60 Ways to Keep the Love of your Wife

[Al Ansari]

:sl:

1. Make her feel secure and sakinah - don’t threaten her with divorce

2. Give sincere salaams

3. Treat her gently - like a fragile vessel

4. Advise in private, at the best time, in the best way and atmosphere

5. Be generous with her

6. Warm the seat for her, you will warm her heart

7. Avoid anger, keep wudu at all times

8. Look good and smell great for your wife

9. Don’t be rigid or harsh-hearted or you will be broken

10. Be a good listener

11. Yes for flattery, No for arguing

12. Call your wife with the best names, cute nicknames, names she loves to hear

13. Utilize pleasant surprises

14. Preserve and guard the tongue

15. Expect, accept, and overlook her shortcomings

16. Give sincere compliments

17. Encourage her to keep good relations with her family

18. Speak about topics that interest her

19. Express to her relatives, how wonderful she is

20. Give each other gifts

21. Get rid of routine, surprise her



22. Have a good opinion of each other

23. Have good manners, overlook small things, don’t nitpick

24. Add a drop of patience, increase drops during pregnancy, menses

25. Expect and respect her jealously

26. Be humble

27. Sacrifice your happiness for hers

28. Help at home and with housework

29. Help her love your relatives, but don’t try to force her

30. Let her know that she is the ideal wife for you

31. Remember your wife in dua

32. Leave the past for Allah subhanahu wa ta ala, don’t dwell on, dig into, or bring it up.

33. Don’t act as if you are doing her a favor by working or providing, Allah is the Provider, the
husband is the carrier of the sustenance to the family

34. Take shaytaan as your enemy, not your wife

35. Put food in your wife’s mouth

36. Treat your wife like she is the most precious pearl that you want to protect

37. Show her your smile

38. Don’t ignore the small things, deal with them before they become big

39. Avoid being harsh-hearted

40. Respect and show that you appreciate her thinking

41. Help her to find and build her inner strengths and skills

42. Respect that she might not be in mood for intimacy, stay within halal boundaries

43. Help her take care of the children

44. Give her gifts with your tongue, be an artist with your compliments

45. Sit down and eat meals together

46. Let her know that you will be traveling or returning from travel, give her sufficient notice

47. Don’t leave home in anger

48. Maintain the secrecy and privacy of the home

49. Encourage each other in ibaadat

50. Respect and fulfill her rights upon you

51. Live with her in kindness, goodness, fairness in good and bad times

52. Kiss your wife, foreplay, “Don’t jump on her like a bull”

53. Keep disputes between the two of you, don’t take it outside

54. Show care for her health and well-being

55. Remember you are not always right or perfect yourself

56. Share your happiness and sadness with her

57. Have mercy for her weaknesses

58. Be a firm support for her to lean on

59. Accept her as is, she is a package deal

60. Have a good intention for her

[Salahudeen]

tankh you :)

[Cabdullahi]

even if the 60 were done efficiently alongside another 60 different ways to make her happy it wouldn't be enough

''6. Warm the seat for her, you will warm her heart''
i think this is the easiest i couldnt believe my eyes when i saw this

[S_87]

:sl:

jazakAllah khair

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[Salahudeen]

^ yes that's what the prophet peace be upon him used to do, whenever ayesha would walk into the room he would get up and say "take my chair" and also when she would drink out of a cup, he would put his mouth on the exact same spot she put her mouth and drink from the same spot.

You can also add to the list "never critize her cooking, even if you think it's the worst food ever made, just say

"I've never tasted food that tastes this good before"

it's like a trick that works on all women LOL I've tried and tested it and their faces light up ;D

[Cabdullahi]

warm the sofa for her as in sitting with legs as wide a part as possible whilst playing pes getting a complementary three course meal at 4 intervals of the day

[kashmirshazad]

Yeah, and just lying there , dont do any housework because we have to warm the sofa!
At least I have an excuse now. Thanks OP.

