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Thread: Dad

  1. #1
    Human_Being's Avatar
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    Dad

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    I met my dad 2day 4 the first time since months and he heard from my granny i converted 2 islam and when i met him he was so angry i didnt understand y cuz granny said he wasnt happy but when i met him he was much angrier.

    He said so many hateful things against islam and against muslims like and against Allah and the prophets and said that they were evil and terrorists and he ranted about how the horrible things people have done in the name of Allah by ppl but i said its not right for a muslim 2 kill and there are muslims who do evil things but he keeps saying i turned into one of THEM and i need 2 come back 2 my own ppl.

    I never knew my dad growing up so i wanted 2 rebild a relationship with him but he says he never wants 2 see me again and he loves me but im not welcom as long as im muslim i can never set foot in his house and he says its the worst thing in his eyes that i cud ever have done

    I pray 2 Allah that i never go astray no matter what anyone tells me 2 do but I kno i shud never let ties be severed between me and parents but at the same time i musnt disobey my parents

    so what shud i do shud i respect his wishes 2 not see him again or shud I try 2 maintain ties with him? IDK cuz like its a hard choice man i remember wen i was 3 bein hysterical cryin for him and its always affected me bad like but now i dont think i want 2 see him again after everythin he said
    Dad

    i wanted gender to be anon but everyone kept callin me bruv so i set my gender lol

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    aadil77's Avatar
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    Re: Dad

    give him some time, he'll accept it once he see the positive changes in you
    Last edited by Hamza Asadullah; 04-25-2011 at 06:50 PM. Reason: The second part is good advice but the first part is unneccesery.
    Dad


    He it is Who sends blessings on you, as do His angels, that He may bring you out from the depths of Darkness into Light: and He is Full of Mercy to the Believers. [Quran {33:43}]
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    Ğħαrєєвαħ's Avatar
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    Re: Dad

    Assalaamu Alaaykum

    You should try show him the teachings of Islaam, and tell him to show you the proof which person on this world there is that hasnt done bad.

    There is a bad person in every group, but this doesnt mean you should blame the whole group for it. Maybe you should challenge him like your father, to find anything in the Quraan /Islaam that he disagrees with and also have it explained to him, he may have misunderstandings (only if your knowledgeable, or to ask someone knowledgeable to explain to him) or as much as you are able to. Show him that your not interested in all this war/hate business, and you want peace.

    Maybe if you found out where he got this idea that muslims are terrorists, and tell him what they do is wrong and show him evidence from the Quraan, that this book is against this etc. Maybe explaining to him what this western world does, what they do isnt bad? What thing have they done that is good? Like explaining the war in Iraq, etc etc. They are killing civilians in the name of what? their silly desires? Compare them to each other, and they both as bad as each other. Explain to him, if Islaam really teaches this stuff, then dont you think your family would be in danger? By being kind to them, speaking words of goodness, respecting and loving parents no matter how hard they make it for you, you still smile. Is this evil? Your their daughter, you need to build a relationship of trust between them inshaAllaah. To make them realise what your doing isnt harmful to anyone or ownself.

    It is hard yes, but somehow you have to convince him to realise the truth about Islaam and not some lies and misconceptions about Islaam which doesnt teach non of this bad stuff.

    I hope i helped a little bit and apologise if i said anything wrong, correct me if so.
    Dad

    "Allah! La ilaha illa Huwa (none has the right to be worshipped but He), Al-Hayyul-Qayyum (the Ever Living, the One Who sustains and protects all that exists).".."[Al Qur'aan 3:2]

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    Re: Dad

    he says he doesnt want 2 listen 2 me and when i tried 2 expliain hejust talked over me spouting hatred and racism and white supremacy crap like he refuses 2 even accept islam is for all races not just arabs any evidence i tell him about islam not being all about terrorism he thinks is propaganda he believes all the docs on the telly that r against islam he's not open 2 reason

    i dont think i can show him cuz he now refuses to ever see me unless i say im not muslim which is a no no and he never used to see me much anyway
    Dad

    i wanted gender to be anon but everyone kept callin me bruv so i set my gender lol

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    Re: Dad

    Quote Originally Posted by Human_Being View Post

    so what shud i do shud i respect his wishes 2 not see him again or shud I try 2 maintain ties with him? IDK cuz like its a hard choice man i remember wen i was 3 bein hysterical cryin for him and its always affected me bad like but now i dont think i want 2 see him again after everythin he said


    I think he was shocked. For now, I think you should not see him for a little while. Hopefully he will feel better and might start talking to you about this.
    Dad

    I was looking at myself talking to myself and I realized this conversation...I was having with myself looking at myself was a conversation with myself that I needed to have with myself.

