...Candle burns at both ends

[reknits]

I have always known that I was adopted. But a week ago I found that I am terminally ill with cancer. I have roughly six months to live.
My adoptive mother felt it was necessary for me to know the truth about who I am. My real parents were Muslims. They were found murdered by Christian fanatics in Turkey. I am 37 years old. I have been living a life as a British Christian all these years all because of a lie! I am so angry towards Christians. I am a Muslim by birth, by inheritance. And I have no time to live as a Muslim.
I want to die for Allah.

[crayon]

I'm sorry to hear all that brother, may Allah make it easy for you.:(
Being "muslim by birth" doesn't really mean anything, whether you're a born muslim, or a revert, you still have to make a conscious decision to believe in Islam.
The shahada takes mere seconds to say, that is all that is needed to start your journey on the road of Islam. How much time you will have for that journey only Allah knows, but all you have to do is start.

The prophet peace be upon him said:
"“Almighty Allah says, ‘I treat my slave (man) according to his expectations
from Me, and I am with him when he remembers me. If he remembers Me in his
heart, I remember him in My heart; if he remembers Me in a gathering, I
remember him in a better and nobler gathering (i.e. of angels) if he comes
closer to Me by one span, I go towards him a cubit’s length, if he comes
toward Me by a cubit’s length, I go towards him an arm’s length, and if he
walks towards Me, I run unto him."

[Dawud_uk]

I have always known that I was adopted. But a week ago I found that I am terminally ill with cancer. I have roughly six months to live.
My adoptive mother felt it was necessary for me to know the truth about who I am. My real parents were Muslims. They were found murdered by Christian fanatics in Turkey. I am 37 years old. I have been living a life as a British Christian all these years all because of a lie! I am so angry towards Christians. I am a Muslim by birth, by inheritance. And I have no time to live as a Muslim.
I want to die for Allah.

if you believe in Allah without associating partners with him, and affirm all the major beliefs of a muslim then you are muslim and you can confirm that here then get someone to help you practice a little before you die.

i live in the uk and could try to help you find someone who can talk to you in person if you wish,

and if you do become muslim, you need to realise that everything you did before is wiped clean, you would go to your creator as clean and sinless as a baby and you will have plenty of time in the afterlife to be a believer!

[glo]

Welcome to LI, reknits. :)

I am sorry to hear about your diagnosis.
I pray that you will make good use of the time God has given you.

Whatever you decide to you, remember that forgiveness is an important step when finalising things here on earth too.

God's peace to you.

Hey there! Looks like you're enjoying the discussion, but you're not signed up for an account.

When you create an account, you can participate in the discussions and share your thoughts. You also get notifications, here and via email, whenever new posts are made. And you can like posts and make new friends.
Sign Up

[Hamayun]

Oh Brother. I know it doesn't matter what I say to you at this point but I just wanted to say..

If you accept God without any partners and choose the Islamic way of life all your previous sins are forgiven. You have a chance to die as a true muslim with very few sins to answer for.

I wish I could help you in any other way but all I can do is pray for you and be here for you if you ever need anyone to talk to.

May Allah guide you and protect you from sin.

P.S. being born as a muslim means nothing. It is your beliefs and actions that make you a muslim. Having a Muslim name and parents means nothing.

Peace :)

[reknits]

Thank you for all of your thoughts and encouragement.
I am at loggerheads. Whist I scour the Internet to discover the truth I see a site called Islam Watch. They claim to have been Muslims and are now trying to bring the Islamic faith down. I can only imagine that their site is a fake? It is somewhat disconcerting.

You say I have to forgive the Christians. But they have kept me in the dark for all these years. I haven't long to live. Would it be fair to take some of them out for their deceit? I don't want to anger Allah. I am so confused. They hinder the Islamic ways.

[nadia85]

You are a Christian. What is a Christian doing in a Muslim forum?
It's your kind that have kept me from knowing the truth my whole life. It is your kind that killed my parents!

It s forum for all people not just muslims!!!!!!!

