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anonymous
07-12-2009, 05:47 PM
i found out something so disgusting and disgraceful about my younger brother, i dont even know what to do. i dont want to look at him. so what shalll i do? should i tell my mum.? or should i keep it to myself. ive asked my friends and they just advised me to speak to my mum, but it will break her. but if i do then wont i get sinned as i should be covering his sins. im so confused. whats the islamic ruling on this kind of stuff. and btw i cant speak to him myself, theres no point trying or anything of the sort... :(
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anonymous
07-12-2009, 06:04 PM
please someone reply quickk pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee :( :( :(
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جوري
07-12-2009, 06:06 PM
Did you find this by lawful means or were you being sneaky yourself and breaking Allah's commandments of not spying on others? Your answer should lie in how honestly you answer this Q!
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Ansariyah
07-12-2009, 06:08 PM
Allahs Messenger (peace be upon him) said: "He, who relieves a hardship of this Dunya (world) for a believer, Allah will relieve (from him) a hardship of the Day of Resurrection; he who makes easy an indebted person, Allah will make it easy for him in the Dunya and the Hereafter; he who covers a Muslim (meaning his mistakes and shortcomings) , Allah will cover him in the Dunya and the Hereafter " [Sahih Muslim]
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جوري
07-12-2009, 06:11 PM
^^ well said yanoorha.
A Muslim should advise and support, not backstab and hurt...
also I am still waiting to hear on whether this was found out by lawful means?
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anonymous
07-12-2009, 06:12 PM
i was being sneaky. but kind of not. i am not justifying how i found out. but i kind of knew it before but not confirmed. i cant explain. the sotory is long. i know about that ayah. but wtf dop i do man. its not that black and white. :@:@ im so confused
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Yanal
07-12-2009, 06:12 PM
:salamext:
Try this site brother/sister as it explains an extended version of that stated hadeeth above^.
http://www.ahya.org/amm/modules.php?name

:w:
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جوري
07-12-2009, 06:15 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by anonymous
i was being sneaky.
That is all I wanted to know ..

49:12 O ye who believe! avoid suspicion as much (as possible): for suspicion in some cases is a sin: and spy not on each other, nor speak ill of each other behind their backs. Would any of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? Nay, ye would abhor it. But fear Allah: for Allah is Oft-Returning, Most-Merciful.


also your use of 'WTF' doesn't make you any better.. I can see you are not much better than you allege your brother with such manners...
pls forgive me for being harsh, but you should start with yourself before looking to the faults of others and exploiting it in a public fashion.. what do you hope to gain? will your brother be better after you've ratted him out? or will he resent you and not heed your advise?

:w:
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Banu_Hashim
07-12-2009, 06:16 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Yanoorah
Allahs Messenger (peace be upon him) said: "He, who relieves a hardship of this Dunya (world) for a believer, Allah will relieve (from him) a hardship of the Day of Resurrection; he who makes easy an indebted person, Allah will make it easy for him in the Dunya and the Hereafter; he who covers a Muslim (meaning his mistakes and shortcomings) , Allah will cover him in the Dunya and the Hereafter " [Sahih Muslim]
Agreed. Allah doesn't like the sins of Muslims to be exposed.
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anonymous
07-12-2009, 06:16 PM
it doesnt wrk :(
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anonymous
07-12-2009, 06:19 PM
you guys dont get it. what he has done is far worse than what i have done by finding it out. im not being spiteful. that is not my intention.
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جوري
07-12-2009, 06:24 PM
I think we all understand the definition of sins and we know it runs the gamut, I don't know however if you understand the meaning of the verses and ahadith here.. Are you God to judge? if Allah means for him to be punished for his egregious sins, he'll find a way to expose him by lawful means and not by way of another sin .. perhaps Allah swt is giving him a chance to repent and you to be a better Muslim...

I hope you understand, I never took kindly to people who speak poorly of their kin. so perhaps I am biased in that regard but you did ask for a fast reply, and my reply is given.. if you don't like it, then perhaps you didn't want a reply to begin with, since everyone here seems to be giving you an opinion along the same lines!

:w:
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anonymous
07-12-2009, 06:27 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Gossamer skye
That is all I wanted to know ..

