Help Needed - Soul Is Dying

[AnonymousPoster]

Salaam, I need some advice on how to regain confidence. my life is in tatters

I'm young with everything to look forward to but i have no confidence, no motivation in life. I'm wrecked. The person i was 5 years ago no longer exists. I have cut myself off from everyone, I'm reluctant to speak to anyone....a total shambles

I tried reading Namaz, I tried to go to the mosque but i cant, i don't know why but i feel scared, ashamed to pray to my lord. I'm a total disgrace.

I'm a born Muslim yet i act like a kafir. In fact do not regard myself as a Muslim anymore. I'm going crazy

Have nothing left in me, i feel weak dead, useless and dumb... literally on my last legs. 5 years of misery and pain. I want to be my own person, be a good Muslim.

So down the dumps one cannot understand, The past is so hard to let go. i have so much anger for those who have ruined me. So much anger if i ever saw them again i would do something stupid.

I want to follow how our beloved Prophet Muhammad PBUH, the best of creation conducted himself and please Allah SWT, Our ultimate goal in life yet i am so far from it :( Its like a million miles away

I am damaged mentally and i don't know if i will ever recover :( What we see with our eyes can damage one forever......:cry:

Any advice would be appreciated, someone who is into in dealing with issues like this please PM me. I need help urgently

By the end of this year InshAllah.. My goal is to be a new person

:wasalamex

[IslamicRevival]

Bump

[Raudha]

:sl:

I'm so sorry to hear about your situation. PLease do not despair, it is not too late.

Allah says in the Quraan: "Call unto me (and) I will answer you".

He also says: "Say: Oh My servants who have transgressed against their souls! Despair not of the Mercy of God: for God forgives all sins: for He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful. Turn to your Lord (in repentance) and bow to His (will), before the Penalty comes on you: after that you shall not be helped. And follow the best of (the courses) revealed to you from your Lord, before the Penalty comes on you - of a sudden, while you perceive not! Lest the soul should (then) say: 'Ah!Woe is me! - In that I neglected (my duty) towards God, and was but among those who mocked!' Or (lest) it shouldsay: 'If only God had guided me, I should certainly have been among the righteous!' Or (lest) it should say when it actually sees the Penalty: 'If only I had annother chance, I should certainly be among those who do good!' (The reply will be): "Nay, but there came to you My Signs, and you did reject them: you were haughty, nd became one of those who reject Faith!" (Al Quraan 39:53-59)

These verses are particularly touching for me, personally, and I hope that they will have an effect on you as well InshaAllah.

I also heard that you should read "Subhanallah" 100 times daily in order to soften your heart. I'm not sure how authentic it is and I hope someone can provide proof for that. But eve if it is ot authentic, "actions are judged by their intentions"(from Prophet Muhammad (SAW)) and you're reward will just increase by reading it.

May Allah have mercy on you and all of us and may He bless us all with strong Imaan and Jannatul Fidaus.Ameen

[s3ns3l3ss p3ace]

i cant send u pm im halfmember :D hehe

Hey there! Looks like you're enjoying the discussion, but you're not signed up for an account.

When you create an account, you can participate in the discussions and share your thoughts. You also get notifications, here and via email, whenever new posts are made. And you can like posts and make new friends.
Sign Up

[AnonymousPoster]

Over 20,000 users yet only 3 replies albeit 1 which is on the point? Thanks to those who have responded

[redblackmask]

Look,

I COMPLETELY understand what you are going through. I went through what you were going through for 7 years, though. You need to practice your faith more. You need to believe in yourself more. Things might seem like a million miles away, but try to balance out ALL the attributes in your life, and when the time comes, things will be within your reach.

I know it might seem hard for you to read this, just remember this. Live your life in harmony and balance, live out your faith, believe in yourself, and live with time as it passes. Everything will be fine, man.

[أبو سليمان عمر]

asalam wa alaykum
first u have to remeber All that has happened is a test u have to be patient pls read this inshallah it will help
http://www.islamicboard.com/advice-s...ess-faith.html

[Abu Hannah]

Return to Allah in all your deeds....

[Nihila]

This is a tough one, no doubt.