[Musaafirah]

Bro, please don't generalise. That's what normally gives rise to prejudice.
Alhamdulillah though, now you want to live your life as a muslim and want to do what's right. You can start by not holding a grudge. May Allah help you in this difficult time.

[reknits]

No. Absolutely not!

Why?

[reknits]

Gee, why aren't you allowed to kill innocent people? Hmm, I wonder. :exhausted

I'm very reluctantly giving you the benefit of the doubt here because you seriously seem like a forum troll. Prove me wrong.

Thank. And yes, that's with sarcasm.
Look, from where I'm sat, I've been in the dark all my life. Because I'm a darker skin I haven't been accepted as a true English man. Anger number one.

And then I find out I'm dying. Anger two.

And Now I know who I'm meant to be, I don't know the language or any quran. Yet I have a burning passion in me. With so little time to actually live as I'm meant. Anger three.

And to top it all, I come here seeking some answers and told I'm a troll!


And I am not meant to be angry? I don't even know ME!
So for pitty sake, cut me some slack!

[Güven]

If you have so little time left , then you should get rid of your sins by doing good deeds , by getting closer to your Lord etc. and not hanging on this forum telling us that you are angry and if its ok to get rid of some christians for revenge.(wich is a sin)

whats the use of killing when you already know that you are going to....die.
it wont make you feel better , its not gonna bring back your parents , its not gonna make your life better.

[Hamayun]

Brother the site you mentioned is a propaganda site that is based on lies and things taken out of context.

The internet is a dangerous place to be learning Islam because there are organisations and religions out there that will do anything to get people to join their "side".

I know people normally feel shy/reluctant to do this but you need to meet with an Imaam at your local Mosque or meet an Islamic Scholar.

There is nothing better than having your questions answered face to face.

Please stay away from the propaganda sites and if you want to learn about Islam learn it from the main source... the Islamic scriptures. Then there will be no room for lies. For every Muslim that leaves Islam another 1000 come to Islam to replace him.

Like I said Brother you can add me on msn if you need to talk. I am no Scholar but I can at least share with you what I know of Islam.

Brother also although I know it doesn't offer much comfort but I wanted to say that we are all gonna die soon. Some sooner than the others but truth is it could happen tomorrow, today, right now! We just fail to acknowledge the only definite thing in life... death.

Brother please do meet with a good, well educated Imam/Scholar as soon as possible.

Also if you knew the character of our beloved Prophet (peace be upon him)your mind would be at ease and you would ignore the lies people spread about him. Here is a beautiful article about the Prophet (peace be upon him)

http://www.convertstoislam.com/ThePr...heprophet.html

Also brother here are a few of my favourite videos for you

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4bXr-Zdo2bA

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TcNOaePZT68

http://us2.harunyahya.com/Detail/T/E..._OF_THE_QUR_AN

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e_mlvVVGln0

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7IILr6YhBLo



Funny Australian revert part 1
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pthRGKkMMHM

Funny Australian revert part 2
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R_L7s...eature=related


Some great audio lectures about Islam here. Especially the one about Science:

http://www.aswatalislam.net/DisplayF...ame=Zakir_Naik

Brother as I said I am here for you if you need someone to talk to.

May Allah's peace and blessings be upon you.

Your Brother in Islam.

Hamayun

Edit: Guys can you please cut him some slack? You need to understand how he is feeling right now. Rather than criticising him why not offer some good advice. Please...

[reknits]

Brother the site you mentioned is a propaganda site that is based on lies and things taken out of context.

The internet is a dangerous place to be learning Islam because there are organisations and religions out there that will do anything to get people to join their "side".

I know people normally feel shy/reluctant to do this but you need to meet with an Imaam at your local Mosque or meet an Islamic Scholar.

There is nothing better than having your questions answered face to face.

Please stay away from the propaganda sites and if you want to learn about Islam learn it from the main source... the Islamic scriptures. Then there will be no room for lies. For every Muslim that leaves Islam another 1000 come to Islam to replace him.

