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SINGING AND BEATING OF THE DUFF
It is allowed for the husband to give the women permission at his wedding to announce the wedding with beating on the duff and with allowed singing only. Allowed singing is that which does not contain descriptions of physical beauty or mention of any kind of sin.
There are various ahadeeth about this:
FIRST: On the authority of Ar-Rubai' bint Mu3awwidh, who said: "The Prophet :saws1: entered my house after my wedding night, and sat on my mat as close as you are now sitting to me (the address here is to the one who narrated the hadith from her). Then, some servant girls of ours began beating on the duff and singing about our ancestors who were killed at the battle of Badr. Then one of them said: "And among us is a prophet who knows what tomorrow will bring." The Prophet :saws1: said to her: "Leave this and go back to what you were saying before it." (Narrated by Al Bukhari)
SECOND: On the authority of Aisha, that she took a woman to her husband, a man among the Ansaar. The Prophet :saws1: said to her: "O Aisha did you not have any singing (lit: frivolity) with your procession? Verily the Ansaar love such things." In another version of this hadith, the Prophet :saw1: is reported to have said: "Did you send a servant girl along with her to beat the duff and sing?" (Narrated by Al Bukhari)
THIRD: On the authority of Aamir ibn Saad Al-Bajliy, who said: I entered upon Qardha ibn Kaab and Abu Masood and (he mentioned one other person whose name I can't remember), and saw servant girls beating on the duff and singing. I said: "Are you all in silent acceptance of this and you are among the companions of the Messenger of Allah?!" They said: "Verily, he gave us permission for this at wedding celebrations, and for crying over the dead as long as it is not wailing." (Narrated by Nasai)
It should be noted that none of this give permission for live bands, mixing between men and women, videos, and other evils which are practiced today. All of these practices should be stopped and a wedding involving such practices should not be attended.
And
here's the nasheed you're lookin for...
=]
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