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View Full Version : Obstacles and how did you overcome them?



AnonymousPoster
09-01-2009, 06:54 PM
:sl:

Have you ever realised that you want to change before it's too late and you want to go further in your deen, but you can't cause there's been things in the way, may it be family that's stopping you, maybe the people who you hang out with are having negative influances on you, have anyone ever been in situations like that and if so how have you overcome them.??

Im in a sticky situation where after saying I want to do 'Alima', my mother tells me that I won't be able to handle it, and if I would have asked when i was younger she would have let me do it.:mmokay:

How do I convince my mum and dad, that I CAN handle it. and if i leave it any later in going to get too old, then it'll be straigh outta the question for them then, cause then they'll tell me im too old...:ermm:

:wa:
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- IqRa -
09-02-2009, 08:28 AM
Just tell her that is what you want to do, that it is your desire to do that.
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AnonymousPoster
09-02-2009, 12:19 PM
^ Tried, tested.....and failed..imsad
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- IqRa -
09-02-2009, 12:30 PM
More force?
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AnonymousPoster
09-02-2009, 12:41 PM
The thing is my parents are like it's education or alima. You can't do both because you can't handle it, and one of them is gunna suffer. And my mum has this constant fear that im gunna end up dropping my education (Which I obviously won't.) Im trying to tell her that Im gunna have to make some sacrifices, then it just end's up turning into a fight, where we both have COMPLETLY different views on everything...

Cause I haven't exactly been brought up to be really islamic, it's kinda a shock to their system, but plently of my cusins have done it and they've got through it without having to drop their education...


I feel like im in a never ending loop with it now..:blind:
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Ramadhan
09-02-2009, 01:28 PM
You have to be patient and always in a state to ask Allah for help.

I was living in not exactly an Islamic way, but Alhamdulillah this year Allah provided me with His hidayah, and I have been in intensive study of Islam and Quran and modified my ways of living radically.
Alhamdulillah my family are all very supportive, but not most of my friends whom I hang out with and normally spend my free time with.
They all think I have become a "radical" and have been quite hostile to me whenever I "show" my Islamic ways of life or when I try to do dakwah to them.
It makes me very sad and quite depressed actually.
But I try to bear it out and keep asking Allah to ease the way for me.
So my suggestion to you is to try to pray as often as possible, make duas as often as possible, and do not alienate other people especially your own family. Communicate with them as freqent as possible. Insya Allah it will be easier for you
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Ramadhan
09-02-2009, 01:38 PM
You have to be patient and always in a state to ask Allah for help.

I was living in not exactly an Islamic way, but Alhamdulillah this year Allah provided me with His hidayah, and I have been in intensive study of Islam and Quran and modified my ways of living radically.
Alhamdulillah my family are all very supportive, but not most of my friends whom I hang out with and normally spend my free time with.
They all think I have become a "radical" and have been quite hostile to me whenever I "show" my Islamic ways of life or when I try to do dakwah to them.
It makes me very sad and quite depressed actually.
But I try to bear it out and keep asking Allah to ease the way for me.
So my suggestion to you is to try to pray as often as possible, make duas as often as possible, and do not alienate other people especially your own family. Communicate with them as freqent as possible. Insya Allah it will be easier for you
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Muslima.F
09-02-2009, 09:17 PM
I really understand your situation,

im in a sticky situation right now that to me is so pathetic but i cant stop thinking about it.
I wanted to come into Islam more and embrace it whole heartedly but all of a sudden I dont know why but I keep thinking of this celebrity that had recently passed away. I became interested in his life and I knew I should not really be doing this. But every time I try to stop thinking about it, it pops up into my mind at random times and I find myself day dreaming.
I felt ashamed that I became interested in a celebrity who is very very famous.So i then thought i should be interested in the greatest man the holy prophet Muhammad (s.a.w). But when i try the celebrity keeps coming back.
I would really appreciate some useful tips.
jazakallah.
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AnonymousPoster
09-02-2009, 09:24 PM
^If I were you Id begin with small steps. Like pray all your salaah on time with full concentration, Pray more Quraan, Increase you nafil salaah, especailly in this blessed month. Make lots of dua that Allah keeps your heart firm, and steadifast. and over time you will notice a change, you've gotta give yourself time to adjust, as you said you become interested in a celeb who passed away recently....I pray that Allah guides you and makes you heart full of his rememberance.
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AnonymousPoster
09-02-2009, 09:28 PM
My parents have said no for now, but I completly respect their decision. In the long-term they are only thinking of my well-being. Please make dua that Allah keeps me steadifast and gives me patience, and gives me something better. JazakAllah
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AnonymousPoster
09-02-2009, 10:26 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Muslima.F
I really understand your situation,

im in a sticky situation right now that to me is so pathetic but i cant stop thinking about it.
I wanted to come into Islam more and embrace it whole heartedly but all of a sudden I dont know why but I keep thinking of this celebrity that had recently passed away. I became interested in his life and I knew I should not really be doing this. But every time I try to stop thinking about it, it pops up into my mind at random times and I find myself day dreaming.
I felt ashamed that I became interested in a celebrity who is very very famous.So i then thought i should be interested in the greatest man the holy prophet Muhammad (s.a.w). But when i try the celebrity keeps coming back.
I would really appreciate some useful tips.
jazakallah.
:salamext:


Think about all the bad things this celebrity probably did, then think about how good Prophet Muhammad was [in private and public], and how he was way more handsome [the best of creation], and how he was good to his wives, and how he achieved way more than a celebrity, and how he was more of a man etc.
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vlamrko
09-03-2009, 01:51 AM
i understand your dilemma very well too. its good that you were able to find a comfortable place in it all though. it is hard to respect all your parents' decisions when you have your own personal hang ups about them, and then you wind up just feeling guilty for arguing or disagreeing or feeling bitterly about the whole thing. my father for example would not help me to pay for my university tuition unless i studied at least two subjects of his choosing, and this sort of give-and-take method was put into everything for my family. in the end, after trying to complete everything they asked me to and finding still it was not the best for me, i just wound up doing everything alone and i have always felt guilty about abandoning their wishes, even if made me unhappy to fulfill them all the time.
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Ibn-Shakoor
09-03-2009, 01:59 AM
:sl:
That was the same response I got from my parents but with the opposite reply. In grade 6(3 years ago) I asked my parents to allow me to attend an Madrasaah near me for a few years to comple hafidh. They were completely shocked that I asked that(I wasn't a good practising Muslim at that age) but I persuaded them to let me attend my Madrasaah full time for one year then part time the other few years. Alhumdulilah,all I did was pray to Allaah and be patient. That is what you have to do. Allaah will not answer your dua if you require a speedy response,so be patient:).

PS:I'm 13 and a full Hafidh,alhumdulilah.:wa:
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AnonymousPoster
09-03-2009, 10:10 AM
^Masha'Allah that's great. Such a young age. I think to be pateint is my only choice at the moment, but it dosn't help knowing it's something you really want to do, and someone's telling you, you can't do it. I wasn't whole heartedly practicing about a year a ago, and now I am i feel like im missing out on gaining some knowledge..

it is hard to respect all your parents' decisions when you have your own personal hang ups about them, and then you wind up just feeling guilty for arguing or disagreeing or feeling bitterly about the whole thing.
^Exactly.

i just wound up doing everything alone and i have always felt guilty about abandoning their wishes
^Im sorry to hear that, It's a really common problem amongst children nowadays and parents, becuase they always have different wishes, and now I feel im giving into their wishes but abandoning mine whilst doing so..
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