You mention the eyes seeing something...what exactly was it that you saw/experienced that made your world begin to collapse? What happened 5 years ago? I only ask because its very possible that therapy of some sort could help.

You also say that you're afraid of practising...recognise that this is Shaytaan's whisperings. We all too often tell ourselves that God will be angry if we do certain things, we will feel his wrath etc etc, we begin to despair because we make so many mistakes, then it becomes difficult to pray and remember him...We forget that the very first thing God told us in the Qu'ran is of his mercy and compassion. Try to remember God in a positive light. He is beautiful, the most merciful, the most compassionate. All He asks of us is that we return to Him...

When you begin to realise the love that God gives His servants, the amount that He has bestowed upon you, your confidence will begin to reappear. Believe me, I have been there! When you sit and think about it, take into account everything you have and everything around you...its incredible. People doubt God all the time, they commit sin and hurt other people...and yet God waits patiently for them to return to Him; he keeps giving them another chance.

You will change, it doesnt matter that youre not the same person you were 5 years ago. You have the ability to change again; to become better than the person you were 5 years ago InshaAllah.

Every day is an opportunity for you to turn your life around; every day is a new beginning. Seize it!

[Eric H]

Greetings and peace be with you AnonymousGender;

The past is so hard to let go. i have so much anger for those who have ruined me. So much anger if i ever saw them again i would do something stupid.

Some injustice has happened, maybe the death of someone, maybe to do with relationships, the chances are that justice will never be served, and the guilty persons will seem to walk away free. Anger burns away when you are on your own, and at night time, it is all consuming, and separates you from God.

You can never change the past, you can only change how it affects the present.

Anger is like picking up a burning coal with the intention of throwing it at the person you are angry with, but the person who gets burned the most is yourself. The longer you hold onto your anger, the hotter the coal in your hand becomes, and the pain will become more intense.

Often you feel powerless to do anything to the person you are angry with and your anger has to go somewhere. Sometimes it just consumes and burns away inside, at other times you become angry with those people around you, often friends and family, and they are the people who suffer, through no fault of their own.

The perpetrator controls your mind, you are not in control, they consume your thoughts, they own you, and there is nothing you can do about it.

Unless you can forgive them fully and totally, pray for your peace, pray for peace for them, pray that God will also forgive them. Pray for your own forgiveness.

Look at examples of extreme forgiveness of your prophet pbuh,

read the post by Gossamer Skye

Another great quality of Muhammad was that he never took revenge on anyone for personal reasons and always forgave even his firm enemies. His wife `A'ishah reported that Allah's Messenger was not unseemly or obscene in his speech, nor was he loud-voiced in the streets, nor did he return evil for evil, but he would forgive and pardon. The people of the Quraysh rebuked him, taunted and mocked at him, beat him and abused him. They tried to kill him and when he escaped to Madinah, they waged many wars against him. Yet when he entered Makkah victorious with an army of 10000, he did not take revenge on anyone. He forgave all. Even his deadliest enemy, Abu Sufyan, who had fought so many battles against him, was forgiven, as was anyone who stayed in his house. `Abdullah ibn Ubayy, the leader of the hypocrites of Madinah, worked all his life against Muhammad and Islam and left no stone in trying to defeat his mission. He withdrew his three hundred supporters in the Battle of Uhud, which almost broke the backbone of the Muslims. He engaged in intrigues and acts of hostility against the Prophet of Islam and the Muslims. He tried to discredit Allah’s Messenger by spreading slander about his wife `A’ishah. About this incident Almighty Allah says: "Lo! They who spread the slander are a gang among you. Deem it not a bad thing for you; nay, it is good for you. Unto every man of them will be paid that which he has earned of the sin; and as for him among them who had the greater share therein, his will be an awful doom." (An-Nur: 11) Yet Muhammad forgave him and offered his funeral prayer and prayed Allah to forgive `Abdullah. But afterwards, Allah revealed: "And never (O Muhammad) pray for one of them who dies, nor stand by his grave. Lo! They disbelieve in Allah and His Messenger, and they died while they were evil doers." (At-Tawbah: 84)
An Abyssinian slave who had killed Muhammad’s beloved uncle Hamzah in the Battle of Uhud was also forgiven when he embraced Islam after the victory of Makkah. The wife of Abu Sufyan, who had cut open Hamzah’s chest and torn his liver and heart into pieces in the Battle of Uhud, quietly came to the Prophet and accepted Islam. He recognized her but did not say anything. She was so impressed by his magnanimity and stature that she said, "O Allah's Messenger, no tent was more deserted in my eyes than yours; but today no tent is more lovely in my eyes than yours."
Habar ibn al-Aswad was another vicious enemy of Muhammad and of Islam. He had inflicted a grievous injury to Zaynab, daughter of the Prophet. She was pregnant when she emigrated from Makkah to Madinah. The polytheists of Makkah obstructed her and Habar ibn al-Aswad intentionally threw her down from the camel. She was badly hurt and miscarried as a result. Habar committed many other crimes as well. He wanted to run away to Persia but then he came to Muhammad, who forgave him.
Muhammad was all for forgiveness and no amount of crime or aggression against him was too great to be forgiven by him. He was the complete example of forgiveness and kindness, as mentioned in the following verse of the Qur'an: "Keep to forgiveness (O Muhammad), and enjoin kindness, and turn away from the ignorant." (Al-A`raf: 199)
He always repelled evil with good, for, in his view, an antidote was better than poison. He believed and practiced the precept that love could foil hatred and aggression could be won over by forgiveness. He overcame the ignorance of the people with the knowledge of Islam, and the folly and evil of the people with his kind and forgiving treatment. With his forgiveness, he freed people from the bondage of sin and crime, and also made them great friends of Islam. He was an exact image of the following verse of the Qur'an: "Good and evil are not alike. Repel evil with what is better. Then he, between whom and you there was hatred, will become as though he was a bosom frie

