Apostasy invalidates Marriage?? (Please help)

[corner]

Assalamu Alaikum

If a man and a woman got married islamicly (Sharia) and the man gets Kufr thoughts, blasphemious thoughts, does it invalidate the marriage? and the same with the wife is she gets it?

If it goes to the extent that the man apostates from Islam, but he never left Prayer, is the marriage invalidated even if he repents and kept it in secret all the time? Does he have to re-new the contract? What about if he left even the prayer?

I have asked these questions to one single shaikh, he was of the opinion that even if the man apostates from Islam completly, he does not need to re-new the contract if he returns to Islam because there are reports about polytheists entering Islam while their wives were Muslimahs, and they didnt have to re-new the marriage, but I need a more detailed answer to this...

And does a man become a Kaffir by only getting Kufr thoughts, if he doubts but he doesnt want to doubt, he is crying and praying for Guidance, is this man a kaffir? Or is he simply going through a Fitna from Allah like the companions did? Does Doubting invalidate you faith and/or marriage contract?

And does a man become a kaffir by sleeping through Fajr prayer, he wanted to go up but he thought "I just want to sleep a few more minutes" and woke up after Fajr.. and does he have to re-new the contract?

Are there any Hadith about apostates coming back to Islam but didnt have to re-marry or vice versa?

Thanks in advance, Barak Allahu feek!

[transition?]

Assalamu Alaikum

If a man and a woman got married islamicly (Sharia) and the man gets Kufr thoughts, blasphemious thoughts, does it invalidate the marriage? and the same with the wife is she gets it?

If it goes to the extent that the man apostates from Islam, but he never left Prayer, is the marriage invalidated even if he repents and kept it in secret all the time? Does he have to re-new the contract? What about if he left even the prayer?

I have asked these questions to one single shaikh, he was of the opinion that even if the man apostates from Islam completly, he does not need to re-new the contract if he returns to Islam because there are reports about polytheists entering Islam while their wives were Muslimahs, and they didnt have to re-new the marriage, but I need a more detailed answer to this...

And does a man become a Kaffir by only getting Kufr thoughts, if he doubts but he doesnt want to doubt, he is crying and praying for Guidance, is this man a kaffir? Or is he simply going through a Fitna from Allah like the companions did? Does Doubting invalidate you faith and/or marriage contract?

And does a man become a kaffir by sleeping through Fajr prayer, he wanted to go up but he thought "I just want to sleep a few more minutes" and woke up after Fajr.. and does he have to re-new the contract?

Are there any Hadith about apostates coming back to Islam but didnt have to re-marry or vice versa?

Thanks in advance, Barak Allahu feek!

Some clarification:
Only Kufr thoughts? as in moments of doubts? Was there a verbal declaration of apostacy?

[anonymous]

:salamext:

These sort of questions should be asked to a scholar InshaAllaah. Us laymen cannot answer these questions. InshaAllaah try and speak to your local Imaam.

[Pomak]

:salamext:

These sort of questions should be asked to a scholar InshaAllaah. Us laymen cannot answer these questions. InshaAllaah try and speak to your local Imaam.

Yes we can. Missing fajr prayer doesn't make you a kaffir, (although its a bad sign)

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[saba muslimah]

[QUOTE]Quote:
Originally Posted by anonymous


These sort of questions should be asked to a scholar InshaAllaah. Us laymen cannot answer these questions. InshaAllaah try and speak to your local Imaam.

Yes we can. Missing fajr prayer doesn't make you a kaffir, (although its a bad sign)


yep if someone doing shirk then it call Kafir
but i also want to know more detail with refrences of some ahadith..
thanx

[MO783]

I think some things should be kept private and should be discussed with a local scholar etc

[saba muslimah]

Yea..yea Right brother

[Malaikah]

:sl:

Please read the following carefully. I do not think that any of what you have mentioned is apostacy.

