I am such a failure arghh, just want to cry

[AnonymousPoster]

I just completed a whole year at Uni and I hate really hate my degree!

I am going to quit, go back to college then re apply for a Law degree.

I am really scared about my family reaction, I am not a little girl anymore, I am 20 now they will be very annoyed plus I might not get into law and thats when I will be extremely depressed.

I feel like a failure:cry:
Should I stick to this course which I hate..but would make everyone happy
Or go for Law which is my dream but knowing that I might not be clever enough.

This is really stressing me to the point where is affecting my physically.:cry:

I come from a strict family as well btw.

[Muhammad]

Thread Approved.

[Brother_Mujahid]

I come from a strict family as well btw.

that has nothing to do with the price of fish. if anything they should be more understanding to what you want.

what degree is it you do. were you forced into doing it.

Law which is my dream but knowing that I might not be clever enough.

its nothing to do with who is clever and not, any one who works hard enough and puts the time in will succeeed and do well inshallah

[BlissfullyJaded]

:sl:

Why wouldn't your family approve of you studying law..? 20 isn't that old to turn around and decide to get a degree in something totally different. It would be a lot better than working in a field you totally don't like for 10 years and resenting it every minute.

If you managed to study something you hated and complete you degree in it, I'm pretty certain you'd be smart enough to get through law school inshaAllah. Don't put yourself down. You never know if you'll get into law if you don't apply. If that is where your passion lies, then go for it, and make sincere dua that you get accepted.

Hey there! Looks like you're enjoying the discussion, but you're not signed up for an account.

When you create an account, you can participate in the discussions and share your thoughts. You also get notifications, here and via email, whenever new posts are made. And you can like posts and make new friends.
Sign Up

[Brother_Mujahid]

How about..... you continue to do your degree as a back up.

2 things you can do...

1) phone/e-mail/contact admissions tutors at realistic universities you wish to go to and tell them the situation your in... i.e wish to do law and what you currently are doing. im sure they will be helpful enough to direct you to what it is best to do in order to get on the law degree. whether its going back to do A-lvls etc they could also accept you as a mature student... Its best to speak to the admissions tutor for law in any case.

2)Try phoning around unis on clearing day when the A-lvl results come out and see if you can get on the course.

hope this helps

your career advising bro.

[AnonymousPoster]

:sl:

that has nothing to do with the price of fish. if anything they should be more understanding to what you want.

what degree is it you do. were you forced into doing it.

My family had they hope of me being a midwife but I realised is not for me I just hate it.

If you managed to study something you hated and complete you degree in it, I'm pretty certain you'd be smart enough to get through law school inshaAllah.

Jawrah I am 20 I have to back to college for a year to improve my grades then go to Uni, I will start Uni when I am 21 to them is heartbreaking this is when I should be finished.

Quick update my mum cursed me I am dead to her, I am starting to think maybe I should just stick with this dont get me wrong I hate it and I will go down the route of severe depression and regret but is better than seeing my mum suffer she is not feeling well anyways got health problem and I am not helping.

This is so hard.:cry:

[anonymous]

I just completed a whole year at Uni and I hate really hate my degree!

I am going to quit, go back to college then re apply for a Law degree.

I am really scared about my family reaction, I am not a little girl anymore, I am 20 now they will be very annoyed plus I might not get into law and thats when I will be extremely depressed.

I feel like a failure:cry:
Should I stick to this course which I hate..but would make everyone happy
Or go for Law which is my dream but knowing that I might not be clever enough.

This is really stressing me to the point where is affecting my physically.:cry:

I come from a strict family as well btw.

chill sis, u gta do wat YOU wna do not wat ya parents want u 2do... but MAKE SURE UR 10000000%%%% SURE b4u quit

i was exactly like you- i QUIT in ma 2nd yr of my degree- but then after exploring my options i realised that the course which i tried SO hard 2 get on in d first place was THE ryt 1 4 me... so alhamdulillah even tho id officially quit i managed to get bak on d course n pik up wer i left off. n MAN was it d best decisio i ever made- now 2 years on Iv jus graduated :shade::shade::shade::shade::shade: gt ma results the other day ALHAMDULILLAHHHHH was so happyyyyyy and also i seciured maself a job ages ago-!!! sop think carefully hun b4 u do owt u myt regret l8a

but do wats best 4 YOU n not wats best 4 ev1 else!!!! dats THE BEST ADVICE i can giv ya

gud luk hun

ps HOW ARE U A FAILURE!!>>>>??? It is NOT EASY to get on a degree course, u shud PAT yaself on d bak 4 gettin wer ya at now, dats mashaAllah wikd in itself!!

[Tania]

You can't follow both :? To have 2 degrees would not be so bad :)

[Brother_Mujahid]

My family had they hope of me being a midwife but I realised is not for me I just hate it.

its an excellent course!

you get to help others with their quality of life, and could possibly save lives! :coolalien

ifffffff you really want to go for the law degree have a look at what i posted before about talking to the admissions tutor. if its necessary to go back to college then it'll have to be that route if thats what you wish.