49:12 O ye who believe! avoid suspicion as much (as possible): for suspicion in some cases is a sin: and spy not on each other, nor speak ill of each other behind their backs. Would any of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? Nay, ye would abhor it. But fear Allah: for Allah is Oft-Returning, Most-Merciful.


also your use of 'WTF' doesn't make you any better.. I can see you are not much better than you allege your brother with such manners...
pls forgive me for being harsh, but you should start with yourself before looking to the faults of others and exploiting it in a public fashion.. what do you hope to gain? will your brother be better after you've ratted him out? or will he resent you and not heed your advise?

:w:

how dare you judge me like that? excuse yourself. how can you even compare me to what he has done. if i wanted to exploit it in a public fashion, i would have posted this up on my username and broadcasted it exactly how low you think i am? harsh? it disgusts me that i come here on thisfor advise and get criticised from people like yourself. look i am NOT justifying what i have done to find out, you dont know me to make a freaking comment like that. i'm not trying to 'rat' him out. do you not get that i need advise hence i come post this? and what a wickad person you are, tryna level up two VERY different sins and saying i'm as wurse than him, even though you dont know what he has done.
are you giving advise? lol. funny.
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anonymous
07-12-2009, 06:30 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Gossamer skye
I think we all understand the definition of sins and we know it runs the gamut, I don't know however if you understand the meaning of the verses and ahadith here.. Are you God to judge? if Allah means for him to be punished for his egregious sins, he'll find a way to expose him by lawful means and not by way of another sin .. perhaps Allah swt is giving him a chance to repent and you to be a better Muslim...

I hope you understand, I never took kindly to people who speak poorly of their kin. so perhaps I am biased in that regard but you did ask for a fast reply, and my reply is given.. if you don't like it, then perhaps you didn't want a reply to begin with, since everyone here seems to be giving you an opinion along the same lines!

:w:
did i say i am GOD? wth is wrong with people like you? so quick to tap a few keys and post stuff like this up? i wanted to UNDERSTAND the ayah, hence why i asked this question. why do you think so ill of people?
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alcurad
07-12-2009, 06:36 PM
so, what did he do that's so disgusting etc?
if it affects someone other than him, you should be very concerned, try to council/advise in the best way you see fit to, or bring it up to someone who can actually help.
if it doesn't concern anyone other than him, it's your duty still to offer him help and support, if you can't talk to him normally about it, do it indirectly.
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جوري
07-12-2009, 06:38 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by anonymous
how dare you judge me like that? excuse yourself. how can you even compare me to what he has done. if i wanted to exploit it in a public fashion, i would have posted this up on my username and broadcasted it exactly how low you think i am? harsh? it disgusts me that i come here on thisfor advise and get criticised from people like yourself. look i am NOT justifying what i have done to find out, you dont know me to make a freaking comment like that. i'm not trying to 'rat' him out. do you not get that i need advise hence i come post this? and what a wickad person you are, tryna level up two VERY different sins and saying i'm as wurse than him, even though you dont know what he has done.
are you giving advise? lol. funny.
I am not judging you at all, I am giving you a taste of how your brother would feel subsequent to you going to your mother.
I think ample advise was given you to speak to your brother before ratting him out.. what do you call going to your mother about what he has done which you out of your own admittance acquired through unlawful means? discipline?

Going to your mother is going public with it a sin between one is bad enough, between two, is horrible, between three is public knowledge.

indeed, maybe I am horrible, maybe you are who knows? I do hope thatAllah swt would make your brother a better sibling to you than you are to him at the moment!

all the best
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Banu_Hashim
07-12-2009, 06:40 PM
Anonymous,

We're only trying to offer our opinions on the matter to try and help you. Of course I don't know the situation first hand. But have you spoken to your bro about this? Give him a chance to change his ways and maybe you as a family can come out better as a result.

Fe Amaanillah.
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anonymous
07-12-2009, 06:41 PM
i dont want to say, as theres memebers on this board that i have spoken to that know about the situation. my intention is not to expose him :( nor to be so vindictive and approach my mum, its not my kind of thing to do something like that. ^ bro its the best reply ive seen. jazakallah. how would i talk to him about it though when i cant even look at him. he is close to my mum hence why i think shel only be the one to have an affect on him. hell turn a blind eye towards me, or twist the story. i cant think of anyone who can advise him, we havent really got a father figure or someone older that would talk some sense into him. the only way hell turn back is probably out of guiilt or realising his mistakes, something that can only be done if someone speaks to him. i dont know what i can say. i cant bare to look at him. :(
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piXie
07-12-2009, 06:43 PM
:sl:

It is difficult to advise you on whether to tell your mother or speak to your brother or keep it quiet, as we do not know your situation and are fearful of making it worse...
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جوري
07-12-2009, 06:45 PM
Perhaps there is indeed another side of the story? How do you know that your version of the event is the true version of events?
you should tell him, I know something awful about you, and it hurts me, that my own sibling would commit such an egregious sin.. I thought I'd talk to you about it first before going to mother perhaps you can mend your ways and find your path back to Allah..
perhaps this would be the turning point in your relationship?
I don't think you telling anyone else would fix anything at all.. might actually ruin his relationship with your mother... what an awful thing that would be!
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anonymous
07-12-2009, 06:46 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Gossamer skye
I am not judging you at all, I am giving you a taste of how your brother would feel subsequent to you going to your mother.
I think ample advise was given you to speak to your brother before ratting him out.. what do you call going to your mother about what he has done which you out of your own admittance acquired through unlawful means? discipline?

Going to your mother is going public with it a sin between one is bad enough, between two, is horrible, between three is public knowledge.

indeed, maybe I am horrible, maybe you are who knows? I do hope thatAllah swt would make your brother a better sibling to you than you are to him at the moment!

all the best
hav i done it? have i told him? you know what, atm ive got a lot to think about and deal with. and i rather you just didnt bother posting. if saying that i am worse than my brother is not judging, what is exactly in your books? i really dont appreaciate some of your remarks, and the last thing i want right now is to get vex to a point where i do give people like you stories to make up how i am wurse than him blah blah through the language i use.. so lets leave it at that. i hope allah give you guideance and maybe a few manners aswell..
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anonymous
07-12-2009, 06:47 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Gossamer skye
Perhaps there is indeed another side of the story? How do you know that your version of the event is the true version of events?
you should tell him, I know something awful about you, and it hurts me, that my own sibling would commit such an egregious sin.. I thought I'd talk to you about it first before going to mother perhaps you can mend your ways and find your path back to Allah..
perhaps this would be the turning point in your relationship?
I don't think you telling anyone else would fix anything at all.. might actually ruin his relationship with your mother... what an awful thing that would be!
i saw it written with my own eyes. what other story can there be?
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anonymous
07-12-2009, 06:50 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by piXie
:sl:

It is difficult to advise you on whether to tell your mother or speak to your brother or keep it quiet, as we do not know your situation and are fearful of making it worse...
sis. i dont knwo what to do. and its proper broken me, cant imagine how my mum would be. i dont know where i can go. who i can turn to. cause eveyone will either judge me rather than help me get the advise i want. if i was so evil, i would of exposed him ages ago. its beating me up.
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جوري
07-12-2009, 06:50 PM
I didn't say you are worst than your brother, I said ratting him out wouldn't make you any better.. including your use of vulgar language like WTF .. it is a public forum, you are free to take it or leave it...

My remarks are a direct response of what you have posted here, if you want private time to think about it, then don't post it all together or ask a mod to close your thread--

all the best
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Banu_Hashim
07-12-2009, 06:52 PM
It sounds like a difficult situation. I would give it time. It is up to your judgement as to whether you think he is capable of seeking forgiveness and changing his ways. You can make du'a for him. Then, at a certain point you have to leave the rest of Allah (swt). May Allah make this situation easy for you, your brother and your family, inshaAllah.
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جوري
07-12-2009, 06:53 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by anonymous
i saw it written with my own eyes. what other story can there be?

There is always two or more sides to every story-- the more variables you add the more complex!

stealing? perhaps someone forced him to do it
fornicating- perhaps he was being raped
beating up- perhaps it is self defense
cheating- perhaps it was an eye twitch
lying- perhaps it was the truth
drugs- perhaps it was donuts powder
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anonymous
07-12-2009, 06:55 PM
also your use of 'WTF' doesn't make you any better.. I can see you are not much better than you allege your brother with such manners...
what do you call that? tbh, i dont even know why your personal attacks offend me so much, maybe because i just feel proper week, maybe its tha emtions. whu knows. buh i proper request you dont reply sister please. :) all tha best for you also
i NEED advise, that link doesnt wurk...?
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roohani.doctor
07-12-2009, 06:56 PM
Telling your mum isn't gonna solve anything. Your mum will probably get really angry and her attitude might affect her relationship with her son i.e. your brother. Your mum will never look at him the same away and that in the long run will affect everything (his actions etc). He looks up to your mum more than he does to you, so why ruin that relationship?

