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Default Re: Marry a muslim? heck no!!!! - 12-14-2007

I have no doubts about Islam or Allah being our creator, let me assure all of you. I guess I was to quick to rule out marriage to a muslim. I will rethink my choice, thanks to all your posts. I am still young and I do want my future wife to be with me in Jannah.
   
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Default Re: Marry a muslim? heck no!!!! - 12-14-2007

There are plenty of single american sisters out there, especially in the african american community. In fact, the recent rumblings in the muslim blogosphere is about how african american brothers are going over to morocco to marry, leaving all the sisters with no one.

Also, have you looked on any marriage sites? I know there are usually more brothers on there than sisters, but many of the brothers are oversees, and many american sisters won't marry anyone if it means sponsoring them for a green card. So, you would look a lot more appealing than a lot of the guys on there.
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Default Re: Marry a muslim? heck no!!!! - 12-14-2007



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I am still young and I do want my future wife to be with me in Jannah.
Then she has to be a Muslim.
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Default Re: Marry a muslim? heck no!!!! - 12-14-2007

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Originally Posted by Belief_is_Power View Post
Salam alaikum brothers and sisters

As many of you know I am a muslim convert. I have a good job, good place to live and good deen. However when it comes to marriage, I dont want to marry a muslim. yes thats right!! But why you ask? Because in the Ummah their is to much racism and you have to be a rich person to get married. Let me explain.......................... before you jump on my back.

I went to this brother and asked him that I was interested in his daughter. I had just graduated from college, had and still have a good job. however this brother said NO! I asked him why and he said that I was not arab and that I did not fit the qualtfications for his daughter. you have to make $100,000 a year he said, and that I was not Egyptian.

Well I thanked him and went off on my way. I tried about 9 other brothers and the answer was the same. No no no no no!!! you are not arab, pakistani, Indian etc, and you do not make $80,000 and up.So thats it I have had enough, forget marrying a muslim!!!!!! To much racism and high expictations. I make a good living to provide for a family, but because of my race I was denied by "so called muslims". And this is the view of the majority of muslims around the world unfortunatly.

I have decided to look for a Christian or a Jew to marry. It is not forbidden for me, and the intermarriage racism that once existed in the christian/jewish majority is now almost gone. not totally, but better then 40 years ago.

Todays muslims are more worried about preseving their racial blood or nationality, then letting a good muslim marry his/her daughter. This disgusts me, but it is the truth....... please post your views and anything else that you want to share.
Yup, Muslims are racist. Well, mostly immigrant parents. I'm desi, I married a caucasion revert - you probably want to check out a matrimonial site which will have many different varieties of sisters from North America who will be more amenable to marrying someone North American.

But, hey, if you want to go with a Christian or Jew, just remember the requirement - must be chaste ;)
   
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Default Re: Marry a muslim? heck no!!!! - 12-14-2007

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I tried about 9 other brothers and the answer was the same. No no no no no!!! you are not arab, pakistani, Indian etc, and you do not make $80,000 and up.So thats it I have had enough, forget marrying a muslim!!!!!! To much racism and high expictations. I make a good living to provide for a family, but because of my race I was denied by "so called muslims". And this is the view of the majority of muslims around the world unfortunatly.
yo thats messed up man, sorry to had to go through that bro it's one of the reason y Muslims in this mess we in, keep lookin though man. Inshallah.

how can you come to this conclusion after only going to 9 people, saying that this is the opinion of majority of muslims aint right, not all muslims will agree with this. It's only the ignorant ones who have little or no knowledge of islam.
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Default Re: Marry a muslim? heck no!!!! - 12-14-2007

Inshallah everything will work out.....
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Default Re: Marry a muslim? heck no!!!! - 12-14-2007



Inshaa Allaah.... Ameen!
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Default Re: Marry a muslim? heck no!!!! - 12-15-2007

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Salam alaikum brothers and sisters

As many of you know I am a muslim convert. I have a good job, good place to live and good deen. However when it comes to marriage, I dont want to marry a muslim. yes thats right!! But why you ask? Because in the Ummah their is to much racism and you have to be a rich person to get married. Let me explain.......................... before you jump on my back.

I went to this brother and asked him that I was interested in his daughter. I had just graduated from college, had and still have a good job. however this brother said NO! I asked him why and he said that I was not arab and that I did not fit the qualtfications for his daughter. you have to make $100,000 a year he said, and that I was not Egyptian.

