why *sigh*

[AnonymousPoster]

why is it that males are more loved and cared for then females. i mean in families..why is it that the bros are loved and pampered and the girls are just on the side as maid...they're emotional feeling etc aren't taken into consideration. the attitude of "oh shes girl, shell get over it" is prevalent.

why is it when a daughter upsets her mum, her mum cant get over it, but then a son does the same thing, he is forgiven without further ado!

why is it when a girl does something wrong, she is frowned upon, but when a guy does something wrong, he gets a way with a slap on the wrist...

why i it that when a girl wants something, she has to wait, and no-one helps and makes an effort. but when a son wants something, its done in a blink of an eye

why is it that the daughters feelings, needs, wants etc are SO neglected, even though we are the more "emotional" gender, and even though our feelings need to be more taken into consideration...

why is it when you try to do the right thing by people, they take advantage of your kind nature and take advantage in the fact that you are trying to please Allah, and use that against you.



what the heck is wring with people! imsad

[Silver Pearl]

:wasalamex


Aww because sons are useless and fragile. I kid you not, my mum loves the boys (as annoying and useless as they may be) because the girls will always be there. Cleaning, cooking, doing everything. So the girls don't rely on the mother and they are actually of help unlike guys. This is what mummy told me :D Its like that with every family. Don't let it get to you, the fact that your mum takes to heart anything you say that is 'hurtful' is because your words mean alot her sweetie! Plus by nature, girls are attached to their mothers, whilst boys aren't. So the mother feels the need to go just that extra mile to care for her son though they think they are men <_<

[I'm sure this thread was in the sisters section, how did it get here! O_O]

[noorseeker]

True thats the way it goes,the more bad things a guy does, the more your mum shows love to them.

I know my mum will just get out of bed to see if ive eaten, they worry about your tummies. We need more support than females,

Its a hard life beoing a guy, LOL.

Im actually looking at my pile of socks at the minute, man somethings gotta be done bout them lol

[crayon]

Hmmm, I've never experienced that, my parents treat both my brothers and I the same. I'm not a maid (!), my parents and brothers and I share the housework, my mom does get over it when she gets mad at me, both my brothers and i are frowned upon if we screw up, and we all get our feelings taken into consideration.

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[Sahabiyaat]

Hmmm, I've never experienced that, my parents treat both my brothers and I the same. I'm not a maid (!), my parents and brothers and I share the housework, my mom does get over it when she gets mad at me, both my brothers and i are frowned upon if we screw up, and we all get our feelings taken into consideration.

give my your life.


now.

[crayon]

give my your life.


now.

I sorta still kinda need it...:p

[Cabdullahi]

alhamdulilah in my household its all square and fair....maybe the thread starter isnt getting the right amount of daily attention an attention craving creature would need to survive the day?? ........i dont know allahualem

[Al-Zaara]

^ Or maybe the threadstarter simply lives in such an unfortunate environment, which are ought to perish if people would be sincere about Islam. Or if people simply understood that by being a boy or girl you're not automatically something better.

[nebula]

My household is worse for me and my brother, coz my parents treat my sisters more nicely then me and my bro.

My sisters are forgiven easier and my parents are more laid back with them then they are with me and my brother for some reason lol even tho we are the good ones :(

I guess its just about where you live and what type of parents you have :P

[IbnAbdulHakim]

my family wasnt like taht lol the heck


my sisters got soo much attention/addoration and even at times priority!


they got gifts/money when we never got anyy!!
they got taken all around when we had to stay at home at times too lol


so your WRONG




in my case at least!


Assalamu Alaikum

[Malaikah]

Cleaning, cooking, doing everything. So the girls don't rely on the mother and they are actually of help unlike guys.

More likely than not, the only reasons only the girls help out is because the mum only expects the girls to help and not eh boys! So that's hardly any excuse.

To the thread starter, I'm sorryto hear about your situation. Unfortunately there are some cultures that are like that. That kind of mentality is pathetic and totally unjustified.

[Yanal]

Asalam Alaykum. In my house it's the opposite just because I have only 1 sister & 3 brothers. The main point in this topic is that the girls just go away unknown after marriage. And sons take the generation belt to inherit property and shine and honour the name ofthe family.
Hope that clarified that topic. Asalam alaykum.
Your bro Yanal.

[IbnAbdulHakim]

^ LOL no it didnt ;D


LOOOL

[Yanal]

Yes it did:?
Watch out fighting4iman when I'm mod so stop posting off topic:D. Anyway I'm asking the creator of this thread.

[AnonymousPoster]

We need more support than females,

how so :? parents need to give equal love and support to both their daughters and sons

Im actually looking at my pile of socks at the minute, man somethings gotta be done bout them lol

i hope to god, you dont expect your mum to do them :$

Hmmm, I've never experienced that, my parents treat both my brothers and I the same. I'm not a maid (!), my parents and brothers and I share the housework, my mom does get over it when she gets mad at me, both my brothers and i are frowned upon if we screw up, and we all get our feelings taken into consideration.

well im glad to hear that. i really am. thats more like it
:)

alhamdulilah in my household its all square and fair....maybe the thread starter isnt getting the right amount of daily attention an attention craving creature would need to survive the day?? ........i dont know allahualem

excuse me ^o) i couldnt care less to "crave attention" from people who couldn't care less to give it to me!

