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View Full Version : Who are you closer to, or would you be closer to (if unmarried)?



Beardo
09-15-2009, 12:04 AM
Just out of curiousity!
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IbnAbdulHakim
09-15-2009, 12:09 AM
lol bro its impossible to be closer to anyone more then your intimate partner

because... well... you get intimate :uuh:
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Güven
09-15-2009, 12:12 AM
wife ofcourse :hmm:
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Intisar
09-15-2009, 12:23 AM
I can go days w/o talking to my sibs. But I cannot go a day w/o talking to my husband. So the answer is obvious.
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Cabdullahi
09-15-2009, 12:35 AM
i could spend a day without both of them the nagging wife and the annoying siblings

are you daft!!!! im joking about the former i'll be very close to her inshallah
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Ibn Abi Ahmed
09-15-2009, 12:41 AM
:sl:

The spouse is described in the Qur'an as 'clothing' for a reason..no one can be as close as her.
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Beardo
09-15-2009, 12:44 AM
Well, that solves the problem. My bro got married months ago, and it seems like he's still newly married. I've gone days without talking to him, and it doesn't bother either of us. I thought maybe this is because we're not close or something. Guess I was wrong! It's just the natural love I suppose.

Ah well. Wish I had more than one sibling at times.
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IbnAbdulHakim
09-15-2009, 01:02 AM
^ heh ! :p

wen my bro got married he still played something with me pretty much everyday. he just distributes his time

when he plays with me - my sisters play with my sister in law
and wen i play wiv others - he plays with his wife


it all works out :D
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Beardo
09-15-2009, 01:06 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by Fighting4Iman
^ heh ! :p

wen my bro got married he still played something with me pretty much everyday. he just distributes his time

when he plays with me - my sisters play with my sister in law
and wen i play wiv others - he plays with his wife


it all works out :D
Hmm... Well, lucky you got more siblings, Masha'Allah.

For me, it's different. Whenever he has time leftover, he somewhat comes to my room for a few minutes. Basically when he's out to uni, we talk on the phone maximum once a week. Sometimes when he goes we don't talk at all for weeks straight. And when he's home with us and his wife, we probably get a few minutes together a few times throughout the day.

It's a bit different once your only sibling gets married.
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Salahudeen
09-15-2009, 01:53 AM
whatever you do, don't get jealous of her, I know of many situations like this and the sister gets jealous that she's no longer the brothers centre of attention and begins disliking his wife and picking faults with her and causing problems. It's happening in my family, certain people are saying she's done black magic on him cos he doesn't care anymore at all about his blood siblings. It's all about his wife according to him, she got him wrapped round the fum.
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Amanda
09-17-2009, 09:40 AM
My husband, of course! He is my partner, my confidente, my best friend... there is no one I would trust more than him.

And, unfortunately, my brother and I don't get along very well... he doesn't seem to approve of many of my life choices. :(
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ژاله
09-17-2009, 04:34 PM
why arent parents included in the poll? >_>
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Humbler_359
09-17-2009, 05:01 PM
:sl:

I know a very close between Husband and Wife. However, we have to think of other people's feeling, not only us in so much romantic, dinner, time alone, etc. As we know, husband and wife is 24/7. Yes, we do.

I wouldn't ignore other member of family (brothers, sisters), I had a wonderful brothers, I had a great times playing with them, chatting, gaming, no complaining, etc since we were raised from the same parents.

For parents, I love them, I would definitely be there for them and give support. Why? Because our real relationship with them in 30 or 40 years longer than someone you married recently. I wouldn't like to see them getting old, imsad, make sure you don't miss valuable times as well as brothers/sisters.

I defintely respect wife as wife respect husband. I would definitely gave support her family-in-law.
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S_87
09-17-2009, 05:59 PM
husband of course.

i dont like the trend of how men and women married seem to be together fine but have this 'negativeness' against each other within their families. like the sisters may know all about the husbands/wifes short comings. not good
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alcurad
09-17-2009, 06:16 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Fighting4Iman
^ heh ! :p

wen my bro got married he still played something with me pretty much everyday. he just distributes his time

when he plays with me - my sisters play with my sister in law
and wen i play wiv others - he plays with his wife


it all works out :D
wut?

but it's ok ehafiz, your bro is all grown up now :_)
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GuestFellow
09-17-2009, 10:04 PM
I would be closer to my wife I think.

My brother and sister are annoying. >_>
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Tony
09-17-2009, 10:08 PM
My sons are closer to me than the breath that keeps me alive
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Rasema
09-17-2009, 10:39 PM
:sl:
I'm the closest to NOBODY:D
I love silence.I can't wait for my family to go somewhere and finally I'm alone!!!

