format_quote Originally Posted by
'Abd-al Latif
That's not what I meant, infact that's far from it. I meant as much as one wants to make their wife happy theres is always a limit to what one can do. In Islam the mother has the highest right over her children to be treated with kindness. However the husband is also the protector of his wife so when things turn bad between the mother and wife the man has to bear the brunt of it.
The wife isn't expected to solve the problem. Rather it would be better for her to be patient and give it some time. Same goes for the mother.
Usually these problems arise due to cultural differences, thus the wife, husband and mother all expect the problem to be solved through culture and not Islam. The Islamic perspective offers the best solution for everyone but people become impatient and become hasty in their actions which leads to more undesired results.
Dear Brother
I totally agree with you and your words but unfortunately putting that into action somehow seems so much difficult in reality for some muslims that is quite sad and unbelievable,
Plus i find that the more the wife tries with some old women there is just no winning, old age seems to get the best of them and they become nothing but crooky old nagging evil hags with too many screws loose in the head.
culture comes more of a bigger part in reality sadly than religion does,
let me give you an example, in pakistani households ( majority of them) the mother is the queen of the house, the father usually is the chilled out laid back practising muslim whilst the mother is the dominant one in control of everything.
Now i guess pakistanis are just brought up and conditioned that way cos when the son gets married then it carries on, if he gets married to a fellow pakistani sister who has been broght up in that environment and conditioned in that manner through her upbringing and takes on that role. Now if the guy goes ahead and gets married to a woman from a different ethnic background and culture, and has been brought up differently then that cycle is broken and and there is major problems with the mother in law who always tries to interfere and dominate the son and make the wife's life a living hell!
shouldnt be happening according to islam, but this is REAL life and your believes may be as a good muslim to follow the islamic way and the right way, but your not the problem how you going to get the mother in law to stop, you cannot force it down her throat!!!