my dads died.... what can i do?

its very sad to hear this.
may Allah (Swt) make your life easy Amin

Mazed, that's a beautiful picture, but it's lenght is kind of screwing up this thread making it quite challenging to read it

Sister Lilly
Please be patient. I know it's hard. I've lost my father to a couple years ago. I know, it's devastating. I wish I could give you some advice, on what to do. But there's not really a lot you can do. This is just one of the facts of life that we need to accept. Just make dua for him, that is the best gift you can give him. Remember that death is just a veil, to make the master plan less obvious for those who are left behind. So pray that your father might be granted jannah, and inshallah you'll see eachother again there. And now it might sem like far away, but once your there (inshallah) it will seem like you have been apart but for a second. Remember how blessed you are with the guidance and knowledge Allah has given you. While he leads others astray, he led you to the path of guidance. Why? Because it was known that you would apreciate that guidance, and accept it. Because it was known that you would be thankfull towards it. you can't comit suicide. Even if you'd want to, it's not an option. You have to accept the path that Allah has laid out for you and finish the rest of the exam. Why would you exchange the hardships of this world for etenral hardship? Remind yourself of the moment you first took your shahada. Remember how it felt? I still remmeber it like it was yesterday. Be patient. you are among the blessed ones. Allah will not forsake you inshallah. Pray and make dua. Inshallah you will be answered.

May Allah guide you through your hardships and keep you on the straight path; and may he grant your father jannah inshallah.

As for the pain that insists...
People will tell you time will heal it. I'm gonna be honest with you. They are wrong. Time will not heal the wound. My father passed away, and it still hurts. And some people might think I should be over it by now. But you know what I 've come to realise? That it's actually a good thing! I wouldn't want to forget my father. He will inshallah always stay close to my heart. And that means it will always hurt that we are seperated. so no matter how much ime passes by, it still hurts. What time does do, is make it easyer to bare that pain. The more you come to accept the way it is, the more you come to understand why things happened in the way they did, the more bearable the pain will become inshallah. I know that that might not be a lot help to you right now, but this is the best I can do. May Allah make your pain more bearable inshallah.

Sis, why are they blaming u for his death? u obviously didnt kill him so why are they blaming u?

Allah swt only tests those whom he loves n he obviously loves u loads, just be patienct as Allah swt is with those who are patient.

Also sis, what shelter are u living in? where are u from, inshallah we can sort some accomodation out for u.

this is one of the saddest threads i've seen.
i can tell you nothing.
at least it is good that you have a child to live for - this will pull you through.
i will remember you in my prayers (i'm doing a bit more of that these days, anyway).
may god help you to heal from this awful pain.

ohh sister, please understand that this is a trial from Allah swt, remmeber the life of this world will pass quickly but the hereafter will last forever. i know it is really hard for you, i have had a similar experiance, i know you have what it takes to be a good muslimah submmiting to Allah swt. inshallah you do well.

great to hear sis mashalah, inshalah it works out smoothly inshalah

our duas with you! all the best,

take care salamz

I don't know if anyone can understand death unless dealing with it first hand... I have lost my uncle, then my aunt a year of each other... then my best friend, then both my grandmothers within 3 months of each other... It has been a personal hell at best... I can't say I found solace in anything, prayers or fast or reading Quran, or writing poetry.. I wanted to lock myself up from the world and I did for quite sometime actually I didn't want people to comfort me because none of them knew how...any word or sentence would bring me to tears... I never told anyone about my friend who passed away and I never really had closure... to this day I think of a different ending or different things I could have said or done just to appease my soul... it is a depressing indescribable feeling... I was in complete state of anhedonia I suspect that is what you are feeling... I wish I can comfort you... I don't know if words will mean anything right now... just remember the affair of the Muslim is a wondrous thing... if he is hurt and is patient he is rewarded... if he is blessed and thankful he is rewarded.... sometimes it is a drag to get out of bed I know... you think well what is the point? what do I have to live for... but know that you matter to the one who created you... you matter to your new born baby...you matter to your friends and family... you matter to the new friends you have made on this forum and with all of it comes responsibility... just look into your baby's eyes and remember that you must stay strong... you are responsible for all those people and most importantly responsible for yourself... engage yourself with people who care for you... I know this probably means nothing to you right now but what your family is doing to you is expected adjustment disorder with persons who are unable to deal with stress or grieve look for an easy target to receive their lashing while they adjust might even go as far as blaming you for someone's death which is absurd... it isn't fair to you as he was your father, you converting doesn't make you love him any less than they do and you are allowed to grieve for him as much as they are... Many people look for an easy answer by drawing some satisfaction from simplistic conclusions... That isn't your problem but theirs.... Sister my advise is to seek some grief counseling with a Muslim psychiatrist who may be able to work with you to not only grieve but understand all these emotions that you are overcome with... and secondly to take it one day at a time... one hour at a time ... one minute at a time... Time is God's gift to heal those gaping wounds... if I can help you in any way shape or form please PM me...

Lilly-Rose

How are you doing, girl?

format_quote Originally Posted by lilly_rose

am doing fine

That's good!

How is your family? Have they worked through some of their grief and have they changed their attitude towards you?

And how are you coping without your dad?

I'll pray for you sister!