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Ali.
09-06-2008, 11:23 PM
:sl:

I hope you are all doing well and enjoying Ramadan!

OK well this thread is about Backbiting, Hypocrasy and choosing whom you befriend. Let's start with backbiting, shall we?

Backbiting

Backbiting is often referred to by people as talking about somebody behind their back. Allah (swt) has mentioned in the Qur'an that backbiting is wrong:

O you who believe! Avoid much suspicions, indeed some suspicions are sins. And spy not, neither backbite one another. Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? You would hate it (so hate backbiting) . And fear Allah. Verily, Allah is the One Who accepts repentance, Most Merciful.
{49:12}

I've also underlined "you would hate it", oh so true. You might meet let's say... a new guy in your school, college, area, whatever, and some people may go back to their friends after meeting this new guy: "Oh, he's weird." Now think: If you were that new guy and you heard somebody talking about you in such a manner, wouldn't you be upset?

Intentions

Perfect subject for this month. Intentions are very important, and to an extent it is all that matters. For example, I heard some people fast just for the sake of it, pray just for the sake of it, just for the sake of securing your Hereafter; but do they actually fast for their Creator? Pray to their Creator, thanking him and calling unto him? Prayer is not a routine, you must be focused as to what you are actually doing. Are you focusing on the lovely patterns on the prayer mat or focusing on praying with top sincerity?

Allah will not call you to account for that which is unintentional in your oaths, but He will call you to account for that which your hearts have earned. And Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most-Forbearing.
{2:225}

Murder is a serious sin. Some may think that if you've murdered you've secured Hell, but no.

And whoever kills a believer intentionally, his recompense is Hell to abide therein, and the Wrath and the Curse of Allah are upon him, and a great punishment is prepared for him.
{4:93}

Only if it was intentional! But even if it was intentional and you're sorry and repenting, then chances are you may be forgiven. How merciful!

...Truly, Allah is oft-forgiving, Most Merciful.
{2:173}

Choosing whom you befriend

Very important. Say you're in school, college, or anywhere and you're hanging out with a group of people who do, let's say for example crime, because it's "cool", because that specific group of people are, in the eyes of certain people, "amazing", but do people ever think what those people are in the eyes of Allah (swt)? It's important that you hang around with the right people; people who won't damage your religious beliefs and what you believe.

Hadiths on friendship:

The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: "A person is likely to follow the faith of his friend, so look whom you befriend." [reported by Abu Dawood & Tirmidhee].


In another Hadith, Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: "The example of a good companion and a bad companion is like that of the seller of musk, and the one who blows the blacksmith's bellows (respectively). So as for the seller of musk then either he will grant you some, or you buy some from him, or at least you enjoy a pleasant smell from him. As for the one who blows the blacksmith's bellows then either he will burn your clothes or you will get an offensive smell from him." [Bukhari & Muslim]

In his commentary of this Hadith, Imam an-Nawawi said that the Prophet (peace be upon him) compared a good companion to a seller of musk and spoke of the virtue of having companions who are good, who have noble manners, piety, knowledge and good culture. Such are those who grant us from their virtue. And he (peace be upon him) forbade us to sit with those who do evil, commit a lot of sins and other bad deeds, as well as with innovators, backbiters, and so forth.

Another scholar said: "Keeping good company with the pious results in attainment of beneficial knowledge, noble manners and righteous actions, whereas keeping company with the wicked prevents all of that"

Qur'anic evidences:

And (remember) the Day when the wrong-doer will bite his hands and say: Woe to me! Would that I had taken a path with the Messenger. Woe to me! If only I had not taken so- and-so as a friend! He has led me astray from this Reminder (the Qur'an) after it had come to me.
{25:27-29}

Friends on that Day will be enemies one to another, except al-Muttaqoon (i.e. those who have Taqwah).
{43:67}



:w:
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Mikayeel
09-06-2008, 11:27 PM
:sl:

mashAllah bro Ali, very good reminder :) Especially now in ramadan!

:w:
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Güven
09-07-2008, 04:00 PM
:sl:

JazakAllahu Khair Bro , Very Important Reminders :)
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Re.TiReD
09-07-2008, 04:20 PM
AssalamuAlaykum

JazakAllahu khayran akhee, great thread, on the topic of friends:

In an authentic Hadith, the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: "A person is likely to follow the faith of his friend, so look whom you befriend." [reported by Abu Dawood & Tirmidhee].

Also:

Allah the Exalted says in the Qur'an: "And (remember) the Day when the wrong-doer will bite his hands and say: Woe to me! Would that I had taken a path with the Messenger. Woe to me! If only I had not taken so- and-so as a friend! He has led me astray from this Reminder (the Qur'an) after it had come to me." [25:27-29].