I used to be close to my friend but not anymore. I guess, you don't have nothing to share with anybody. There is iman which is a way of your life but everyone runs away from you. OMG, i think its ib forum...what a loser am I :haha:

We're talking about people only?

:wa:
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The Ruler
09-17-2009, 10:40 PM
My reflection. Forever and always.
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Cabdullahi
09-17-2009, 11:50 PM
how close will you be to your reflection from the mirror, like Queen Grimhilde forever and always?

or where you referring to rasema's post
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Rasema
09-18-2009, 02:15 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by Abdullahii
how close will you be to your reflection from the mirror, like Queen Grimhilde forever and always?

or where you referring to rasema's post
No, I don't think she was rererring to my post. While I was editing it, due to typos, I added more stuff. May Allah,subHana wa ta'ala, unite us.

Umer r.a. prayed fajer and recited Surah Yususf,and when he reached the verse"I expose my distress and anguish only onto Allah," he raised his voice in crying

"Abdullah ibn ash-Schikhir relates:"I saw the Messenger of Allah praying and his chest was'buzzzing',like the buzzing of a cooking pot,due to crying."
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جوري
09-18-2009, 02:20 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by Abdullahii
i could spend a day without both of them the nagging wife and the annoying siblings
rofl.. I was tickled by that...


on a separate note: how can anyone choose, it is like saying you are lost at sea and can save only one person, who would it be your mom or your spouse?..

I think I'd just sit there and die with them.. I mean how can you choose?
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Rasema
09-18-2009, 02:25 AM
:sl:
Emotions are emotions. In a few minutes they disappear then we regret and feel guilty of the way we felt. Just like our mood change.
:wa:
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Beardo
09-18-2009, 05:59 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by Gossamer skye
rofl.. I was tickled by that...


on a separate note: how can anyone choose, it is like saying you are lost at sea and can save only one person, who would it be your mom or your spouse?..

I think I'd just sit there and die with them.. I mean how can you choose?
That's definitely a tough position. As much as I'd like to use that opinion as well, I don't think it's the right way to go.
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MMohammed
09-18-2009, 06:06 AM
Ofcourse Islam has said wife
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جوري
09-18-2009, 06:29 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by Rashad
That's definitely a tough position. As much as I'd like to use that opinion as well, I don't think it's the right way to go.
Why not? I thought about it alot actually, as it was one of those dumb questions they posed us in philosophy class.
and so I figured, I get tired after exactly ten to fifteen mins max with a massive rush of adrenaline before my whole body shakes and I get cramps under water. In other words, I can't be that far off shore even to save just one. So the options are.
1- assess whether I can make two trips back and forth
2- ask the stronger of them to float on her/his back until I make another trip by myself or with help
3- make one trip and assess quickly if someone on shore can help me or if I can go back for another swim for the other party.

given that being that close to shore is unlikely in such a case in all likelihood I'd risk not just killing one but two people if I attempt to swim in any direction, also the other person has got to be completely trusting in other words when you tell them to float while you keep with one hand their head above the water while swimming with the other hand, there can't be sudden moves so you both don't end up drowning, in such a case to stay all there try to keep them both afloat and wait for help would be far better than choosing a party, even if it means you die together..

the problem with these questions, is that they are so far detached from real life situation that in order for you to properly assess what you'll do there has to be some realistic aspect to it..

probably if you really thought about it, you'd draw the same conclusion.
but who knows?

:p

:w:
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Muhaba
09-18-2009, 06:45 AM
Obviously one would be closer to spouse & eventually children because you live with them. You tend to become distanced from parents/sibs at least somewhat after marriage. Your focus is then on your own family.
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al Iskander
09-18-2009, 07:21 AM
In the Name of Allah .
:sl:

Ask to choose between mother and wife is a stupid question because we are not yet in this case and we don't know how the situation will become ( if it will become ) .

Argue about it is speculation and Islam is not founded on speculation but on real case . Allah is The One who is doing the situation and if it happens a such case , you should see how you will act .

So now I reply at the question , with whom am I closer ?

With my wife . I was muslim since 6 years when I met my wife and I completed my dihn with her . She changed my life , we shared feeling across and a lot of things of the life that it is not possible with others .

