Dunno anymore

[anonymous]

:sl:

This girl I went to the same school with is now msging/emailing the brother I am suppose to be marrying soon! He tells me whenever she writes him, she keeps begging him to marry her. I really don't understand what kind of a Muslimah would do a such thing.

At first I didn't think badly of her, because I have known how much she loved him, but he never felt the same. I kind of understand that she really loves him, and wants him to feel the same. Now, this is turning into an 'obsession' she keeps using the new email addr's asking him 'please tell me why u rejected me'. Ignoring her won't work, that's why I was in favour of him writting her back...He told her that he's engaged, that she should fear Allah, that he's not interested.

Every now and then she will come up with something new, the most recent thing is: I am so happy for you both, u deserve the best, can I invite u to join this Islamic programme about UAE muslims or somthing?

I have complete trust in him, I am not a jealous person, but this is not going to stop. She even went to Turkey 'alone' against her parents wish, (because he's turkish)...Sending post cards to his parents here?

Should it bother me?

Any advice? jazakAllahkhayr.

[alcurad]

it should, end the matter quickly and permanently, he might get ideas after a while if this continues, not to mention her behavior is not to be tolerated, it's forbidden, and obviously so.

[crayon]

Eh.

Tell her to stop what she's doing, get over it, and get on with her life. Not only are her actions iffy, she's supposed to be your friend and sister in islam, not some girl who's trying to steal your fiance.

Get it all out there, talk to her, tell her how you feel, that she needs to stop, etc.
And I'm not saying be mean, just let her know exactly where you stand, that her actions are NOT okay.

[anonymous]

^she's not really my friend, It's just a person I know from school via people who know her. He told her how I feel about the things she does, but she doesn't seem to be taking my feelings into consideration though she claims she doesn't want to cause any problems between me and him. Her behaviour however is telling me a complete different story.

end the matter quickly and permanently,

How?

Crayon she knows where I stand, though I never had direct talk wit her, he told her how I feel. It obviously made no difference...

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[crayon]

Then I guess it's just up to your fiance to tell her to get lost- he needs to give her the cold shoulder and start ignoring her, she's not listening any other way. Not answer her calls, or emails, or on msn, facebook, whatever; it's up to him.

[Sunni Ninja]

maybe your hubby to be should change his email address or report her because what she is doing is obsession.. she needs to get over it... maybe your hubby to be needs to be more harsh with her.. or keep avoiding her im sure it will work some time..

May Allah give you more patience Ameen

mashAllah you have great courage and patience.. many other sisters would have probably rejected the proposal.. or become really jealous or angry..

[Ummu Sufyaan]

:sl:

Then I guess it's just up to your fiance to tell her to get lost- he needs to give her the cold shoulder and start ignoring her, she's not listening any other way. Not answer her calls, or emails, or on msn, facebook, whatever; it's up to him.

ditto :) or you personally should tell her to back off...

[anonymous]

Tell him to change his email ad, and if his facebook (or whatever new trend is out nowadays) is public, then that's an issue itself.

Do not make yourself public to the opposite gender. This means on MSN, facebook, Islamic forums.