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highway_trekker
12-20-2008, 07:35 PM
Apart from being Muslim, there is one thing that immediately comes into mind. I am so very grateful to Allah swt for my daughter Ruqayya.

She was born with an unknown genetic disorder that affected her connective tissue which in turn resulted in a heart defect.

She required heart surgery when she was days old, and when she was 8 months old (she was 8 pounds at that age and the surgery was 8 hours long).

She was also born deaf, something we suspected but confirmed when she was 5 months old. And I tell you she was truly, truly amazing. She poured her little heart out to us, and we did the same.

I learned American Sign Language from a deaf teacher, and I was determined to communicate with her, and I did. Then, she had a cochlear implant and despite her abnormal inner ears she could hear very well. She was so amazing.

She had to be fed through a feeding tube, and when the feeds didn't go well she would throw up. She also had several respiratory infections.

Often she would go into a corner and cough, and then throw up but SubhaanAllaah I tell you she would get up when she was done and come to you smiling.

She developed infantile scoliosis and had to have surgery for that too, complicated by a severe burn on her back due to laying in one position after the surgery, and this caused her a great deal of pain.

Her scars would itch, and me and my husband would rub them with lotion until she slept. May Allaah bless my husband and grant him Paradise. He is a convert to Islam, and I have never seen anything but complete certainty from him concerning Allaah and His messenger.

Every time she would get sick he would tell me she would be ok. She was always pink, kicking and fighting for her life, even while in the ICU.

The tremendous blessing was that she was mentally normal, so we could communicate with sign and voice. I will never forget her cute little hands and voice signing "I love you".

Then at the age of 4, after 6 months of flourishing she developed a cough. We took care of her at home as long as we could. Then we took her to the hospital.

My husband stayed with her the first night and she was improving. I went in the next day, and she started to deteriorate. I tried to brush her teeth before they returned her to the ICU and she bit me. I cherished that bruise as long as it would last.

She continued to deteriorate over the next two days. Then, my husband came to her side after salat-ul jum'a and started to cry. He told me he envisioned himself burying her. Before that, he had always told me she would be ok. And she wasn't pink anymore. And she wasn't fighting anymore.

Ruqqaya was 4 years old. And we removed life support except the oxygen. Then, I cleaned her up and removed all external devices. Then, I took the oxygen off and my world became me and her in that rocking chair in the ICU.

I told her I would never ever forget her. And she slowed her breathing, while she nodded her head. I wondered if she was nodding to the angels who had come to take her. Then she died in my arms.

And my husband I washed her and then he buried her with the help of my family. She died on a Friday.

SubhanAllaah I relied on Allaah for every decision. I didn't want to hurt her, I didn't want to be selfish and I didn't want to violate her. I asked Allaah to make easy for me what I thought I couldn't bear. And I tell you my brothers and sisters He did. And He changed our hearts, and He opened our eyes.

And to this day I have dreams where she comes to visit me, and she is happy, smiling, growing, and talking. And then she leaves. And I testify I love Allaah for this.

He has given me a chance to be grateful from the bottom my heart for His blessings. He has given me the opportunity to grow to love Him because of those four years of sadness and suffering. And now, when I think of Ruqiya I am so happy. I long for the day where I can see her again. I ask Allaah to have mercy on me and let me be with my daughter again. And I imagine the reunion and it fills me with joy.

But I fall so short of what I can be, so I ask Allaah for His Mercy for without His favor what is there. So I ask Allaah to forgive my shortcomings and failures where she was concerned, and to forgive my shortcomings and failures in all other aspects of my life as well, and my parents and my family, and the Ummah, so we can be granted Paradise. Inshaa'Allaah. And I am grateful for my other seven children, too.


by Umm Ayyuub
www.discoverulife.com
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Yanal
12-20-2008, 08:00 PM
Ah I feel so sympathatic to that little girl. hope Allah held her in every way Ameen.
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noorseeker
12-20-2008, 08:15 PM
May Allah swt grant her parents Jannah , inshallah
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Hamayun
12-21-2008, 11:05 AM
My wife has been weeping all night long after reading this. :cry: Subhan Allah!

May Allah (SWT) grant the parents and the little girl Jannnah.
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highway_trekker
12-21-2008, 02:14 PM
aameen
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