[Cabdullahi]

threatening someone is something which no sane human should do

1. Make her feel secure and sakinah - don’t threaten her with divorce

instead of falling for the trap of threatening her you could up her game whenever there's a drop in concentration and complacency is creeping in by saying sara,hasna and batoota will join us as of tomorrow that will make you a strong unit of 4 ,consider them your helpers and you can be the forewoman if you want but i might change because sara is pretty steadfast in everything ''

this works gentleman use it for motivational purposes and expect improvements in all departments

[Caller الداعي]

nice 1 bro may Allah give husbands to act upon these

[S_87]

threatening someone is something which no sane human should do

1. Make her feel secure and sakinah - don’t threaten her with divorce

instead of falling for the trap of threatening her you could up her game whenever there's a drop in concentration and complacency is creeping in by saying sara,hasna and batoota will join us as of tomorrow that will make you a strong unit of 4 ,consider them your helpers and you can be the forewoman if you want but i might change because sara is pretty steadfast in everything ''

this works gentleman use it for motivational purposes and expect improvements in all departments

so instead of the divorce threat another woman threat is that what youre saying? hahaha try that and tell us how it works

[Snowflake]

threatening someone is something which no sane human should do

1. Make her feel secure and sakinah - don’t threaten her with divorce

instead of falling for the trap of threatening her you could up her game whenever there's a drop in concentration and complacency is creeping in by saying sara,hasna and batoota will join us as of tomorrow that will make you a strong unit of 4 ,consider them your helpers and you can be the forewoman if you want but i might change because sara is pretty steadfast in everything ''

this works gentleman use it for motivational purposes and expect improvements in all departments

LOL! ;D


Nice post, mashaAllah@O.P.

[cat eyes]

i don't believe anymore a human can satisfy a spouse with all of these things. :(if it was to be the case then marriage would be easy and no one would be having problems. they would have to be a angel i mean....ahh well it makes you strive harder for jannah

[Salahudeen]

^ I think you could, maybe implement each thing a day at a time, like on the first day you could make sure that you make her feel secure and sakinah and don’t threaten her with divorce and you could make that the target of the day and then the next day you could focus on Giving sincere salaams because you spent a whole day ensuring that these things take place they'll stay with you through out your married life and by the end you'll be implementing all of the list :p

that's my theory, I'll try it when I'm married and let you know if it works lol

[Caller الداعي]

ur gonna have a challenging 60 days lol

[Salahudeen]

^ LOL but at the end brother, I'll be :shade: she'll be telling all her friends how good I am or how bad I am :shade: lol

[ژاله]

who will be good enough to act upon these 60 ways? :hmm:
they sound impractical to me! O_o one cant dedicate ones life to the happiness of ones spouse. there are other things in life too!

[Najm]

who will be good enough to act upon these 60 ways? :hmm:
they sound impractical to me! O_o one cant dedicate ones life to the happiness of ones spouse. there are other things in life too!

AsSalamOAlaikum WaRehmatuAllah WaBarkatuhu

I will!! inshaAllah, i will try my best to do all 60 infact i would do everything i can to make the wife happy. Also i need a more in-depth explaination for some of them....

Just make dua for me!

FiAmaaniAllah

[ژاله]

^lol thats impressive! lucky JJ!!...:D:D:D
may Allah make this 'mission impossible' possible for you. Ameen.
you tell which one you didnt get and the marriage gurus on the forum will explain them to you inshaAllah.
Good luck with your marriage~

[S_87]

AsSalamOAlaikum WaRehmatuAllah WaBarkatuhu

. Also i need a more in-depth explaination for some of them....

Just make dua for me!

FiAmaaniAllah

which ones

[Cabdullahi]

explanation needed for :
59. Accept her as is, she is a package deal
28. Help at home and with housework
18. Speak about topics that interest her
10. Be a good listener

[S_87]

explanation needed for :
59. Accept her as is, she is a package deal
28. Help at home and with housework
18. Speak about topics that interest her
10. Be a good listener

lol are you serious?
ok how i see it

59. no woman (or man) is perfect. you may find something you dont like in her but you may also find loads you do like in her. Accept what you dont like and dont hold onto it or bear grudges.

28. you really dont understand this? of course each household is different and just like a woman who doesnt really work should be considerate of her husband coming home from working, a man should also consider this. if a woman has worked all day and comes home tired just like the man-theres the kids cleaning and cooking still to be done. he should understand that just as hes probably tired, so is she and help with it all.

18. talk to her.