Disturbed by waswaas (whispers from the Shaytaan) and evil thoughts
When I do Salah or intend to do good deeds I often get very evil thoughts in my mind. When I concentrate in Salah, and try to focus on the meaning of the words, evil thoughts enter my mind, which make evil suggestions about everything including Allah. I feel very frustrated and angry about this. I know that none forgives sins except Allah alone, but because of my thoughts I feel that there is nothing worse than to have evil thoughts about Allah. After Salah I ask Allah's forgiveness, but feel very bad because I want to stop these evil thoughts, but I can't stop them. These thoughts spoil my enjoyment of Salah, and also make me feel as though I am doomed. Please advise me.

Praise be to Allaah.

Evil whispers during prayer and at other times come from the Shaytaan, who is keen to misguide the Muslim and deprive him of good and keep it far away from him. One of the Sahaabah complained to the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) about waswaas during prayer, and he said: “The Shaytaan comes between me and my prayers and my recitation, confusing me therein.” The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “That is a devil called Khanzab. If he affects you seek refuge in Allah from him and spit drily to your left three times.” He [the Sahaabi] said, I did that and Allaah took him away from me.

(Narrated by Muslim, 2203)

Proper focus (khushoo’) is the essence of prayer. Prayer without proper focus is like a body without a soul. The following are two of the things that help one to develop the proper focus:

1 – Striving to think about what you are saying and doing, pondering the meanings of the Qur’aan, dhikr and du’aa’s that you are reciting; bearing in mind that you are conversing with Allaah as if you can see Him. For when the worshipper stands to pray, he is speaking to his Lord, and ihsaan means worshipping Allaah as if you are seeing Him, and knowing that even though you cannot see Him, He sees you. Every time a person experiences the sweetness of prayer, he will be more inclined to do it. [?]. This depends of the strength of one's faith – and there are many means of strengthening one’s faith. Hence the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, “Of the things of your world, women and perfume have been made dear to me, and my joy is in prayer.” According to another hadeeth he said, “Let us relax, O Bilal, with prayer,” and he did not say, Give us a break from it.

2 – Striving to ward off the things that may distract you during prayer, namely thinking about things that are irrelevant or distracting. Waswaas affects each person differently, because waswaas has to do with a person’s level of doubts and desires and the degree to which a person is attached to other things or is fearing other things.

(From Majmoo’ Fataawa Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah, 22/605)

With regard to what you say about the waswaas reaching such a great level that you have begun to experience waswaas that makes you think about Allaah in ways that are not appropriate, these are evil whispers from the Shaytaan. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“And if an evil whisper from Shaytaan (Satan) tries to turn you away (O Muhammad) (from doing good), then seek refuge in Allaah. Verily, He is the All‑Hearer, the All‑Knower”

[Fussilat 41:36]

Some of the Sahaabah complained about the waswaas that was bothering [?] them. Some of the companions of the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) came to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and said to him, ‘We find in ourselves thoughts that are too terrible to speak of.’ He said, ‘Are you really having such thoughts?’ They said, ‘Yes.’ He said, ‘That is a clear sign of faith.’” (Narrated by Muslim). (Narrated by Muslim, 132 from the hadeeth of Abu Hurayrah).

Al-Nawawi said in his commentary on this hadeeth: “The Prophet’s words, ‘That is a clear sign of faith’ means, the fact that think of this waswaas as something terrible is a clear sign of faith, for if you dare not utter it and you are so afraid of it and of speaking of it, let alone believing it, this is the sign of one who has achieved perfect faith and who is free of doubt.”

And it was said that what it means is that the Shaytaan only whispers to those whom he despairs of tempting, because he is unable to tempt them. As for the kaafir, he can approach him in any manner he wants and is not restricted to waswaas, rather he can play with him however he wants. Based on this, what the hadeeth means is that the cause of waswaas is pure faith, or that waswaas is a sign of pure faith. See also question no. 12315

The fact that you hate that and your heart recoils from it is a clear sign of faith. Waswaas happens to everyone who turns to Allaah by reciting dhikr etc. It is inevitable, but you have to be steadfast and patient, and persevere with your dhikr and prayer, and not give up, because in this way you will ward off the plot of the Shaytaan. “Ever feeble indeed is the plot of Shaytaan” [al-Nisa’ 4:76 – interpretation of the meaning]. Every time a person wants to turn to Allaah, waswaas brings other matters to mind. The Shaytaan is like a bandit: every time a person wants to move towards Allaah, he wants to block the way. Hence when it was said to one of the salaf that the Jews and Christians say, “We do not experience waswaas,” he said, “They are speaking the truth, for what would the Shaytaan do with a house in ruins?”