Well I thanked him and went off on my way. I tried about 9 other brothers and the answer was the same. No no no no no!!! you are not arab, pakistani, Indian etc, and you do not make $80,000 and up.So thats it I have had enough, forget marrying a muslim!!!!!! To much racism and high expictations. I make a good living to provide for a family, but because of my race I was denied by "so called muslims". And this is the view of the majority of muslims around the world unfortunatly.

I have decided to look for a Christian or a Jew to marry. It is not forbidden for me, and the intermarriage racism that once existed in the christian/jewish majority is now almost gone. not totally, but better then 40 years ago.

Todays muslims are more worried about preseving their racial blood or nationality, then letting a good muslim marry his/her daughter. This disgusts me, but it is the truth....... please post your views and anything else that you want to share.
can't blame you.you are the not the only one though there are both Muslim men and women marrying NMs due to such reasons.
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Default Re: Marry a muslim? heck no!!!! - 12-19-2007

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Originally Posted by Belief_is_Power View Post
Salam alaikum brothers and sisters

As many of you know I am a muslim convert. I have a good job, good place to live and good deen. However when it comes to marriage, I dont want to marry a muslim. yes thats right!! But why you ask? Because in the Ummah their is to much racism and you have to be a rich person to get married. Let me explain.......................... before you jump on my back.

I went to this brother and asked him that I was interested in his daughter. I had just graduated from college, had and still have a good job. however this brother said NO! I asked him why and he said that I was not arab and that I did not fit the qualtfications for his daughter. you have to make $100,000 a year he said, and that I was not Egyptian.

Well I thanked him and went off on my way. I tried about 9 other brothers and the answer was the same. No no no no no!!! you are not arab, pakistani, Indian etc, and you do not make $80,000 and up.So thats it I have had enough, forget marrying a muslim!!!!!! To much racism and high expictations. I make a good living to provide for a family, but because of my race I was denied by "so called muslims". And this is the view of the majority of muslims around the world unfortunatly.

I have decided to look for a Christian or a Jew to marry. It is not forbidden for me, and the intermarriage racism that once existed in the christian/jewish majority is now almost gone. not totally, but better then 40 years ago.

Todays muslims are more worried about preseving their racial blood or nationality, then letting a good muslim marry his/her daughter. This disgusts me, but it is the truth....... please post your views and anything else that you want to share.
Salaam.

Yes you get those, but to be honest you really don't wan't such a father in law. You know what, if I was in your position and I approached the same people I would probably get the same response 99%, and I am born into a muslim family (not an arab).

Usually their is a big educational (islamic) and/or religiousity gap between older generation and the newer, especially those that are immigrants as ooposed to those who are brought up here.
I know this may not be always the reason they are like that but usually I find people who are more educated in Islam and are religious does not posses such issues.
You don' really have to be a revert to face those problem, usually those who are born in muslim family sometime face these problems.
We just been more attuned to it and have good eye for how and where to approach for marriages.
It may take time to find someone, but saying I don't wan't to marry a muslim does not help. Inshallah you woul find someone.

Edited: (Addition in red)
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Default Re: Marry a muslim? heck no!!!! - 12-28-2007

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I pray Allah allows you to find a good Muslim wife with an accepting family soon, ameen.
Insh'Allah, I pray for you too. Don't limit yourself, I would say. When I met my husband, a black African muslim, I was none of those things. Now, I have accepted Islam, I hold Africa in my heart and as for the color thing, well, He made us many nations and hues and gave us many tongues, that we may each find the right path.
   
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Default Re: Marry a muslim? heck no!!!! - 01-02-2008

Salaamu Alaikem

i've been a muslim for about 1 year now and i need some advice on something. There's this girl i know. She's a kaffir but she is chaste. She's also perfect in every possible way. Looks,personality. and she had/has a crush on me. She wasn't ghetto(i live in a bad neighborhood) like for instance i go to an alternative school it's only a couple hundred people that go there and the question was asked if they had a friend that died. she was one of the ones that didn't raise her hands. she wasn't stuck up she always seemed to be in a good mood she was funny she was smart and she also happened to be the most attractive girl i've seen in my entire life. so she stopped going to school all of a sudden. i know that dating is haram but that hasn't really soured the deal for me.
   
