Quote:
|
Do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting dead?
|
because it's easier to hope than look for new batteries
Quote:
|
Why do banks charge a fee on 'insuficient funds' when they know there is not enough money?
|
cuz they know there's more to come
Quote:
|
Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
|
becuz we can't count stars but can check if paint is wet
Quote:
|
Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?
|
because they aren't made for each other
Quote:
|
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard ?
|
cuz he doesnt swing either way
Quote:
|
Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?
|
in case it
revolves and hits the back of his head
Quote:
|
Whose idea was it to put an 'S' in the word 'Lisp'?
|
dunno, but the S was for stutter through the lips lol
Quote:
|
If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?
|
they didn't, Darwin was just monkeying around
Quote:
|
Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?
|
because they're
light Quote:
|
Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?
|
they're on sale everyday - how else would they be sold :P
(ok I know wat you really meant) Quote:
|
Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?
|
because they thought they missed something the first time
Quote:
|
Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?
|
hahaha to prove your love with the vaccum cleaner is 'no-strings-attached'
Quote:
|
Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?
|
to prove plastic is not fantastic
Quote:
|
How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?
|
they don't, they die after crawling in through the gaps
Quote:
|
Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?
|
because we're clowns
Quote:
|
In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?
|
emmm what an un
cool question
Quote:
|
How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?
|
cuz there's a chance they'll become out-laws
Quote:
and finally...
The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is suffering from so me sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you! I've done my job and sent this message to you, now it's up to you to send it on.
|
I'm not mad enough to pass this on lol