In the spirit of praying for an inner peace that surpasses all understanding.

Eric

[AnonymousPoster]

This is a tough one, no doubt.

You mention the eyes seeing something...what exactly was it that you saw/experienced that made your world begin to collapse? What happened 5 years ago? I only ask because its very possible that therapy of some sort could help.

You also say that you're afraid of practising...recognise that this is Shaytaan's whisperings. We all too often tell ourselves that God will be angry if we do certain things, we will feel his wrath etc etc, we begin to despair because we make so many mistakes, then it becomes difficult to pray and remember him...We forget that the very first thing God told us in the Qu'ran is of his mercy and compassion. Try to remember God in a positive light. He is beautiful, the most merciful, the most compassionate. All He asks of us is that we return to Him...

When you begin to realise the love that God gives His servants, the amount that He has bestowed upon you, your confidence will begin to reappear. Believe me, I have been there! When you sit and think about it, take into account everything you have and everything around you...its incredible. People doubt God all the time, they commit sin and hurt other people...and yet God waits patiently for them to return to Him; he keeps giving them another chance.

You will change, it doesnt matter that youre not the same person you were 5 years ago. You have the ability to change again; to become better than the person you were 5 years ago InshaAllah.

Every day is an opportunity for you to turn your life around; every day is a new beginning. Seize it!

Salaam, First of all thank you for the response :)

Lets just say i was young, naive and i fell into the trap of shaytan. I was left heartbroken and to this day i cannot get over it...Everything fell apart. I totally locked myself away and shunned everyone i knew..Then I began to 'explore' the Internet regrettably..Its ruined my life.

I'm beginning to realise how much this has affected me and I'm trying to get out of this vicious cycle.

To put it simply...I'm at a stage where i can hardly find the courage to go to the doctors. Its that bad.

[AnonymousPoster]

Greetings and peace be with you AnonymousGender;


Some injustice has happened, maybe the death of someone, maybe to do with relationships, the chances are that justice will never be served, and the guilty persons will seem to walk away free. Anger burns away when you are on your own, and at night time, it is all consuming, and separates you from God.

You can never change the past, you can only change how it affects the present.

Anger is like picking up a burning coal with the intention of throwing it at the person you are angry with, but the person who gets burned the most is yourself. The longer you hold onto your anger, the hotter the coal in your hand becomes, and the pain will become more intense.

Often you feel powerless to do anything to the person you are angry with and your anger has to go somewhere. Sometimes it just consumes and burns away inside, at other times you become angry with those people around you, often friends and family, and they are the people who suffer, through no fault of their own.

