I wanted to share with you a situation I encountered last week, well actually two situations. Last week wasnt my week really.
First one was when I and a sister where out shopping and took a bus to the mall. We were sitting in the bus at the back and like a metre away from us there was this old couple looking at us in a weird way. This sister was sitting next to me further away from that couple and started talking about stuff. I heard half her story cos I was focused on the couple that was looking very strangely. Like they saw some aliens or so. They were thinking I was concentrating on this sisters story and I was acting like I did (she does talk a lot) Anyway I heard the woman wispering something to her husband. And the husband answered a bit too loud. Cos I could hear what he said: "They look like nuns!". I was shocked seriously. I didnt even know what to do or say. I wore an Abaya and Hijaab and so was this sister but still they didnt have the right to say that..
Second incident was at an italian restaurant with some classmates. I was asking some lady were the bathroom was cos I couldnt find it. Then some guests at a table nearby said: "Shes a muslim, guess she never went at a restaurant!" Again I was shocked and didnt know what to do or say.
My question for you all is: have you ever been in such a situation? What did you do? What should I do?
It does hurt by the way hear them say such things about my beautiful religion. I also cant stand the rudeness of it.
its really hard living in the western country these days but the think to do is keep your head up and dont let comments affect ur belief as u may know allah knows best
It depends where you live in the west. I live in Toronto, Canada and it is VERY multicultural. Everyone gets along with everyone here.
Well it might sound trite, but if you study why we are of different coulur and creeds from a historical perspective, you can answer them thus.
" Hey Paki! Get back to Africa!!"
"Actually Pakistan is Eastern Asia, Regardless, You no doubt refer to the Homo Hablias our decendent who originated in Africa? Then indeed you should make your way there alongside myself"
This will utterly refute them. But it might ensue in a certain amount of kicking in of faces.
Rest assured, if you are in a & e with a broken face. You will still have been correct
Occupation: The term of control of a territory by foreign military forces: Iraq 2003-2005 Liberation:when something or someone is freed: Operation Telic 2003
If someone thought I was a nun I wouldnt be offended but that second comment was rude. It's always better to take the high road but I don't think I would have kept quiet in that situation so it's good that you did.
Salam
This reminds me of an incident years ago of a woman who came into my dads restaurant. She was complaining about how afraid she was because a mosque had recently been opened in her town. She said something along the lines of it being a terrorist training facility.
The way she talked though, was more ignorance than anything else. She didnt even know what a mosque was. She came in frequently enough that I felt comfortable explaining to her what a mosque was and that they are not terrorist training facilities like the media can often make them out to be.
You cant really change what these people think or say. However, if they bother you physically or verbally, as in they direct attacks to you. You have every right to call the police and report the incident. I have done so before and wouldnt hesitate to again. Sometimes people need a good swift kick in the rear.
Why did you find "they look like nuns" insulting? It was only an observation and related to something they understand. Obviously you are not a nun, but they don't know what your dress is called or why you wear it. You should also take into account that they are old. If they are native to Holland they grew up in a time when there wasn't any ethnic diversity. Its probably been hard for them to adapt. Unless they start insulting you, I wouldn't take it as offence... more curiousity.
The second one was an insult and you did well to ignore it. It might have been good to say something hurtful back though.
It was the looks brother, the looks. That gives a whole other charge to a message then when you read it here. To bad you couldnt see it really.
format_quote Originally Posted by barney
Well it might sound trite, but if you study why we are of different coulur and creeds from a historical perspective, you can answer them thus.
" Hey Paki! Get back to Africa!!"
"Actually Pakistan is Eastern Asia, Regardless, You no doubt refer to the Homo Hablias our decendent who originated in Africa? Then indeed you should make your way there alongside myself"
This will utterly refute them. But it might ensue in a certain amount of kicking in of faces.
Rest assured, if you are in a & e with a broken face. You will still have been correct
I have totally noo idea what you mean by this. Sorry my english isnt that very good.
format_quote Originally Posted by AlbanianMuslim
You cant really change what these people think or say. However, if they bother you physically or verbally, as in they direct attacks to you. You have every right to call the police and report the incident. I have done so before and wouldnt hesitate to again. Sometimes people need a good swift kick in the rear.
I wonder sometimes whether this will be the future. Whether theres gonna be a time where Muslims get physically assulted because of their religion.
i find it really absurd when old people shout out racist comments.
in my town u get more old people being the racist ones than the youngsters here.
i mean its really pathetic i would expect them to be the more tolerant ones, once i was in town with my sister, and this old racist guy, shouted out to my sister (btw shes wears a niqab), "move, before I kick ur head of"!!!??
u cant really do much apart from ignore these stupid comments they make.
I wanted to share with you a situation I encountered last week, well actually two situations. Last week wasnt my week really.