^ Or maybe the threadstarter simply lives in such an unfortunate environment, which are ought to perish if people would be sincere about Islam. Or if people simply understood that by being a boy or girl you're not automatically something better.

what she said :rollseyes

That kind of mentality is pathetic and totally unjustified.

i couldnt agree with you more :(

Asalam Alaykum. In my house it's the opposite just because I have only 1 sister & 3 brothers.

you see im sometimes inclined to think that my bros are more spoilt is because there is only 2 of them and 7 of us girls. so i guess naturally, my mum would incline towards them. what i don't get, is why this love and compassion is shown outwardly in front of the girls, who arent given that level of attention.

The main point in this topic is that the girls just go away unknown after marriage.

lol are u trying to make me feel better :skeleton:

And sons take the generation belt to inherit property and shine and honour the name ofthe family.

i couldnt care less what they do! peopel shouldn't be degraded for stupid things like that. :$

Hope that clarified that topic.

not really, but thanks anyway :D

[AnonymousPoster]

why is it when you try to do the right thing by people, they take advantage of your kind nature and take advantage in the fact that you are trying to please Allah, and use that against you.

oh and people, u forgot this :D

[Lonely Gal]

i gues its just the way things are and there aint much to do to change it,
i know how u feel, mybro getz away with so much, he does drugs etc and yet that is not a shame on the family cos 'hes a guy' where as me whos listened to my parents, got married to who they wanted, and now its not working out, yet im still in the wrong, and i must keep trying at it cos im going to shame the family and what are everyone going to say, i bet if this was my bro, they would say ' o it just werent meant to be'.. :-(

[Musaafirah]

Aww sis. Sorry to hear that. I'm glad in our fam there's only girls, so we don't witness that kinda treatment, though mum says she'd make her son do housework also, if she had one.
I know it may be more of a cultural thing when girls are treated harsher than guys, but that does not mean parents are allowed to do such things!
The thing is, if they're not giving you your due, their reward or not is with Allah.
So, you as a daughter should pray for their guidance.
Deep down, I bet they love you to bits, it's just maybe they don't show you now. I've seen parents completely change their attitude when the daughter gets married, as if they're seeing her for the 1st time, but by then it seems to be too late.
Anyway, some hadiths.
“Whoever takes care of two girls until they reach adulthood - he and I will come (together) on the Day of Resurrection - and he interlaced his fingers (meaning in Paradise).” (Reported by Muslim)

“Whoever has three daughters or sisters, or two daughters of two sisters, and lives along with them in a good manner, and has patience with them, and fears Allah with regard to them will enter Paradise.” (Reported by Abu Dawud, Al-Tirmidhee and others)
Source: Raising daughters

[Cabdullahi]

excuse me ^o) i couldnt care less to "crave attention" from people who couldn't care less to give it to me!

i was just saying what i said before as a possibility but you've cleared it up now, so i say sorry even if my apology wont mean anything to you? :)

and inshallah your family cherishes you more ameen

[AnonymousPoster]

ughh my brother doesn't do anything, swears, cusses and yells at my mother and gets away with it, he's like 15 and my mom picks out his clothes down to his underwear in the morning, I on the other hand actually help out and the minute I make the smallest mistake i get yelled at, cursed ..etc

If I ever have a sons I will be so harsh on them.

[جوري]

whatever ignorance you see with your family toward females, try not to repeat with your children is the best advise...
It is unfortunate indeed that some still yield to that female infanticide mentality.. but they go about it in a million different ways -- seems indeed some can't get rid of the 'culture' of the jahelya.... when you become of age you should have a candid discussion with your family, if not actually now about your disappointments and expectations .. if you can't, perhaps you can try to change the way you deal with it, and if not at all then in your future avoid your daughters that kind of abuse..

and Allah swt knows best

waslaam 3lykoum wr wb

[AnonymousPoster]

i was just saying what i said before as a possibility but you've cleared it up now, so i say sorry even if my apology wont mean anything to you? :)

oh sorry, i get it :)

[qassy!]

why is it when a daughter upsets her mum, her mum cant get over it, but then a son does the same thing, he is forgiven without further ado!
Well in my fam, my sister is normally forgiven easily andim not hardlyy. But i guess with boys their generally more senseless compared 2 girls so its expect able of a boy to act stupid whereas girls are better behaved

why is it when a girl does something wrong, she is frowned upon, but when a guy does something wrong, he gets a way with a slap on the wrist...
Again i think its because boys are genreally senceless and do stupid stuff. Like I do but would never expect my sister 2 do it you get me?

why i it that when a girl wants something, she has to wait, and no-one helps and makes an effort. but when a son wants something, its done in a blink of an eye

i cant comment on that. But if your saying "I want a new watch" the son gets it, thats probly because his working, making his own money.

why is it that the daughters feelings, needs, wants etc are SO neglected, even though we are the more "emotional" gender, and even though our feelings need to be more taken into consideration...
i dont think the "male" will never understand how "emotinal" a female can get

why is it when you try to do the right thing by people, they take advantage of your kind nature and take advantage in the fact that you are trying to please Allah, and use that against you

Devils?

[Ali.]

As you, thread starter, can see from this thread that not everyone experiences your thoughts; some find the treating of sons/daughters neutral, some find it opposite and some find it like yours, i.e. it differs from family to family. What you should be asking yourself now is not "why is it that males are more loved and cared for then females", but "why is in my family it that males are more loved and cared for then females".

In all honestly I mean no harm. What I suggest you should do is go and have a chat with your mum/dad about this, and maybe you'll get an answer opposing possible suspicions about sexual preference.