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nada
06-05-2009, 09:11 PM
im muslim girl ,im embarrassed to write this story but ...
im in love with someone , nice muslim , living in uk , and im in other country in africa , we want to marry but there is a problem , he is simple person he has small job , its difficult for him to travel till my country to meet my parents and marry me, we dont want ceremony , we dont think about spending money in party or wedding dress or even rings , because those things are not important than being together in halal.
we suffer much , we want to live with each other as soon as possible ,
i hope someone can help us !

i had courage to write about this strory after hearing in islamic programm they talked about how much its good to help young couples to marry because u help them to live in halal and build a family , u help them to protect them selves ...

we both try to save some money, but as he has very small job and im jobless so ... i study and at the same time i try to make things and sell them , but it works slowly ... and our families are not rich ... sometimes we feel hopeless and depressive

our wish is to marry this summer inchAllah

jazakoum Allah khayr
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transition?
06-06-2009, 04:00 AM
"..... And whoever fears Allah- Allah will provide for him a means of deliverance." 65:2

:sl:
InshaAllah everything will go well in the end
If you are relying on Allah (swt), why despair ? He is Sustainer of the Universe.
What the ayat above tells us it that if we keep with our duties and fear Allah, He will provide his believers with a way, a window or door. Although we may not see the door opening, Allah (swt) Knows best and All.

Our test is patience, only so that we may reap its rewards, which are limitless :). An mment of struggle for the believer is an OPPORTUNITY to display our strength of character, raise our positions in Heaven, and our status in front of Allah's eyes.
Best are the Muslims affairs, you should be unhappy if your wntire life is going perfectly !
The solution to life's problems is relying on Allah (swt), knowing He Knows Best... What's best for you!!

Have Sabr, patience. Its reward is limitless!!Allah does what is good for believers, He knows what is Best, though we may not see it.

As long as everything is kept halal, only good things can come and even if some bad may befall you, sister, remember, it's better to be relieved of sins in a driving life than share an eternal abode in Hellfire. No bad befalls a Muslim that a sin will not be expiated for.'

Take care sister
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Snowflake
06-06-2009, 09:55 AM
Get both of your parents to discuss the matter and if everything is fine, do nikah over the fone, fax, even webcam? I wonder if that'd be a first? :D :p

But you both have to be patient and he should look for a better job. I'm not saying this about your fiance, but there are jobs in the UK which pay good money, some people think it's above them to do it. The opportunities are there if you look for them. So first things first... Nikah, job and bringing you over as his wife. And don't forget to make dua for Allah to help you in everything. :)
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nada
06-07-2009, 01:03 AM
thank u sisters, plz do dua for us , plz
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nada
06-07-2009, 03:01 PM
plz everyone do dua for us :cry:
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Muslim Woman
06-07-2009, 03:21 PM
:sl:

format_quote Originally Posted by nada
plz everyone do dua for us :cry:
Sis , don't be sad , cheer up , InshaAllah everytthing will be ok :statisfie

Hope u offered Ishkhara salat already. Why not talk to your parents & relatives & friends ? If u get married over phone & all sponsor ur air ticket , will it be possible to start your new life in UK ?
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nada
06-07-2009, 09:03 PM
salamo alaykum sister
is it possible to marry through phone ? i have never imagined that exist!!!!!
well for my family , i told them that he cant come actually as he doesnt have possibilities , my family is so small , my relatives are not poeple who will help me im sure , because i know them well, and friends, i dont have true friends who can support me, when i talk about the subject i hear negative thoughs ...
i dont find help thats why i thought about writing to muslims around the world, especially when i have heard that rich muslims can help young couples in this topic , even if they are poor , if they take this first step and marry, after that they can support each other and build a family together .

for salat istikhara i did !

i know we need sabr , thats why i ask u all to help me with dua , plz ask Allah to give us sabr , and ask HIM to help us to be with each other very soon. plz if u do salat in the last third of night, plz remember me , just one dua from heart , plz!!!

