I don't know if what I'm doing is wrong.. Because of the culture I have grown up in and been conditioned to, I have certain standards of what I think is attractive in a man.. I've toned down standards after maturing.. but even then..
When I want to get married, I want a husband who is very religious which I have very high standards on that.. This itself is already hard enough to find around here. But on top of that, I am very picky with physical attractiveness. I'm trying to just find someone who is at least a little attractive. but the problem is that "a little attractive" is not so easy for me to find in most men, I get put off by looks very easily and I am extremelyyyy picky.. I get very put off by beards especially. And I know men are supposed to grow out beards
I feel bad because as soon as I may find a religious good suitor, I cant bear seeing myself with him because of the way he looks. And I don't know how to even turn someone down because I think they are un attractive. It makes me feel bad. I just make up some kind of excuse.
I think I may end up being single because of this. Is this wrong? Sometimes I just want to stay single because I don't want to end up being agitated with my partner over something so shallow.
On top of that, I dress like the orthodox strict way so it is hard for others to see if they are interested in my beauty..
please tell me what you think. I want to get married and fill half my deen but this holds me down and I might end up getting old and single so I may not find someone. I don't mean to be shallow either, its just how I am. I've tried compromising physical beauty but it drives me crazy
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I don't know if what I'm doing is wrong.. Because of the culture I have grown up in and been conditioned to, I have certain standards of what I think is attractive in a man.. I've toned down standards after maturing.. but even then..
When I want to get married, I want a husband who is very religious which I have very high standards on that.. This itself is already hard enough to find around here. But on top of that, I am very picky with physical attractiveness. I'm trying to just find someone who is at least a little attractive. but the problem is that "a little attractive" is not so easy for me to find in most men, I get put off by looks very easily and I am extremelyyyy picky.. I get very put off by beards especially. And I know men are supposed to grow out beards
I feel bad because as soon as I may find a religious good suitor, I cant bear seeing myself with him because of the way he looks. And I don't know how to even turn someone down because I think they are un attractive. It makes me feel bad. I just make up some kind of excuse.
I think I may end up being single because of this. Is this wrong? Sometimes I just want to stay single because I don't want to end up being agitated with my partner over something so shallow.
On top of that, I dress like the orthodox strict way so it is hard for others to see if they are interested in my beauty..
please tell me what you think. I want to get married and fill half my deen but this holds me down and I might end up getting old and single so I may not find someone. I don't mean to be shallow either, its just how I am. I've tried compromising physical beauty but it drives me crazy
salaams having a beard is such a manly thing a guy can do,
maybe its the way the guy grooms his beard?
remember once your marrie dyou can get him to groom his beard lol!
It will changed
Especially for beard
Me and my sister was like that one day
And now we feel like no handsomely without beard we do say like many women that men without beard is is not attractive
And now her husband have beard and she is happy with him
So , you will see after a while how you will see the things differently
Just give your self time
But dont merry someone who you don't like ... because this will cause for you and him so many problems
May allah help u to get the right spouse
Ameeen
A bit contradictory because how do you want a religious man but dislike beards?
The important thing with marriage is that yes there should be a certain level of attraction but ultimately looks fade. If you want a happy long lasting marriage, you need to look for what’s within. A person with a good heart.
Sister please don’t listen to these dumb responses wallahi they all sound very jealous and insecure and fragile. Allah will give you whatever you ask for as long as it’s halal and you make dua and pray for it. I do not think you are shallow for wanting an attractive husband. Husband and wife need to have intercourse with each other if they want to stay chaste but how will you do that if you aren’t physically attracted to him. They say you are living in delusion but in reality they are the ones who are doing so. You need to have the full package in order for the marriage to work. Also it’s funny how they claim handsome guys will cheat but I’ve never seen that happen practically it’s always ugly men who do that especially when they are poor because they never got the opportunity. Handsome men know they can get attention therefore they will less likely desire it because it’s not special to them. Ask Allah and inshallah you will find a very good looking spouse who treats you right. Ameen
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