Like I said Brother you can add me on msn if you need to talk. I am no Scholar but I can at least share with you what I know of Islam.

Brother also although I know it doesn't offer much comfort but I wanted to say that we are all gonna die soon. Some sooner than the others but truth is it could happen tomorrow, today, right now! We just fail to acknowledge the only definite thing in life... death.

Brother please do meet with a good, well educated Imam/Scholar as soon as possible.

Also if you knew the character of our beloved Prophet (peace be upon him)your mind would be at ease and you would ignore the lies people spread about him. Here is a beautiful article about the Prophet (peace be upon him)

http://www.convertstoislam.com/ThePr...heprophet.html

Also brother here are a few of my favourite videos for you

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4bXr-Zdo2bA

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TcNOaePZT68

http://us2.harunyahya.com/Detail/T/E..._OF_THE_QUR_AN

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e_mlvVVGln0

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7IILr6YhBLo



Funny Australian revert part 1
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pthRGKkMMHM

Funny Australian revert part 2
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R_L7s...eature=related


Some great audio lectures about Islam here. Especially the one about Science:

http://www.aswatalislam.net/DisplayF...ame=Zakir_Naik

Brother as I said I am here for you if you need someone to talk to.

May Allah's peace and blessings be upon you.

Your Brother in Islam.

Hamayun

Edit: Guys can you please cut him some slack? You need to understand how he is feeling right now. Rather than criticising him why not offer some good advice. Please...

You seem like a very sincere person. I like you. You have a sort of peace about yourself that radiates, I hope that makes sense?
I trust you about that website.
But going into a mosque... I want to but I don't. Odd, I know, but I quess I'm scared.
I still have the phone number of one of my old work buddies. He was a Muslim. I used to poke fun of him, but he took it all very well. I'll phone him later, see if he fancies a pint and a chat.
I'm sorry about my anger in the previous posts. I find that if I'm alone for any lenght of time I dwell on things. I probably get it all out of preportion. But last night I cried for ages, untill I was so weak. I've never done that before. It's given me a massive headache, but the release was benificial.

We do all die at some time. But I guess I just didn't want to know when and so painfully! It's scary. But I will fight for every last breath. And I will try to forgive everyone. I might phone my adoptive mother today, too. Maybe that will be a good place to start. I actually feel good about that, like it would be the best thing to do.

[*charisma*]

Hey,

Who knows, maybe this is Allah's way of guiding you, and once you become a Muslim, there should be nothing to fear! You will be considered sinless and be amongst those in Paradise.

Don't be scared to go into a mosque, there are a lot of nice people who would be so happy to help you. Keep your faith up. :)

Welcome to the forum bro.

Peace.

[reknits]

If you have so little time left , then you should get rid of your sins by doing good deeds , by getting closer to your Lord etc. and not hanging on this forum telling us that you are angry and if its ok to get rid of some christians for revenge.(wich is a sin)

whats the use of killing when you already know that you are going to....die.
it wont make you feel better , its not gonna bring back your parents , its not gonna make your life better.

You are absolutely right. And I'm sorry. I know I'll never bring my parents back, but I know they were true to Allah. And they will have been content in their hearts.
My time at my computer, it's my down time before my day begins and before I go to sleep. And I am making good of it. I've found people like you who are eager to advise me. I owe you my gratitude.
Thank you

[reknits]

Hey,

Who knows, maybe this is Allah's way of guiding you, and once you become a Muslim, there should be nothing to fear! You will be considered sinless and be amongst those in Paradise.

Don't be scared to go into a mosque, there are a lot of nice people who would be so happy to help you. Keep your faith up. :)

Welcome to the forum bro.

Peace.