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Default Re: Marry a muslim? heck no!!!! - 01-02-2008

thats what you get when muslims mix culture and their islamic views and call it ISLAM, i am ashamed
   
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Default Re: Marry a muslim? heck no!!!! - 01-02-2008

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Salaamu Alaikem

i've been a muslim for about 1 year now and i need some advice on something. There's this girl i know. She's a kaffir but she is chaste. She's also perfect in every possible way. Looks,personality. and she had/has a crush on me. She wasn't ghetto(i live in a bad neighborhood) like for instance i go to an alternative school it's only a couple hundred people that go there and the question was asked if they had a friend that died. she was one of the ones that didn't raise her hands. she wasn't stuck up she always seemed to be in a good mood she was funny she was smart and she also happened to be the most attractive girl i've seen in my entire life. so she stopped going to school all of a sudden. i know that dating is haram but that hasn't really soured the deal for me.
Only chaste women from among the people of the Book are permissible, A kafirah will need to become a believer in order to become halal for a Muslim (which is difficult if not impossible) I, however have seen "Muslims" marry women from kuffaar with a quick name change (but no change in practices)
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Default Re: Marry a muslim? heck no!!!! - 01-02-2008

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Originally Posted by Belief_is_Power View Post
Salam alaikum brothers and sisters

As many of you know I am a muslim convert. I have a good job, good place to live and good deen. However when it comes to marriage, I dont want to marry a muslim. yes thats right!! But why you ask? Because in the Ummah their is to much racism and you have to be a rich person to get married. Let me explain.......................... before you jump on my back.

I went to this brother and asked him that I was interested in his daughter. I had just graduated from college, had and still have a good job. however this brother said NO! I asked him why and he said that I was not arab and that I did not fit the qualtfications for his daughter. you have to make $100,000 a year he said, and that I was not Egyptian.

Well I thanked him and went off on my way. I tried about 9 other brothers and the answer was the same. No no no no no!!! you are not arab, pakistani, Indian etc, and you do not make $80,000 and up.So thats it I have had enough, forget marrying a muslim!!!!!! To much racism and high expictations. I make a good living to provide for a family, but because of my race I was denied by "so called muslims". And this is the view of the majority of muslims around the world unfortunatly.

I have decided to look for a Christian or a Jew to marry. It is not forbidden for me, and the intermarriage racism that once existed in the christian/jewish majority is now almost gone. not totally, but better then 40 years ago.

Todays muslims are more worried about preseving their racial blood or nationality, then letting a good muslim marry his/her daughter. This disgusts me, but it is the truth....... please post your views and anything else that you want to share.
hola,

forbidding marriage with muslims and other non believers is not racism... aside from the not insignificant fact that muslims are not a race, our religions forbid marriage with non believers if we are concerned that it would endanger our religious development, our childrens' or if there is the prospect another religion would prevent our children or grandchildren from having a christian upbringing.

our relationship with the Lord comes before all other human relationships. you might consider our beliefs inferior, but demanding that not marrying you is racist is totally unwarranted. not that it matters to God or myself whether you consider putting God first in our lives racist.

in fairness, i think many muslim men are on the whole morally superior to christian men. i am impressed by some of the things muslims have said here, and those i know in real life. they seem to truly value 1. a personal and submissive relationship with God (like David or Joshua had), 2. living a just life and 3. seeking women who are chaste (which means they obey God) and pious (which shows that they love and fear God)...

many of the Christians men i know are not like this... they have fallen into the secular trap of worshipping secular love... desiring physical attractiveness and putting the women they are interested in on a pedestal, above God.

for me the most important thing in a husband is that they provide a reason for you to respect them... and i have a very strict criteria for that. men that belong to God, are strong in their devotion to God and build families around devotion to God are men that i respect. secular men want to put the girl before everything, good Catholics respect men who put God first...

those are the kinds of men that lead righteous lives and build righteous families with righteous women. that is what is important...

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Default Re: Marry a muslim? heck no!!!! - 01-02-2008

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Originally Posted by Mansa musa View Post
Salaamu Alaikem

i've been a muslim for about 1 year now and i need some advice on something. There's this girl i know. She's a kaffir but she is chaste. She's also perfect in every possible way. Looks,personality. and she had/has a crush on me. She wasn't ghetto(i live in a bad neighborhood) like for instance i go to an alternative school it's only a couple hundred people that go there and the question was asked if they had a friend that died. she was one of the ones that didn't raise her hands. she wasn't stuck up she always seemed to be in a good mood she was funny she was smart and she also happened to be the most attractive girl i've seen in my entire life. so she stopped going to school all of a sudden. i know that dating is haram but that hasn't really soured the deal for me.
Mansa Musa... the famous Mali emperor... a very fascinating person, i am really shocked that somebody else knows who he is...
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