help

[cimira]

salaam. i am in desperate need of some guidance. i have committed a really bad sin, which i am deeply ashamed of. i was deeply upset and hurt by the actions of someone i love and in anger i touched the quran and made a quran ni kasam that i would never go bak 2 there life and that they would never hear from me. unfortunately this person is a boy i am in love with. once i calmed down i realised that i stil wanted to talk 2 him and i should never hav picked a kasam as i am someone who strongly disagrees with doing so. i know it is wrong of me to have feelings for this boy. so what i would like to know is if i will be forgiven for making such a kasam and will i ever be able to talk to this boy, because i do not want to break a kasam i made by touching the quran. please help.

[Khaldun]

:sl:

First of all are you married to this brother? If not then you should be more worried about your relationship with him then making a kasam touching the Quran.

I am not judging you please dont get me wrong, yet first of all you have to get your priorities right, you seem like a clever sister.

[cimira]

salaam.
thank you fr replying, i understan what you are saying, i am not mrried to this boy, and becase i was worried about the type of relationship i had with him, i picked that kasam so that i would not be tempted to keep a relationship with this boy in th wrong manner. i really wnt to do the right thing. i have performed istikarah asking allah for guidance about whether this persn wud b a good partner for me in life. i have had sum dreams but i dont know who to ask in regards to the meaning of these dreams.

[------]

:salamext:

Ask a scholar here.

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[cimira]

salaam, i did only want it to be viewed by staff. how would i change my status name as i put my real name and i want to change it.

[cimira]

i have been on that site but when ever i go to ask a question it always says that they have reached their limit of questions.

[cimira]

salaams does anybody know if there is anyone i can ask regardin meanings of dreams seen after performing istikarah?

[------]

:salamext:

"It is not at all necessary for a person to have visions or dreams following Istikharah. However, if a person does experience a vision or dream, and he feels strongly about it, he should follow it.”

http://www.islamicboard.com/advice-s...-guidance.html

[islamirama]

:sl:

You cannot take kassam (swear, oath) by anything other than Allah. Not by the Quran, not by your mother's head or anything else for that matter.

Establishing any relationship with a stranger of the opposite sex is unlawful in Islam and may lead to fornication.

Our religion has determined the lawful relations between males and females and prepared for them the reasons which would offer them happiness. Islam has confined all such relationships to marriage.

Allah forbids any relationship between a man and woman outside the marital relationship. We are, in fact, ordered in the Qur’ân to lower even our gaze from the opposite sex, so how can we manage to go further and chat with the opposite sex, exchange gifts, and have such an intimate relationship as a love relationship. We are not even to go so far as look at the opposite sex unnecessarily.

Allah says: “Say to the believing men that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty. That will make for greater purity for them, and Allah is acquainted with all that they do. And say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty…” [Sûrah al-Nûr: 30-31]

The only credible love relationship between man and woman is between a husband and wife.

The love relationship between a man and woman before marriage or outside of marriage is unlawful. It has disastrous affects on people, families and the society as a whole. It is the easiest way to fall into the sin of adultery.

The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “A man is never alone with a woman but Satan will be the third of them.” [Sunan al-Tirmidhî]

[cimira]

but what happens when you really want to marry this person but your family disagrees? so your trying to do the right thing but no 1 lets u!

[Lonely Gal]

can I ask how old u are?

[Lonely Gal]

Why is your family disagreeing?
How long have you known him?
Did your family find out that something is going on between u 2??

[IbnAbdulHakim]

if you love someone before marriage then be patient and if Allaah wills you may marry him BUT DO NOT HOPE FOR THIS and if Allaah wills you will get better.

For your patience you will definitly be rewarded.


Remember most relationships are only ever fruitful when under the guidance of islaam, dont think for one second you will have a beautiful relationship which lasts for eternity (IE in jannah) unless... you approach it the halal way.


so my advice, you love someone? if your CAPABLE and his CAPABLE (ie earning and mature) and your both ready then get married, or stay faar faar away and fear Allaah !!


Assalamu Alaikum

[cimira]

im 22

[cimira]

i went to school with this guy, i have known him 4 many years. my family disagreed because he is not educated and they think he is not capable of lukin afta me, and yes they found out from sum1 else that sumthin was goin on between us. u c i am someone who is so afraid of marraige but this person has made me feel that it wud b the right thing.

[*KB*]

:salamext:

Ask a scholar here.

Assalamualaykum

Not meaning to be offensive or rude to Sister cimira as i'm going a bit off topic but (this is directed at Sister -Serene- Do you know who controls that website? Who is behind the website? I have been told by one of my cousins to watch out for websites like that incase they are handled by Non-muslims whose intentions are bad.

Just wanting to know whether you, Sister -Serene-, know this as I'm just making sure for yours and our safety. :statisfie:)

Assalamualaykum
*KB*
:coolious:

[*KB*]

Assalamualaykum

Sister cimira in your situation I do not really know what to say except for this relationship with this guy is wrong. My strongest advice would be to make Dua to Allah and ask for forgiveness. What Allah decides and makes happen, happens for a reason.

I will make dua that everything goes alright for you. :)

Assalamualaykum
*KB*
:coolious:

Stay safe Sister

[IbnAbdulHakim]

Assalamualaykum

Not meaning to be offensive or rude to Sister cimira as i'm going a bit off topic but (this is directed at Sister -Serene- Do you know who controls that website? Who is behind the website? I have been told by one of my cousins to watch out for websites like that incase they are handled by Non-muslims whose intentions are bad.

Just wanting to know whether you, Sister -Serene-, know this as I'm just making sure for yours and our safety. :statisfie:)

Assalamualaykum
*KB*
:coolious:

mashaAllaah lol


but ukhtee the site is under the supervision of sheikh salman al oadah, so its safe inshaAllaah, jizakAllaah khair for the concern !



Assalamu Alaikum wa Rahmatullaah

[*KB*]

Assalamualaykum

Ya Akhi! How embarassing!!!! :statisfie::statisfie::statisfie::statisfie:

Assalamualaykum
*KB*
:coolious:

[Tania]

i went to school with this guy, i have known him 4 many years. my family disagreed because he is not educated and they think he is not capable of lukin afta me, and yes they found out from sum1 else that sumthin was goin on between us. u c i am someone who is so afraid of marraige but this person has made me feel that it wud b the right thing.

The older over here says its much better if both have the same education, because in time you can have lot of disagreement. You will not speak the same language, certain habits of his will annoy you and so on.

[cimira]

thankyou