He also says: "Friends on that Day will be enemies one to another, except al-Muttaqoon (i.e. those who have Taqwah)." [43:67]

And:


In another Hadith, Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: "The example of a good companion and a bad companion is like that of the seller of musk, and the one who blows the blacksmith's bellows (respectively). So as for the seller of musk then either he will grant you some, or you buy some from him, or at least you enjoy a pleasant smell from him. As for the one who blows the blacksmith's bellows then either he will burn your clothes or you will get an offensive smell from him." [Bukhari & Muslim]

In his commentary of this Hadith, Imam an-Nawawi said that the Prophet (peace be upon him) compared a good companion to a seller of musk and spoke of the virtue of having companions who are good, who have noble manners, piety, knowledge and good culture. Such are those who grant us from their virtue. And he (peace be upon him) forbade us to sit with those who do evil, commit a lot of sins and other bad deeds, as well as with innovators, backbiters, and so forth.

Another scholar said: "Keeping good company with the pious results in attainment of beneficial knowledge, noble manners and righteous actions, whereas keeping company with the wicked prevents all of that."

WassalamuAlaykum Warahmatullah
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Ali.
09-07-2008, 04:22 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by JσℓιєFℓєυя
AssalamuAlaykum

JazakAllahu khayran akhee, great thread, on the topic of friends:

In an authentic Hadith, the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: "A person is likely to follow the faith of his friend, so look whom you befriend." [reported by Abu Dawood & Tirmidhee].

Also:

Allah the Exalted says in the Qur'an: "And (remember) the Day when the wrong-doer will bite his hands and say: Woe to me! Would that I had taken a path with the Messenger. Woe to me! If only I had not taken so- and-so as a friend! He has led me astray from this Reminder (the Qur'an) after it had come to me." [25:27-29].
He also says: "Friends on that Day will be enemies one to another, except al-Muttaqoon (i.e. those who have Taqwah)." [43:67]

And:


In another Hadith, Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: "The example of a good companion and a bad companion is like that of the seller of musk, and the one who blows the blacksmith's bellows (respectively). So as for the seller of musk then either he will grant you some, or you buy some from him, or at least you enjoy a pleasant smell from him. As for the one who blows the blacksmith's bellows then either he will burn your clothes or you will get an offensive smell from him." [Bukhari & Muslim]

In his commentary of this Hadith, Imam an-Nawawi said that the Prophet (peace be upon him) compared a good companion to a seller of musk and spoke of the virtue of having companions who are good, who have noble manners, piety, knowledge and good culture. Such are those who grant us from their virtue. And he (peace be upon him) forbade us to sit with those who do evil, commit a lot of sins and other bad deeds, as well as with innovators, backbiters, and so forth.

Another scholar said: "Keeping good company with the pious results in attainment of beneficial knowledge, noble manners and righteous actions, whereas keeping company with the wicked prevents all of that."

WassalamuAlaykum Warahmatullah
I was looking for all of them but I couldn't find them! Masha'Allah how do you find them all so quick? I hope you wouldn't mind if I added them to the opening post?
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Re.TiReD
09-07-2008, 04:25 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Ali.
I was looking for all of them but I couldn't find them! Masha'Allah how do you find them all so quick? I hope you wouldn't mind if I added them to the opening post?

AssalamuAlaykum

Go for it bro, may Allah (swt) reward you for such a great thread. Ameen.

Akhee, I have several books and the qur'aan open infront of me, also you could do a search on the internet... for e.g. I knew part of the hadeeth was 'look to whom you befriend'...so I typed that in to the search engine and there you have it, lol

WassalamuAlaykum
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ayan333
09-07-2008, 04:35 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Ali.
I was looking for all of them but I couldn't find them! Masha'Allah how do you find them all so quick? I hope you wouldn't mind if I added them to the opening post?