[AnonymousPoster]

:sl:
I decided to just stay in the course, I am not going to lie law is like my passion but when I look at the facts is better for me to stick to midwifery, decent pay, no debts and a secure job with law i am just gambling it all.

My mum was so devasted but i spoke to her i do feel like i was emotionally blackmailed but Isha Allah i hope things work out, my decision to stay on the course is mostly for my mother she gets sick often and me leaving Uni will just seriously kill her.

But I dont know, I hope I wont regret this years later.

[Brother_Mujahid]

But I dont know, I hope I wont regret this years later.[/B]

im sure you won't

just like you highlighted its a decent job/profession.

stick it out, stay cool and be happy.

[chacha_jalebi]

dont feel pressured by your family, im sure they will feel much happier if you do somethin that you will feel happier to do in the future, like your gona do the degree for yourself not your rents so im sure they will happy with what makes you happy and comfy innitt

also you can do a conversion course innit, like its only your 1st yr, and that dont count, only the 2nd and 3rd yr count, so you can easily change! dont worry eat some curry :D

[AnonymousPoster]

:sl:
Brother Mujahid thanks, Alpha dude i did thank you bro.

Chacha midwifery is a bachelor of science degree i dont think i can even convert and with us the first does count.
Jazakallah khair for your advice

[chacha_jalebi]

start again then, 1 year is nothin sis :D

[Whatsthepoint]

Law is definitely better on many levels.

[Brother_Mujahid]

Law is definitely better on many levels.

lalalal thats what you think

you don't really help save peoples lives in law... you just make them disappointed and dpressed when you pass them the bill for your services.


In midwifery you help others improve the QUALITY of life, and some instances where they may intervene and correct something can save a LIFE in doing so.

bla bla

Stick to your midwifery you'll go the greater community alot og good and put a smile on peoples faces. That should give you a definte sense of happiness and self satisfaction...

i can carry on but im sure you wouldn't want to hear it so... i'll stop here.

[AnonymousPoster]

:sl:
No your right I guess I just freaked out when your doing a medical subject and your closer to qualify it gets scary and I am now going to give it a shot since iskarah turned out in favour of it.

Whats the point is diffucult to compare subject since law and midwifery are completly different, I guess we need more midwifes than lawyers.

Make dua for me please!

[Brother_Mujahid]

ah nice to hear.....

i like happy endings. :D

now i can sleep well.

the end.

*closes book and places it back on the bookshelf*

[qassy!]

Hello

If I was in your position I would stop my Uni degree and follow Law as its your dream. If you are forced into doing something you will not be successful in it, as your heart is not set on it. Your heart once to go to law you will succeed in it, and hopfully be lawyer.

You dont need to be cleaver at doing anything in life, you have to set your goals and achive those goals!

Your 20 now, your an adult, you make your decisions in life.

[Tania]

Finish your first degree, begin to work to can help the family budget and meanwhile go for the law degree. I did the same :) Finished my economics degree, begun to work and applied for a post-university thing. The teachers are more opened minded and leave you to choose the days when you can follow the courses :) Also, i don't know if you have there something called "learning from distance" :? - are mostly only weekend courses.

[DaNgErOuS MiNdS]

Some people be doing degree at 40, 50 years of age.

[MaiCarInMtl]

Don't worry about it, it happens really often!

Here's my little story:
I started University 4 years ago, I originally was supposed to complete my degree in 3 years. Originally, I planned to do: a major in German, and a double minor in Spanish and Russian (I spoke neither language).
After a year and a half, I dropped the German and hadn't even taken a single Spanish course, started a major depression due to a failed long-term (5 year) relationship, a huge change in my whole life and consequently failed 4 out of 10 classes in 2 semesters. I was at rock bottom.
In my 4th semester (one of my most turbulent semesters), I started taking translation courses (I am French-Canadian but speak English fluently). I loved it! I continued and started putting the pieces of my life and education back together. Even though I hit a few bumps in the road, I kept at it.
I gratuated in May from one of the best universitites in Canada (world-recognized), I do what I love (translation) and I've made my family very proud (out of 7 cousins, I am the only one to actually complete a university degree). I may be tooting my own horn, but I stuck to my guns, I kept at it, I worked hard and God rewarded me.
So don't despair. Just make the changes you have to and keep at it. Plus, it's compeltely normal to start studying something and change your mind. Take this wonderful opportunity you have and make the best of it!

[CosmicPathos]

Don't worry about it, it happens really often!

