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AnonymousPoster
08-21-2009, 10:09 AM
When one hardship after another befalls you, you can't eat anything... i mean you literally cannot swallow anything because it hurts, your body is so numb with the pain and heartache, mentally exhaustion. You can't sleep at night, you have nightmares about what is happening in your life, you wake up shaking and trembling, only to be hit by the reality of the situation, meaning it wasn't just a nightmare, but it's really happening in your life and you can't go back to sleep.

You stay awake crying, making duas to get better, but crying so hard like there is no way out of this, no way out of this tight corner that you've been pushed in and can't get out, you are overwhelmed with worry, grief and anxiety?

When morning comes, your eyes open, you are hit with the reality again, the reality that life has turned into a complete misery. You don’t want to get out of bed because you are numb with depression and anxiety and thinking what is the point. You try and pray, you cry to Allah telling Him how you feel. Then, time to go to work/college/uni….. seeing people smiling, laughing, hugging loved ones, and you feel overwhelming pain in your heart, that stabbing pain of being so lonely, no one to talk to no one to turn to.

Sitting at work, sitting through lectures etc… you are like a zombie, just sitting there not being able to hear what is being said, not really aware of what is going on around you, you just stare straight ahead with empty eyes, you want to cry but you can’t people are around you and you feel numb, life has come to an end but you are still somehow moving around, just floating around in this world, waiting for actual death but having no peace in your heart, no peace whatsoever, not even for a second.

You go home, the day being a blur, you try and eat, but it hurts, it hurts to eat because you haven’t eaten in so long, then even when you manage a bite, you want to throw up. Then, you start crying, crying so much your body hurts. Not being able to tell anyone what is wrong because they will tell you the usual, “get over it, things will get better”…. “snap out of it!”……”things happen for a reason”……” you will find happiness”….

Bla bla bla but you and they really don’t know what the future holds and you know they’re only saying to help in some way but it’s still not making you feel better, nothing is making you feel better, you don’t even know what you want them to tell you, you don’t even know what you want to hear.
You know you’ve been through this before, yet its worse everytime is comes back, its worse and you lose the will and thepower to live your life as normal. You are just a zombie in this lonely world. No one can hear you, no one can feel your pain and no one sees the tears you cry in your heart.

Have you been through this on several occasions, not just once and still not know how to deal with it, just completely lost and confused even after praying, reciting Qur’an etc?
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markislam
08-21-2009, 12:06 PM
if you can tell us what issues you are going through then we might be able to answer, may be we have gone through the same before.
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cat eyes
08-21-2009, 01:21 PM
Originally Posted by AnonymousGender
When one hardship after another befalls you, you can't eat anything... i mean you literally cannot swallow anything because it hurts, your body is so numb with the pain and heartache, mentally exhaustion. You can't sleep at night, you have nightmares about what is happening in your life, you wake up shaking and trembling, only to be hit by the reality of the situation, meaning it wasn't just a nightmare, but it's really happening in your life and you can't go back to sleep.

You stay awake crying, making duas to get better, but crying so hard like there is no way out of this, no way out of this tight corner that you've been pushed in and can't get out, you are overwhelmed with worry, grief and anxiety?

When morning comes, your eyes open, you are hit with the reality again, the reality that life has turned into a complete misery. You don’t want to get out of bed because you are numb with depression and anxiety and thinking what is the point. You try and pray, you cry to Allah telling Him how you feel. Then, time to go to work/college/uni….. seeing people smiling, laughing, hugging loved ones, and you feel overwhelming pain in your heart, that stabbing pain of being so lonely, no one to talk to no one to turn to.

Sitting at work, sitting through lectures etc… you are like a zombie, just sitting there not being able to hear what is being said, not really aware of what is going on around you, you just stare straight ahead with empty eyes, you want to cry but you can’t people are around you and you feel numb, life has come to an end but you are still somehow moving around, just floating around in this world, waiting for actual death but having no peace in your heart, no peace whatsoever, not even for a second.

You go home, the day being a blur, you try and eat, but it hurts, it hurts to eat because you haven’t eaten in so long, then even when you manage a bite, you want to throw up. Then, you start crying, crying so much your body hurts. Not being able to tell anyone what is wrong because they will tell you the usual, “get over it, things will get better”…. “snap out of it!”……”things happen for a reason”……” you will find happiness”….

Bla bla bla but you and they really don’t know what the future holds and you know they’re only saying to help in some way but it’s still not making you feel better, nothing is making you feel better, you don’t even know what you want them to tell you, you don’t even know what you want to hear.
You know you’ve been through this before, yet its worse everytime is comes back, its worse and you lose the will and thepower to live your life as normal. You are just a zombie in this lonely world. No one can hear you, no one can feel your pain and no one sees the tears you cry in your heart.