(From Fataawa Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah, 22/608).

The remedy:

1 – If you feel that you are being affected by this waswaas, say, “Aamantu Billaahi wa Rasoolihi (I believe in Allaah and His Messenger).” It was narrated from ‘Aa’ishah that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The Shaytaan comes to one of you and says, ‘Who created you?’ And he says ‘Allaah.’ Then the Shaytaan says, ‘Who created Allaah?’ If that happens to any one of you, let him say, Aamantu Billaahi wa Rusulihi (I believe in Allaah and His Messenger). Then that will go away from him.”

(Narrated by Ahmad, 25671; classed as hasan by al-Albaani in al-Saheehah, 116).

2 – Try to stop thinking about that as much as possible, and keep busy with things that will distract you from it.

Finally we advise you to keep on turning to Allaah in all situations, and to ask Him for help, and to beseech Him, and to ask Him to make you steadfast until death, and to cause you to die doing righteous deeds… And Allaah knows best.

http://www.islam-qa.com/en/ref/25778/bad%20thoughts

[corner]

Some clarification:
Only Kufr thoughts? as in moments of doubts? Was there a verbal declaration of apostacy?

Naudhubillah, again, naudhubillah, verbal declaration? I would rather kill myself before a kufr word comes out of my mouth, metaphorically, I would kill my self rather than this!

The thing is, Im in A LOT in the Da'wah field, and sometimes the kuffar pose questions which I cannot answer directly, and I ponder and ponder and ponder over it, and in the mean time, (I believe) shaytan comes to me and whispers evil things, but I allways seek Allahs help, I sometimes cry over it, and after this, he says "You have made Kufr because of these thoughts", this is disturbing me a lot!

I know that even the companions used to get evil whisperings, such as this Hadith:

"and there occurred In my mind a sort of denial which did not occur even during the Days of Ignorance. When the Messenger of Allah (may peace be upon him) saw how I was affected (by a wrong idea), he struck my chest, whereupon I broke into sweating and felt as though I were looking at Allah with fear. (Muslim :: Book 4 : Hadith 1787 )

But Shaytan keeps debating me (LITERALLY, I debate in my mind) that my marriage is invalid and that I'm living in Zeenah!

[anonymous]

which part of "ask your locam imam" do you not underastand? we aren't scholars brother

[anonymous]

Edit: you can go and ask any scholar of Islam and they will tell u that u are not a kafir for having these thoughts, n neither is your marriage invalidated. It is just the shaytaan playing with you and worrying you because u are a person of Eemaan and a threat to him. See the above post by Malaikah. May Allaah protect you and us all.

[anonymous]

I was actually trying to edit the above comment but it didn't work. Increased security :D

[corner]

I was actually trying to edit the above comment but it didn't work. Increased security :D

why do they not allow editing posts and/or comments?

[anonymous]

You can edit posts/comments once you have 50 posts. Also anonymous cannot edit their posts.

[Kafir]

I thought this might be the place to pose the following question. It has been some time since I have posted, but if one wishes to look at the few posts I have made previously by running a search on my member name, they will extoll some information concerning my thoughts on religion, the gender tradition and my marriage. I won't repeat those things again here because I don't wish to make a long post.

I am a Kafir, as seen by my name. I was born to a staunch Catholic family related to the papacy and this caused alot of issues with me in following the religion which had a terrible history of committing countless acts of atrocity. Unlike most Christians, I knew too much about the bloody past of the church to feel it was truly a manifestation of divinity.