First one was when I and a sister where out shopping and took a bus to the mall. We were sitting in the bus at the back and like a metre away from us there was this old couple looking at us in a weird way. This sister was sitting next to me further away from that couple and started talking about stuff. I heard half her story cos I was focused on the couple that was looking very strangely. Like they saw some aliens or so. They were thinking I was concentrating on this sisters story and I was acting like I did (she does talk a lot) Anyway I heard the woman wispering something to her husband. And the husband answered a bit too loud. Cos I could hear what he said: "They look like nuns!". I was shocked seriously. I didnt even know what to do or say. I wore an Abaya and Hijaab and so was this sister but still they didnt have the right to say that..
Second incident was at an italian restaurant with some classmates. I was asking some lady were the bathroom was cos I couldnt find it. Then some guests at a table nearby said: "Shes a muslim, guess she never went at a restaurant!" Again I was shocked and didnt know what to do or say.
My question for you all is: have you ever been in such a situation? What did you do? What should I do?
It does hurt by the way hear them say such things about my beautiful religion. I also cant stand the rudeness of it.
Naisha, I would like to officially appologise to you on behaf of all Italian...restaurants and their owners (Only if they're Italian, if they're something else, i don't care, they shouldn't have an Italian restaurant).
Second I would lke to appologise on behaf of "People who call you Nun's ...people" They don't know
Just take it all out on me. They are ignorant and don't understand.
I remember in Catholic school and church....the Nunn's would get you good for doing something wrong, my knuckles have huge scars from those rules they smack your hand with and they had a paddle! you know.....for your rear
i find it really absurd when old people shout out racist comments.
in my town u get more old people being the racist ones than the youngsters here.
i mean its really pathetic i would expect them to be the more tolerant ones, once i was in town with my sister, and this old racist guy, shouted out to my sister (btw shes wears a niqab), "move, before I kick ur head of"!!!??
u cant really do much apart from ignore these stupid comments they make.
is it any wonder they're kids end up being racist, I've noticed they love being racist towards woman more than men. what does that tell you about them
Naisha, I would like to officially appologise to you on behaf of all Italian...restaurants and their owners (Only if they're Italian, if they're something else, i don't care, they shouldn't have an Italian restaurant).
Its ok to be Italian, you don't have to apologise. Seriously though, why? It wasn't the restaurant owners who said anything.
format_quote Originally Posted by Italianguy
Second I would lke to appologise on behaf of "People who call you Nun's ...people" They don't know
I would like to officially apologise on behalf of Gavrilo Princip for the assassination of Archduke Franz Ferdinand (hey I figure since we're apologising... ).
My question for you all is: have you ever been in such a situation? What did you do? What should I do?
One time this old lady told me to line up at a bus stop. I was really annoyed by this because no one lines up at a bus stop so i told her to back of in the nicest possible way.
Was I supposed to listen to this woman? Absolutely not even though lining up is a good practice. She can’ tell me to do something that I am not obliged to. It's not fair and it's not in the law that I have to obey and that she happens to be reminding me. I would have lined up if she had told everyone to line up first.
These kinds of things happen a lot where I live. I've seen it happening to others with my own eyes. People like this; you have to stand up to in the best possible manner.
In situations where people are wisperhing to each other, i would suggest walking away because you might have misheard and they'll just think you're looking for trouble.
One time this old lady told me to line up at a bus stop. I was really annoyed by this because no one lines up at a bus stop so i told her to back of in the nicest possible way.
Was I supposed to listen to this woman? Absolutely not even though lining up is a good practice. She can’ tell me to do something that I am not obliged to. It's not fair and it's not in the law that I have to obey and that she happens to be reminding me. I would have lined up if she had told everyone to line up first.
These kinds of things happen a lot where I live. I've seen it happening to others with my own eyes. People like this; you have to stand up to in the best possible manner.
In situations where people are wisperhing to each other, i would suggest walking away because you might have misheard and they'll just think you're looking for trouble.
Don't feel down sister.
actually the law is your meant to line up.. you can look it up yourself whether your standing at a bus stop a train people cant even let the bloody bus stop they are always walking in front of it and dont give any care to any elders
I wonder sometimes whether this will be the future. Whether theres gonna be a time where Muslims get physically assulted because of their religion.
Future? Sorry sis, but it is happening NOW. Girls have gotten their hijabs torn off, slanderous comments thrown at them, treated unfairly at work, you name it it is happening now. You have to be vigilant and careful especially if you are a muslimah that is covered.
One time this old lady told me to line up at a bus stop. I was really annoyed by this because no one lines up at a bus stop so i told her to back of in the nicest possible way.
Was I supposed to listen to this woman? Absolutely not even though lining up is a good practice. She can’ tell me to do something that I am not obliged to. It's not fair and it's not in the law that I have to obey and that she happens to be reminding me. I would have lined up if she had told everyone to line up first.
.