sisters , im 31 , sometimes i feel tired , i see all girls i know and younger than me get marrried or already married and having kids.
at my school, one day i have heard poeple talking about me and my age and wondering why im not married, poeple here judge each other without knowing the reality , and sometimes i feel tired .
other thing, its normal , im human and i have needs (u understand what i mean) but respecting my religion i try to protect my self, but its like war inside me ...
i ask Allah rahmah
plz sisters do many dua for both of us , plz ask Allah that He unite us soon and make us happy
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nada
06-08-2009, 03:43 PM
salam all
talking about marrying by phone , parents wont be agree , they want to meet the person face to face because they have never met him before, for them he is stranger so...
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Snowflake
06-08-2009, 06:07 PM
salamo alaykum sister
is it possible to marry through phone ? i have never imagined that exist!!!!!
I have to get back to you on that sis. I always knew it to be permissable but from a recent search I've found it isn't. However that being said, it is only not allowed as two witnesses are needed in a marriage contract. By that it must mean the 'visible' kind, who can see both parties agree to the marriage contract. As this is not possible on the phone, some scholars have deemed it impermissable. But, if the witnesses can view the marriage contract performed by both sides, e.g. through a webcam, then I don't see why the contract won't be valid. But like I said I need a scholar to verify that.


i dont find help thats why i thought about writing to muslims around the world, especially when i have heard that rich muslims can help young couples in this topic , even if they are poor , if they take this first step and marry, after that they can support each other and build a family together .
Sister, if you wait for something like that to happen, you could be waiting until your 50. Even then, there's more chances of Bush reverting to Islam. InshaAllah.

As, I said before sis, there are job out there if your fiance really wants, he can be there in 6 months. People take two jobs when they have to. Put it this way - where there's a will - there's a way!

I think your parents are right and he should at least visit your family once. Keep making Istikhara sis. I pray Allah makes it easy for if he is good for your deen and akhirah and turn him away from you if he is not. Ameen.
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Sampharo
06-08-2009, 06:09 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by nada
salam all
talking about marrying by phone , parents wont be agree , they want to meet the person face to face because they have never met him before, for them he is stranger so...
Well at least for official matters it needs to be in person. Groom and bride and bride's guardian and witnesses need to produce identification so the judge or the person marrying you knows who's marrying who, otherwise by phone or email it could be a joke from pranksters, and witnessing will not be authenticated.

Be patient sister and when it's something this important, I think that you can expect your groom-to-be to be financially capable of flying a single trip to his bride, otherwise marriage is gonna be hard. Also if you have met this person online, I cannot warn you enough about it! Long-distance relationships are incredibly deceptive, and romantic emotions can reach exaggerated heights that will crash and burn upon one on one meeting.

Anyway sister I hope you get the best in life.
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nada
06-08-2009, 09:49 PM
salamo alaykum
first i want to thank u all to give me part from ur time ; thanks
i feel i have brothers and sis everywhere who can advice me and wish nice things for me .
u are all nice poeple , just do many dua for our happiness me and him , inchAllah

Allah makes u happy too
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nada
06-15-2009, 01:16 PM
i want to start any business that can help me to save some money , im thinking about selling things from my country to uk , can any one help me in that ?
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nada
06-17-2009, 06:19 PM
salaamo alaykum

i feel helpless and hopeless , i lost even my energy that i had inside me , i feel like dead.

i dont know what to say

i did many efforts today with him , but i see he is more depressive , i dont know what to do ...
now , i feel this topic makes him tired , when we talk about it , he says: im tired and he goes .

one thing : i dont talk with him about it everyday , but sometimes i try to open the topic to think together about solutions , but ...
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sister herb
06-18-2009, 05:52 AM
:sl:

Please don´t lost your hope, dear sister. I know how you feel as I am now in same situation with my fiancee: we was planning to marry next month but now it seems we haven´t enough money to meet at that time. He is from Africa and I from Europe so our distance is quite long too. It makes us tired and depressed and sad - but not hopeless.

Trust that Allah will helps you both to resolve your problems and believe me, He will. You just need same than us - be patient and be ready to make more work for succesfull end.

And don´t forget to make dua. I and my fiancee will also make dua for you.

your sister in Islam
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nada
06-18-2009, 01:26 PM
thank u sister for ur dua, i make dua for u also,ur situation is like us, im in africa and he is in europe.
ur reply touched me deeply in my heart and made my tears come out
Allah send to us rahmah
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nada
08-07-2009, 07:24 PM
i need ur dua in this month and ramadan
plzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzzimsad
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