That questioning and discomfort with the church led me on a decade long journey of studying theology. I received a degree in comparative religions and have written extensively on the subject as well as taught world religion courses at the university level. I became a full blown atheist by the age of 23 when I had completed a few years of higher education and was confronted by the overwhelming lack of a evidence for a deity and far too many questions in regards to ethology of orthodoxy.

I still do love religion however, and my studying of the topic has never weaned. I read books on the topic, contemplate the origin of existence, and honestly attempt to live a life which improves the misery of others on a daily basis. I do these things out of my desire to have intellectual and ethical integrity.

I am married to a muslim man. I chose him because his ethics, family values, goals, sense of compassion, propensity to inquire and be active in making the world a more bearable place for others, was equal to my own. I know he chose me for similar reasons. We are truly best friends, mental companions, we talk daily about a multitude of topics and connect on so many levels in regards to our views. I love my husband with all of my being. It is my dire wish to make him feel complete, happy and pro-active in every way he needs. Which brings up the religion question...

My husband knew when he met me that I was a kafir, we have had more debates on the topic than I can possibly count in the 4 years we have been together. Though I do not believe I could ever be a muslim, because I am devoid of faith in a higher power and have issues with every doctrine I have read on a moral level, I encourage him to embrace his religion. My husband isn't much of a practicioner. He proclaims Mohommad is his rasul every evening before sleep and sometimes in the morning. He doesn't eat pork and will contemplate Allah on Rammadan. He wishes to make Hajj and he keeps he dress modest in accordance to Qur'anic teachings. Many of his manners come from Islamic culture, from the way he believes in treating other to his personal sense of justice. He seems rather comfortable with just this low level of activity. And though he wasn't active long before he met me, it bothers me that he may feel bad inside for not embracing Islam more (at least thats how I felt when I wasn't pro-active in the church as a Catholic in my youth).

And so I encourage my husband to observe his religion more. Though I am a kafir I believe that is no reason to not encourage my husband to feel full religiously. So I have taken to wearing hijab when in his country and I will occasionally wear it here in the states when I know I will be close to muslims. I have asked repeatedly to go to the mosque, even went without him! I have attempted to read the Qur'an with him on many occasions, but he always walks away after a few moments. I have tried to find a muslim group near our city, so that he can have connections to people near to our home. I have joined internet forums (obviously) and have tried to read extensively, even sending him articles of interest.

This is so odd because though I am kaffir, it seems I am more active in Islam than my muslim husband! It has bothered me that perhaps he doesn't want to share his religion with me because I am not a believer. So I have asked him repeatedly why he doesn't practice more. He always gives standard answers like: "Allah knows I believe him and I am try to be a good person" or "maybe I will practice more when i get older".

As a student of religion I KNOW many muslims who do not practice in their youth get very scared as they grow older and are filled with regrets. I do NOT want that happening to my husband and so I am trying to encourage him to have a rich religious life NOW and through his entire life. I don't want him filled with regrets and scared of death later.

But tonight as I was washing the dishes I asked him again: "Why don't you go to the mosque with me? I went last time alone, its weird that you are the muslim yet I am the one going to the mosque." And he says to me: "If I practice Islam then I have to divorce you, because you are a kafir." Now I read the Qur'an so I know full well that men can only marry people of the book, and muslimahs only fellow muslims. But, as a person of ethics I believe it is only logical that there are exceptions to that law. It seems to me that this teaching was to ensure that children are raised in Islam and that muslims be saved from the immorality of a non-religious spouse. I can understand why this teaching is there, however, it is based on the precept that all kafirs are immoral people or that we won't allow children to learn religion, which though in many cases is true, it is NOT in my case. On the contrary, the muslim woman my husband had a relationship with previously NEVER encouraged him to embrace Islam; while me, the big 'ole off limits kaffir is bending over backwards repeatedly to make sure he feels whole in Islam. And I have taken my children to the mosque!

Matters such as caring for the fullness of your mate is not merely a result of religion, its a trait any GOOD person would express, regardless of their theology. Subsequently, it makes sense in my mind that Allah, if he exists, would equally see this too. I was offended this evening that my husband feels he would have to divorce me if he really wanted to be a good muslim. I was horrified that in his mind a person, no matter how pure their intentions and life has been, is rendered unknowable due to lack of faith.