The perpetrator controls your mind, you are not in control, they consume your thoughts, they own you, and there is nothing you can do about it.

Unless you can forgive them fully and totally, pray for your peace, pray for peace for them, pray that God will also forgive them. Pray for your own forgiveness.

Look at examples of extreme forgiveness of your prophet pbuh,



In the spirit of praying for an inner peace that surpasses all understanding.

Eric

Thank you for that, You made some powerful points in your message

[Yanal]

:sl:
Wow I must say you must have been through a lot because you seem lost and puzzled about your religion when it is merly inside you,closest to you,it is in your blessed heart. Whatever you did in the past,now is the past and you must repent and move on thinking with a peaceful mind that Allah will inshAllah forgive me. If you repent sincerley inshAllah Allah The merciful will forgive you.

I do not know what you did to make yourself feel like that but I can tell it must be big. But how can it stop you from being a proper true Muslim? It should make you want to be a better muslim because whatever happens,happens for good and you must understand that. Bro/Sister though I am 90% sure you are a brother since you raised the topic of masjid. If you want you can PM me and I promise I will keep it a secret.

[Ali_008]

:sl:

Narrated by Abu Dharr from the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), he tells us that his Lord, may He be blessed and exalted, said: “O My slaves, they are merely your actions which I am recording for you, then I will requite you for them. Whoever finds it to be good, let him praise Allaah, and whoever finds it to be otherwise, let him blame no one but himself.” According to the saheeh hadeeth: “The best prayer for forgiveness is to say: ‘Allaahumma anta rabbiy laa ilaaha illa anta, khalaqtani wa ana ‘abduka wa ana ‘ala ‘ahdika wa wa’dika ma astata’tu, a’oodhu bika min sharri ma sana’tu aboo’u laka bi ni’matika ‘alayya wa aboo’u laka bi dhanbi, faghfir li fa innahu laa yaghfir ul-dhunooba illa anta (O Allaah, You are my Lord and I am Your slave, You have created me and I am faithful to my covenant and my promise (to You) as much as I am able. I seek refuge with You from the evil of that which I have done. I acknowledge before You all the blessings You have bestowed upon me and I confess to You my sin. Forgive me for there is no one who forgives sin except You).’ Whoever says this during the day believing in it with certainty and dies that day before evening comes, will be one of the people of Paradise, and whoever says it at night believing in it with certainty and dies before morning comes will be one of the people of Paradise.”

Source

So brother just understand the fact that whatever a person earns is because of what he does. I know its difficult to come to terms with the fact that you could commit so many mistakes but believe me I've seen that time but when I actually admitted my mistakes and turned to Allah, I actually witnessed his mercy.

The verse quoted by Sister Raudha of Surah Zumar :
53. Say: "O 'Ibadi (My slaves) who have transgressed against themselves (by committing evil deeds and sins)! Despair not of the Mercy of Allah, verily Allah forgives all sins. Truly, He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful

Keep that in mind and submit to Allah and you will find his never ending grace with you. Namaz/Salaah should not be a matter of fear to anyone but rather its a source of relief. If you're scared then its the waswaas (insinuating whispers) of Shaytaan and you know that the objective of this life is to defeat, overcome and humiliate shaytan. Go to the masjid and offer even Sunnah and Nafl prayers to frustrate the shaytan even more and gain Allah's blessings. Your problem is just struggling to defeat shaytan and with Allah's help, its very easy.

Your duration of trouble is 5 years for me it was a lot less i.e. 10 months but I compelely understand your problem. Blaming others never helps because if you did something wrong that means you did it, nobody forced you. Even if anyone did then you had the total authority and freedom to not do that thing and fight that person. Its a bitter medicine but just take it, you sinned. Now repent and Inshallah you'll be blessed with more than what you were 5 years ago.

May Allah guide you,strengthen your eemaan and accept your repentance and forgive all of us. Ameen

[ghengis]

???

[brotherubaid]

Allah loves those who repent. n turn back to Him n return to Him.

You need to start with asking lots of forgivness n repentence. it will clear ur heart , open ur chest , purify ur soul.

Know ur lord , know how much He loves us n cares for us , how much He has blessed us.
Know his mercy n know his rewards , remmeber his meeting , remmeber the day when we shall all be brought back to him n made to stand in front of him. Know his beautiful names n his attributes, let ur heart roam in this beautiful garden of knowing ur lord.

