format_quote Originally Posted by
briren08
Hello everyone! I'm new here. I've been studying Islam for a little while now, and I STILL have questions I can't seem to find answers to and I'm hoping SOMEONE here will be able to help me.
1) I'm engaged to a non-muslim man. He is completely agnostic and respects the fact that I may want to convert and has no desire to stop me or to even stop our future children from practicing Islam. He has told me that religiously, I would make the decisions regarding our children. I know it is haram to marry a non-muslim because as supposed "head of household" his religion would take prescedence over mine, but in this case it isn't true.
2) We also own a dog which we've had for 2 years. Is there anywhere in the Qur'an that says dogs are haram? I've been told by a muslimah that only the saliva of a dog is haram and I know 2 muslimahs that have dogs. Please clarify!!
3) For the younger muslim's on this forum, how do you make time during school to pray? Also, how do you make time to pray during work? (I know "make time" sounds really bad, but I don't know how else to describe it, I apologize.)
4) My fiance and I have been living together for the past year, if/ when I convert, will we have to live seperately or sleep in seperate rooms? (I recently moved back to his hometown and rely on him completely for income and a house until I find my own job.)
Thank you in advance for your answers and insight.
format_quote Originally Posted by
briren08
Hello everyone! I'm new here. I've been studying Islam for a little while now, and I STILL have questions I can't seem to find answers to and I'm hoping SOMEONE here will be able to help me.
1) I'm engaged to a non-muslim man. He is completely agnostic and respects the fact that I may want to convert and has no desire to stop me or to even stop our future children from practicing Islam. He has told me that religiously, I would make the decisions regarding our children. I know it is haram to marry a non-muslim because as supposed "head of household" his religion would take prescedence over mine, but in this case it isn't true.
2) We also own a dog which we've had for 2 years. Is there anywhere in the Qur'an that says dogs are haram? I've been told by a muslimah that only the saliva of a dog is haram and I know 2 muslimahs that have dogs. Please clarify!!
3) For the younger muslim's on this forum, how do you make time during school to pray? Also, how do you make time to pray during work? (I know "make time" sounds really bad, but I don't know how else to describe it, I apologize.)
4) My fiance and I have been living together for the past year, if/ when I convert, will we have to live seperately or sleep in seperate rooms? (I recently moved back to his hometown and rely on him completely for income and a house until I find my own job.)
Thank you in advance for your answers and insight.
Hello my future sister in Islam, I hope you are in the best of health and i welcome you to this forum and for being so open about your issues.
I will try my utmost to answer these questions one by one.
1) Subhanallah Allah is guiding you towards the truth and the gift of imaan(Faith) is a gift that is so special that we can NEVER even begin to comprehend. Allah does not give this gift to everyone but only those that he has chosen. Just because a person is born a Muslim does not mean they will die one. Allah is wanting to guide you towards the truth because he sees something in you that he likes and your heart is that of the heart of a believer so Allah is wanting to guide you towards the truth and this is something that you will no doubt thank him for, for the rest of your life and it is something ALL Muslims should thank him for!
Life is full of sacrifices. Sacrifices are something none of use particularly want to do but is something that we have to do because of our change in situation. You never knew that you will be guided into Islam before you became interested in it but because you are being guided into Islam it is enevitable that you will have to make some of the greatest sacrifices! Many of the Prophet's and messengers from the past had to make the biggest sacrifgices as did Sahaba's aswell as people who have and still are reverting to Islam today.
In life we have to do things which are best for us even though they may be the hardest things to do but Allah knows best what is best for his creations and we have to make certain sacrifices in order to progress and do the right thing.
Believe me I have talked to, debated with and have had discussions with MANY non Muslims about religion and spirituality and the fact of the matter is that Allah has sealed the hearts of many people and ONLY he can unseal their hearts no matter how hard anyone tries. Even if you and the whole world were to try your whole life to try and convert someone but if Allah does not will it and unseal their hearts then they will remain sealed. So the fact of the matter is that if Allah does not unseal your fiancee's heart then you will never be able to stay with him and marry him. For it is forbidden for a Muslim women to marry a non Muslim man and such marrige is void in the eyes of Allah and that women would live a life like she was an adulteress in the eyes of Allah.The reason you stated that he would not be head of the household is not realistic at all and also is NOT a valid excuse to marry a non Muslim man in the eyes of Allah as the Qur'an and the sunnah states it is haraam(Forbidden) in ALL circumstances.
