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Sizzlerjimer
07-22-2009, 01:37 PM
assalam u alikum wa rehamtualhi wa berkathu

i have a question for sisters.

Majority of sisters always say that there role models are the Female Companions SAHABIYAAT(MAY ALLAH BE PLEASED WITH THEM ALL).
My question to you is that as far as i know none of the sahabiyaats ever worked before marriage or after marriage so why do the sisters these days insist upon working after marriage instead of bringing up a islamic family?

Even practicing sisters say this and this sometimes leads to a husband and wife seeking separation. If the SAHABIYAATS are your role models shouldnt you follow your role models?

Jazak ALLAH Khayrun
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S_87
07-22-2009, 11:11 PM
hmm worked in what way obviosuly not in the way of today because the societies themselves were very different but...there were cases like:

Khadija radhiallahu anha was a business woman
Aisha radhiallahu anha was a teacher-many sahabahs were taught from her, she was a 'mufti'
Asma radhiallahu anha- she used to go to some land away from her home in what would today be a 'farmer'
there are stories of sahabiyats on the battlefield itself helping their men.

If a person wants to work or not work its between them and their families, but one question, if the women of your family were sick and had to expose their body parts to a doctor, would you prefer it to be a woman or man?
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Nσσя'υℓ Jαииαн
07-22-2009, 11:25 PM
Having a job or career isn't contrary to the sahabiyats...infact we need more women as teachers, doctors, physicians, scholars and other areas..

Khadija radhiallahu anha was a business woman
Aisha radhiallahu anha was a teacher-many sahabahs were taught from her, she was a 'mufti'
Asma radhiallahu anha- she used to go to some land away from her home in what would today be a 'farmer'
there are stories of sahabiyats on the battlefield itself helping their men.
Ditto.
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Clover
07-22-2009, 11:30 PM
Honestly, I know a lot of women (majority) can't be stay at home, cause their husbands don't make enough alone to pay for the household and the family. I don't see working moms better then stay-at-home moms, or vice-versa. They are just different.
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crayon
07-23-2009, 11:33 AM
I agree with what sister amani said.

Plus
" why do the sisters these days insist upon working after marriage instead of bringing up a islamic family?"

Why do you see to think it is an either/or kind of thing?

"Even practicing sisters say this and this sometimes leads to a husband and wife seeking separation."
There are dozens of other reasons why people get divorced. That may or may not be one of them. The only sure fire way to not get divorced is to never marry.
And maybe the reason 'practicing sisters' say it is because there is nothing wrong with it?
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Sizzlerjimer
07-23-2009, 04:48 PM
asalm u alikum wa rehmatulahi wa berkathu

AlhamdulilALLAH for all the answers

sister amani shukran for increasing my knowledge about the sahabiyaats (may ALLAH be pleased with them all)

as you rightly said that societies then were different from this day and age but Khadija RA never used to go on expeditions herself did she?can you confirm that the other sahabiyaats(may ALLAH be please with them all) did they do the work as you have mentioned before embracing islam or after.It obviously depends on the family but my point is that, and what i have seen is that women are putting their career before ANYTHING else.They are practicing muslims but still there career is the MAIN PIRORITY in there life, are they not contradicting themselves because in islam whatever your husband says goes(offcourse he cannot say unjust things he has to be fair) but when you think of it what is more important to you?

your kids growing up and one day you hear your teenage girl saying ''BUT I LOVE HIM'' or your kids growing up in the islamic way.

Will you like to have your son runaway from the house and live with a girl as friends and commit adultry, all because parents were busy in there CAREERS.i personally think bringing up kids is more of a responsibilty of the mother as she is always with them.Offcourse dad has a massive responsibilty as well but if he busy in earning the bread and butter then it leaves the responsibilty to the mum.
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AntiKarateKid
07-23-2009, 04:54 PM
Originally Posted by OxygenHacker
assalam u alikum wa rehamtualhi wa berkathu

i have a question for sisters.

Majority of sisters always say that there role models are the Female Companions SAHABIYAAT(MAY ALLAH BE PLEASED WITH THEM ALL).
My question to you is that as far as i know none of the sahabiyaats ever worked before marriage or after marriage so why do the sisters these days insist upon working after marriage instead of bringing up a islamic family?

Even practicing sisters say this and this sometimes leads to a husband and wife seeking separation. If the SAHABIYAATS are your role models shouldnt you follow your role models?

