I just wanted to say that you should put full trust in Allah swt becouse its him that will guide us to the right path. My husband was a born Muslim but didn't pray i started learning about Islam before he did and i made du'a that Allah would guide him and make things better for me the first thing i wanted was for my husband to cram his temper down he was a very angry person i wont say more than that and for him to become a practicing Muslim the next thing was i wanted a better relationship with my family and the last thing was i wanted children so much we had tried with no joy. Well Alhamdulillah i got all 3 things not right away it took time the more i made du'a to better my deen the more things improved. My husband was given a tape about the hell fire and this really made him think he started praying Alhamdulillah that was after 9 years of marriage then my family saw that i had become a much better person and my relationship with them is really great that was after 10 years and this year after 13 years of marriage and a miscarriage i got the final thing and my greatest joy Safiyyah houriya and Zakariya Abul-rahman were born on the 13th of august this year Alhamdulillah this is the power of du'a so dont give up trying to bring your husband to Islam have sabr and dont give up the more your deen grows and your love for it grows he will see this and inshaAllah with help from Allah he will choose Islam

Originally Posted by curious seeker

Thank you for answering my previous questions in another thread. I have another question for you, one of great weight to me.

I speak with a lot of words so for those with limited English, the important points are in Bold. Hope that helps.


---


Does Islam really demand me to divorce my husband if I convert?

My husband was raised christian but is an Agnostic in adult-hood. He really has no interest in religion. But he's very respectful of my own, and would do anything to help me foster it. He's said he would take me to whatever religious centers I wanted to attend, he wants to love and support me in my spiritual journey.

But he has no interest in religion himself, and I respect that as well. Our marriage works because it is based on respect, not just love alone.

He would never convert to Islam, especially not within 3 months of converting if I chose to do so. And I would never divorce him. Ever. He's an amazing man and the perfect man for me. We are perfect for each other.

I would honestly rather spend eternity in Hell than divorce my husband. In fact, I'd probably beg God to save my husband and let me burn, because I honestly think my husband is a better person than I am. I know it doesn't work this way, but I'm just making a point: I love my husband, and it's til death do us part, not "til religion do we part"

So I kind of think "Why bother converting?"

Why bother if you guys are just going to tell me I can't be with my husband anymore? He's not a "sacrifice" for God. He's my husband, and he always will be.


So is there really any point in me converting under these circumstances?

Surely there are 3 billion males on this earth, or around that. Just by random chance, you are very likely BOUND to come across another male who will be a perfect match for you. Just like how by pure chance, we MUST have intelligent life somewhere in the space.

Originally Posted by curious seeker

Thank you for answering my previous questions in another thread. I have another question for you, one of great weight to me.

I speak with a lot of words so for those with limited English, the important points are in Bold. Hope that helps.


---


Does Islam really demand me to divorce my husband if I convert?

My husband was raised christian but is an Agnostic in adult-hood. He really has no interest in religion. But he's very respectful of my own, and would do anything to help me foster it. He's said he would take me to whatever religious centers I wanted to attend, he wants to love and support me in my spiritual journey.

But he has no interest in religion himself, and I respect that as well. Our marriage works because it is based on respect, not just love alone.

He would never convert to Islam, especially not within 3 months of converting if I chose to do so. And I would never divorce him. Ever. He's an amazing man and the perfect man for me. We are perfect for each other.

I would honestly rather spend eternity in Hell than divorce my husband. In fact, I'd probably beg God to save my husband and let me burn, because I honestly think my husband is a better person than I am. I know it doesn't work this way, but I'm just making a point: I love my husband, and it's til death do us part, not "til religion do we part"

So I kind of think "Why bother converting?"

Why bother if you guys are just going to tell me I can't be with my husband anymore? He's not a "sacrifice" for God. He's my husband, and he always will be.


So is there really any point in me converting under these circumstances?

Check your Qu'ran and hadith, this question has been answered many times, Muslim men get to marry muslims, christians and jews, muslim women get to marry muslim men, nobody but nobody else.

""""I would honestly rather spend eternity in Hell than divorce my husband. In fact, I'd probably beg God to save my husband and let me burn, because I honestly think my husband is a better person than I am. I know it doesn't work this way, but I'm just making a point: I love my husband, and it's til death do us part, not "til religion do we part""""""


Aslaamu aalaykum..
well the question i would ask you, do you really fear Allah ?..i know understand your situation sis. but then the question of "Do you really fear Allah?" arises..as the Hellfire is not a place any man would like to enter..