10. a wife needs to know her husband is there to listen to her whenever she wants to talk. he should be the type that listens rather than brushes her off and lets her 'deal with her stuff' alone. or just in general. talk.

[Cabdullahi]

i hope the above helps brother najm because i had already known the answers ,exactly the same solutions as the sister
ehm

[al Iskander]

:sl:

JazakAllahou bikhayr .

May Allah gives you the best rewrd for that , these are very good advices to share a nice life together , I and my wife .:statisfie

:sl:

[IbnAbdulHakim]

some of these shock me honestly :uuh:

34. Take shaytaan as your enemy, not your wife

52. Kiss your wife, foreplay, “Don’t jump on her like a bull”

heh......

most of them are natural easy stuff anyway

most brothers i know would check every box including my own ones :) ALHAMDULILLAAAAH!!

[GuestFellow]

52. Kiss your wife, foreplay, “Don’t jump on her like a bull”

:skeleton:

explanation needed for :
59. Accept her as is, she is a package deal
28. Help at home and with housework
18. Speak about topics that interest her
10. Be a good listener

59: Well everyone has something that other people may not like and that they cannot change...for example having a very big nose. You can't change that and it is best to accept it...okay maybe not the best example.

28. Help her clean up and do the washing etc.

18. Well when your talking to your wife, talk about that things that she likes and not the things that she would find boring.

10. When she is speaking don't interrupt her.

[Ayesha_Hanif]

mashallah, a good read :D

[Najm]

:sl:

1. Make her feel secure and sakinah - don’t threaten her with divorce

11. Yes for flattery, No for arguing

13. Utilize pleasant surprises

16. Give sincere compliments

19. Express to her relatives, how wonderful she is

21. Get rid of routine, surprise her

25. Expect and respect her jealously

29. Help her love your relatives, but don’t try to force her

30. Let her know that she is the ideal wife for you

AsSalamOAlaikum WaRehmatuAllah WaBarkatuhu

From 1-30 these are the ones i want to know about.

My Question for 1,11,13,16,19, 21,29: Suggest How i should do each of these? examples would be great (to get me started etc etc):embarrass

25: How does/can this occur, how to prevent it and deal with it? :hmm:

30. Let her know that she is the ideal wife for you

She already is!! Alhamdulillah!!:statisfie

FiAmaaniAllah

[S_87]

1. Make her feel secure and sakinah - don’t threaten her with divorce
When youre arguing or something- there shouldnt be the threat of im gonna divorce you if you dont... i wish i never married you etc

11. Yes for flattery, No for arguing
flattery :statisfie you look so beautiful, wow that suits you, mashaAllah this food was great youre such a good cook..compliments

13. Utilize pleasant surprises
bunch of roses, box of chocolates, a cute note stuck on the fridge/in her purse etc doesnt have to be expensive, small and thoughtful

16. Give sincere compliments
refer to no 11

19. Express to her relatives, how wonderful she is
mashaAllah im really blessed to have married your daughter, shes a great woman/wife etc

21. Get rid of routine, surprise her
you could take her out out of routine for dinner/a weekend away/just shopping or somewhere she wanted to go, plan it without telling her

25. Expect and respect her jealously
just how you would be jealous of other men over her she will be jealous of other women over you. no harm in letting her know you only have eyes for her

29. Help her love your relatives, but don’t try to force her
if you force her to look after and be with your family 24/7 then shes probably gonna be argh. dont make her stay and be with them all the time..having just married you, she will be getting used to you, to have to get used to a whole new family with her husband pressuring her sucks. it will take time and give her her own space and inshaAllah she will build a relationship with them

30. Let her know that she is the ideal wife for you
something like no 25...

[Salahudeen]

^ MASHALLAH sis the note on the fridge or in her purse is sooooo cute, she could be sitting on the train or bus and looking in her bag feeling miserable and then find this lovely note that makes her smile :) :cry:

you could put chocolates in her bag when she's not looking also :)

I know, I would enjoy finding ways to make her happy like above hehe part of the fun :statisfie

[Cabdullahi]

1. Make her feel secure and sakinah - don?t threaten her with divorce
When youre arguing or something- there shouldnt be the threat of im gonna divorce you if you dont... i wish i never married you etc

