format_quote Originally Posted by
J3FR
Sallam,
I am new so sorry if posted in the wrong forum.
The situation
I have had my eye on this girl in uni for a long time, and we became good friends, and I think I am falling in love with her. however, she is bengali and I am arab and so my parents will never in a million years agree to support me and will probably disown me or something worse if I told them this. what am I gonna do? I know that her parents would probably agree if my parents personally go and ask them for their daughters hand because the girl knows me very well that i am a good muslim and so on. this summer we are planning to go home to the middle east and i suspect my parents got some girl they are planning to hook me up with. I know they can never force me however what is more important, my parents happyness (obeying them and and marrying the girl they choose) or my happyness?
:sl: akhi,
first of all your relationship with this girl is haram, it is not allowed to be in such friendships for precisely the reasons you show us all.
2ndly your parents objections are asabiyyah which is forbidden, so you do not have to please them in a matter which is forbidden in islam, there is no obedience to the creation that is in disobedience to the creator.
3rdly... be a man, bro you dont have to have permission of your parents to marry, you are a man not a woman so be a man, if you want to marry then marry.
you are already doing something haram so either make it halal, at the risk of upsetting your parents or break off this friendship which is forbidden for you.
:sl: