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iliketosmile99
06-27-2008, 11:52 PM
A friend of mine that I have known since I was very little, and who has basically been an older brother for me reccently tried to overdose. Luckily, he got to the hospital in time, and they put him in ICU. He's still in the hospital, but out of ICU and doing ok, physically.

It scared me so badly when I found out, though, because he has an almost 2-year-old son that I look after often, who's mother is a drug-addict and hardly pays attention to him. I hate seeing kids left alone like that. Plus, I didn't find out until he got out of ICU, which was a few days after he overdosed, because no one in school was allowed to talk about it (I go to a tiny school of 100 people in the whole school, so if someone was talking about it, a teacher would definitely find out). So basically, no one told me why he hadn't called or e-mailed me for days, when he usually talks to me every day.

I might go visit him at the hospital, but here's the really hard part: I don't know what to say to him. I've been praying so hard that he'll be fine and that Allah will give me the right words, but I'm just not sure. I have really poor social skills, and situations like this make me feel incredibly awkward, and I just don't know what to say to him!

Help, anyone?
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snakelegs
06-28-2008, 07:10 AM
wow - so sad. when i was young i also had a friend you tried many times to kill herself.

all i can think of is to tell him how you felt when you heard the news, how concerned you are. share your feelings honestly.
and listen. mostly listen.

if it's ok islamically, tell him that you care about him very much as a friend (as well as the father of the son that you look after sometimes and care about also)and will always be there to listen if he wants to talk/e-mail.

sometimes it's so hard to find words and it's just better to describe your feelings.
always it's best to listen.
i hope he will get some help and make it through the darkness.
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Eric H
06-28-2008, 02:37 PM
Greetings and peace be with you iliketosmile99;

Life is a struggle for all of us, even when things are going well. Snakelegs mentioned the word listen four times; we have two ears and one mouth which means we should listen at least twice as much as we talk.

The more you are silent the more he may feel compelled to talk, if there are long periods of silence it is a chance to pray.

The things that he says will be far more important than the things you can say, because he is the one suffering. It is for you to listen intently and to search for the meaning of what he says.

You face a daunting task, maybe there is the need to hand over all your problems to Allah, pray for him and put your trust in Allah.

In the spirit of praying for a peace that surpasses all understanding.

Eric
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IbnAbdulHakim
06-28-2008, 02:44 PM
what can you do other then make lots of dua' and take care of their child for them?...
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06-28-2008, 03:21 PM
:salamext:

Show this to him InshaaAllaah;

http://www.islamicboard.com/fiqh/134...t-way-out.html
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AvarAllahNoor
06-28-2008, 08:19 PM
Waheguru Rakha (God is the Protector)

Sorry to hear this. It's sad. I was reading that youth are opting to take thier own lives. Wales hs had wuit a few deaths.

You need to ask him why he's tried this. Surely nothing can be that bad that you consider taking your own life. It's short as it is without people reducing it. But, thn I don't know his reason behind t. Ask him, and helphim out. May Allah bring peace into his life.
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