brother,
I think that the 'inappropriateness' of a woman approaching a man for marriage stems more from cultural barriers than islamic ones.
I am reminded of Khadija (ra) who first showed interest towards our prophet (sallalahu alaihi wasalam) - I would imagine, that this may have been more difficult for her considering that she was his (sallahu alaihi wasalam) employer, older than him and widowed.
Yet, alhamdulillah, what a beautiful marriage resulted from this union.
Having said this, I do understand why most women will not approach a man for marriage.
I am also much tooo shy/ introverted (it may not seem as such on the forum, because my posts tend to be lengthier I plan
) in life, to ever do so....
Even if I were to find interest in someone, I would likely wait and make duaa, than to ever make my interest known directly.
However, there are also sisters who more self-confident, extroverted in nature and will not hesitate to make the necessary efforts towards her goal. MashaAllah, for these sisters there is no harm, if they have the correct intentions in this regard.
I know of a few sisters who 'made the first move' in indicating their interests towards a brother, and alhamdulillah, it resulted in marriage : )
I think that the sisters who are too shy probably get left behind in many things in life
As you have mentioned, in these cases, they can possibly find 'indirect' methods of approaching a brother:
e.g. a family member/ friend can casually discuss the topic of marriage with the desired brother - and determine if he is interested in settling down or not.
If he is interested, then the sisters name can be dropped into the conversation, and her positive attributes mentioned.
In this way, the brother has become aware of her, and can approach her wali if he feels in the same way.
If he does not do so, then it would probably indicate that he does not find the same interest in her.
In this manner, in shaa Allah, sisters can also make some (indirect) effort in seeking a potential spouse : )
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