A prominant scholar of Islam Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid states:
It is forbidden for Muslim women to marry non-Muslim men, according to the Qur’aan, the Sunnah and the consensus of the scholars (ijmaa’). If such a marriage takes place, it is invalid, it does not have any impact upon inheritances according to sharee’ah, and any children born from this union are illegitimate. Hoping that the husband may become Muslim does not alter this ruling in the slightest.
If it is established that your fiancee will not revert to Islam then you must leave him immediatley because then it would be clear that Allah will not unseal his heart. Allah knows what is best for you and all of his creations and he will surely give you something much better. It is better for you and your children that you marry a pious and practicing Muslim man. You may not realise that now because this man is in your life and you always imagined a life with him but the reality is that we do not know what is best for us ONLY Allah does and this is a sacrifice you will have to make in order to live your life as a true Muslim aswell as your childrens lives because they will only ever grow up to be good Muslims if both their parents were Muslims not if one of their parents were not Muslims.
2)
The prominant Scholar of Islam Mufti Ebrahim Desai states according to the issue about keeping dogs:
All creatures are the creation of Allah Taãla and do deserve the recognition of being a creation of the Almighty. As much as Muslims detest even the sight of pigs - it is the creation of Allah Taãla - and because Allah has placed life into it, we cannot inflict pain nor torture the pig.
Similarly Allah Taãla created the dog from among His creation. This does not mean that we should love the dog. It is perhaps the indoctrination of the Western culture that 'The dog is Man's best Friend'. The theory that 'dogs are very dependent on Human affection' is a myth - again culture and custom has helped to develop this unnatural behavior.
Allah Taãla the Creator of this Universe - having created the dog would surely have known that the dog requires Human affection and love to exist in this world. Rasulullah (Sallallaaahu Álayhi Wasallam) would have advised us to keep dogs as pets. On the contrary, we are instructed not to keep dogs as pets and 'love' them as exemplified by the non-Muslims. Remember our life is structured and bound by the Shariah i.e. The Noble Qurãn and the beautiful example of Rasulullah (Sallallaaahu Álayhi Wasallam).
Consider these Ahaadith:
Sayyidna Abu Talha (Radhiyallaahu Ánhu) reports that Rasulullah (Sallallaaahu Álayhi Wasallam) said, "Angels do not enter a house wherein there is a dog or an animate picture.
(Sahih Bukhari Hadith no. 2986)
Sayyidna Ibn Abbas (Radhiyallaahu Ánhuma) reports from Sayyidna Maimoona (Radhiyallaahu Ánha) that once Rasulullah (Sallallaaahu Álayhi Wasallam) became sad; and said that Jibra'eel (Álayhis Salaam) promised to meet him at night but did not turn up. "By Allah what has kept him back," said the Prophet (Sallallaaahu Álayhi Wasallam). Then he realised a puppy was under his bed. He ordered that the puppy be removed and the area be sprinkled with water. In the afternoon when Jibra'eel (Álayhi Salaam) came, Rasulullah (Sallallaaahu Álayhi Wasallam) enquired as to the delay. Jibra'eel (Álayhi Salaam) said that we, the group of Angels do not enter a house wherein there is a dog or pictures.
(Sahih Muslim Hadith no.3928)
In the light of these Ahaadith and other narrations it is not permissible to keep dogs as pets. The household is deprived of the Mercy of Allah Taãla.
However, Jurists have stated that it is permissible to keep a dog for security purposes, farming and hunting.
The saliva of a dog is Najis (impure). If it touches the clothes or body, that portion also becomes impure and must be washed. And Allah Ta'ala Knows Best
Praise be to Allaah.
Islam gives permission to keep dogs for certain purposes, such as hunting, guarding livestock and protecting crops. An analogy has been made for similar purposes or those which are more essential, such as protecting houses from burglars, using them to find drugs and thieves. In any other cases, the one who keeps a dog is subject to the warning of having one or two qiraats deducted from his reward every day.
Shaykh Yoosuf ibn ‘Abd al-Haadi said, quoting from some of the scholars:
Undoubtedly the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) gave permission to keep hunting dogs in several ahaadeeth, and said that keeping a dog for hunting does not detract from one’s reward. In another hadeeth he gave permission to keep a dog for herding livestock, and in another hadeeth for keeping sheep, and in another hadeeth for guarding farms. So it is known that the reason which makes it permissible to keep a dog is when it is for a purpose, and the ruling depends on whether that reason is there or not. If the reason is there, then it is permissible to keep a dog, even though some reasons are more important than agricultural reasons, and some reasons are equally important to those that are mentioned in the texts. Undoubtedly crops come under the same ruling as farms, and cattle come under the same ruling as sheep; guarding chickens and geese – to keep foxes away from them – comes under the same heading as guarding sheep. Undoubtedly the fear of burglars and keeping a dog to warn of them and wake one up is a more important reason; the Lawgiver pays attention to interests and wards off harms; if there is no reason for it then it is wrong. End quote.
