I think the ayah is this?
"Or think you that you will enter Paradise without such (trials) as came to those who passed away before you? They were afflicted with severe poverty and ailments and were so shaken that even the Messenger and those who believed along with him said, "When (will come) the Help of Allâh?" Yes! Certainly, the Help of Allâh is near!" [Surah Baqarah: Ayah 214]

Hun, you are strong, and you are amazing. Stop denying things and making it seem like you're the worst person alive, cuz you simply ain't.

Don't give up on faith because of the mistakes of your parents. That's all I ask of you. I know things are tough. I know how you want to die. But I also know that Allah rewards us for the trials we face. You gotta stop focusing on only the fact that many things are haraam, because it makes Islam feel hard, especially when you're depressed and at the end of your rope. Music is known to be a difficult thing to give up, and given your circumstance, I don't really expect you to give it up overnight. Just the fact that your heart desires to try to give it up is good, and make dua that you will be to one day. Allah listens to all His servants who turns to Him...

You know, nothing in our lives is certain. You just need to have the hope that it will turn out. With hope you can be optimistic, and slowly as you grow up you can carve out the way you want your life to go. Do you really want to end your life now? Don't you have any dreams for your future and what type of mark you want to leave on the world? Don't tell me you're not capable of anything, cuz everybody has a gift...