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Cheating after Marriage

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    Uno's Avatar Limited Member
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    Cheating after Marriage

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    Assalamualaikum

    Brothers and SistersIm a Muslem Guy 26 years from Ankara Turkey right now in Düsseldorf, married before 2 years ago and got a child now. Im with my wife since im 10, actualy 16 years with her together and im proud of it holding for so many years together. Im working in a company mixed Man and Woman i am very kind to the other wifes respekting them how a muslim rly schould. Im working here almost 4 years and i was having a good friendship (talking all problems to each other) with a woman in the same company she is 27 married too and got 2 childs. I saw her always looking me with a strange eye and after 3 years she told me that she loves me crazy and she rly does bc i feel it how she talks to me and looks me and posts in social sites only love quotes. After a month trying to convice her that she is totaly wrong trying to have a relation with me, somehow i felt with her and went two times together. Now im in a bad situation bc i like her too. Im a religios Mann reading about Islam a lot but to stop with her is a big problem we work close to each other. She told me even that when making love with her husband thinks me at that moment. I hope someone can guide me how to convince her to stop cheating.

    May Allah (swt) guide us...
    Thnks in advance
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    NewMuslima's Avatar
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    Re: Cheating after Marriage

    This is very complicated but, what I can advice you is to seriously sit down and think what you want to do and the consequences. If you are ready to make changes and sure about what you want to do then go ahead with no fear. You need to be honest with yourself and with everyone else too. Don’t let anyone judge you from your mistakes. Ask for forgiveness and do what you have to do. But take responsibility as a father and have that special relationship with your child no matter what you decide. Good luck with everything.
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    Re: Cheating after Marriage

    Lol where do you work!!!

    ..if i farted at the wrong time bout ten people waiting round the corner for me! ..Ready to cash it in.

    You should break it off.. repent.

    Or take her as a wife.. which means her getting divorced..

    At the least.

    I dont know with which intention you live your life.

    ..in some places the punishment for adultery is the harshest..

    You should count your blessings and make amends.
    Last edited by M.I.A.; 10-13-2017 at 09:40 PM. Reason: ..oldest excuse in the book around these parts, he was talking to somebodies sister wrong.
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    Re: Cheating after Marriage

    The only thing i worked out there is that he is born in 2001
    Did i miss anything else ?
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    Amalalharbi's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: Cheating after Marriage

    If this woman were your wife or sister you would accept that this happens with her. If this woman were your daughter and she is married then you know that there is a married man who goes out with her, even if your daughter was wrong where you will go , you will go to the man who entered between your daughter and her husband and quarrel. If you do not like this to happen with your daughter, sister or your wife, you should love for the Muslim what do you love for yourself. Women are sometimes more emotional. Here a man must use his mind and not his passion . I think part of you like this think that why its began . don't blame other when you can make the different.
    masha Allah you have a wife and a blessing child say Alhamdullah . may Allah guide and help you .

    - - - Updated - - -

    If this woman were your wife or sister you would accept that this happens with her. If this woman were your daughter and she is married then you know that there is a married man who goes out with her, even if your daughter was wrong where you will go , you will go to the man who entered between your daughter and her husband and quarrel. If you do not like this to happen with your daughter, sister or your wife, you should love for the Muslim what do you love for yourself. Women are sometimes more emotional. Here a man must use his mind and not his passion . I think part of you like this think that why its began . don't blame other when you can make the different.
    masha Allah you have a wife and a blessing child say Alhamdullah . may Allah guide and help you .
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    Re: Cheating after Marriage

    Yup.. Still stuck on the 2001 part....
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    Re: Cheating after Marriage

    Alaikum Salam

    You doont need to convince her to stop cheating.She isnt cheating alone she is cheating with you.You stop and she will stop
    The solution to this is very simple.Start praying Salah,and go find a new job,as far as possible from this woman.In Germany is very easy to find a new job.
    shaytan got you twice,he may very easy cause you to cheat again and again,or even worse put you in this trap where this girl's passion for you will end and you will be left with a shattered family and the love for a married girl who you can not have.
    And share all your problems with Allah and your wife only.If she helped you solve problems in the past she can do that for your future problems too

    May Allah save you from temptations
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    Uno's Avatar Limited Member
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    Re: Cheating after Marriage

    In that area where im coming from going with Married wifes can be the reason to be killed easy... she is from the same country and same traditions.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Nope i was born 1991 now Im 26 and i meet my wife when I was 10 years old

    - - - Updated - - -

    Yeah I was thinking the same thing and rly good explained from you side my Brother. I went with Her bc sche is rly rly beautiful the only thing to stop Her first than me is to quit my Job. My Allah help us and stop from doing wrong steps.
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    Re: Cheating after Marriage