The best (and only) response would be to TRY to get over your 'hatred' and try to talk to him and let him know what he is doing is wrong. Its up to him if he wants to change his ways or not.

Like someone said, if his actions/sins are not affecting anyone but him, there is not much you can, or you should do at this point. You can pray for him.

Insha'allah may Allah guide him to the straight path. Ameen.
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جوري
07-12-2009, 06:58 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by anonymous
what do you call that? tbh, i dont even know why your personal attacks offend me so much, maybe because i just feel proper week, maybe its tha emtions. whu knows. buh i proper request you dont reply sister please. :) all tha best for you also
i NEED advise, that link doesnt wurk...?

indeed.. 'not much better' doesn't translate to worse?

I have said all I needed to anyway.. I hope you'll heed the collective advise given you here if mine is too sharp for your palate!

:w:
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glo
07-12-2009, 07:06 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Banu_Hashim
Agreed. Allah doesn't like the sins of Muslims to be exposed.
We have had this issue not so long ago.
I simply don't get this ... it is Islamically acceptable, even desirable, to hide/cover the sin of another Muslim? :?

What about the wrong that has been committed? The people who have potentially been hurt? The damage that has potentially been done?
(I am speaking in general terms, because of course I don't know what type of wrong the OP is talking about)

Would it be wrong to report a known Muslim criminal to the police? :?


(Forgive me, anon, I shouldn't take your quest for advice off topic. Perhaps I will start a thread in a better forum section.

I cannot give you Islamic advice, so please bear that in mind.
I think how you found out your information is not the important issue.
If i was you I would consider how serious the sin was your brother committed, whether anybody got hurt or any damage was done.
Is he repentant or will he do it again?
Can you find a gentle way to discuss this with your mother? Or would another member of your family be better?
Most importantly, have you spoken to your brother about this?

You are in a tough situation! I hope you find the best way forward. Pray for guidance and don't act rashly.)
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piXie
07-12-2009, 07:08 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by anonymous
sis. i dont knwo what to do. and its proper broken me, cant imagine how my mum would be. i dont know where i can go. who i can turn to. cause eveyone will either judge me rather than help me get the advise i want. if i was so evil, i would of exposed him ages ago. its beating me up.
Do you know of any sheikh or someone of knowledge whom you can call and consult them for advice?
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جوري
07-12-2009, 07:14 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by glo
We have had this issue not so long ago.
I simply don't get this ... it is Islamically acceptable, even desirable, to hide/cover the sin of another Muslim? :?

What about the wrong that has been committed? The people who have potentially been hurt? The damage that has potentially been done?
(I am speaking in general terms, because of course I don't know what type of wrong the OP is talking about)

Would it be wrong to report a known Muslim criminal to the police? :?


(Forgive me, anon, I shouldn't take your quest for advice off topic. Perhaps I will start a thread in a better forum section.

I cannot give you Islamic advice, so please bear that in mind.
I think how you found out your information is not the important issue.
If i was you I would consider how serious the sin was your brother committed, whether anybody got hurt or any damage was done.
Is he repentant or will he do it again?
Can you find a gentle way to discuss this with your mother? Or would another member of your family be better?
Most importantly, have you spoken to your brother about this?

You are in a tough situation! I hope you find the best way forward. Pray for guidance and don't act rashly.)

this isn't a police matter, it a matter between siblings. Also even in the west a judge decrees what evidence is permissible in court and what isn't -- taping someone for instance even if it implicates them in a crime first hand can be thrown out of court for the UNLAWFUL means in which it was obtained. Also in the U.S Everyone has the right NOT TO INCRIMINATE themselves. and to plead the fifth.
I hope you can put things of jurisprudence in perspective to that of a family affair, or indeed start a separate thread on the matter..
if your son stole from your wallet would you turn him over to the police? theft is indeed a police matter...
try to use your best judgment when it comes to questions of common sense..

all the best
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piXie
07-12-2009, 07:15 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by glo
We have had this issue not so long ago.
I simply don't get this ... it is Islamically acceptable, even desirable, to hide/cover the sin of another Muslim? :?
Glo, it depends on the situation. Even between siblings, it depends on the situation. That is why it is very difficult to say anything when we do not know the situation.
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anonymous
07-12-2009, 08:51 PM
Glo I really do appreciate your response esp as your not of my faith. and i do appreciate the majority of replies and advise. I think its something i have to sort out myself but jazakallah for all the help.:) i gues some things are better left quiet. :) and i guess if its guna be exposed it will in its own time :~)
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Banu_Hashim
07-12-2009, 09:18 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by glo
We have had this issue not so long ago.
I simply don't get this ... it is Islamically acceptable, even desirable, to hide/cover the sin of another Muslim? :?

