format_quote Originally Posted by
anonymous
^^^
Lol no, I am a brother, and I am stating that I have never felt a need for a wife yet, and I am 17, while she, for some reason needs someone at 15. The rest is right
salam alaikum brother :statisfie forgive me for thinking you were a sister lol.
ok firstly, regards your parents, i seriouslt think personally that there is another underlying issue for the decision that your parents have taken to be separated, it may be that they have been going through rough times for some time and this recent incident with your sister has been the last traw and has triggered the final decision that they have come to to separate.
now as a young adult it is hard to try and talk to your parents and ask them what is the real reason and why they have decided to go ahead with the separation cos they will always try to protect you from it and will never sit down and talk to you to the full extent and what the real reason is until they feel comfortable enough i mean unfortunately in some cases the parents never do, and it is not cos they are doing it intentionally to decieve you but with the intention to protect you and then later on in life the child eventually finds out the truth.
so in order for youto really get down to the bottom of this i suggest you go to a very dear and lose friend or family member of your family who your parents trust and respect, be very careful with you go to cos problems at home should be only discussed with trustworthy people that can help cos the last thing you want is your family issues being the lastest talk of the community and the lastest news in everyone's mouths. tell this person about the decision that your parents have taken and get them to sit down and talk to your parents to try and come to a solution.
cos in all honesty if your sister is the real reason that your parents are separating then im sorry to say brother and forgive me for this but it is a very childish and silly decision that they are making. cos this is the most vital and important time that your parents need to work with each other and being you together as a family to help your sister and come to a solution where she is made to realise that what she is doing is plain and simply wrong, even if she wants to get married out of fear of what she has done and thinks that by making things halal with this guy that it will be ok, then she is still wrong, the incident happend, the sin took place the damage has been done, he was not married to her then for it to have been lawful for them both to do such things. the only way she can rectify the problem is to turn to Allah swt and ask for forgiveness and repent and make sure that she never commits such an act ever again, but on the other hand if she has feelings for this brother and thinks that she is in love with him then she needs to be made to realise in the most effective way (not through force or mean ways) that it is not love but simlply infatuation!!!
she is wayyyyyyyyyyy too young (ok islamically no she is not and from a islamic perspective its not wrong for her to get married) but lets kind of use our own logic and be realistic here the marriage has very few chances of working out and succeeding.
now as reagrds your sister, you kind of need to tell us a little more about her sitaution, we know that she is only 15 she is a kid still, is she practising? or not so in tune with the islamic way of life.
now has she come to the decision or made her mind about marrying this brother who is your friend out of fear for what she has done and to be a good muslim or cos she has feelings for him and thinks that she is ready to be married??? cos these are two very different situations and can be advised differently.