11. Yes for flattery, No for arguing
flattery :statisfie you look so beautiful, wow that suits you, mashaAllah this food was great youre such a good cook..compliments

13. Utilize pleasant surprises
bunch of roses, box of chocolates, a cute note stuck on the fridge/in her purse etc doesnt have to be expensive, small and thoughtful

16. Give sincere compliments
refer to no 11

19. Express to her relatives, how wonderful she is
mashaAllah im really blessed to have married your daughter, shes a great woman/wife etc

21. Get rid of routine, surprise her
you could take her out out of routine for dinner/a weekend away/just shopping or somewhere she .........

its obvious this person knows their stuff well and has a clear idea what they want.....oxford style detailed explanations

[Ansariyah]

19. Express to her relatives, how wonderful she is

Shouldnt they already know!? lool

[Najm]

:sl:

32. Leave the past for Allah subhanahu wa ta ala, don’t dwell on, dig into, or bring it up.

35. Put food in your wife’s mouth

38. Don’t ignore the small things, deal with them before they become big

40. Respect and show that you appreciate her thinking

42. Respect that she might not be in mood for intimacy, stay within halal boundaries

44. Give her gifts with your tongue, be an artist with your compliments

46. Let her know that you will be traveling or returning from travel, give her sufficient notice

49. Encourage each other in ibaadat

AsSalamOAlaikum WaRehmatuAllah WaBarkatuhu

JazakiAllah Khar for some of the explantions... Heres some more from 30 to 49 :embarrass

32. What if the past effects the future and continues to be an issue

35. What if the brothers/sisters watching or even mum and dad:embarrass

38. How should you deal with small things, and when is the best time to solve isssues and deal with things?

40. what if her thinking is not the best, and she continues to insist

42. why not? and how can you change that?

44. Examples to get me started

46 why? does it make a difference?

49. What if she doesnt like being told:hmm:

JazakAllah Khair in advance

FiAmaaniAllah

[Cabdullahi]

46. Let her know that you will be traveling or returning from travel, give her sufficient notice

i will call her and say i'll be back home in an hour from work enough time for her to cook but in actuality i'll be hiding near the house door then i'll barge in after 5 minutes saying ''where is my food thats it you failed im calling the takeaways ?''

[GuestFellow]

35. Feed her when your alone... ._.

[Beblessed]

Winning the Heart of your Wife

By Ibraahim Ibn Saaleh al-Mahmud. Happiness is a feeling that resides in the heart. It is characterized by peace of mind, tranquility, a sense of well-being, and a relaxed disposition. It comes as a result of proper behavior, both inward and outward, and is inspired by strong faith. This is attested to by the Qur’ân and Sunnah. Happy marriages are fundamental to a stable family and for personal well being. This book is specifically written for men so that inshallah they can have succesful marriages

PDF DOWNLOAD


Winning the Heart of your Husband

By Ibraahim ibn Saaleh al-Mahmud. Happiness is a feeling that resides in the heart. It is characterized by peace of mind, tranquility, a sense of well-being, and a relaxed disposition. It comes as a result of proper behavior, both inward and outward, and is inspired by strong faith. This is attested to by the Qur’ân and Sunnah. Allah says: Happy marriages are fundamental to a stable family and for personal well being. This book is specifically written for women so that inshallah they can have succesful marriages


PDF DOWNLOAD


THESE TWO BOOKS ARE GREAT BOOKS OF ADVICE!
I RECOMEND YOU TO READ IT BEFORE GETTIN MARRIED & ALSO IT'S NOT TOO LATE FOR THOSE WHO ARE MARRIED.

[sameur]

what is the Arabic meaning for the meaning Sameur. sorry for being off topic but it is urgent.

[Santoku]

I might add a 61st, DON'T CHANGE YOUR RELIGION WITHOUT TELLING HER!

[S_87]

32. What if the past effects the future and continues to be an issue

then you both have some major issues.
other than that if something comes up like a disagreement the worst thing to do is the whole 'remember when you' that will just start a whole other disagreement..sometimes youll be right sometimes youll be wrong.(and sometimes you might both know when the other persons right but at the same time be too stubborn to say it) would you prefer the wife bringing up when youre wrong-'remember this' etc? it doesnt help matters.