Here's my little story:
I started University 4 years ago, I originally was supposed to complete my degree in 3 years. Originally, I planned to do: a major in German, and a double minor in Spanish and Russian (I spoke neither language).
After a year and a half, I dropped the German and hadn't even taken a single Spanish course, started a major depression due to a failed long-term (5 year) relationship, a huge change in my whole life and consequently failed 4 out of 10 classes in 2 semesters. I was at rock bottom.
In my 4th semester (one of my most turbulent semesters), I started taking translation courses (I am French-Canadian but speak English fluently). I loved it! I continued and started putting the pieces of my life and education back together. Even though I hit a few bumps in the road, I kept at it.
I gratuated in May from one of the best universitites in Canada (world-recognized), I do what I love (translation) and I've made my family very proud (out of 7 cousins, I am the only one to actually complete a university degree). I may be tooting my own horn, but I stuck to my guns, I kept at it, I worked hard and God rewarded me.
So don't despair. Just make the changes you have to and keep at it. Plus, it's compeltely normal to start studying something and change your mind. Take this wonderful opportunity you have and make the best of it!

its definitely McGill :D. congrats to you.

[جوري]

Haven't read anyone's reply here so my apologies if it is a repeat.
6 mins to iftar so I'll make it brief...

You are going to be the age you are going to be whenever, might as well get there doing something you like than doing something you hate... it really doesn't matter when you begin or finish.. it is all about that single step you take to realize your goal.
I was doing my masters/PhD combined and 9 months into it I realized, I didn't want to spend my life doing research.. I had already my B.S and my parents just wanted me to get married and have a job (they didn't approve of my bachelors in biology anyway) as they wanted me to go the path of all the females in the family (into pharmacy).. I pleaded with them for months, and took a few jobs with pharmaceutical companies which I hated, and eventually applied to Med school...

When you turn 38, do you want to be 38 and a midwife or 38 and a lawyer? think about that and realize that no one else is going to live your life or die your death or be accountable for your deeds, and then make the best informed decision for you insha'Allah..

:w:

[جوري]

woops... I just realized the age of this thread, I feel so foolish :haha: I wonder how the OP is doing? Insha'Allah she is on her way to achieve what she wants..

:w:

[GuestFellow]

:sl:
No your right I guess I just freaked out when your doing a medical subject and your closer to qualify it gets scary and I am now going to give it a shot since iskarah turned out in favour of it.

Whats the point is diffucult to compare subject since law and midwifery are completly different, I guess we need more midwifes than lawyers.

Make dua for me please!

Asslsamu Alikaum.

I had similar experiences like yours. My family wanted me to become a doctor so I can compete with my other relatives who are dentists and doctors. I hate science, hate maths and I hate the idea handlings patients....gross.

I wanted to do law too. :p I told my parents and they went mad. They ignored me for several weeks but they later accepted it...

But anyway I hope everything turns out fine for you!

EDIT:

Oh wow I feel stupid. This topic is kinda old. -_-;;;

[Beardo]

Asslsamu Alikaum.

I had similar experiences like yours. My family wanted me to become a doctor so I can compete with my other relatives who are dentists and doctors. I hate science, hate maths and I hate the idea handlings patients....gross.

I wanted to do law too. :p I told my parents and they went mad. They ignored me for several weeks but they later accepted it...

But anyway I hope everything turns out fine for you!

EDIT:

Oh wow I feel stupid. This topic is kinda old. -_-;;;

I'm desi, so must i really mention the option my parents gave me? Medicine. However, because they are so broad minded, masha'Allah, they gave me another option. :exhausted Computer Science.

However, my ultimate goal is not to acquire a degree. Insha'Allah I wish to do something better with my life. I believe my parents know what is best for me, and I can't go wrong by making my parents happy and by obeying them. Thus, no matter how much I hate Math and science, I am going to go for a Computer Science degree Insha'Allah.

I personally wanted to do Business Admin or Economics. Either way, Insha'Allah I'll be doing a minor in English.

Duas Requested.

[GuestFellow]

Salaam.

Yeah I think many Asian parents want to see their children go Uni and do medicine. -_-;;

Mashallah it is good to hear you’re trying to keep your parents happy. I do feel guilty for upsetting my parents and not keeping them happy. :hmm:

I will do dua for yeah.

[CosmicPathos]

I think medicine is cool but is overrated. If someone, like me, loves it then they should go for it but not cuz they succumbed to pressure from parents, peers and the like. It is generally an area which ensures job security, of course only if you are a professional and a compassionate doctor, than others such as research where you have heavily dependent on the agencies/govt to fund and if they think your project is crap then you sit down, rewrite teh whole grant application and continue submitting it (while living hand to mouth) till your grant gets released. meh.

[Humbler_359]

:sl:,

I was graduated my BS degree in Pkg Engineer that I was very grateful to work in a big companies Fisher Price and Crayola. I had a hard time in University in the beginning but I get and get better in the end. Pkg Engineer is very tough in physics, math, chemical, biology, advanced courses and I am done, whew! All sides of my parents are doctors, lol.

My parents were proud of me that I was the first person in family members to complete education in US with a degree.

My advice is it is your decision to choose any study program that make you happy, study hard and get over with it.

[markislam]

sister are you doing medicine or something ?