I'm in very much troubles from all-around. Family,the East&West,Muslims themselves, the evil ones,affected with evil eye,suffering from deepest oppression since midteens & seen myself as if I'm in hell & mocker outside in real life ....They were or still ISIL dudes & they rude on me like dogs ride scooters !
So much sufferings upon sufferings ....marriage frauds etc .....so many good dreams of good rank in JAnnah came but I don't buy dreams anymore because it don't care,I want revenge against oppressors more than ever .
ALLAH Ta'ala made oppression Haram on Himself & Haram on others ,so those whose evil eye I'm affected with since years have made me insane & in Dec,I felt I lost sanity....I'm so worried .
Don't understand why all the sufferings happening at the same time.
And I'm Noit greedy for JAnnah anymore. because my oppression is real & unforgettable & unforgivable.....
That's why I make dua that I just get a death with ease & forever end after yawmal Qiyamah & want my oppressors punished because it suffered alot of turmoil & deepest oppression so I'm not interested in JAnnah but just want to see enemy in hell in real life because I cannot narrate all that I suffered as Everything from 16th year of my life us shocking with good &bad& now it's worst!
I might die soon but please make dua against my oppressors because we ought to be Just for our Deen & ourselves & I have been affected with their Nahs feelings & sickness .....I wasn't like this before & I tried & tried but few last month's,was a meltdown!
I have dignity for Deen & myself & I suffered hellish stuff because of those dogs so you can imagine a person trying since tears on his Imaan,in forbidding evil& doing good in a house that was no practicing with patience & extreme trials & then also working FisabeelIllah ,travelling etc etc ....
Now ,I suffer from even sleep whenever I sleep,I wake up in depression that I can't getvup to Salaah which was never the case before & I am struggling to remain good .
I would say I have had dreams of Firdaws many of its gladtidings but I don't give a little value to it because I fear to be in hell & I fear to be in JAnnah&%meet those dogs !
My Deen got crashed, my friends,family & \ neighborhood are a witness to my screams % I wasn't like this .
THIS has certainly gotten too far & I'm not interested in rewards of world & akhirah -only safety & revenge !
WAllah!
I haven't been wasting my life,energy, Imaan & risking my life for oppression upon oppression!
Please make Duas for me & if I get imprisoned, know I'm not a liar .
Neither schizo nor Sihr affected ,Alhamdull'ILLAH, its more like evil eye & I had dreams years ago OF good & evil jealous people !
So,I can feel it & I'm done !
I was going to commit suicide three days ago ,so I decided to read up on how to & found out great news from my friends who are suffering terrible trials,so decided to keep hope but I don't need JAnnah &, I fear to be in hell .
I can feel how closely ALLAH Ta'ala is Watching me & feels ihsaan but I'm done !
I'm a weak tested oppressed sister of yours & only strive for ISLAM Because it's worth it -Its filled with intellect & virtue... Alhamdull'ILLAH, love being a Momin FisabeelIllah
This Religion is a path to guidance & suffering & rewards but this woman is done with thinking if rewards because seeing hell with your mockers will kill anyone % screaming & deepest dark scary nights....I bet no one can tolerate after 12 yrs torture!
I need Duas of yours all sincerely to ALLAH Al Kareem ,to punish my oppressors& guide me to secure dunya & akhirah, without any azaab& reward.
I'm an oppressed sister whose Duas will be accepted & I will make Duas for all of you ....InshaALLAH except for my enemies!
These are two dreams that came true ,signyfying I'm oppressed & asking for a duaa.
From my stories-Series
"ISLAM is a fragrance"
My heart swooned with delight
As I found Islam.com At Night
As excited as finding the "Treasure" that I never knew
Without a hunch,asked how to get this treasure
They posted halal/Haram list on my askance
My life started shining
As a girl all alone with powerful Imaan
Facing troubles & serinity with the imaan
My happiness was as if I was not in world
Fasting/worship /zuhd all I tried& got my family skirming at me
Did you lose your tongue, or you are no more our family who was on high !
But I knew my RABB was there to help me go through problems
Till my dad's strictness in nature scared me when I had to stop wrong with hands
So,the fear of Hell &its deep reading brought me to face anyone
Because, I knew ALLAH was Greater in Punishment
Hell could happen but dad could only shout
Hell could burn but my dad could only be angry for a while
I moved to college only to sit in library
And cry for love of ALLAH, JAnnah&reminders about hell&death
The people found me a pious good girl though who was never bothered with good looks
After Islamic fragrance touched her
In high spirits, I encountered every mini Tyrants
In good health, I thanked ALLAH
Fragrance of Islam was beautiful
And I was telling them
As my life was blooming
And My life&death being devoted to Almighty
Helping in housechores that I was never doing before
Things that I never did of virtue were the fragrance of Islam
Fragrance of Islam
My love then & Always
Alhamdull'ILLAH
The dreams were of a blessing to me
Teaching me that your reward is with ALLAH
I trusted ALLAH!
The Merciful King of all the Kings
Who I knew as would always be there for me
Thanking Him & crying for Beautiful Islam was my way & today I cried again
THE Spotless Deen in Spotlight
Like a Full Moon &a brilliant Rose amongst all roses
Like a best perfume of all scents
As something that's Superior of all the rest
Bestest of the Best
This is a Religion that asks us to pay the price for loving it & Upholding it
My sisters who I have love for here,
Hold it like you would hold to a burning coal in your hand
Though it's Fragrance
And who wants to let go of fragrances?
We are indeed paying high price for our love for Deen
In the form of calamities
Crumbling us down
Shaking us to core
Drowning us
Terrifying us
That's what happens when you fall in love with
"La ilaha illa ALLAH"
Fragrant Islam that we received after more than 1400 years ago
Keep your fragrant Imaan,filled with your good deeds
My love for ISLAM grows but I don't think I'm worth it
My trials that started with blooms turned into glooms not blooms&won't in future
Fragrance!
The Prophet (sal ALLAH hu alyhe wasallam) loved Beautiful fragrances
&he loved the Fragrance of Islam most!
my Love for ISLAM, may ALLAH keep alive Always!
Aameen Ya Rabb Ya Rahman!
Beautiful musk may ALLAH Ta'ala grant me while I die
With Shahadah on my heart&mind with Soul
Tongue reciting KalimatUllah
A grave filled with light& musk
And the man who I was promised all my life ,but never came to we'd
Only reciting Fateha & keeping me in Duas for forgiveness
Fragrant as Always
Islam-The Love that I just cherished
My condition is the very same as yours to be honest. I have trust in my friend Allah. My protector who has provided for me before, during and after birth. He is the sustainer. I would love to go through trials and tribulation in this life because I want to be rewarded immensely by Allah.
My dua is with you that Allah gives you ease and comfort.
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