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View Full Version : a stubborn wali-HELP! :(



AnonymousPoster
02-03-2009, 07:53 AM
title just says it all.

its the smallest and most stupidest things he rejects in prospects. not wealth or anything, but hes way too judgmental.
he doesn't properly look into any prospects, as soon as he hears something about them that he doesn't like (even though it may be perfectly legit) he rejects him. he doesn't trust us to find our own potentials either! and nor have any brothers come. i've reached a point where its killing me. i feel depressed. i want a husband. i want to be a mother :-[ imsad

he rejected 5 prospects at once because of petty reasons...

the only way i can see me and my sisters getting married is through someone he only approves of. and i meant that by someone who he sees as perfect.
i mean he wont force or anything, but if any guy came, i know i will reject him because i know my bro (my wali) wont accept anyone that doesn't suit his mentality, and i cant marry someone of his mentality, its too harsh!

so now, im stuck. there is just no options opened. its killing me.

please don't come out with, "he does it because he cares." because he doesnt. please tell me how he cares, because im seriously not seeing it!!! the only thing he seems to care about is his ego, his power and authority. im not kidding :(
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AnonymousPoster
02-03-2009, 08:02 AM
la hawlla wa la quwatta illah billah :exhausted

Can we switch from this wali to another? :-[

Try to talk him in to it, have a nice chat with him ;)

&

'It may be that you dislike a thing which is good for you, and that you like a thing which is bad for you'

Neer know, he may have a perfectly good reason to tell em to go away, but doesn't want to scare you :rollseyes

-Anon2-
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sshussain
02-03-2009, 07:41 PM
Have Patience Sis. May the time has not come for what Allah has decreed for you.
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Dawud_uk
02-03-2009, 08:27 PM
:sl:

islam is a complete system, whatever your problem islam has the answer.

for the sister who has a wali who will not help her in finding a spouse or keeps rejecting brothers who are good enough for her then once again islam has the answer.

she should go the qadi and explain her problem, if she is living in darul kufr then go to a trustworthy imam or alim for help as it is their job to fill in for the qadi if there isnt one.

if the qadi agrees the wali has rejected brothers unjustly then he can talk to the wali, explain if he continues then he will be removed as wali and the qadi can then appoint someone more reasonable from her family instead.

if no one from the family is willing to help, or go against the father then the qadi may appoint a wali from outside the family or act in this regard himself.

:sl:
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Dawud_uk
02-03-2009, 08:29 PM
:sl:

check out the folowing fatwah for a sister in a simular situation,

http://www.islam-qa.com/en/ref/91533

:sl:
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