It reeked of exclusivism to me... It reeked of self-righteousness and frankly: ignorance. Ignorance of what makes a person good and more over: it limits God's love. I look at the universe and I see a diverse place of all levels of existence. From the atom to the star and I think to myself, if a God exists then it must truly love diversity. I look at the animal kingdom and I see beauty everywhere from the beastly lion which kills to survive to the tame lamb which feeds upon the grass and I think to myself that God can not be so judgmental as religion would have us believe because its clear from creation that so many forms of life who act in varying ways are allowed to exist. I think to myself that if Allah knows the heart and mind of every being than surely, an eternal hell can not exist. Because no matter how evil in this life, every person was once an innocent child and most of the bad they had done is a result of the bad that was done to them in their youth. What loving parent would eternally torture their child for a finite crime? These concepts are not divine to me, they are human, born of mortal minds who are trapped in barbarism, not born of ever lasting love which springs from the fountain of all creation. Relgion for me dirty the concepts of God. I'd much rather have no religion and believe in goodness, true fairness and love than to limit it by a doctrine sprung from human hand.

II know that may sound offensive to muslims, or any one who follows an orthodoxy. Please know I don't say it to attack religion, I say it because those are truly concepts I struggle with and I can't be alone in that. Surely, there must be others who see this too. When I think of the practical applications of what my husband says it frightens me. My husband literally believes in his mind that he will go to hell for marrying me. He literally believes in his mind that I will go to hell for being a kafir. I can't accept that ideology. I can't accept the idea that if a God exists and I face a judgment that I will go to an ever lasting hell because I didn't believe. That it won't matter I spent my life caring for my family. It won't matter that I held my father as he passed from this world, keeping vigil at his bedside as he had done for me in my youth. It won't matter that I cared for my aging mother who is widowed and alone. It won't matter that I cared for my neices and nephews as their parents toiled. It won't matter that I toiled and gave away a good deal of my money to organizations that alleive misery in this world. It won't matter that I dragged myself out in the freezing snow every day for 8 years to picket against the atrocious war in Iraq and Afghanistan. It won't matter that I organized protests against vicious governments or fund raisers for handicapped children. My life spent won't matter because I didn't do it for a God, I did it for my love of goodness.

And the same for my husband, how many wonderful things he has done in this life for others, even facing hell in his mind to come be a protector and provider of a 30 year old woman, orphaned children and widowed mother. He will go to hell for loving marginalized people? Maybe because I was a Catholic I don't understand this... Jesus said in the Bible that those who give all they have to the poor, who love the widowed and the fatherless are the chosen of God. Yet he also said those who don't believe will be cast into hell fire. So what if a person is both? Why does hell fire come before being good?

And thats why I can't believe what my husband said. I can't believe that faith comes before being a decent loving person. There are far too many people who call themselves religious live horrible disgusting lives of abuse. The roman priests who burned my celt ancestors at the stake for the false accusation of witchery had faith, are those priests who murdered millions in heaven? Bush declares himself a Christian yet he murdered over 1 million innocent Iraqi children, he is better than the kafir who harms no one? I can not understand this idea!

And so I am coming here, out of all places. Because at this point I REALLY need to hear from a muslim if what my husband says is true. Frankly, if it is true, that Allah cares more about faith than he does about goodness, then I really will be permanently turned off from Islam. I will continue to encourage my husband to be a believer because I know he needs it, but I will not go out of my way anymore since I wouldn't be advocating in my mind what is good. But if my husband is wrong, and its not true, then I want him to hear it from a fellow muslim's mouth. He doesn't seem to take what I say on this matter simply because I'm not a muslimah.

I know this may be a controversial topic, but I really want some input on this topic. I would appreciate any response.

[Kafir]

Assalamu Alaikum

If a man and a woman got married islamicly (Sharia) and the man gets Kufr thoughts, blasphemious thoughts, does it invalidate the marriage? and the same with the wife is she gets it?

