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AnonymousPoster
06-14-2009, 03:28 AM
Salaam, Would you be angry if someone in your family continuously swore and treated your parents disrespectfully? So angry you would never talk to them and despise them regardless of their age?

Would you not feel so much anger you would want to totally disassociate with the individual in question? Even if you live under the same roof

Would you feel angry if someone in your family was copying everything you do, from the way you act to the way you sit?

I would say yes to all as i am in this situation, Am i paranoid or is this a normal reaction?

I'm finding it really hard to cope with such immature brats who think its OK to swear at their parents, I have to restrain myself from hitting them. It wrecks my day totally

Talking with them will not solve the issue as they would continue to do this, though not in front of me

Looking forward to replies

JazakAllah
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Ummu Sufyaan
06-14-2009, 11:36 AM
:sl:
Originally Posted by AnonymousGender
Salaam, Would you be angry if someone in your family continuously swore and treated your parents disrespectfully?
yes!!!!
So angry you would never talk to them and despise them regardless of their age?
if they were blood relatives, i wouldn't...but if they weren't i couldn't care less to hear of them again, quite frankly.
Would you not feel so much anger you would want to totally disassociate with the individual in question? Even if you live under the same roof
yes, but it depends on what they did.

Would you feel angry if someone in your family was copying everything you do, from the way you act to the way you sit?
yes

I would say yes to all as i am in this situation, Am i paranoid or is this a normal reaction?
no.


Talking with them will not solve the issue as they would continue to do this, though not in front of me
be kind to them in other ways build a good relationship with them, so that their heart softens and therefore when you talk to them, your advice may have more of a positive affect. make sure you stick up for your parents also!

also, talk to your parents about how your siblings deal with them, i.e get your parents to stand up to them..
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Sampharo
06-14-2009, 07:48 PM
Anger is a natural emotion, but it's one that should not be left to last. Get angry for your religion, absolutely and defend it vigorously. Get angry for injustice or for bad treatment of people you love and care about like your parents, and defend them, but don't let anger take over and become the devil's tool instead of yours.

Relatives of blood or marriage are required to be connected with every now and then at least with check ups as the prophet -pbuh- called for Silat Al-Rahim. You can't disassociate completely from the person when they're living in the same house as you.

Look, it's obvious you're talking about a bratty sibling (gotta a feeling it's your younger brother), so take it easy and don't do something you are not permitted to do. As for making you angry by annoying you and immitating you, it's practically in their DNA. Don't worry they grow out of it. Just cool it and teach that person they cannot behave like that over and over.

Good luck
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abdullah_001
06-14-2009, 08:09 PM
:sl:
Originally Posted by AnonymousGender
Salaam, Would you be angry if someone in your family continuously swore and treated your parents disrespectfully? So angry you would never talk to them and despise them regardless of their age?
No matter how upsetting it would be I wouldn't stop talking to them. Maybe one day or so if I was really upset but nothing more than that. If we didn't correct our family members then who will?

Originally Posted by AnonymousGender
Would you not feel so much anger you would want to totally disassociate with the individual in question? Even if you live under the same roof

Originally Posted by AnonymousGender
Would you feel angry if someone in your family was copying everything you do, from the way you act to the way you sit?
I would say the person in question here is really young. He maybe a little kid because little kids have a tendency to copy people they look up to. I wouldn't be angry, infact, I would use this as an opportunity to teach this someone about Quran, prayers, etc..

Originally Posted by AnonymousGender
I would say yes to all as i am in this situation, Am i paranoid or is this a normal reaction?
This shouldn't be a normal reaction at least to me because like I said if we don't show our young ones the right way then who will? We always have to forgive as we are seniors and overlook the faults in our younger siblings.

Originally Posted by AnonymousGender
I'm finding it really hard to cope with such immature brats who think its OK to swear at their parents, I have to restrain myself from hitting them. It wrecks my day totally

Talking with them will not solve the issue as they would continue to do this, though not in front of me

Looking forward to replies

JazakAllah
Just slap them, thats what I would do as an older brother. Some people may not like it but sometimes it is neccasary. If this person is really young then take him to the mosque, spend a lot of time with him everyday, give him a proper upbringing.

Inshallah, everything will turn alright, Inshallah.

Wallahi though, if I had a younger brother who copied everything I did, I would take this as a positive sign that my brother looks up to me and I would use this as an opportunity to instill in him all the right etiquettes of manners and religion that I could. This is your opportunity I would say and Inshallah make the best of it.
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Clover
06-14-2009, 08:12 PM
Originally Posted by AnonymousGender
Salaam, Would you be angry if someone in your family continuously swore and treated your parents disrespectfully? So angry you would never talk to them and despise them regardless of their age?

Would you not feel so much anger you would want to totally disassociate with the individual in question? Even if you live under the same roof

Would you feel angry if someone in your family was copying everything you do, from the way you act to the way you sit?

I would say yes to all as i am in this situation, Am i paranoid or is this a normal reaction?

I'm finding it really hard to cope with such immature brats who think its OK to swear at their parents, I have to restrain myself from hitting them. It wrecks my day totally

Talking with them will not solve the issue as they would continue to do this, though not in front of me

Looking forward to replies

JazakAllah
I would challenge them for their attacks, and tell them to either stop or face a fight, it's wrong for anyone to do that, especially if their family.

Um, idk, are you referring to like a little cousin? Not really, I'd just ignore him/her.

Eh, I don't see that at my families gatherings, or when with them, most of our family has a thing where, if your rude to the parents, the whole family gets at you. Unless, it's justified, then usually it's tolerated.
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