35. What if the brothers/sisters watching or even mum and dad:embarrass

when youre alone :D

38. How should you deal with small things, and when is the best time to solve isssues and deal with things?

hm it depends on what the small things are- with this one id say let some small things go because you are both your own person and there will be stuff that she may not like but not such a big thing to make a deal about. however if its something that reallllllllllllly grates you/her then let her know in a nice way- not when youre both arguing and you bring it up. for example if i dunno, ummmmmm she left the toothpaste cap open (lol :omg:) and its a pet peeve of yours then tell her in a nice way. you hear of marriages breaking up when these small things become such a big issue in the end..'he even does this and that', when in reality its nothing, just so built up.

40. what if her thinking is not the best, and she continues to insist

well shes not your clone, if you have a difference of opinion that is not islamic then you have to let her have her own mind and thinking. you dont want a wife that thinks different to you but hides from you because you dont allow her to express her true self :)

[QUOTE]42. why not?and how can you change that?QUOTE]
aah i cant explain that :hiding:

44. Examples to get me started

basically flirt with her.

46 why? does it make a difference?

yes it does. this doesnt mean everyday if youre working and she knows you will return at 5 you phone and say i am now coming home at 5. In the time of Muhammed :arabic5: when the men would go on journeys they would send someone to let their wives know they were almost home so the wives could 'prepare' for them. so if youre away for a couple of day+s and your wife is waiting for you to come back theres no harm in letting her know youll be home soon so she knows when to expect you. and the same goes for when youre going away. dont just tell her 30 mins before that youll be away for the week. unless emergency or something

49. What if she doesnt like being told:hmm:

it doesnt say tell her. it says encourage and it works both ways. for example if shes memorising the Quran then you dont say have you learnt this yet?:raging: rather you ask in a nice way and offer to listen to her and push her when she cant and memorise with her etc. and in the same way she can push you in a way that is supportive and encouraging but not demanding.

[S_87]

46. Let her know that you will be traveling or returning from travel, give her sufficient notice

i will call her and say i'll be back home in an hour from work enough time for her to cook but in actuality i'll be hiding near the house door then i'll barge in after 5 minutes saying ''where is my food thats it you failed im calling the takeaways ?''

hahahaaaaaaaaaa unless you want a super pissed off wife then dont try that :omg:

[Ummu Sufyaan]

:wasalamex

AsSalamOAlaikum WaRehmatuAllah WaBarkatuhu

JazakiAllah Khar for some of the explantions... Heres some more from 30 to 49

32. What if the past effects the future and continues to be an issue

you need to sort that out BEFORE you are married so that each of you know on which bases, etc you are going ahead with the marriage. anything you know about one anothers past needs to be rectified asap, as to not cause any trouble and misunderstanding's in the future.

38. How should you deal with small things, and when is the best time to solve isssues and deal with things?

ever heard the saying "a stitch in time saves nine?" the exact same concept applies here. don't let little argumentments get out of hand. if you do argue and it gets a little :raging: let the both of you calm down (take a walk or something?) and when you have both calmed down speak about whats bothering you and try to sort it out so that inshallah it doesn't become an issue again in the future.

40. what if her thinking is not the best, and she continues to insist

advice her in regards to what she is doing wring. you dont have do this directly, it could just be "you know i think it would be better we went on saturday, as the mall on Sunday's tends to be too crowded" or something like that. also put your your views across in a kind and polite manner as to make let "feel dumb."

44. Examples to get me started

"MashaAllah, this is dish is so delicious, i could eat the plate" :embarrass "you smell/look as beautiful as a rose" "mashallah the house looks so tidy, may allah grant you the best maid to clean your palace in jannah" when she gives a glass of water say "may allah grant you a sip from al-Kawthar" or something along those lines....
and say other such duas in front of her with a nice smile. this will make her know that she is doing something pleasing and and right, as well as make her feel encouraged , which in turn will make her enthusiastic to do more.

49. What if she doesnt like being told

then you simply shouldn't. as long as she is fulfilling the obligations, eg praying, etc then leave it at that as sometimes if dawah is done in the wrong time/manner/place, it may be counter-productive.