If it goes to the extent that the man apostates from Islam, but he never left Prayer, is the marriage invalidated even if he repents and kept it in secret all the time? Does he have to re-new the contract? What about if he left even the prayer?

I have asked these questions to one single shaikh, he was of the opinion that even if the man apostates from Islam completly, he does not need to re-new the contract if he returns to Islam because there are reports about polytheists entering Islam while their wives were Muslimahs, and they didnt have to re-new the marriage, but I need a more detailed answer to this...

And does a man become a Kaffir by only getting Kufr thoughts, if he doubts but he doesnt want to doubt, he is crying and praying for Guidance, is this man a kaffir? Or is he simply going through a Fitna from Allah like the companions did? Does Doubting invalidate you faith and/or marriage contract?

And does a man become a kaffir by sleeping through Fajr prayer, he wanted to go up but he thought "I just want to sleep a few more minutes" and woke up after Fajr.. and does he have to re-new the contract?

Are there any Hadith about apostates coming back to Islam but didnt have to re-marry or vice versa?

Thanks in advance, Barak Allahu feek!

Though no one answered my personal post, which I really hope someone does. I believe I can answer yours. Granted, I'm not a muslim, nor an Imam (though I do have a graduate degree in comparative religions and know enough about scripture to understand laws, its the contemporary interpretations of those laws on a moral level that I struggle with) but I hope what I will say will be of some comfort.

I think it takes ALOT more than just sleeping through a prayer to be a Kafir. Kafir is the state of being devoid of faith, not just in any deity, but in a monotheist divinity, specifically the divinity as manifested from the abrahamic line.

If someone believes in the abrahamic line then they are a person of the book according to the Qur'an. Matters of practice show not faith but essentially subjegation to God's will or choice in expression of a particular faith. I think to lump anyone who doesn't practice religiously as a kafir is a denial of the much more important spiritual facet of religion. In the end, religion is defined by one's relationship with God. Its not defined by how many times you bow your head to the ground, how many menorahs you light or if you keep lent. Its defined primarily by your belief and love, the rest are outward expressions. And though if one is filled with fervor they are more apt to take the practicality of religion to a higher level, a lack of fervor is not the same as a lack of faith.

Again, you may dismiss my opinin because I'm not a muslim, but I tell you as a kafir, its a whole lot more than just prayer which makes one a non-believer.

In Christianity, one of the followers of Jesus was a skeptic, "Doubting Thomas". Jesus did admonish him a few times for being so skeptical yet at the same time he appreciated his struggle to WANT to believe. I think doubts are common and are actually a GOOD thing. Obviously, if Allah exists then he wanted us to have and use our rational mind, even if it leads to doubts. What good is love from an angel who are created to believe? Are humans not more precious to Allah in Islamic tradition BECAUSE they struggle with doubt and try to love Allah despite it? The measure of a faith is not just in accepting blindly, rather its in believing despite the rational mind's arguments.

And so, I wouldn't worry to much unless he begins actually asserting Islam is a falsehood, Allah does not exist and Abraham was wrong. Until that time comes, he is no true kafir.

[Kafir]

I am under 50 posts and so I can not respond to private messages...

I did not know this until I received a pm and tried to respond only to get the "sorry" error. Because its private I don't wish to mention who imd me but I do wish to thank them and post my response.

"I wish to thank you so much for this very insightful private message. It means two fold because not only does it make me feel better about Islam, which I NEEDED, but it also helps me at a time where I was feeling unwelcome on this forum. I was just in the thread where I had posted this initial question you are responding to and someone accused me of lying, essentially talked down to me because I am not a believer. I was ready to close this forum in disgust when I seen your private message appear.

It means alot to me, sincerely. Many times in my life I have been treated shabbily for not being religious. Such treatment only makes the idea of God more bitter in my mouth. And yet one person can really shift your paradigm from feeling excluded to realizing that its not a universal phenomena.

So I have read your message twice. Once to understand your view on your my question and another just because I needed to digest that you wrote it right when I was ready to leave the forum.

