only concern the couple, it is meant to bring the two families together, so this is something else to consider.

I am not at all objecting to this type of marriage, I am only being realistic and certainly it is not all black and white.

Wassalam