Originally Posted by HBot 5000

Azaif my comments on matrimonial threads such as this are to be taken rather lightly and no one should be offended by them...hehe..:okay:

I am the matrimonial expert and i boast a 100% success rate (in not getting you you're dream partner)

You know Alien women? man that would be so sweet! get a green woman from orion 5 :okay:

Right just because of you insolence i am reinstating my rules and going to give some more attributes one should look out for:

1. Someone who weighs no more than 10 stone. The slightest deviation will result in termination formely known as divorce.
2. When i get home from work she has my food, my bath, slippers & evening clothes ready.
3. Someone who does not go into private areas designated for males only - most likely going to be all of the house except the kitchen, bathroom and bedroom.
4. She must smell like sweet nectar all the time.
5. She must not invite any of her female friends round to talk to.
6. Someone who accepts one day off in every month to relax.
7. She must not go near my xbox 360.
8. She must not go near my high spec pc.
9. She must not go near my collection of dvd's especially the sci-fi. If she dares to defile them (especially my star trek & babylon 5 collection) she will be flogged and divorced quickly.
10. She must drive only to the shop and back.
11. When i am not with her she must await my return my thinking about me constantly.
12. She must cook the most wonderful sea food. If i ever get ill she will be divorced.
13. She must not want to have kids. My wife is for me to enjoy and no one else including ugly babies and ugly cats etc must have her affection.

more please ask....

Thats funny, you proberbly just have a good humor mashallah

Originally Posted by Noor

AsalamuAlaikum,


As a member who has been on this site for a long time, I'm disappointed beyond belief about the attitudes, mannerism, down right degrading replies I have been witnessing on this section of the forums.

If you don’t have respect for yourself, have respect for your fellow Muslim. Avoid posting unbeneficial comments. Remember you are Muslim always, not only when you enter a Masjid but on a secondly basis. Even behind the computer screen, one should always fear Allah swt.

Completely disgusted at your behaviour and your way of interacting with the opposite gender. You are not in the private sections. I wish not to lecture but to remind myself first and others of our ultimate goals.


Wa'ALaikumSalaam

Completly agree sister. mashallah

Asalamu aleikum

Originally Posted by HBot 5000

Also these are rather handy:

1) Someone who will cook different dishes for me everyday.
2) Someone who eventually will live with 3 other different nationaly sisters.
3) Someone who will dress real nice
4) Someone who will sleep on the sofa when she makes me angry
5) Someone who does not speak arabic, urdru, punjabi
6) Someone that will take care of herself by not putting on weight and become like an obese whale.
7) Someone who does not want kids.
8) Someone who likes having a 'kept' partner.
9) Somoeone who works.
10) Someone who does not have links with KSA, Pakistan, india, bangladesh especially Yemen
11) Someone who respects your private space.
12) Someone who loves sci-fi.

etc...hehe.

no wife should have to make her husband angry. marshallah and NO WAY should she have to sleep on the sofa dude!