Allaah Allmighty tells us about his punishments in Islaam for each wrong that we do, for example, a punishment for stealing or backbiting, Allah tells us of the punishments so that we may fear him and stay away from it. And Indeed Allah does forgive us as he is the most mercyful and most Kind. Allah indeed what is best for us..
Indeed do you not thank Allaah for what he provided/blessed you with? SubhanAllaah he has given us soo much, for we tells us he created us/Mankind. to worship him and thank him for the blessings he the Allmighy has bestowed us with:
{And I have not created Jinn and human beings except they should worship Me}, [Soorah adh-Dhaariyaat, Verse 56]
And Remember Allaah surely tests us in many ways:

Do men think that they will be left alone on saying 'We believe', and that they will not be tested? We did test those before them, and Allah will certainly know those who are true from those who are false. (29:2-3)

Be sure we shall test you with fear and hunger, some loss in goods or lives or the fruits (of your toil), but give glad tidings to those who patiently persevere. (2:155)

And on the question about whether you should or shouldnt divorce your husband because he is not a muslim.. i myself am not so knowledgable on the issue, i am sure other brothers and sisters may help you out on that..Inshaa`Allaah.

May Allaah The Allmighy the Exalted!
Forgive me if i have said anything to offend you. InshaAllaah i hope i helped you out in some part of the issue.
Wa alaaykum salaam

Originally Posted by Santoku

Check your Qu'ran and hadith, this question has been answered many times, Muslim men get to marry muslims, christians and jews, muslim women get to marry muslim men, nobody but nobody else.

i wouldn't marry someone outside my sect, let alone religion and im completely content with it

Originally Posted by *charisma*

Hi,

Before I begin, I want you to understand that Islam is a COMPLETE way of life. It doesn't just cover few aspects of a person's life, but rather every single aspect that makes it up down to the very last intricate detail.

Secondly, Islam has been here since Adam (pbuh) and finalized during the time of Muhammed (pbuh), and between that whole time difference including the time after the death of the Prophet Muhammed (pbuh) there have been MANY people who have been through the exact same thing you are going through, so even though this may be new to you, it's probably an ancient topic in Islam.

Lastly, there is NOTHING in this world or hereafter that compares to Allah or the religion of Islam. Allah is perfect and so is His religion. Those who choose to follow it, must do so with their absolute best efforts, and their most humble and purest intentions. It is not a religion to pick and choose which beliefs to follow. If you know this religion is the religion of Allah and was created perfectly, then there is no reason for you to reject Islam simply because you do not like something about it. We are the ones to adjust to the religion, not vice versa.



If you became a Muslim, and your husband remained a non-Muslim, this would annul the marriage contract. Thus, the divorce is necessary UNLESS he becomes a Muslim before the woman's iddah (waiting period) is over. Otherwise, any relations taken place while he's a non Muslim would be considered unlawful fornication.



Why don't you continue to discuss it with him? It would be better for the both of you if you had each other to support. You'd pray together, fast together, worship together, and you would feel much better at ease knowing you are both following the same faith. If he remains a nonMuslim and you decide to remain with him during your Islamic journey and your faith starts to increase, it may start to bother you that he's not a Muslim either.



You would be following your desires, not what you think is right. Allah knows what is in everyone's heart and He's most merciful. If He knows there is something you want but have to give it up to be a better Muslim and it's something that will cause you grief, then He will reward you with something a million times better, while still giving you the status of being a better Muslim. All you have to do is put your trust in Him and be patient.

You are not the only person who has had to contemplate these things before your decision to embrace Islam. And I know it's a very difficult decision to make if you love your husband and know he is perfect for you, but at the same time you have to know that there is a being higher than the both of you and He grants you more blessings in a millisecond than your husband has ever given you in his entire life. Allah should be first in your life, period.

Nothing is impossible...if you think that if you divorce your husband for the sake of Allah, and you will end up so miserable etc etc. then you have to reminds yourself that just as Allah has created your husband for you while you were a nonMuslim and you felt him to be perfect for you, then he may replace him with someone who is a Muslim who couldn't even compare with your first husband, or maybe he will open your husband chest towards islam and you can both work together to increase your faith!

Also, if you knew how painful Hell was, you would know that you would not even endure its heat, let alone hell itself, and you would disown his existence for it. If your husband is as you say, he would make an effort to accept Islam just as you have and learn more about it for your sake, so that he can support you 100%. If he knew that there's a divorce involved and that you are very passionate about this religion, then its not fair for him to say that he would NEVER embrace the religion. Even though he is helping you a little bit, eventually you're going to feel alone because what he's helping you with are just the basics..anyone could do that...in fact, you could do it alone. I know that if there is even an ounce of you that believes this religion is perfect, then it will never leave your heart, and you will inevitably feel uncomfortable with yourself continuing your normal way of life.



You're not converting for your husband. If you convert, its because YOU believe its the RIGHT religion, not because whether or not your husband can stay. Everything right begins with a huge sacrifice, and you can see it in examples of the past. People even sacrifice their lives...compared to that, your sacrifice isn't as major.

I only suggest that you continue to talk to your husband about the religion, pray that God opens his heart and eyes if you truly believe this religion is the one you want to follow for the rest of your life. Nothing in this world is eternal, so the wise thing to do is invest in things that are.

Peace

saalamu waliekum ,well said .i am a muslim could not even imagine how hell is coz it gives the qivers even thinking about it ,may Allah save us from the hell fire ,amen ,i would think of anyone who would choose hell over Allah swt,subhanAllah!