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    Please regards me in this situation with my family (OP)


    Assalmu Alaykum
    I am going to start off saying I am not a perfect or a good muslim. I really am trying but it is hard. My family is a typical cultural/ moderate muslim family. They are not too liberal but they are like in between. Lot of its based of culture. I keep getting into arguments with my family sometimes small things then big things.

    First issue is that part of the reason I was not religous when young was because I was digusted by the Islam my father put off. Hitting kids, humilation, I have the right to beat you, etc, kick you out, all that nonsense. When I later learned true Islam, I later realized that is not what Islam was about. My father is not exactly the best. He is not the worst but he definetly is at fault many times. Sometimes he gives me chores, that is capable of doing but he puts it on me. He does not respect me and sees me as a servant, as He is customed to having servants from back home. He is lazy and not working but as a result in anger, In spite I do not do the chores. Obviously I acknowledge that is my own stupidity, but He gets on my nerves. I try my best to avoid so I do not sin and argue but I end up doing. Today literally first thing in the morning he gave me a chore right when I woke up. I didn't feeling like doing it, so I did not do it. He called me swear words which made me more angry and I ended up doing the chore in order to please my mother. When my mother gives me a chore, Im lazy but feel doing it because my mother doesnt treat me like father. When he calls me names or treats me ill, Am I allowed to stand up for myself? At times I speak loudly and shout. But I never say any bad words. I am not perfect but would like to know, as I have limits.

    Next thing is in my culture, money and sucess is everything apparently. So my mother says she will not get me married until I am successful. I told her I am not waiting too long for another 2 years. As a result I ended up getting in another arguemnt. THis was because my brother said is ready to marry, but my mother is not making any efforts to look for a spouse for him. I told her, if you wont find one for him, how will you find one for me? My father is careless and insists that when times comes, Allah will magically bring a girl before us. Rasool SAW said we have to make efforts too. Every time I voice my concern, my father makes fun of me and treats as a joke. My family makes marriage jokes. I then asked the imam's opinion, only it backfired at me because he now makes fun of me in front of strangers, and stupid marraige jokes. Every where I am a joke. My grandmother says no one will marry a crazy immature person like you. Once I finish my exam, I will be able to be successful inshallah, But even then my mother inists on waiting. At times , they make it difficult and say if you dont know this thing or this thing...how will you survive a marriage. They say because I want to get married, I am expected to know everything. They say my wife will walk out the first day. Then when I get upset, they call me fake muslim. Im tired of being accused of hypocricy. Committing sin is easy and getting haram relationship, But I fear Allah which is why I never want to go to that stuff with Allah's help. It is why I am open and discussed it my family. I am trying my best to be a good muslim, yet at times I fail.

    Please tell me what to do? Am in the right or wrong? How can I fix this? Will I go to hell because of my family?
    I do not understand why it is easier for evil people to get married just like that and destroy lives, while those who seek to keep themselves away from haram, suffer. What is the wisdom of this?
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    Re: Please regards me in this situation with my family

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    Jazakallah Khayran. May Allah bless you in both worlds. I will try inshallah


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