Leave Policy

**zAk** · **Leave Policy -** 05-06-2006

FYI...new policy on sick leaves

Please ensure a 100% Adherence

TO: ALL EMPLOYEES
SUBJECT: SICK LEAVE POLICY

SICKNESS:
No excuse. We will no longer accept your doctor's
statement as proof. We believe that if you are
able to go to the doctor, you are able to come
to work.

AN OPERATION:
We are no longer allowing this practice. We wish
to discourage any thoughts that you may need an
operation. We believe that as long as you are an
employee here, you will need all of whatever you
have and should not consider having anything
removed. We hired you as you are and to have
anything removed would certainly make you less
than we bargained for.

DEATH:
Other than your own:
This is no excuse for missing work. There is
nothing you can do for them, and we are sure
that someone else can attend to the arrangements.
However, if the funeral can be held in the late
afternoon, we will be glad to allow you to work
through your lunch hour and subsequently let you
leave 1 hour early, provided your share of the
work is ahead enough to keep the job going in
your absence.

DEATH (YOUR OWN):
This will be accepted as an excuse. However, we
require at least two weeks notice as we feel it
is your duty to train your replacement.

ALSO:
Entirely too much time is being spent in the
restroom. In the future, we will follow the
practice of going in alphabetical order. For
instance, those whose names begin with "A" will
go from 8:00-8:15, and so on. If you're unable
to go at your time, it will be necessary to
wait until the next day when your time comes
again.

We appreciate your cooperation,
THE MANAGEMENT

AsIaN_qUeEn · **Re: Leave Policy -** 05-06-2006

mwahahahahahaaaaaaa dats funny

sapphire · **Re: Leave Policy -** 05-06-2006

thts hilariousss !! haha ! ive read tht b4 with out the pics tho.......

hafizmo · 07:01 AM

lol i got this as a email

rukx · **Re: Leave Policy -** 05-07-2006

Lol Dats Funni!!! Gud 1!!!

Nawal89 · **Re: Leave Policy -** 05-08-2006

now isnt that evil...lol.

nurah19 · **Re: Leave Policy -** 05-08-2006

salams lol, especially the part about if die give two wks notice, i am glad i don't work for that magmt.

Muslim Soldier · **Re: Leave Policy -** 05-08-2006

$tranger · **Re: Leave Policy -** 08-05-2007

hehehe

hafizyunus · **Re: Leave Policy -** 08-05-2007

Haha.2 Week notice before your own death.

Protected_Diamond · **Re: Leave Policy -** 08-06-2007

YIkes!!! Im glad i don't work for an employer with them rules!!!

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	(#1 (permalink))
zAk вoяn тo dιє Status: Offline Posts: 20,189 Reputation: 42954 Rep Power: 96 Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: 1750 ft. Above sea level. Gender: Way of Life: Muslim	Leave Policy - 05-06-2006 FYI...new policy on sick leaves Please ensure a 100% Adherence TO: ALL EMPLOYEES SUBJECT: SICK LEAVE POLICY SICKNESS: No excuse. We will no longer accept your doctor's statement as proof. We believe that if you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work. AN OPERATION: We are no longer allowing this practice. We wish to discourage any thoughts that you may need an operation. We believe that as long as you are an employee here, you will need all of whatever you have and should not consider having anything removed. We hired you as you are and to have anything removed would certainly make you less than we bargained for. DEATH: Other than your own: This is no excuse for missing work. There is nothing you can do for them, and we are sure that someone else can attend to the arrangements. However, if the funeral can be held in the late afternoon, we will be glad to allow you to work through your lunch hour and subsequently let you leave 1 hour early, provided your share of the work is ahead enough to keep the job going in your absence. DEATH (YOUR OWN): This will be accepted as an excuse. However, we require at least two weeks notice as we feel it is your duty to train your replacement. ALSO: Entirely too much time is being spent in the restroom. In the future, we will follow the practice of going in alphabetical order. For instance, those whose names begin with "A" will go from 8:00-8:15, and so on. If you're unable to go at your time, it will be necessary to wait until the next day when your time comes again. We appreciate your cooperation, THE MANAGEMENT __________________

	(#3 (permalink))
sapphire LI Oldskool Status: Offline Posts: 3,258 Reputation: 9543 Rep Power: 34 Join Date: Jul 2005 Gender: Way of Life: Muslim	Re: Leave Policy - 05-06-2006 thts hilariousss !! haha ! ive read tht b4 with out the pics tho....... __________________

	(#4 (permalink))
hafizmo LI Oldskool Status: Offline Posts: 2,731 Reputation: 679 Rep Power: 18 Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Orlando,Florida U.S.A Gender: Way of Life: Muslim	Re: Leave Policy - 05-06-2006 lol i got this as a email __________________ United we stand, Divided we fall....visit my site....The avatar I have is my own work please respect that and do not copy it thankz.. Last edited by zAk; 05-07-2006 at 07:01 AM.

	(#5 (permalink))
rukx طالب العلم Status: Offline Posts: 88 Reputation: 67 Rep Power: 20 Join Date: Jul 2005 Gender: Way of Life: Muslim	Re: Leave Policy - 05-07-2006 Lol Dats Funni!!! Gud 1!!!

	(#6 (permalink))
Nawal89 LI Oldskool Status: Online Posts: 1,799 Reputation: 9328 Rep Power: 30 Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: in a village. Gender: Way of Life: Muslim	Re: Leave Policy - 05-08-2006 now isnt that evil...lol.

	(#7 (permalink))
nurah19 fre2dove Status: Offline Posts: 40 Reputation: 56 Rep Power: 0 Join Date: May 2005 Location: Maryland Gender: Way of Life: Muslim	Re: Leave Policy - 05-08-2006 salams lol, especially the part about if die give two wks notice, i am glad i don't work for that magmt.

	(#8 (permalink))
Muslim Soldier Slave of Allah Status: Offline Posts: 1,753 Reputation: 456 Rep Power: 17 Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Behind You! BOO Gender: Way of Life: Muslim	Re: Leave Policy - 05-08-2006 haha __________________ Don't Click Me (Updated) Updated 24/7 I am but a student. Please correct me if I am wrong. May Allah forgive my lapses. If you want to see the rainbow, you have to survive the storm.

	(#9 (permalink))
$tranger LI OldTimer Status: Offline Posts: 92 Reputation: 674 Rep Power: 11 Join Date: Dec 2006 Way of Life: Muslim	Re: Leave Policy - 08-05-2007 hehehe

	(#10 (permalink))
hafizyunus Allah Knows Best Status: Offline Posts: 298 Reputation: 194 Rep Power: 15 Join Date: May 2006 Location: England Gender: Way of Life: Muslim	Re: Leave Policy - 08-05-2007 Haha.2 Week notice before your own death. __________________ حفيظ يونس Its raining! Its pouring! You are really boring! So I am gone, but not for long! Dont have a fit! Ill be back in a bit! . New Userpage

	(#11 (permalink))
Protected_Diamond LI Oldskool Status: Offline Posts: 1,813 Reputation: 2460 Rep Power: 25 Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Dunya Gender: Way of Life: Muslim	Re: Leave Policy - 08-06-2007 YIkes!!! Im glad i don't work for an employer with them rules!!! __________________ “Whoever puts his trust in Allah, sufficient is Allah for him.” I never saw anyone as just as the world. As long as you pursue the world it will pursue you, but when you turn away from it and seek God, it will leave you alone and its glamour shall no longer fascinate you.