View Full Version : hijabi sister turned me down twice
AnonymousPoster
07-22-2009, 01:01 PM
I proposed to a hijabi muslim female 2 times, each was 6 months apart.
I did it through my family. Both times the sister said no.
The thing is, I am known to be a really religious guy in our community, so I was and still am a bit confused.
The question is, should I try proposing to her a 3rd time? What do you think?
I am sad about it. But then I don't know, I don't want to have to convince someone why marrying me would be the right thing.
Your thoughts are appreciated.
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AlbanianMuslim
07-22-2009, 02:46 PM
Selam
Dont propose again, she said no twice. It means she has a solid reason. It may or may not have anything to do with you. Dont be sad, Allah swt has someone out there for you. Dont let yourself wallow in the shadows now because this girl turned you down. Go looking elsewhere. You will find someone for you.
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Raaina
07-22-2009, 02:53 PM
I agree with AlbanianMuslim, I wouldn't ask her again. I'm sure you will find someone for you :)
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- IqRa -
07-22-2009, 02:54 PM
No means no?
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Nσσя'υℓ Jαииαн
07-22-2009, 03:17 PM
There's nothing for you to be sad about. She's obviously just not interested...and if she has said no twice, there's no need to ask a third time...and I would assume it would only annoy her more. I doubt it has anything to do with religiousity. She's not interested. Make plenty of du'a brother. InshaAllah you will find a good sister.
:sl:
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nebula
07-22-2009, 03:41 PM
bro if shes said no twice then i wouldn't try a 3rd time, dont be upset about it, Do dua to Allah to grant you a pious wife that will please you when you see her, you've got guts bro for trying twice! subhannallah, im scared of trying the first time! :hmm:
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Beardo
07-22-2009, 04:06 PM
I would thing when you offer once, that is enough. If she reconsiders, she can come back to you. No point in insisting upon it. And 6 months is too close together to propose again. Really, brother, the first time should have been more than enough. Just my two cents though. Probably not even worth that much.
But yeah. Insha'Allah there is someone better out there for you. There's a reason for everything.
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Clover
07-22-2009, 04:08 PM
I wouldn't do it again. If she has said no once, and then again, she probably just doesn't love you, or she has a good reason not to marry you.
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Ansariyah
07-22-2009, 04:59 PM
Bro dont feel disheartened i'm sure theres someone more suitable for u out there. Plenty fish in the sea?
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AntiKarateKid
07-22-2009, 05:05 PM
There are plenty more (hijabi) fish in the sea bro!
I remember one I thought was single. Turned out she was married when I asked LOL. :exhausted
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Ibn Abi Ahmed
07-22-2009, 05:09 PM
We seldom end up with the first people we propose to. Just gotta get up, take it in stride and move on.
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Intisar
07-22-2009, 05:17 PM
Honestly, just leave her alone, and make du'a. Allaah has something in store for you, just be patient.
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Banu_Hashim
07-22-2009, 05:21 PM
Bro,
It wasn't written for you. InshaAllah you'll find someone who
is interested in you :).
Oh, by the way has anyone ever been to these 'Marriage Events' ?
http://islamiccircles.org/marriage/index.htm
There's going to be one where I live in the Islamic Fayre. I got an email about it.
1) Marriage Event for Single Muslims in Bristol
at Islamic Cultural Fayre at Eastville Park
T
IME: 2:00PM TO 5:00PM
DATE: Sunday 9th August 2009
VENUE: Private Marquee within the Islamic Cultural Fayre
at Eastville Park, Fishponds Road/Muller Road, Bristol
There will be a Muslim Marriage event for single Muslims taking place at the Islamic Cultural Fayre on
August 9th in a separate private large marquee between
2pm and 5pm. The marquee will be located on the grounds of the fayre but away from the main event for privacy purposes.
This is an excellent opportunity for single Muslims to find a potential spouse in an halal environment.
Participants are requested to bring a mahram with them where possible.