Jazak ALLAH Khayrun
But did the sahabiyaat's ever justify that with Islam? Conditions have changed since then and now women have more of an opportunity to work. They did however justify their care of their families with islam and that needs to be focused on.

As for marriage disruption, many many things can cause that too. The key is to strike a balance. I do agree though that some women these days are too worried with be able to work all day outside instead of taking care of the kids on the inside. Stuff like daycare simply isn't as good an option.

If my wife wanted to work, I'd not have a problem with that as long as the kids are being taken care of by us both PERSONALLY. Not by a babysitter or what have you. (I'd rather a stay at home wife but am cool with some part time job for her).
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Sizzlerjimer
07-23-2009, 05:02 PM
asalm u alikum wa rehmatulahi wa berkathu

AlhamdulilALLAH for all the answers

sister amani shukran for increasing my knowledge about the sahabiyaats (may ALLAH be pleased with them all)

as you rightly said that societies then were different from this day and age but Khadija RA never used to go on expeditions herself did she?can you confirm that the other sahabiyaats(may ALLAH be please with them all) did they do the work as you have mentioned before embracing islam or after.It obviously depends on the family but my point is that, and what i have seen is that women are putting their career before ANYTHING else.They are practicing muslims but still there career is the MAIN PIRORITY in there life, are they not contradicting themselves because in islam whatever your husband says goes(offcourse he cannot say unjust things he has to be fair) but when you think of it what is more important to you?

your kids growing up and one day you hear your teenage girl saying ''BUT I LOVE HIM'' or your kids growing up in the islamic way.

Will you like to have your son runaway from the house and live with a girl as friends and commit adultry, all because parents were busy in there CAREERS.i personally think bringing up kids is more of a responsibilty of the mother as she is always with them.Offcourse dad has a massive responsibilty as well but if he busy in earning the bread and butter then it leaves the responsibilty to the mum.

What is the most important thing in ones life after the deen, family???if the family aint tight then nothing is right - - - do you agree???

i donot want my wife(havent found her yetimsad)to work not because i want her to be my slave(ASTAGFIRULALLAH),what i donot want is that both of us are so busy that we are not fulfilling the duties towards eachother and trust me it happens a lot where both of them donot even have time to sit down and have dinner together i mean COME ON where is the islamic way of life in that??brother is working days sister is working nights wow awesome you might have money but HELLO will you have the islamic family.Will your kids grow up as being righteous and pios??I think brothers will agree with this.

Having a career should not be the focal point.

Sister clover your right that husbands just sit at home and do nothing then the sisters have to go out and work but these husbands should be embarssed.
These husbands are called benefit thiefs in UK thought i will put this in here.:hiding:


Jazak ALLAH for the lively debate.
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UmmSqueakster
07-23-2009, 05:12 PM
I always wonder - if women are not suppose to work, then who will muslim women go to for medical care? For education? For legal help? For any number of things?
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Sizzlerjimer
07-23-2009, 05:22 PM
asalam u alikum wa rehamtulahi wa berkathu

Your wondering about the right thing sister but i think your not getting my point here.
Its ok to work but when that work IS everything for you and your neglecting everything else then Woah you have problems and then that leads to not following the deen and that leads to manyyyyy problems.


Jazak ALLAH
Reply

Clover
07-23-2009, 05:56 PM
Originally Posted by OxygenHacker
asalm u alikum wa rehmatulahi wa berkathu

AlhamdulilALLAH for all the answers

sister amani shukran for increasing my knowledge about the sahabiyaats (may ALLAH be pleased with them all)

as you rightly said that societies then were different from this day and age but Khadija RA never used to go on expeditions herself did she?can you confirm that the other sahabiyaats(may ALLAH be please with them all) did they do the work as you have mentioned before embracing islam or after.It obviously depends on the family but my point is that, and what i have seen is that women are putting their career before ANYTHING else.They are practicing muslims but still there career is the MAIN PIRORITY in there life, are they not contradicting themselves because in islam whatever your husband says goes(offcourse he cannot say unjust things he has to be fair) but when you think of it what is more important to you?

your kids growing up and one day you hear your teenage girl saying ''BUT I LOVE HIM'' or your kids growing up in the islamic way.

Will you like to have your son runaway from the house and live with a girl as friends and commit adultry, all because parents were busy in there CAREERS.i personally think bringing up kids is more of a responsibilty of the mother as she is always with them.Offcourse dad has a massive responsibilty as well but if he busy in earning the bread and butter then it leaves the responsibilty to the mum.

