wa alaykum us-salaam.
format_quote Originally Posted by
AnonymousGender
:sl:
now,its my turn to graduate from high school and i think its only fair for me to get the same privalage they got after graduating form high school.i havnt been the best daughtert heyve had ,actually im by far the most troubled child theyve had but i come with my positive aspects as well.
they school i want to attend is not in the country im living with and they have disagreed to let me attend,so my next option is the college my sister is going to at the moment.i applied for summer classes,therefore i can get ahead InshAllah.
i understand you wanting to get what your siblings got-totally-but sis if your parents don't want you to, then really, its cos they care. trust me, you may not see it now, but over time when you become a parent your self inshallah, then you probz would make the same decisions with your own kid.
its doesnt matter what your siblings get and you dont, at the end of the day you have to please your parents, so have patience and don't loose sight of that, cos its the most important :) good things come to those who wait :thumbs_up<---also keep that in mind :)
my parents dont want me to move there at all.they actually wont even let me go there or spend the night at my cousins house. you might think this isnt a big deal but my cousins house is our second home.my father doenst like us spending the night at anyones house and i understand but its liek we are stuck here.theres nothing to do and all our freinds live in the same area as my cousin,as well as all the Masjids we attend and all the family we basically have live in that area,therefore i find it very hard and fraustrating that we have to stay at home all the time
we live almost the exact same way as you, only without the cousins. my parents are exactly the same (even if there are no boys around)...call it over protective :D :statisfie
its not like im trying to move in with some of my teenage friends.and recently some boy who happens to be my younger brothers "friend" ask my bro for my number and my Mother found out.i think thats the reason they dont want me to move there since he lives in the same building but they havnt made it obvious at all.
everytime i bring it up,my Mothers says thats y these boys want to talk to you an dall because theyve seen you over there ect...what make it even worse is that im not that kind of person at all.i dont even enjoy talking to boys or even thinking about those kind o fthings.
flip if some guy tried getting my daughters no. flip i'd gun him down :p your mother let him go way too easily. she every right to fear for you.
you know sis, even when parents trust you-and im sure your parents trust you heaps-there is still gna be cautious about those who you hang out with.
for example with me, i was never allowed to see non-Muslim friends out of school hours. my mum knew i wasn't like that, but she still refused because she didnt trust them.
and the same with some Muslim friends of ours. we have a friend here whom my mum known for ages so yeah she pretty such loves her. but unfortunately her daughters don't observe hijab. my mum knows we wouldn't do anything crazy, but again, she fears their influence on us...
so your mum probs just fears of the influence of those around you...as
every mother does.
you wanna know what your prob is? it is that you see moving out and living with your cousin as something fun and freedom gaining which im sure it is but because your parents dont agree, you seem to think that its a restriction of your freedom, right?
so what you need to do, is change that and see the world from their eyes for a sec...
they see it that you're young, and that your gna move out with your cousin and that means alot of fun for you so much so that you may loose mind of what you should be doing there and since there are no adults around-in this case themselves-than your iman may slide down a bit. (every parent thinks like this!)
when you see the world from thier eyes, you will realise that there are not trying to burden you, when in reality all their doing is taking care of you :statisfie
you want to be set free and do things your way from an early age, but your parents ideas conflict that of your own, and this is why you are seeing your parents as unfair <---you need to be much more patient with them and respect and trust that they have your best interests at heart.
that aside, the world is really scary without your parents anyway :exhausted stay with your parents :D
anyway the point is i dont know what to do anymore.i dont wnat this little stunt to ruin my chances of moving in with my cousin.im a relgious person and my Parents do see that but they constantly say taht im just acting relgious and
i dont even no ho wto respect my parents
maybe you do know how to, but you dont realise it.
ever since they said that ive been trying my best to be pateint and obey my Parnets.when ever i argue or yell back at them or disobey them i feel extremely guity to the point that i do actually cry (keep in mind that im not a emotional person at all) and i ask Allah (SWA) for forgiveness but then i find myslef in teh same postion over and over again
alhamdulillah! you need to avoid getting angry at them tho<--- deeeeeead important! keep in mind the same way you treat your parents, is the same way your kids will treat you :)
i want some freedom.is that a bad thing?
i just don't think they understand me at all.i want to have some freedom,
getting away from your parents does
not mean freedom! you can be free without moving out of home. no offense intended, but your idea of freedom is
extremely narrow here.
i want to obey my Parents at all times,i realy sincerly do but they just dont want to meet me half way.
i feel like they aremaking it extremly difficult for me to obey them.
or perhaps you need to exercise more patience?
do what they say
is it wrong for me to want to move out?
no, but if they dont want you to, then yes it is...
do i have a right or say when it comes to this?
at the end of the day, no. but you could try to compromise, etc get someone else to talk to them...