[Cabdullahi]

some of these harvard detailings by the two professors just makes me cringe ......this is too much my brain is about to slowly trickle out of my ears in the form of cerelac

[S_87]

some of these harvard detailings by the two professors just makes me cringe ......this is too much my brain is about to slowly trickle out of my ears in the form of cerelac

ok ill keep quiet now :omg::hiding:

[Ummu Sufyaan]

:sl:

threatening someone is something which no sane human should do

1. Make her feel secure and sakinah - don’t threaten her with divorce

instead of falling for the trap of threatening her you could up her game whenever there's a drop in concentration and complacency is creeping in by saying sara,hasna and batoota will join us as of tomorrow that will make you a strong unit of 4 ,consider them your helpers and you can be the forewoman if you want but i might change because sara is pretty steadfast in everything ''

i hope your future would be smart enough to put the "no co-wife" option in your marriage contract.

and of course there is the other option of getting up and doing whatever you want done, yourself.

this works gentleman use it for motivational purposes and expect improvements in all departments

yes, but only inconsiderate jerks would use that. personally, if my husband tried that, he just may see the back of my hand!

so instead of the divorce threat another woman threat is that what youre saying? hahaha try that and tell us how it works

my thoughts exactly.

[Ummu Sufyaan]

:sl:

Shouldnt they already know!? lool

well yes, but its nicer if he were to say it to them as this shows them that he cares and appreciates her :)

[Cabdullahi]

my previous posts were for comedy purposes and im not a dumb person that i'll do these things...all my siblings are females and i know certain stuff regarding mannerism, looking after and provision

just clarifying things after the received grilling from one of the professors of women studies

[Ummu Sufyaan]

:sl:
^khair, my bad then...

[Ibn Abi Ahmed]

AsSalamOAlaikum WaRehmatuAllah WaBarkatuhu

JazakiAllah Khar for some of the explantions... Heres some more from 30 to 49 :embarrass

32. What if the past effects the future and continues to be an issue

35. What if the brothers/sisters watching or even mum and dad:embarrass

38. How should you deal with small things, and when is the best time to solve isssues and deal with things?

40. what if her thinking is not the best, and she continues to insist

42. why not? and how can you change that?

44. Examples to get me started

46 why? does it make a difference?

49. What if she doesnt like being told:hmm:

JazakAllah Khair in advance

FiAmaaniAllah

:wasalamex

35. You're just feeding her...just do it :D

38. Communication. Communication. Communication. ALWAYS talk to each other and don't be automatically judgmental. Take it easy, relax and work for a win/win situation.

40. You can't really expect her to hold the same opinions as you everywhere..just respect it. If it;s reallly bothering you, explain your side..but don't be overbearing.

42. Women are emotional..so there are times when their mood is off. Be understanding and let it be. Do other things together..you can have a great time even when you're not being intimate.

44. Masha'Allaah...you're the hottest person I know baby. That chicken was the best I've eaten...are you like a professional undercover cook? If Allaah gives me the most beautiful hoor..I'd choose you over her like that (snap finger). Baby, you complete me. Honey, marrying you was the best decision I ever made. etc etc etc. (note these haven't been personally tried by me unfortunately...but they seem to have potential :-\)

[Cabdullahi]

61: force her too watch football matches and to support arsenal

[S_87]

61: force her too watch football matches and to support arsenal

i can think of a lot of women who would force their husbands to watch those matches...

[Najm]

50. Respect and fulfill her rights upon you

53. Keep disputes between the two of you, don’t take it outside

55. Remember you are not always right or perfect yourself

56. Share your happiness and sadness with her

57. Have mercy for her weaknesses

AsSalamOAlaikum WaRehmatuAllah WaBarkatuhu

Wow, so many great answers!! MashaAllah!! InshaAllah, i will do everything i can to make the marriage run smoothly!!! Where does everyone get this kinda info from?