Al-Ighraab fi Ahkaam al-Kilaab (p. 106-107).
Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:
Based on that, a house that is in the middle of the city has no need for a dog to guard it, so keeping a dog for this purpose in such a case is haraam and it is not permissible, and it detracts one or two qiraats from the reward of its owners every day. They should get rid of this dog and not keep it. But if a house is in the countryside and there is no one else around, then it is permissible to keep a dog to guard the house and its occupants; guarding the members of the household is more important than guarding livestock and crops. End quote.
Majmoo’ Fataawa Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (4/246).
Secondly:
Islam does not enjoin anything but that which is good for people, and it does not forbid them anything but that which is harmful to them. But this wisdom is known to those who know it and it is unknown to those who do not know it. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) enjoined washing vessels that have been licked by a dog, and that is only because its saliva is impure. Modern science has proven that there are several harmful things in water from which a dog has drunk. The Muslim who follows the command of sharee’ah has no choice but to obey the command, and refrain from that which is forbidden, even if he does not know the reason behind it and there is nothing wrong with trying to find out the reason behind it, but he should not make his compliance dependent upon knowing the reason.
Some of these diseases are transmitted because of going against the command of Islam, and eating and drinking from vessels used by dogs, and some of them are transmitted because the dog carries germs that cause these diseases.
Whatever the case, the Muslim hears and obeys, and goodness is found in responding to sharee’ah by doing what is commanded and avoiding what is forbidden.
And Allaah knows best.
So it is established according to the Sunnah that it is forbidden to keep dogs except for Hunting, farming and protecting property. So if you were to keep the dogs then you have to keep them with the intention of them protecting your property and also they CANNOT live in the house because Angels do not enter the homes that have dogs in them so they have to be kept outside in a shed or something. Whenever contact is made then you should also make sure that the dogs salive does NOT touch any part of you otherwise you should wash the area 7 times as stated by our beloved Prophet (Saw).
3) I myself pray during school and work and I have found that there are a lot of people who make excuses why they can't pray at school or work and they usually go home and make up for the prayers there. It is usually down to laziness or just not being bothered to even try. But to be honest with you it is very easy to pray at school and work. Firstly one does not have to worry about Fajr and Isha because Fajr you do early at dawn and Isha when your at home at night. So the prayers in question are Zuhr, Asr and Maghrib. The Zuhr prayer one can do at lunch time because in every workplace and school you will have a lunch time whether its hafl an hour, 45 minutes or an hour. So you can easily do Zuhr then because I'm sure it won't take much of your lunch break. At work it is law to have an afternoon break so in winter Asr prayer can easily be done in your afternoon break. In the summer it is a bit later so can be done after work and school hours. Depending on the time of the year Maghrib is also usually after work and school hours but in Winter it may be during work and school hours. Regardless of whether Asr and Maghrib are in work and school hours or not, they can easily be prayed within 5 minutes. Now everyone goes for toilet breaks and toilet breaks usually last for a bit more than 5 minutes so the time a person takes to go to the toilet one can easily pray Asr and Maghrib.
This is a test for us because Allah wants to see how much effort his slaves are willing to put into worshipping the one who gave us the ability to go to school and work in the first place. If we put the effort in then one can easily pray at work. If there is no delegated prayer place then make one. All you need is a prayer mat or a clean sheet and put it in anywhere in the school or workplace apart from the toilet or a place where there is visible dirt and you can easily pray there without any problem. No organisation will ever refuse an employee or pupil the right to pray and if they do then you can easily take the matter further. I hope this helps.
4) This is a matter that should be discussed with a scholar of Islam. But may I add that anyone who is not our Mahram we CANNOT be alone with them or have any sort of physical contact with them at all. So yes you would certainly have to seperate from him and also not have any sort of physical contact or be alone with him. Again you should discuss this matter further with a scholar.
I hope I have helped and please do not delay accepting Islam because life is uncertain and Allah is wanting to guide you towards the truth and you should feel extremly lucky that he has chosen you out of so many. I hope sister that your issues get resolved but bare in mind sacrifices will have to be made and that whatever Allah wants for us is the best for us for he sustains us and we should ask of him.
Please don't hesitate to ask me anything you like and I will try my best to help.