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View Full Version : Paranoia about wether i'm backbiting



AnonymousPoster
09-14-2009, 10:57 PM
Recently i've become more aware about making sure i'm not backbiting/gossiping, but it's making me abit OTT. Sometimes i'm telling someone something that someon said and i instantly think it's wrong and i shouldn't be telling them, when actually i'm just telling them something so we can organise a meal etc and i'm saying that this person said we should do this, but i don't think it's a good idea etc.

Or i'll be telling someone something that that person needs to know and it's just a normal life thing, but then i get paranoid again. Basically i'm OTT about it that i'm almost going to stop telling people anything that someone else said, even if it's something normal and harmless.

I know this sounds really silly, but i don't think i've explained properly.
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Salahudeen
09-15-2009, 01:47 AM
I get you and I admire this quality you have and would swap with you any day of the weak to have it. It's better to be cautious then to regret it.

"Whoever believes in Allah and the last day should say something good or remain quiet"

from reading your post I get a picture in my head of you implementing the above hadith :) you have a very good thing,
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cat eyes
09-15-2009, 03:02 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by AnonymousGender
Recently i've become more aware about making sure i'm not backbiting/gossiping, but it's making me abit OTT. Sometimes i'm telling someone something that someon said and i instantly think it's wrong and i shouldn't be telling them, when actually i'm just telling them something so we can organise a meal etc and i'm saying that this person said we should do this, but i don't think it's a good idea etc.

Or i'll be telling someone something that that person needs to know and it's just a normal life thing, but then i get paranoid again. Basically i'm OTT about it that i'm almost going to stop telling people anything that someone else said, even if it's something normal and harmless.

I know this sounds really silly, but i don't think i've explained properly.
its not ott. this is a healthy feeling that you have. if you fear this much it means you have very strong iman, its better to feel it then not feel anything at all! some people just ramble on without thinking about the other persons feelings there intelligence comes across as arrogance and they can't help themselves to show the other one down.. so don't worry to much yeah:)
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AnonymousPoster
09-15-2009, 02:00 PM
Oh please don't admire me, this is a recent thing learnt from life lessons and bad experiences. I guess acting like this is a million times better than acting at the other end of things though.
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Snowflake
09-15-2009, 08:03 PM
^Aw may Allah bless you. Ameen. It's good to worry about such these things but only as much as they should be worried about. If we go OTT we'll simply stop talking to people.

Well, if you are certain what you say will offend the peson you are talking about then that's when you know you should stop. But if you know it wouldn't, yaani, you are speaking in the same manner as if they were present and you know they wouldn't dislike anything about it, then it's ok. But as Squiggles said, if you're not sure then avoid. :)
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