What is the most important thing in ones life after the deen, family???if the family aint tight then nothing is right - - - do you agree???

i donot want my wife(havent found her yetimsad)to work not because i want her to be my slave(ASTAGFIRULALLAH),what i donot want is that both of us are so busy that we are not fulfilling the duties towards eachother and trust me it happens a lot where both of them donot even have time to sit down and have dinner together i mean COME ON where is the islamic way of life in that??brother is working days sister is working nights wow awesome you might have money but HELLO will you have the islamic family.Will your kids grow up as being righteous and pios??I think brothers will agree with this.

Having a career should not be the focal point.

Sister clover your right that husbands just sit at home and do nothing then the sisters have to go out and work but these husbands should be embarssed.
These husbands are called benefit thiefs in UK thought i will put this in here.:hiding:


Jazak ALLAH for the lively debate.
Dude, I never said that, and I'm a dude, and I'm not a "believer". I guess English is not your first language or something, cause I mean everything you just said was completely opposite lol.
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Nσσя'υℓ Jαииαн
07-23-2009, 06:45 PM
As long as they don't make working their most important priority, it shouldn't be a problem. But we do definitely need more women in different fields, where they are really necessary. You have to understand that there are people who can balance their work and personal life. It's not everyones cup of tea but it's possible. I personally wouldn't mind either way, as long as I'm not completely bound at home...
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S_87
07-23-2009, 09:18 PM
Originally Posted by OxygenHacker
asalm u alikum wa rehmatulahi wa berkathu

AlhamdulilALLAH for all the answers

sister amani shukran for increasing my knowledge about the sahabiyaats (may ALLAH be pleased with them all)

as you rightly said that societies then were different from this day and age but Khadija RA never used to go on expeditions herself did she?can you confirm that the other sahabiyaats(may ALLAH be please with them all) did they do the work as you have mentioned before embracing islam or after.It obviously depends on the family but my point is that, and what i have seen is that women are putting their career before ANYTHING else.They are practicing muslims but still there career is the MAIN PIRORITY in there life, are they not contradicting themselves because in islam whatever your husband says goes(offcourse he cannot say unjust things he has to be fair) but when you think of it what is more important to you?

your kids growing up and one day you hear your teenage girl saying ''BUT I LOVE HIM'' or your kids growing up in the islamic way.

Will you like to have your son runaway from the house and live with a girl as friends and commit adultry, all because parents were busy in there CAREERS.i personally think bringing up kids is more of a responsibilty of the mother as she is always with them.Offcourse dad has a massive responsibilty as well but if he busy in earning the bread and butter then it leaves the responsibilty to the mum.
wa alaikum salam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh

well brother there is a difference between having a career as part of ones life and dedicating ones whole life to their career and thereby neglecting other duties like family.

as for your question on before or after islam-the examples i gave, as you can see were after except in the case of khadija radhiallahu anha.

if you are complaining about women making their careers their main priority, then i wholeheartedly agree with you-this can be found in women AND men though and children also need a father for guidance. but to write off women totally ...:hmm:
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Sizzlerjimer
07-23-2009, 09:41 PM
asalam u alikum wa rehamtulahi wa berkathu

sister amani i agree with you that kids need the father as well but a father cannot be there 24/7 like the mother is and if the mother is eating sleeping drinking work then who is going to bring up the kids in an islamic way.i will always be there for my kids INSALLAH.

Howdy,as they say in tennesse or may be texas but they do say it anyways clover aka taoist no english is not my first language but if you read what YOU said it said something about non working husbands so i commented on it.

sister LOH(light of heaven) can i just call you LOH its easier pwetty plz :embarrass

balance yes if the balance can be achieved then its worth it but it is hard to get that balance.Serious you wont mind either way?The reason i ask is because many girls from the west say ''ME, MYSELF & I'' so reps to you. May ALLAH give you and all of us(who are not married) pios and righteous spouses and may ALLAH help us to have a good married life AMEEN.
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S_87
07-23-2009, 11:05 PM
Originally Posted by OxygenHacker
asalam u alikum wa rehamtulahi wa berkathu

sister amani i agree with you that kids need the father as well but a father cannot be there 24/7 like the mother is and if the mother is eating sleeping drinking work then who is going to bring up the kids in an islamic way.i will always be there for my kids INSALLAH.
in that case...i agree with you..
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