They're pro's at this stuff

can someone please explain this first part of this beautiful Ayat

O you who believe! Avoid much suspicions, indeed some suspicions are sins.And spy not, neither backbite one another. Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? You would hate it (so hate backbiting) . And fear Allah. Verily, Allah is the One Who accepts repentance, Most Merciful.
{49:12}

i always,i mean always worry about weather something is Haram or not...like if something has enzymes and i dnt no weather its from animals or plants so i jus dnt eat it,and when i get offered home made food,like deserts or what not i hesitent to take it..especially now in Ramadan...i no the punishment for eating something Haram so im extremly cautious

i dnt even eat bread anymore,or when someone makes home made pizza i dnt eat it becauss teh cheese has enzymes and ive been told most chedder cheese enzymes deprive from pork..so m left confused

i eat cereal and natural stuff

i always refer to that Hadeeth that was talking about leave that of which you are in doubt,so im confused

can someone plz explain

sorry of this is off subject,i jus remember after seeing that Ayat

JazakALLAH Khair

:w:
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Ali.
09-07-2008, 04:37 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by ayan333
They're pro's at this stuff

can someone please explain this first part of this beautiful Ayat

O you who believe! Avoid much suspicions, indeed some suspicions are sins.And spy not, neither backbite one another. Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? You would hate it (so hate backbiting) . And fear Allah. Verily, Allah is the One Who accepts repentance, Most Merciful.
{49:12}

i always,i mean always worry about weather something is Haram or not...like if something has enzymes and i dnt no weather its from animals or plants so i jus dnt eat it,and when i get offered home made food,like deserts or what not i hesitent to take it..especially now in Ramadan...i no the punishment for eating something Haram so im extremly cautious

i dnt even eat bread anymore,or when someone makes home made pizza i dnt eat it becauss teh cheese has enzymes and ive been told most chedder cheese enzymes deprive from pork..so m left confused

i eat cereal and natural stuff

i always refer to that Hadeeth that was talking about leave that of which you are in doubt,so im confused

can someone plz explain

sorry of this is off subject,i jus remember after seeing that Ayat

JazakALLAH Khair

:w:
I think it means suspicions of people. Like for example when alot of people are suspicious of all Muslims as ter*o****s. :)
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Re.TiReD
09-07-2008, 04:42 PM
AssalamuAlaykum

Aww bless you sis! The aayah isnt talking about literally eating foodstuff...Its just talking about finding faults in others and talking about them behind their backs. Backbiting has been likened to eating the flesh of the dead brother and if we would not like to eat the flesh, why would we then like to backbite?

Also:
104:1 WOE unto every slanderer, fault-finder
WassalamuAlaykum
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ayan333
09-07-2008, 04:54 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Ali.
I think it means suspicions of people. Like for example when alot of people are suspicious of all Muslims as ter*o****s. :)
format_quote Originally Posted by JσℓιєFℓєυя
AssalamuAlaykum

Aww bless you sis! The aayah isnt talking about literally eating foodstuff...Its just talking about finding faults in others and talking about them behind their backs. Backbiting has been likened to eating the flesh of the dead brother and if we would not like to eat the flesh, why would we then like to backbite?

Also:

WassalamuAlaykum

:sl:

oooo i c..ok JazakALLAH Khair...

ive jus always been told that it Haram to be over suspicious about things so when i saw the Ayat i remember it

JazakALLAH Khair

:w:
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Ali.
10-28-2008, 09:44 PM
:bump:
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seeker-of-light
10-28-2008, 10:03 PM
i have been hurt so many times by backbiting and bad friends...maybe someday i will find some friends who wont have any other reason to be my friend other than the fact that they just enjoy being around me and talking to me inshallah
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Zahida
10-28-2008, 10:15 PM
:sl: I think we have all been victims!!! But we also do this without realising that we are doing it, so if it is done without intentionally insulting the other, then i guess it's ok.......eg. 'I don't like the dress she's wearing...........' but commenting subconciously without realising you have done it???????

Ummmmmmmm am i making sense?:bump::w:
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seeker-of-light
10-28-2008, 10:22 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Zahida
:sl: I think we have all been victims!!! But we also do this without realising that we are doing it, so if it is done without intentionally insulting the other, then i guess it's ok.......eg. 'I don't like the dress she's wearing...........' but commenting subconciously without realising you have done it???????

Ummmmmmmm am i making sense?:bump::w:
umm...i think you mean thinking something negative about what someone is doing without realizing it. i guess most people do that, especially when there are people around doing very unacceptable things is hard not to think that you dont like what they are doing...but i dont think i would actually say bad things to them and insult them and hurt their feelings. now i am probably one not making sense?:P
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Zahida
10-28-2008, 10:30 PM
:sl: Na you are quite right!!

Thinking and saying something out aloud is different though....
What i meant was that sometimes i have said something out aloud whilst i am subconciously thinking it, and before i know it i have said it.............:w::thumbs_up
format_quote Originally Posted by seeker-of-light
umm...i think you mean thinking something negative about what someone is doing without realizing it. i guess most people do that, especially when there are people around doing very unacceptable things is hard not to think that you dont like what they are doing...but i dont think i would actually say bad things to them and insult them and hurt their feelings. now i am probably one not making sense?:P
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