What about the wrong that has been committed? The people who have potentially been hurt? The damage that has potentially been done?
(I am speaking in general terms, because of course I don't know what type of wrong the OP is talking about)

Would it be wrong to report a known Muslim criminal to the police? :?
As said, it depends on the situation. Generally, within a Muslim community if you come about somehow to know of a Muslim brother or sister doing something perhaps they should not be doing, drinking alcohol etc. then it is best not to make this sin public, and that includes back biting to others in private circles.
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glo
07-13-2009, 05:51 PM
Thank you for your clarifications with regards to my question on hiding/covering another Muslim's sin. (Thank you also to brother alcurad)

I guess I read Banu Hashim's statement that "Allah doesn't like the sins of Muslims to be exposed" and took it to it's most extreme meaning.
I feel reassured now.

Again, thank you. :)
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mathematician
07-13-2009, 06:45 PM
Ok let me spell it out for you. Using the words "wtf" is immature when
you are seeking advice on an islamic discussion forum. So get yourself some proper manners.
To be a good sibling you need to only say words that will increase your brother's self-esteem. You need to offer him advice or think of something that will make him a better person.
By the way, nobody here has told you this, but I will say it, why don't you concentrate on yourself? Are you that great of a person that you have that much free time focusing on what your brother is doing?
Wake up improve yourself and please stop uttering the wtf words, it's childish.
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anonymous
07-13-2009, 07:18 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by mathematician
Ok let me spell it out for you. Using the words "wtf" is immature when
you are seeking advice on an islamic discussion forum. So get yourself some proper manners.
To be a good sibling you need to only say words that will increase your brother's self-esteem. You need to offer him advice or think of something that will make him a better person.
By the way, nobody here has told you this, but I will say it, why don't you concentrate on yourself? Are you that great of a person that you have that much free time focusing on what your brother is doing?
Wake up improve yourself and please stop uttering the wtf words, it's childish.
With all due respect mathematician, if a brother comes on here seeking advice with regards to something his brother has done, it does not mean that he is not concentrating on himself and thinks himself a great person. Neither does it mean he has much free time wherein he is focusing on what his brother is doing. To a certain extent (and I am generally speaking here), an older sibling has a certain responsibility over their younger siblings. To be an example, watch over them, to help them stay on the correct path etc.

Anon292873
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anonymous
07-13-2009, 11:26 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by mathematician
Ok let me spell it out for you. Using the words "wtf" is immature when
you are seeking advice on an islamic discussion forum. So get yourself some proper manners.
To be a good sibling you need to only say words that will increase your brother's self-esteem. You need to offer him advice or think of something that will make him a better person.
By the way, nobody here has told you this, but I will say it, why don't you concentrate on yourself? Are you that great of a person that you have that much free time focusing on what your brother is doing?
Wake up improve yourself and please stop uttering the wtf words, it's childish.
Okay wiseman. Let me spell it out for you... When a human is angry, they say stuff which they most likely will tend to regret and in a state of anger they may come out with inappropriate terms like so.. Did i speak a bit patronisingly? POint proven much? you wouldnt like someone speaking to you like that so speak to me like that. One day on and I accept that wasnt appropriate for an Islamic forum. Instead of chuking personal abuse at people SEEKING advise, why dont you just fix up yourself and learn how to speak to people. Surley islam teaches patiencee and tolerance with people does it not?

Did I say I am that much of a rgeat person, what is wrong with you? Do you know the full story to be saying I have much too much time blah blah? No I think not, as I said, my story was complicated, I was trying to be honest by saying I didnt come accross it totally innocently, because I didnt. But again, people like you just like to jump tha bandwagon before learning to walk [thats thaquote right? :s Ha]
So just for the record Mathemetician, I am not trying to be vindictive by telling my mum, I was looking out for him & have been doing so for a VERY long time BUT he as crossed the limit. But people like you dont want to see it from others perspective...that'd probably be asking for too much, just read something and get on a hype about it...
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Ummu Sufyaan
07-14-2009, 05:23 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by anonymous
hav i done it? have i told him? you know what, atm ive got a lot to think about and deal with. and i rather you just didnt bother posting. if saying that i am worse than my brother is not judging, what is exactly in your books? i really dont appreaciate some of your remarks, and the last thing i want right now is to get vex to a point where i do give people like you stories to make up how i am wurse than him blah blah through the language i use.. so lets leave it at that. i hope allah give you guideance and maybe a few manners aswell..
^omg what is your problem with people...