The event will be run by Islamic Circles based in London who have a successful track record of running halal marriage events for the last 7 years.
This event open to all Muslims from all backgrounds, ages and statuses.
Parts of the profits from the event will go towards charity.
Prior registration is required which costs £15. This will cover costs of hiring marquee, equipment, refreshments etc for the marriage event.
Registration involves filling in a profile as well.
To BOOK or for more information please contact
Tel: 07504 336 911 / 07914 481 776.
Website:
www.muslimmarriageevents.org
BOOKING DEADLINE: SATURDAY 8TH AUGUST 2009
HOW WILL IT WORK?
- Prefilled profiles of brothers and sisters will be displayed for the purpose of viewings and meetings.
- Profiles do not have the name or contact details of participants on them.
- Those registering will be allocated an id Number.
- Participants will have this id Number on their profile and wear a label with this id Number on it to identify them.
- Brothers profiles will be displayed on the sisters side of the marquee and sisters profiles on the brothers side.
- The event will be segregated, i.e men and women on separate sides of the marquee.
- If you are interested in speaking to someone after viewing a profile one of our volunteers will approach the person you are interested in speaking to.
- After viewing a profile you will be allowed to speak to the person you are interested in for about 10/15mins.(If they agree.)
- Participants are not allowed to approach anyone they may be interested in themeselves. Contact must be made through a volunteer.
- ALL MEETINGS WILL BE DONE IN THE PRESENCE OF A MAHRAM OR A VOLUNTEER
- Viewing and meetings are to be arranged at the venue.
- No attendance means no display of profiles.
Only serious people are welcome to participate and not time wasters and people with bad manners.
Light refreshments will be available. Registration times stated and latecomers will be penalised.
An attempt will be made to ensure that there is a balanced gender ratio. Spaces will therefore be limited and admission will be on a first come first served basis.
Book online at:
www.muslimmarriageevents.org
For more information please contact:
Tel: 07504 336 911 / 07914 481 776
E-mail:
marriage@islamiccircles.org
Website:
www.muslimmarriageevents.org
Admin - Islamic Circles
PLEASE NOTE: This marriage event is being organised by Islamic Circles and not BMCS.
All queries should be directed to Islamic Circles on the above details and not BMCS.
Thoughts about it? Good idea?
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AnonymousPoster
07-22-2009, 05:39 PM
Assalamu Alayikum
It takes 2 to get married. And if she said no twice, then akhi you have to move on and find another inshaAllah. Make loads of dua.
Anon 268
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crayon
07-22-2009, 09:07 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Banu_Hashim
Oh, by the way has anyone ever been to these 'Marriage Events' ?
http://islamiccircles.org/marriage/index.htm
There's going to be one where I live in the Islamic Fayre. I got an email about it.
Thoughts about it? Good idea?
:><:
Hmmmm.. It's not for me, but hey, it may work for others.
As for the OP.
If she rejected you twice then she's not interested. Girls really are simpler than is commonly believed. You could be the most religious man in the world and it would not matter- if she didn't feel the chemistry then perhaps you're not the one for her.
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Alphadude
07-23-2009, 01:05 AM
there is no point in asking again leave her alone if a sister says no then its no if the sister says nothing then there is still a chance and btw deos she know you ?
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Ummu Sufyaan
07-23-2009, 02:25 AM
:sl:
being religious is only a portion of the equation when getting married, so perhaps she saw something else in you that didn't suit her.
maybe she has personal problems of her own that made her reject you, such as her being interested in someone else...or maybe she wanted to finish studying? i dont know, there could be hundreds of reasons...don't take it personally akhee, it happens all the time.
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Snowflake
07-23-2009, 11:00 PM
^true, although for some a 'religious' spouse is THE problem. But, Allahu alim why she rejected you bro. The only reason I can think of is, Allah has someone more worthy of you in store. So chin up. If you know you will make a good spouse but someone rejects you, hold your head up and tell yourself that its their loss - because it really is!
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