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    Re: Dad

    so i wont b helsd responsible 4 not seein him i shud just stay out of his way unless he calms down inshallah?
    Dad

    i wanted gender to be anon but everyone kept callin me bruv so i set my gender lol

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    Re: Dad

    Quote Originally Posted by Human_Being View Post
    so i wont b helsd responsible 4 not seein him i shud just stay out of his way unless he calms down inshallah?
    Yes, I think that would be the safer option.
    Dad

    I was looking at myself talking to myself and I realized this conversation...I was having with myself looking at myself was a conversation with myself that I needed to have with myself.

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    Re: Dad

    Prejudice is alive and well even in people who you would never expect to be prejudiced. Your father could probably accept any other person on earth as being Muslim. But he has seen his daughter become something he was not ready for. Time is the cure. Keep your door open for him. but do not knock on his door unless he invites you too. Do not be angry towards him. Keep your heart open for feeling pity towards him.
    Dad




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    Ummu Sufyaan's Avatar
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    Re: Dad


    may allah make things easy for you.
    Keep being kind to him, even if he is angry. dont fuel his anger by getting on the defensive, talk things out logically and rationally with him....this inshallah will make him come around.

    dont cut ties with him, but when you meet him, just be patient and kind to him becuase if you cut ties with him, then he may truly have a bad image of Islam. but if you are nice to him (or at-least dont stir his anger-which im sure you dont do anyway), it may cause him to think twice.

    imagine that you walk away from him now. what impression is that going to leave on him?
    Dad

    ...desperate for husnul-khitaam...


    please make dua that Allah grants me a good end (to my life). please make dua that Allah guides me.


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    Re: Dad

    im not walkin away from him he's forbidden me from seeing him like i feel he is really bad for me and i dont even kno him that well cuz wev only met a few times hes like a stranger 2 me

    no its not just shock this is his deep held beliefs he doesnt accept any muslims he hates them always has

    he wont even let me talk 2 him so i can leave him be yes and i dont hav 2 keep tryin 2 contact him?
    Dad

    i wanted gender to be anon but everyone kept callin me bruv so i set my gender lol

  14. #11
    Hamza Asadullah's Avatar
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    Re: Dad

    Quote Originally Posted by Human_Being View Post
    im not walkin away from him he's forbidden me from seeing him like i feel he is really bad for me and i dont even kno him that well cuz wev only met a few times hes like a stranger 2 me

    no its not just shock this is his deep held beliefs he doesnt accept any muslims he hates them always has

    he wont even let me talk 2 him so i can leave him be yes and i dont hav 2 keep tryin 2 contact him?
    Asalaamu Alaikum, just continue to show him goodness in return for his harshness and eventually he will see good in your coversion to Islam. Tell him that you will leave the door open for him if he ever wants to contact you as Islam says we should never cut off ties with our parents. Then just give him time for things to sink in because it can't be easy for him to suddenly accept such a thing.

    He obviously has preconcieved biases from the media or what he has read or heard from others regarding Islam. So as well as telling him that you will leave your door open to him also tell him to look into Islam for himself and he will see it is not what is portrayed in the media or what he may have heard from others.

    Ask of Allah to soften his heart and to make his heart accept your conversion. Continue to ask Allah to soften his heart with you and to also guide him and open his heart so that he can look into Islam for himself and see the beauty of it and eventually accept the truth.

    So tell him that you will always leave your door open to him and then wait for him to contact you however long that takes. Eventually he will come around inshallah.

    May Allah soften your fathers heart and guide him to the right path. Ameen
    Dad

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