well go on then, have a go at me as well!
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IslamicRevival
07-14-2009, 07:09 AM
If i was in your situation.... I'd want to talk to him first and find out the full story then take whatever steps necessary to stop him from doing whatever wrong he did. Should that not work and he continues to commit sin...Stand your ground, take a more hard-line approach and try your best to change him. Should you succeed...No need for anyone else to know but should he not listen...No option other then to inform your parents if you think they will stop him from commiting sin

Remember...We should conceal OUR own sins but to help someone else and try and save him or her is another matter. If that means we have to reveal their wrong doings to someone who can make them stop then so be it

All The Best
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anonymous
07-14-2009, 05:11 PM
Sister, It is not that he has a problem with people. The brother is distressed and worried. Please brothers and sisters, let us be tactful. Let us be a bit more gentler and understanding in our approach. may Allaah have mercy on us all.

JazakAllaahu Khayran,
Anon6448493 (not the original poster)
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GuestFellow
07-14-2009, 05:24 PM
You have to be very careful. We are currently unaware what your brother as done, so we do not know how to exactly how to help you.

I would talk to your brother in private. Whatever he has done wrong, tell him to ask for forgiveness and make sure he does not do it again. Tell him not to tell anyone else and keep it to himself. Someone might fabricate the sin he has committed.

I personally wouldn't tell this to your mom. Just try to settle this matter without creating long-term problems.

Whatever decision you make, assess the consequences that might occur and make sure your following the correct Islamic principles to reach your decision. Try to make decision that will benefit your younger brother.

Hope this helps.
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anonymous
07-14-2009, 09:05 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Umm ul-Shaheed
^omg what is your problem with people...

well go on then, have a go at me as well!
was that just meant to provoke me? have you read the other comments? you know what, its a mistake to post on this forum i swear.. all you get is abuse/people criticsing you/patronizing you/not even trying to be understanding regardless of the situation and then comments trying to procoke you to start an argument. great support eh?
i am no saint nor did i try to accross as it, i tried to be honest to get genuine advise and all i get is abuse tryint to make me look pathetic. but to the people that just tried to put me down, would you ever want to be spoken like that when you wwant help? when your not even in the proper mental state? i know when someone is annoyed they say stuff which they dont mean (referring to my use of language) but never have i come accross some of this stuff, proper hurts me to see some comments on here. i am trying to improve myself and one of the ways i wana do that is not to make tha right decisions hnce i needed the help..
jazakallah for all tha comments for GENUINE aadvise, may Allah bless you all keep you on tha straight path..
mod please just close this.
salaam
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GuestFellow
07-14-2009, 11:09 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by anonymous
was that just meant to provoke me? have you read the other comments? you know what, its a mistake to post on this forum i swear.. all you get is abuse/people criticsing you/patronizing you/not even trying to be understanding regardless of the situation and then comments trying to procoke you to start an argument. great support eh?
i am no saint nor did i try to accross as it, i tried to be honest to get genuine advise and all i get is abuse tryint to make me look pathetic. but to the people that just tried to put me down, would you ever want to be spoken like that when you wwant help? when your not even in the proper mental state? i know when someone is annoyed they say stuff which they dont mean (referring to my use of language) but never have i come accross some of this stuff, proper hurts me to see some comments on here. i am trying to improve myself and one of the ways i wana do that is not to make tha right decisions hnce i needed the help..
jazakallah for all tha comments for GENUINE aadvise, may Allah bless you all keep you on tha straight path..
mod please just close this.
salaam
Salaam.

We all can get a little annoyed at times and say things that we don't really mean. Don't worry; we all have been through that. Remember Islam teaches us self-control. I would put that first before your emotions; though expressing your emotions is fine as long as you’re cautious and careful not to other other people's feelings.

I am not specifically having a go at you. I am just making a general statement that is applicable to anyone.

Peace.
Reply

Aurora
07-14-2009, 11:49 PM
Speak to your brother about it and no one else, unless what your brother has done is harming other people (e.g. theft).
Reply

Yanal
07-14-2009, 11:54 PM
:sl:

You should clearly tell us what he did in order for us to give a good response to assist you in your dileema insha'Allah.

:w:
Reply

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