P.s ive printed out that book posted by uhkti Khadija, its amazing! :embarrass

Here's 50 to 60

50. Id prefer a lecture (if possible) on each others rights. Hard to fulfil if you dont know everything:S

53. Ok lets say i need advice on a certain "dispute" who would be the right person to go to for this "advice"?

55. How does one over come this kinda feeling?

56. Sadness? Wont that make her feel upset? And wouldnt that put strain on the relationship

57. Again, whats th best way to overcome/ improve her or my weakness without sounding demanding or hurting each other :S

61. Is honesty always the best policy? Even one has done something reallly reallly stupid? Also is it better if i tell or she finds out <<<< (speaking generally)

JazakiAllah Khair for all the advices in advance..... now i have a lot of rep to give out :statisfie

FiAmaaniAllah

[Cabdullahi]

53. Keep disputes between the two of you, don’t take it outside
the verbal dispute victory should be televised

[S_87]

50. Id prefer a lecture (if possible) on each others rights. Hard to fulfil if you dont know everything:S

aah hard to pinpint everything in detail but it is in regards to treating her well/with respect-emotionally/physically and financially. you might want to read this for more detail:

http://islamqa.com/en/ref/10680/wifes%20rights

53. Ok lets say i need advice on a certain "dispute" who would be the right person to go to for this "advice"?

only if it is severe and you really need someone- someone who she respects and wants the best-her parents?

55. How does one over come this kinda feeling?

hmmm a lot of the time by biting your tongue to avoid conflict. even if at the time you may not think youre wrong but if you spouse is really reiled up-well it takes two to tango and the last thing you want is a slanging match

56. Sadness? Wont that make her feel upset? And wouldnt that put strain on the relationship

do you know of when Muhammed :arabic5: was first visited by Jibraeel alayhissalam? he was in a great state of distress and worry..and he went to his wife Khadija radhiallahu anha for comfort and reassurance. in the same way-your wife is your friend/helper and partner. you should both share each others happiness and be there for each others sadness/worry etc

57. Again, whats th best way to overcome/ improve her or my weakness without sounding demanding or hurting each other :S

everyone has weaknesses and if its not something major, let it go.

61. Is honesty always the best policy? Even one has done something reallly reallly stupid? Also is it better if i tell or she finds out <<<< (speaking generally)

depends on what kinda honesty. if she ever asks you do i look fat be anything but honest. dont EVER say yes.
other than that dont lie to her but she doesnt need to know every single trip up youve made. but then, i dont know what kind of examples you mean :-\

[Cabdullahi]

hmmm a lot of the time by biting your tongue to avoid conflict. even if at the time you may not think youre wrong but if you spouse is really reiled up-well it takes two to tango and the last thing you want is a slanging match


\

Great advice he might have no tongue left after two days

[Ummu Sufyaan]

:wasalamex

55. How does one over come this kinda feeling?

give and take. just let her win sometimes to "train your self" to let it go. also remember, that you aren't perfect so you are bound to be wrong at times.

56. Sadness? Wont that make her feel upset? And wouldnt that put strain on the relationship

it may make her upset, but it'll make her even more upset if she knew you were upset and didnt tell her. if you are happy, she wants to see that her husband is happy, and if you are sad, it will worry her and she would want to share the burden and try advice you and help you out...so no, it wont strain the relationship.

57. Again, whats th best way to overcome/ improve her or my weakness without sounding demanding or hurting each other :S

you have to do it in indirect ways. so if you find her being too emotional over something you deem isn't, just say (in a polite way) something like "look, the reason why that person annoys you is because they know you will be annoyed by it. so if you show that you are not annoyed by it, then they will stop and you'll find that you'll be happoer cos you have nothing to worry about."

and also, just by being there for her and comforting her in her crappy moments is also a great way of having mercy on her weaknesses. so in other words, just letting her be...leaving her alone is another way as well.

:wasalamex
35. You're just feeding her...just do it :D

no, dont do that, it'll embarrass her. badly.

[Najm]

AsSalamOAlaikum WaRehmatuAllah WaBarkatuhu

Alhamdulillah!!! This thread is amazing, its coming to so much practical use :D

JazakAllah Khair for all the help.

FiAmaaniAllah

[Rafeeq]

The same sort of 60 points should be given to act for wives. Else, husbands are already very innocent creatures. LOL.

[nuryanna75]

How about ways to keep the love of your husband? Anyone?

[mammyluty]

yeah how about how to keep ur husband happy 60 ways?

[Grofica]

How about ways to keep the love of your husband? Anyone?

my husband is very easy to keep happy...