Fall in love with him , n then everthing will become easy , you will start loving for the sake of Allah those who love Allah n Hate for the sake of Allah those who do worng n are enemies of Allah , you will swith parties, leave the party of Shaytaan, and enter the party of Allah.

Its about the heart , the heart the heart .... its about love , love of Allah , his revelation his Prophet sala lahu alihi wa sallam.

“The keys to the life of the heart lie in reflecting upon the Qur‘aan , being humble before Allaah in secret, and leaving sins.” Ibn Qayyim al Jawziyyah rahimahullah …

Your life in the present moment is in between the past and the future. So what has preceded can be rectified by tawbah (repentance), nadam (regret) and istighfar (seeking Allaah’s forgiveness). And this is something that will neither tire you, nor cause you to toil as you would with strenuous labour. Rather it is an action of the heart. Then as regards the future (then it can be corrected) by withholding yourself from sins. And this abandonment is merely the leaving of something and to be at ease from it. This also is not action of the limbs, which requires you to strive and toil. Rather this is a firm resolve and intention of the heart – which will give rest to your body, heart and thoughts. So as for what has preceded, then you rectify it with repentance. And as for the future – then you rectify it with firm resolve and intention. Neither of these involves any hardship or exertion of the limbs. But then your attention must be directed to your life in the present – the time between two times. If you waste it, then you have wasted the opportunity to be of the fortunate and saved ones. If you look after it, having rectified the two times – what is before and after it, as we have said – then you will be successful and achieve rest, delight and ever-lasting bliss. However, looking after it is harder than that which comes before and after it, since guarding it involves keeping to that which is most befitting and beneficial for your soul, and that which will bring it success and well-being.

[Imam Ibn ul Qayyim al Jawziyyah - al-Fawaa’id, pp 151-152]


Know the reward of Allah, what He has prepared for those who feared him without ever seeing him.

Let ur past life n sins be a way for u to enter Jannah , How??
Except those who repent and believe
and do righteous deeds, for those, Allâh will change their sins into good deeds, and Allâh is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful. Al furqan 70
There u go! The more sins u have from past life the better, but with conditions though , true repentence n changing ur life around , believing n doing good deeds n not going back , n truly once u understand, you will hate to go back to sins n wrong, u will naturally find in ur heart hate for sins n the peole of sin, n find love for the good n people of good.

Ibn al-Qayyim - rahimahullâh - said:
One of the Salaf (Pious Predecessors) said: “Indeed a servant commits a sin by which he enters Paradise; and another does a good deed by which he enters the Fire.” It was asked: How is that? So he replied: “The one who committed the sin, constantly thinks about it; which causes him to fear it, regret it, weep over it and feel ashamed in front of his Lord the Most High - due to it. He stands before Allâh, broken-hearted and with his head lowered in humility. So this sin is more beneficial to him than doing many acts of obedience, since it caused him to have humility and humbleness - which leads to the servant’s happiness and success - to the extent that this sin becomes the cause for him entering Paradise. As for the doer of good, then he does not consider this good a favour from his Lord upon him. Rather, he becomes arrogant and amazed with himself, saying: I have achieved such and such, and such and such. So this further increases him in self-adulation, pride and arrogance - such that this becomes the cause for his destruction.”


One particularly cool Hadeeth as an example of this is recorded by Muslim (no.190) and At-Tirmithee (no. 2596) from Abu Tharr () that the Prophet () said:
“I certainly know who’ll be the last to enter Paradise and the last to be brought out of the Fire. He’s a man who will be brought on the Day of Resurrection and it’ll be said, ‘Present to him his minor sins and take away his major ones. So, his minor sins will be placed before him.’ He will be asked, ‘On this day, did you do this and that, and on that day did you do this and that?’ He’ll reply, ‘Yes.’ He won’t be able to deny. He’ll be terrified that his major sins will also be presented to him. He will then be told, ‘For you, every place of a sin will be replaced with a good deed.’ The man will then say, ‘Oh my Lord, I even did other things (sins) I don’t see here!’”
I (Abu Tharr) then saw Allaah’s Messenger () laughing so much that I could see his back molar teeth. [T.N]

here is something nice http://www.authentictranslations.com...orgiveness.pdf


Read the description of paradise by ibn al qayyim , read the ahadith about the last person to enter jannah , See how merciful ur lord is , Love him n " what ever u do , do for love" coz its easy to do things in love n to leave things in love. we need to start loving Allah , His book n his messenger .. Wallahi that is where u will find true peace n tranquility , Stand up , make a change , be strong , beat ur desires n lusts n what ever takes u away from ur lord , what ever has got between u n ur lord