I thank you for bringing up historical incidences regarding marrying kafirs and later conversions. These are things I can locate in my qur'an and show to my husband. As I said in the thread when I say something he tends to dismiss it, but if I pull it from the Qur'an it gives the sentiment more authority.

I have told my husband that if he goes to the mosque or joins a study group that I would join with him and give an honest attempt to consider converting if I can feel Allah exists and the Qur'an is virtuous. (Which are huge things so maybe this is why he hasn't done it. He has said in passing he doesn't believe I can ever become a muslim because I am too skeptical). And so because he hasn't picked me up on the offer it bothered me as to why. So when I asked him and he shot back the comment about divorce I was horrified! I NEEDED to hear what he thought wasn't true. Thank you so much for this.

I do not wish to trouble you. But if you happen to know off hand what parts of the Qur'an and Hadiths I can grab to show him that would be great! Otherwise I'll have to run searches on the internet and try to browse through those massive tomes hoping I can come across it by pure coincidence. I honestly don't say it because I'm lazy, but because the Qur'an is very foreign to me, despite reading it, considering so many of the terms are of a language I have no concept of. Moreover, its not in a chronological order and that makes it very hard for me to navigate.

Thank you again, you brought me some hope today."

That was my message to you, who shall remain anonymous, in private message. I understand if you can not show me the verses so feel free to disregard that. I plan to go search the internet now so that hopefully I can find some incidences and share them with my husband tomorrow. I hope he will listen.

[Kafir]

Woops, considering the post I am refering to above was deleted, please feel free to delete this one. I didn't know it until I already posted. My apologies!

[Muhaba]

1. Read Ayatul Kursi & the 4 Quls.

2. Questions presented by non-muslims put doubts in a persons mind. for this the knowledge of Quraan is necessary, therefore, read the tafsir, for example Tafsir of Sayyid Abul Ala Maududi. Read it thoroughly so that you have knowlegde and will be able to answer questions.

When working in the field of dawah without having the knowledge of Quraan, your position is like the one standing on a sand dune. that means your basis is not strong and due to waaswaas from shaytaan and humans you may slip easily. but if you try to understand the Holy Quraan in accordance with the Prophet Muhammad (SAW) {like from tafsir } sincerely, then you will see that any question in your mind or infront of you has the answer in the Quraan right in front of you because Quraan is a miraculous book. It has answer for every question and every place and time. And if you are sincere and act with the fear of Allah, surely Allah will help you and protect you from straying. Rather you will become so strong insha-Allah that the enemy of Islam will not be able to stand in front of you (for putting doubts in your mind).

[Pomak]

kafir, what your husband said was right. The exception to the rule is in fact marrying believing Jews/Christians. I think instead of slagging off god, some reflection of how much he is sacrificing, is in order. (no offense intended)

[AntiKarateKid]

I don't understand why people dismiss religion because of the evil actions of so called believers.

For example, yes conquistadors killed most of the native americans in the name of Christ, but... did they do it in accordance with the Bible or against it?

The answer of course is against it. Saying you are for example a Christian doesn't mean that some moral switch suddenly turns on. In Islam, you need to work at the morals you espouse.


So I am puzzled at your distaste of religion due to the actions of people which contradict their religion. It seems to me... for lack of a better phrase... a copout.

[glo]

And he says to me: "If I practice Islam then I have to divorce you, because you are a kafir."

I was offended this evening that my husband feels he would have to divorce me if he really wanted to be a good muslim.

My husband literally believes in his mind that he will go to hell for marrying me.

Hi Kafir

I enjoy reading your posts. It is obvious how much thought and consideration goes into them ...

I wonder how you and your husband got on?
Did you go to mosque together?
Did you convince him that it is okay to be married to a non-believer?

When I read your post I was struck by your husband's attitude towards you.
Did it occur to you how - believing he will be punished for marrying you - self-sacrificial your husband really is? To be prepared to sacrifice his after-life for this earthly life with you??
That man must REALLY love you!

(I understand that Islamically his actions may be considered wrong, but humanly they are really quite beautiful!)

I would love to hear how you are doing! :)

Peace

[AntiKarateKid]

Nvm