1. make coffee on time (first thing in the morning and in the evening.)
2. make sure he always has ciggerettes and lighter
3. refill coffee cup
4. lay out work clothes for next day.
5. refill coffee cup.
6. clean dzezva (thing for coffee)

ha ha ha ha ha ha

[mammyluty]

It makes my husbnd rily hapy wen he finds me reciting his favourites suras in the quran.

[Aisha20]

Just Loved it!

[Cabdullahi]

^ good for you!

I think most if not all brothers should be well acquainted with the things mentioned above to please their wife and to pamper her..inshallah

[imam bukhari]

my husband is very easy to keep happy...

1. make coffee on time (first thing in the morning and in the evening.)
2. make sure he always has ciggerettes and lighter
3. refill coffee cup
4. lay out work clothes for next day.
5. refill coffee cup.
6. clean dzezva (thing for coffee)

ha ha ha ha ha ha

smoking is haraam... ur digging him deeper in hell... along with yourself. he who guides to sin also gets the same sin as the sinner. dont do that. dont displease Allaah for the pleasure of ur husband. he (and u) should know that

[mammyluty]

smoking is haraam... ur digging him deeper in hell... along with yourself. he who guides to sin also gets the same sin as the sinner. dont do that. dont displease Allaah for the pleasure of ur husband. he (and u) should know that

Am nt sure if its a hadith or a jst a sayin bt i heard it frm sheikh feisal on hs lecture sayin that whoeva smokes al his money goes up lyk smoke,meanin it disapears in thin air.

[M.B]

:sl:

What really bothers me is that these days people say its makrooh to smoke since when was smoking makrooh subahnAllah ITS HARAAM. Many people i tell its haraam they come up to me and say noo its makrooh.

why is smoking haram?

Praise be to Allaah.

Perhaps you know that all nations of the world – Muslim and kaafir alike – have now started to fight smoking, because they know that it is very harmful. Islam forbids everything that is harmful, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “There should be no harming or reciprocating harm.”

Undoubtedly there are foods and drinks which are beneficial and good, and others which are harmful and bad. Allaah described our Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) in the following terms (interpretation of the meaning):

“he allows them as lawful At Tayyibaat (i.e. all good and lawful as regards things, deeds, beliefs, persons and foods), and prohibits them as unlawful Al Khabaa’ith (i.e. all evil and unlawful as regards things, deeds, beliefs, persons and foods)

[al-A’raaf 7:157]

Is smoking one of the good and lawful things (al-tayyibaat) or one of the evil and unlawful things (al-khabaa’ith)?

Secondly: it was narrated that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Allaah forbids you to trade gossip, to ask too many questions and to waste money.” And Allaah forbade wasteful extravagance when He said (interpretation of the meaning):

“and eat and drink but waste not by extravagance, certainly He (Allaah) likes not Al Musrifoon (those who waste by extravagance) [al-A’raaf 7:31]

And He described the slaves of the Most Merciful as follows (interpretation of the meaning):

“And those who, when they spend, are neither extravagant nor niggardly, but hold a medium (way) between those (extremes)” [al-Furqaan 25:67]

The whole world now knows that the money spent on smoking is to be considered as money wasted, from which no benefit is gained; indeed, it is money spent on something harmful. If the money which is spent on smoking worldwide were to be collected, it could have saved entire populations who have died of starvation. Is there anyone more foolish that one who holds a dollar bill and sets fire to it? What is the difference between him and the one who smokes? Indeed, the smoker is more foolish, because the folly of the one who burns a dollar bill ends there, whilst the one who smokes burns his money and also harms his body.

Thirdly: how many disasters have been caused by smoking, because of cigarette butts which are thrown away and cause fires. Other disasters have been caused in other ways, as when a house was burned down with its occupants inside, when a man lit his cigarette when there was a gas leak.

Fourthly: how many people are offended by the smell of smokers, especially when you are unfortunate enough to have one of them standing next to you in the mosque. Probably any nasty smell is easier to bear than the smell of the smoker’s mouth when he has just woken up. It is amazing how many women can put up with the smell of their husbands’ mouths! The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) forbade those who had eaten garlic or onions from coming to the mosque so that they would not offend their fellow-worshippers with their smell. The smell of onions and garlic is easier to bear than the smell of the smoker and his mouth.

These are some of the reasons why smoking is haraam

http://www.islam-qa.com/en/ref/10922/smoking