O man! What has made you careless concerning your Lord, the Most Generous?(What has lured u away from ur lord)
Surah al infitar.

http://www.islaam.com/Article.aspx?id=58 a beautiful article by ibn al qayyim , causes that bring about the love of Allah.

And at the end know this .. ohh this is just beautiful..

SURAH AL HADID
20. Know that the life of this world is only play and amusement, pomp and mutual boasting among you, and rivalry in respect of wealth and children, as the likeness of vegetation after rain, thereof the growth is pleasing to the tiller; afterwards it dries up and you see it turning yellow; then it becomes straw. But in the Hereafter (there is) a severe torment (for the disbelievers, evil-doers), and (there is) Forgiveness from Allâh and (His) Good Pleasure (for the believers, good-doers), whereas the life of this world is only a deceiving enjoyment.

21. Race one with another(Compete one another) in hastening towards Forgiveness from your Lord (Allâh), and towards Paradise, the width whereof is as the width of heaven and earth, prepared for those who believe in Allâh and His Messengers. That is the Grace of Allâh which He bestows on whom He pleases. And Allâh is the Owner of Great Bounty.

22. No calamity befalls on the earth or in yourselves but is inscribed in the Book of Decrees (Al-Lauh Al-Mahfûz), before We bring it into existence. Verily, that is easy for Allâh.

23. In order that you may not be sad over matters that you fail to get, nor rejoice because of that which has been given to you. And Allâh likes not prideful boasters




Assalam O Alikum

[jpaladeen]

Wow take it easy on yourself! Everyone sins. Our iman goes up and down throughout life.

When we become angry about something, we want to let off steam by replacing the bad feelings with something pleasureable. The shayton knows this. Problem is the pleasureable feeling is temporary and the bad feelings will keep coming back and we keep trying to get rid of the feelings by repeating the pleasureable thing. Then you end up feeling worse because guilt is on top of the anger. Until you face the anger and quit trying to drown it or esccape it, you will be haunted by it and you will be driven to do the sinful thing.

This is where abstaining from the sinful thing and facing the anger is important. It is ok to be angry but what you do with the anger is the question. Of course, the shayton encourages you to seek revenge. He tells you it will make it all feel better. This is what drives people over the edge to do aweful things to others... they just want to emotionally feel better.

Now it is up to you to become better than you are and move beyond what someone else did to you. That is where prayer and reading Quran comes in. The shayton wants you to feel alone in your problems, stay away from other Muslims and the masjid. You need to go to the masjid. Read Aiyatul Kursi. Fasting until the anger goes away. Takes some time from work, school or whatever for yourself to re-energize and reflect on your life. Write your feelings down in a journal and make a list of goals for your life long term and short term. Pray on all of these things. Allah brings things full circle in life, he knows what you need and will heal your wounds if you will only ask for help.

[Eric H]

Greetings and peace be with you AnonymousGender; I hope you are well today.

Destiny
Douglas C Hess

Watch Your Thoughts, For They Become Words,
Choose Your Words, For They Become Actions,
Understand Your Actions, For They Become Habits. Become Your Character,
Develop Your Character, For It Becomes Your Destiny.
Study Your Habits, For They

If you think angry thoughts, it will lead you to speak angry words, do angry things and keep repeating them.

Find kind thoughts to replace angry thoughts, find ten things every day to thank God for, put those thoughts into words. Put your words into action by getting on with life despite all the past injustice and strive to live through Islam. Repeat these thoughts, words and actions daily and they become habits, which will form your character and destiny.

Life is a journey always trusting that our God holds us in the palm of his hand.

In the spirit of striving to find an inner peace that surpasses all understanding

Eric