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Help needed

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    RevertTayra's Avatar Full Member
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    Dear brothers and sisters, assalamu alaykum,


    I'm a constant revert. I don't have jamma here where I live, and then I fall into shaytan's traps very often. Before I used to be living totally different life and I never told anyone that I became Muslima because here in my country Muslims are mostly primitive and uneducated and also I constantly fall in traps and do sins and then I go back to Islam, and so on...

    My fallings last for couple of days or weeks, then I go back to Allah, and this is constant. Last time I fell, I started relationship with non-Muslim. Then Allah gave me very strong hardships, because I stopped doing salaat, and started doing other sins and was very ungrateful. I was on edge of killing myself, but I didn't... This man took care of me in every sense - emotionally, financially, etc. Then I got back to Islam and very firmly this time. Alhamdulillah, there's no zina. This man comes to my place, and nothing happens in sense of zina. Then he wakes up and leaves until night, so I manage to pray all 5 salaat.

    The reason why I'm not leaving him is because he took care of me for months and a lot. He spent a lot of money on me, he fed me, he was taking care of me while sick... When I repented to Allah and started really doing all my best to be as good as possible with deen, my life turned totally positive. And now, if I'd tell him - you see, I'm a Muslim and have to break up with you, because you're not, then I might present very bad picture of Islam and Islam is already badly presented here with behavior of many Muslims.

    There's another thing. Once, we had a meal and he said alhamdulillah and I was a little shocked. He used to say: I'm going to convert to Islam, but here many people make fun of Islam even in that sense, when they say some things like this, including MashaAllah, inshaAllah etc. I started observing him and he never seemed to be making fun of it, but I'm not sure. Once, at my place he saw a book about Prophet saws and he said: I would love to read this book.

    I know that Allah knows best, but what if he's secretly thinking of Islam and converting but for a similar reason to mine, he's keeping it secret?

    I'm very bad with dawah... But, what do you think? Since, there's no zina... Should I try to make dawah somehow with Allah's help? I also found that he likes Muslims...

    I'm hoping that there are smart and wise brothers and sisters here who could give me good advice
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    Hamza Asadullah's Avatar Moderator
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    Re: Help needed

    format_quote Originally Posted by RevertTayra View Post
    Dear brothers and sisters, assalamu alaykum,


    I'm a constant revert. I don't have jamma here where I live, and then I fall into shaytan's traps very often. Before I used to be living totally different life and I never told anyone that I became Muslima because here in my country Muslims are mostly primitive and uneducated and also I constantly fall in traps and do sins and then I go back to Islam, and so on...

    My fallings last for couple of days or weeks, then I go back to Allah, and this is constant. Last time I fell, I started relationship with non-Muslim. Then Allah gave me very strong hardships, because I stopped doing salaat, and started doing other sins and was very ungrateful. I was on edge of killing myself, but I didn't... This man took care of me in every sense - emotionally, financially, etc. Then I got back to Islam and very firmly this time. Alhamdulillah, there's no zina. This man comes to my place, and nothing happens in sense of zina. Then he wakes up and leaves until night, so I manage to pray all 5 salaat.

    The reason why I'm not leaving him is because he took care of me for months and a lot. He spent a lot of money on me, he fed me, he was taking care of me while sick... When I repented to Allah and started really doing all my best to be as good as possible with deen, my life turned totally positive. And now, if I'd tell him - you see, I'm a Muslim and have to break up with you, because you're not, then I might present very bad picture of Islam and Islam is already badly presented here with behavior of many Muslims.

    There's another thing. Once, we had a meal and he said alhamdulillah and I was a little shocked. He used to say: I'm going to convert to Islam, but here many people make fun of Islam even in that sense, when they say some things like this, including MashaAllah, inshaAllah etc. I started observing him and he never seemed to be making fun of it, but I'm not sure. Once, at my place he saw a book about Prophet saws and he said: I would love to read this book.

    I know that Allah knows best, but what if he's secretly thinking of Islam and converting but for a similar reason to mine, he's keeping it secret?

    I'm very bad with dawah... But, what do you think? Since, there's no zina... Should I try to make dawah somehow with Allah's help? I also found that he likes Muslims...

    I'm hoping that there are smart and wise brothers and sisters here who could give me good advice
    Assalamu Alaikum.

    Sister you must tell him that you must seperate from him until he accepts Islam and then you can do the Nikah as it is forbidden for you to be in close proximity to a non Muslim and non mahram. This is also because shaythan is the third person in your private interactions with him which is even worse if you are with him in person.

    If you are not able to help him research into Islam then contact your local Masjids/Islamic centres and get them in touch with him so that someone more knowledgeable can help him research Islam and answer any questions he may have.

    Also do not despair because if we sacrifice that which is stepping over the limits and boundaries set by Allah and therefore will cause us harm, then Allah will open many other doors for you. So put your trust, faith and reliance in him and him alone.

    Ask of him in the latter part of the night at Tahajjud time to help you with your situation. Contact your local Masjids/Islam centres for support for new reverts like yourself as many do provide such support. They will also be able to put you in touch with sisters who will be able to help you and even befriend you.

    If you need anything else then please do not hesitate to ask.
    Help needed

    How to get through Hardships & trials in life:

    https://www.islamicboard.com/advice-...mp-trials.html

    How to overcome Waswas (insinuating whispers of shaythan) in Worship:

    https://www.islamicboard.com/advice-...d-worship.html

    10 Steps to Increasing Imaan & getting closer to Allah:

    https://www.islamicboard.com/manners...d-version.html

    https://www.islamicboard.com/manners...ser-allah.html
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