    Ameen.I am very happy that you know what a big mistake you did and you want to fix things.Wish you all the best brother
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    Re: Cheating after Marriage

    May Allah help you to take the best decision. Do not ever think about cheating your wife, it would destroy your whole life.
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    Re: Cheating after Marriage

    what do you mean by went 2 times together?
    Cheating after Marriage

    ┳┻|
    ┻┳|•.•) Hello, Assalamu Alaikum! Check out this topic for awesome rewards insha Allah! #makethechanges
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    Re: Cheating after Marriage

    format_quote Originally Posted by Cptn._.Mario View Post
    what do you mean by went 2 times together?
    Made Zinna 2 times
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    Re: Cheating after Marriage

    Dear Brother thank you for sharing this with us...I just wanted to say I'm sorry that you are in this bad situation. I see you have feelings for this Woman and I just wanted to ask you some questions. You said that this woman loves you and post love quot's and you think she's beautiful etc.. But you didn't tell how you feel about her? You say she love's you do you love her? I see you wrote that how can I stop her but clearly you are the confusing one here why don't you stop? Woman are indeed more emotional she must have a big reason why she fell for you brother. You said you were very close to each other can't you explain to her that you feel bad for cheating!? Does she feel bad? She is married too right? Is she going to divorce her Husband? And if yes would you Marry her? I see you don't know what to do but what makes you cheat on your wife? You did zinna 2 times which means the first time was good for both that's because you did it twice!!!! And who knows how many times you will do it again. Talk to her is she a believer as well? You can both repent and if you are true believers you can continue work together and stay good work college's and fear of All-llah will help you to forget about the mistakes you both did. If it's just passion than repent brother if it's love than take her as a wife or try to forget her but don't do mistake again think about the children think about God's anger. May All-llah help you and guide our steps and hope you solve your Problems.
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    Re: Cheating after Marriage

    alhamdulillah because you ask because of your fear of Allah and your loved of him
    the first thing to do is to make repentance from what you did
    than stop all the ways which can led you to her ... any thing her number and your work also
    because it harm you in your life and in your health too
    remember this because the chance for the women who is marring and yet have other relationships will be so strong to get a lot of health problems
    so tell this to yourself
    ask Allah .. pray and take your time in sujoud
    go to the mosque and Try to have a Muslim brothers
    may Allah make it easy for you ..
    amen!
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    Uno's Avatar Limited Member
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    Re: Cheating after Marriage

    THNKS my brother good explanation i whould take it in consideration. May Allah bless you

    - - - Updated - - -

    2 times zinna with her
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    'Abd-al Latif's Avatar Super Moderator
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    Re: Cheating after Marriage

    format_quote Originally Posted by Uno View Post
    Assalamualaikum

    Brothers and SistersIm a Muslem Guy 26 years from Ankara Turkey right now in Düsseldorf, married before 2 years ago and got a child now. Im with my wife since im 10, actualy 16 years with her together and im proud of it holding for so many years together. Im working in a company mixed Man and Woman i am very kind to the other wifes respekting them how a muslim rly schould. Im working here almost 4 years and i was having a good friendship (talking all problems to each other) with a woman in the same company she is 27 married too and got 2 childs. I saw her always looking me with a strange eye and after 3 years she told me that she loves me crazy and she rly does bc i feel it how she talks to me and looks me and posts in social sites only love quotes. After a month trying to convice her that she is totaly wrong trying to have a relation with me, somehow i felt with her and went two times together. Now im in a bad situation bc i like her too. Im a religios Mann reading about Islam a lot but to stop with her is a big problem we work close to each other. She told me even that when making love with her husband thinks me at that moment. I hope someone can guide me how to convince her to stop cheating.

    May Allah (swt) guide us...
    Thnks in advance
    How would you feel if your wife did this to you? How would you feel if this woman you're sleeping with becomes pregnant with your child and her husband finds out? Both of you are destroying your own families and the lives of your children. Your children will have no respect for you because this is not how a Muslim should ever behave.

    Leave this woman and change jobs to be away from her. Do not contact her or meet her ever again. You don't need to tell her to stop cheating YOU need to stop cheating!!!
    Last edited by 'Abd-al Latif; 10-16-2017 at 09:10 AM.
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    Cheating after Marriage

    And verily for everything that a slave loses there is a substitute, but the one who loses Allah will never find anything to replace Him.”
    [Related by Ibn al-Qayyim in ad-Dâ' wad-Dawâ Fasl 49]


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