After that , of course , it is evident we must do the efforts to close to Allah .:statisfie

But this is not the same story .:D

:sl:
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The Ruler
09-18-2009, 02:00 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Abdullahii
how close will you be to your reflection from the mirror
Physically or emotionally? On both levels, pretty close.

or where you referring to rasema's post
No, I don't unnecessarily pick on people.
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Bub
09-18-2009, 02:10 PM
im not married but im closer to my mother than my bros! mother deserve gold, sliver and bronzer! masha'Allah
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Snowflake
09-18-2009, 02:38 PM
Like sis Rasema, I'm happiest on my own. Solitude brings out the best in me. I'm single, but people, whatever their relationship to me is, are just like flowers whose scent I will enjoy for a little while but then I need to be alone. I feel only Allah understands me and I don't have to justify myself to Him because He knows what I do and why I do it. He is the bestest friend anyone can ever ask for. He is my best friend and all I need.
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Cabdullahi
09-18-2009, 02:47 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by The Ruler
Physically or emotionally? On both levels, pretty close.



No, I don't unnecessarily pick on people.
that sounds like queen grimhilde to me but once the prince comes it'll be more like snow white...im positive

Being alone is good it means you can get more things done but a human being needs a partner and the closeness felt with that partner supersedes the closeness felt with siblings

Life started that way with adam and eve.....
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The Ruler
09-18-2009, 02:51 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Abdullahii
that sounds like queen grimhilde to me but once the prince comes it'll be more like snow white...im positive
No. She thought she was pretty. Prettier than Snow White. Gay.

Being alone is good it means you can get more things done but a human being needs a partner and the closeness felt with that partner supersedes the closeness felt with siblings
Not always.
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Cabdullahi
09-18-2009, 02:58 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by The Ruler
No. She thought she was pretty. Prettier than Snow White. Gay.



Not alwats.
yes not always because sometimes a breather is needed

and the envious queen grimhilde was her actual mother even more gay.
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The Ruler
09-18-2009, 03:08 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Abdullahii
and the envious queen grimhilde was her actual mother even more gay.
And so we agree. But the queen was her step-mother, not the real one. I think that makes it a little less gay, but gay nonetheless.
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mingzayni88
09-19-2009, 12:22 PM
I'm close to my siblings and even closer to my cousins (my cousins are around my age and my siblings are much older or much younger),

but I am by nature a loner and an introvert, which really worries me for when the time comes for me to marry, I don't know if I can communicat with my husband properly.imsad
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al Iskander
09-19-2009, 03:50 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by mingzayni88
I'm close to my siblings and even closer to my cousins (my cousins are around my age and my siblings are much older or much younger),

but I am by nature a loner and an introvert, which really worries me for when the time comes for me to marry, I don't know if I can communicat with my husband properly.imsad
:sl:

Marriage is the beggining of a new life and the mentality changes with time .

Don't despair , Allah has the capacity to gives you a good life with a good husband .

:sl:
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mingzayni88
09-19-2009, 03:58 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by al Iskander
:sl:

Marriage is the beggining of a new life and the mentality changes with time .

Don't despair , Allah has the capacity to gives you a good life with a good husband .

:sl:
:sl:

Jazakallah Khair, akhi!:statisfie
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Aisha20
09-19-2009, 04:05 PM
Husband of course
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Najm
09-19-2009, 09:09 PM
AsSalamOAlaikum WaRehmatuAllah WaBarkatuhu

I was always closest to my sister until she got married. She cant spend too much time with me course the hubby gets jealous and eavedrops!

I havent got anybody close now. At least it gives me a lot more time to reflect and do more ibaadah so i can get closer to Allah :statisfie

FiAmaaniAllah
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Ummu Sufyaan
09-22-2009, 04:39 AM
:sl:
in some ways i can see myself being closer to my siblings and in other ways, i can see myself being closer to my husband. i personally don't understand this concept some people have where they get married and seem to think that their families don't exist or don't matter anymore. it can be hurtful to the family/siblings, not to mention the married person comes off as arrogant as well. as someone mentioned above, its about distributing your time.
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al Iskander
09-22-2009, 03:43 PM
:sl:

I would like to add something to my precedent post .

Indeed I'm clooser my wife , I realize that my children grow and I have more discussion with them , specialy my elder daughter ( and the other too ) .

In fact , the family in Islam is very important and each member has its place .

:sl:
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ieshia
09-25-2009, 07:37 PM
Well i'm very young right now and could wait around 9-12 years before i think about getting married when i'll be like 27-30 or so. Right now my first priority besides myself are my brothers. I love them more than life it self, because they love and care for me without any obligations. I know i will always feel the same if not more love for my two brothers but of course i wouldn't spend as much time with them as i will with the man i get married to.
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ieshia
09-25-2009, 07:39 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by squiggle
...
Do you have a sister name sana/neelam?
I tried to send private message but i don't have that privilege yet.
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