Is it considered wrong...

[Lonely Gal]

My mum and dad won't take money from me cos they believe its not right to take money from their daughters, esp youngest... I feel bad and want to help financially so I often put money in places that they keep money so that they don't realise that I have given it and that way will take it and use.. Is this bad cos I'm not telling them I have put the money there, and is it bad that I have not listened and still giving money to them.

[IbnAbdulHakim]

Allahu A'lam


sis is there a mufti in your locality that perhaps you can ask?

this sounds like a very fiqhi question.


sorry that we couldnt be of help

Assalamu Alaikum


ps: jizakAllaah khair, if i was in your position i would just be very firm in my insistence of them taking my money.

If your married then its understandable why they act like that, they know you might need it too.
InshaAllah best thing is make dua' for them... about your question ... sry... ask a scholar inshaAllaah

[------]

:salamext:

That's what most Asians believe, Allaahu Aalim sis.

[crayon]

edit- i misunderstood, nevermind...

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[------]

:salamext:

Actually I found a Fatwa for you; (well sort of)

Do parents have any rights to the wealth of a married daughter?

[IbnAbdulHakim]

the fiqhi stuff comes in when her parents have commanded that she not give them money.

Obeying parents is fard, so i would strongly say ask a scholar!

this is not a normal situation that you can get a fatwa of another person. the above fatwa isnt completely suitable for your situation as they have forbidden you to give money to them.


i would ask a scholar inshaAllaah


remember Allah creates every situation for a reason! theres hikmah behind everything, consult a scholar for the grey area's inshaAllaah

[Lonely Gal]

thanks, my bros are too selfish and don't realise they need to give money and I know my parents could do with some, but each time I offer they do not accept so I have to give it in a way they do not know...

[------]

:salamext:

@IAH ^ This is why I said sort of....

[IbnAbdulHakim]

thanks, my bros are too selfish and don't realise they need to give money and I know my parents could do with some, but each time I offer they do not accept so I have to give it in a way they do not know...

personally if i KNEW my father would be "ANGRY" had he known i am giving him money rather then happy, i wouldnt do it.


this is just personal, your whole situation sounds very personal.

why dont you give your brothers money to give to your parents? wont that work?

[Lonely Gal]

they wudnt get majorly angry but they wud be like no take it bak kinda thing..
well surely thats cheating them as well, as it would be my money that my bros are claiming to be theirs?

[------]

:salamext:

Have u asked them if they will take it?

Ask a scholar here inshaAllaah;

[IbnAbdulHakim]

^ this is all too fiqhi..

it does sound like they would be hurt/mind if you gave them money.

how about you buy stuff for them that they would buy with that money?

maybe that would be better, personally i would hate it if my sister gave me money... hek i even hate it when she gives back money i lent to her, but if she baught me stuff instead i wouldnt mind.

like do the shopping for them and stuff? cant you do that?


Assalamu Alaikum

[Lonely Gal]

yeh I do, do that, but I feel that's not enough...

[Lonely Gal]

limit has been reached today..

[------]

:salamext:

No worries keep trying inshaAllaah =)

[Umar001]

What about explaining to them? Like, that their provisions are written and that there is no shame in your giving them money and that they looked after you and you want to earn some good deeds and they should let you earn the good deeds and so forth

[AvarAllahNoor]

I'd say you were considerate, take a look around kids these days don't care about parents. Assist them wit the groceries, or maybe cook food for them and take it to them. This way, it's not seen as bad by them. I'd continue contributing, what's the point of having kids, if they can't help parents when the MOST NEED IT! :)

[Malaikah]

:sl:

How about instead of giving them money, buy them stuff they need? They won't refuse a gift, will they?

[Lonely Gal]

they need to pay for my 2 bros weddin, later this yr.. they are financially stuck, so i offered to give them as much as they need 5/10 k but they say no, how are we going to repay u etc, i sed u dnt have to but they go no we aint takin it... so i said pay it back when u have it but they still wont take it..
they need not struggle wen i have the money, but they dont listen to me .. and i have to watch them struggle.. so have to give money in ways i find i only can

[AvarAllahNoor]

Why can't the brothers pay? how old are they? do they work?

[IbnAbdulHakim]

expensive weddings causing grief again...


solution is so simple yet no one wants to compromise their pride.


just have a cheap wedding lol....

[------]

:salamext:

^ Simple Sunnah wedding - lots of Barakah :D

[Lonely Gal]

thats fine but not only weddins but generally my parents dont wrk so where will money come from.. bro are selfish as mentioned before.. they dnt realise.. they work and spend as they like..

[IbnAbdulHakim]

^ tell ur parents to tell em they gonna be paying for their own weddings.


simple