I know it sound stupid. But because I have not lived a Muslim life, I feel ashamed. I know, I know. It's irrational. But that's how I feel. I'll speak to my old mate first.
But, thank you for your kindness

[*charisma*]

I know it sound stupid. But because I have not lived a Muslim life, I feel ashamed. I know, I know. It's irrational. But that's how I feel. I'll speak to my old mate first.
But, thank you for your kindness

Don't worry, at least you got to know during your lifetime. Try to stay optimistic about things. Just like bro guven said, start now and try to advance towards being closer to the faith as much as you can! As long as you try your hardest, you can't say that it wasn't worth anything..it's worth A LOT! This could only be a test for you and a wake up call.

[reknits]

May I ask you something?
I was brought up in the Christian faith so I have a loose understanding of their old testament.
Are Muslims the descendants of Abraham?

[*charisma*]

Yes, they are.

Islam and Christianity have a lot of similarities, however Christianity has been distorted throughout history and is no longer a reliable source. Islam on the other hand, has been preserved and protected by Allah and remains to be the exact same just as it was sent down to mankind. We don't believe in the trinity or associate partners to Allah in anyway because He is above all of that; Islam is strictly based on monotheism.

[Hamayun]

You seem like a very sincere person. I like you. You have a sort of peace about yourself that radiates, I hope that makes sense?
I trust you about that website.
But going into a mosque... I want to but I don't. Odd, I know, but I quess I'm scared.
I still have the phone number of one of my old work buddies. He was a Muslim. I used to poke fun of him, but he took it all very well. I'll phone him later, see if he fancies a pint and a chat.
I'm sorry about my anger in the previous posts. I find that if I'm alone for any lenght of time I dwell on things. I probably get it all out of preportion. But last night I cried for ages, untill I was so weak. I've never done that before. It's given me a massive headache, but the release was benificial.

We do all die at some time. But I guess I just didn't want to know when and so painfully! It's scary. But I will fight for every last breath. And I will try to forgive everyone. I might phone my adoptive mother today, too. Maybe that will be a good place to start. I actually feel good about that, like it would be the best thing to do.

Brother I am so happy that you are thinking more positively now.

Please don't be afraid of walking into the Mosque. I know it can be very scary but trust me. You will find people who will go out of their way to make you feel comfortable. Explain your situation to an Imaam.

Speaking to your Muslim friend is a very good idea. Please do let us know how you get on :)

May Allah's peace and mercy be upon you.

[Dawud_uk]

May I ask you something?
I was brought up in the Christian faith so I have a loose understanding of their old testament.
Are Muslims the descendants of Abraham?

many of the arabs are the literal descendents of Abraham, from his first born son ishmael (peace be upon them both), the prophet muhammad (pbuh) being the most famous such decendent.

but all muslims are following the same message of abraham, to preach the message of monotheism, indeed we claim every prophet of God is muslim, they are all following the islam of their day.

Ibrahim was not a Jew nor a Christian but he was (an) upright (man), a Muslim, and he was not one of the polytheists.
Quran 3:67

a Muslim is a person submitting to God, coming from the route word in arabic meaning to submit, so islam is the way of submission to God and a muslim is a person who submits.

[NazariteofEhyah]

I have always known that I was adopted. But a week ago I found that I am terminally ill with cancer. I have roughly six months to live.
My adoptive mother felt it was necessary for me to know the truth about who I am. My real parents were Muslims. They were found murdered by Christian fanatics in Turkey. I am 37 years old. I have been living a life as a British Christian all these years all because of a lie! I am so angry towards Christians. I am a Muslim by birth, by inheritance. And I have no time to live as a Muslim.
I want to die for Allah.

Shalama,

We should never allow personal agenda's to gain the advantage over love for fellow man. Did you never ask earlier? Do not demonise the Christians for all man has fallen short. Don't you know that wrong does correct wrong? Your behavior only proves man's fallen nature. Pick yourself up and rekindle yourself for your parents honour. I say this, as grace, for the LORD also exercises grace.

[Yanal]

Asalam Alaykum
Welcome. I'm so sorry to hear about cancer but please try to pray most of the time. In a way you're lucky because you know when you're going to roughly die and can repent etc not like most of us. So think of that and have optisim in you're heart and brain. And may Allah grant you heaven! Ameen.