Have you been through this on several occasions, not just once and still not know how to deal with it, just completely lost and confused even after praying, reciting Qur’an etc?
who are you in love with?:statisfie
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AnonymousPoster
08-21-2009, 01:23 PM
Originally Posted by markislam
if you can tell us what issues you are going through then we might be able to answer, may be we have gone through the same before.
I can't its really long and painful for me to start writing abut that sorry. imsad :cry:
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AnonymousPoster
08-21-2009, 01:24 PM
Originally Posted by cat eyes
who are you in love with?:statisfie
I take it you've been through it because of love, am I right?
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markislam
08-21-2009, 01:42 PM
i was wondering the same only love has this symptoms :)
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AnonymousPoster
08-21-2009, 02:31 PM
Originally Posted by markislam
i was wondering the same only love has this symptoms :)
Your right, especially when they don't love you in return. imsad :cry:
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markislam
08-21-2009, 02:35 PM
oh that means one way love :)

let me tell you one way love never works.

to make a clap you need both hands you can cant clap with one hand :)

my suggestion leave her i know it is hard because your brain is controled by that love bug, but believe me it will take time to heal, change your way of thinking and after a few months you will be fine. avoid seeing the girl / boy as much as you can.

i believe you are a guy :)

Insha Allah everything will be fine.
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cat eyes
08-21-2009, 02:46 PM
Originally Posted by AnonymousGender
Your right, especially when they don't love you in return. imsad :cry:
how do you know the person dose not love you in return? have you tried talking with the person?
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AnonymousPoster
08-21-2009, 03:15 PM
Originally Posted by cat eyes
how do you know the person dose not love you in return? have you tried talking with the person?
Yes, they tell me they love someone else, and that they are letting me go because they don't want me to hurt the other person. Unbearable this is. Words will never explain the pain. :cry:
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AnonymousPoster
08-21-2009, 03:17 PM
Originally Posted by markislam
oh that means one way love :)

let me tell you one way love never works.

to make a clap you need both hands you can cant clap with one hand :)

my suggestion leave her i know it is hard because your brain is controled by that love bug, but believe me it will take time to heal, change your way of thinking and after a few months you will be fine. avoid seeing the girl / boy as much as you can.

i believe you are a guy :)

Insha Allah everything will be fine.
Can Allah swt not change hearts if we pray with a full heart? I believe so.
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cat eyes
08-21-2009, 03:46 PM
Originally Posted by AnonymousGender
Yes, they tell me they love someone else, and that they are letting me go because they don't want me to hurt the other person. Unbearable this is. Words will never explain the pain. :cry:
i am sure your tired of hearing this but be patient

go out now and enjoy with friends, take your mind of things..remember Allah and your obligations to him. remember Allah gives things and takes away things for a reason so you will go back to him and be more obedient to him in future.. you know my brother/sis i don't know this person you fell in love with, i don't know how you got caught in this trap but Allah will find a way out. trust on him. its takes time an this is obviously one of shaytaans traps u got caught in. the evil one made your hopes high
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AnonymousPoster
08-21-2009, 03:58 PM
Originally Posted by cat eyes
i am sure your tired of hearing this but be patient

go out now and enjoy with friends, take your mind of things..remember Allah and your obligations to him. remember Allah gives things and takes away things for a reason so you will go back to him and be more obedient to him in future.. you know my brother/sis i don't know this person you fell in love with, i don't know how you got caught in this trap but Allah will find a way out. trust on him. its takes time an this is obviously one of shaytaans traps u got caught in. the evil one made your hopes high
Thank you for your advice sister. I think I will need anti-depressants, I can't cope or function properly.
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Snowflake
08-21-2009, 04:03 PM
Originally Posted by AnonymousGender
Can Allah swt not change hearts if we pray with a full heart? I believe so.
:(

Yes, Allah can change the hearts and it hurts to lose the person you love. But do you not want the person you love to be happy with the one he loves? :?
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Ummu Sufyaan
08-22-2009, 02:45 AM
:sl:
Originally Posted by cat eyes
who are you in love with?:statisfie
my thoughts exactly.

@ thread starter, yes i've experienced what you went through (for a different reason), only not so intense so to speak, and i can tell you there is no other way around it expect for patience *extremely important*

just whatever comes your way go with the flow, and don't give up because i will guarantee if you do you'll be a lot worse off, you'll feel a whole lot more frustrated and annoyed than you do now and it'll be like taking 1 step forward and 2 steps backwards <---not helpful at all.

i cant tell you things will get better, becuase i don't know if they will, but i do know that if you try your best to be patient and try to accept things, your heart will be at more peace. make the intention to move on otherwise you'll be holding unto false hopes which wont help your situation and will make you feel even more depressed. stay away from that person so that your feelings towards them are at least "neutralized," think of their bad habits and think that maybe this person if you ended up with them led you astray, so maybe Allah has prevented you from doing something stupid.

get out and do things. take up new hobbies, change your life style a little and try to keep yourself as distracted as possible.

if you have committed sins becuase of this love, repent to Allah.
just accept Qadr and remember that whatever Allah gives and takes belongs to Him.

and also: http://www.islamicboard.com/family-s...ve-object.html
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Afg
08-22-2009, 02:53 AM
Take your time, InshaAllah it will heal things.
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Salahudeen
08-22-2009, 04:51 AM
say: no calamity shall befall us except for what Allah has ordained, he is our protector and in him let the believers put their trust. [al-Tawbah 9:51]
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