Sorry sis, and please dont take this the wrong way, but it doesnt pay to be stubborn in those types of situations. I used to be EXTREMELY stubborn, if a woman had said that to me years ago, i would have told her to back up and NOT in a nice way but one of the things I have learned is that being stubborn doesnt benefit you in any way. I could be wrong, but i dont think this lady was telling you to line up because you were muslim, and even if it was what she said really wasnt THAT bad. Some of the older women hold fast to rules. They rely on them. She might be the type who feels the need to be the first one on the bus and doesnt want anyone to cut her.
In situations like that, I would count to 10 and take deep breaths. Not get angry or say anything, just smile and nod. If you didnt want to do it, just dont do it, move further from her.
Return unkindness with kindness, she will feel like a fool while you will gain points for patience.
Remember sisters, we must bite our tongues when we can. There are time where we MUST say something, but that is only when it is absolutely necessary. If you can manage getting out of a situation without saying a word, the better. Ignorant people WANT you to say something so they have an excuse to push you around even more.
Future? Sorry sis, but it is happening NOW. Girls have gotten their hijabs torn off, slanderous comments thrown at them, treated unfairly at work, you name it it is happening now. You have to be vigilant and careful especially if you are a muslimah that is covered.
oh: REALLY?? OMG...I never thought of anyone pulling my Hijaab off. I would cry of being soo shocked. I would feel naked seriously. Where does this happen?? So you know..I can avoid that place.
format_quote Originally Posted by Italianguy
Naisha, I would like to officially appologise to you on behaf of all Italian...restaurants and their owners (Only if they're Italian, if they're something else, i don't care, they shouldn't have an Italian restaurant).
I remember in Catholic school and church....the Nunn's would get you good for doing something wrong, my knuckles have huge scars from those rules they smack your hand with and they had a paddle! you know.....for your rear
Sorry I brought the nun thing up then, triggered some traumatic events then. In Qoranschool they used to slap your fingertops with a ruler.
But the rear?? Ouch!
And ItalianDude its ok you dont have to apollogise, dont think the owners were Italian. The food was good though. Love lasagna!! How are you by the way?
The lining up thing sounds very like the slavetime you know. When black people were treated differently. Sit in the back off the bus. Walking round them in a big bow. You know that kind of things.
format_quote Originally Posted by KittenLover
is it any wonder they're kids end up being racist, I've noticed they love being racist towards woman more than men. what does that tell you about them
I actually have rascist neigbours. Got up to a point when their daughter was forbidden to play with my little sister.
When the whole 9/11 thing happened they stopped saying hi and stuff. Bought some huge dogs, sad seriously.
Are you sure it was racism? Maybe the first couple were just curious or confused. Maybe the other comment about the bathroom was a genuine misconception and they didn't mean anything bad by it?
I'm not saying that's the case. I'm just trying to look at things from a different angle.
True, we can consider this. But yes from other posts it seems more like racism then anything.
Offtopic - I lived in Warrington!!
Anyway, the best thing to do, as someone said before, is to ignore them. They say things and act like this because it's not what they are accustomed to. Also we should have patience. Without patience in every matter we cannot hope to succeed.
"By Al-'Asr (the time).
Verily! Man is in loss,
Except those who believe and do righteous good deeds, and recommend one another to the truth (i.e. order one another to perform all kinds of good deeds which Allah has ordained, and abstain from all kinds of sins and evil deeds which Allah has forbidden), and recommend one another to patience (for the sufferings, harms, and injuries which one may encounter in Allah's cause)." [Surah Al Asr - 103:1-3]
actually the law is your meant to line up.. you can look it up yourself whether your standing at a bus stop a train people cant even let the bloody bus stop they are always walking in front of it and dont give any care to any elders
It was practically impossible to line up at that bus stop. Firstly, because there were too many people at the stop and they were all taking different buses so you need to make a least five different lines for it to work. Secondly, the footpath was too small and it was busy which meant that it would cause problem to the pedestrians.
She had no problem catching the bus. If she did, of course, i would have helped her.
By the way she said these were her "principles", nothing to do with the law.
Me and my friends were waiting for the bus once and we wern't waiting in the bus shelter we were waiting on the side, when we first started waiting the bus shelter was empty no people waiting for the bus. By the time the bus came the bus shelter had a long que, so anyway when it came we walked straight to the front to get on it looked as if we had pushed in but we were there before all those people
this african lady said to us "This is Britain you know" cos she thought we were pushing in, we just looked at her with raised eye brows, my friend started laughing then we all began laughing, we just waited till the entire que got on the bus.
then got on.
“Who said that guidance requires there to be someone accompanying you"
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if i was called a nun i would be a offended because nuns do not marry and practically live an isolated life away from the real world
).
oh: REALLY?? OMG...I never thought of anyone pulling my Hijaab off. I would cry of being soo shocked. I would feel naked seriously. Where does this happen?? So you know..I can avoid that place.
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