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jimbo123
11-03-2009, 03:09 PM
I'm a 23 year old male and have been working in a good job for about a year. This is a very exciting time for me because I am financially capable of marriage.

I've wanted this for so long (about 10 years) it's actually all I ever think about. Marriage to a good wife... me being a good husband. Both of us living together as practising muslims.

Most people settle down after marriage but I want to achieve more goals. I don't know what... give something back to the world like building a madrasa. Does anyone have any ideas?
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IbnAbdulHakim
11-03-2009, 05:47 PM
well if u want ideas

i was planning on travelling 6 months a year after marriage - going to islamic countries - meeting different teachers and escaping the lands of disbelief.


inshAllaah :)
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Cabdullahi
11-03-2009, 05:54 PM
i was planning on taking cooking lessons at the cooking for male's institute....
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zakirs
11-03-2009, 06:03 PM
How about opening a charity house :)..
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GuestFellow
11-03-2009, 06:15 PM
:sl:

Well I'm gonna start part time job next year while studying. Not sure when I am going to get married but I want to be financially stable. I want to give my wife a very comfortable lifestyle and provide everything that she wants. I was thinking of hiring a maid for my wife if I get into a good firm...
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jimbo123
11-03-2009, 06:24 PM
Originally Posted by IbnAbdulHakim
well if u want ideas

i was planning on travelling 6 months a year after marriage - going to islamic countries - meeting different teachers and escaping the lands of disbelief.


inshAllaah :)
this is a good idea but I don't know if I can take that much time off from work
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IbnAbdulHakim
11-03-2009, 06:39 PM
^ yeah thats why im pursuing a career which fits that lifestyle inshAllaah
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Cabdullahi
11-03-2009, 06:40 PM
Originally Posted by Guestfellow
:sl:

Well I'm gonna start part time job next year while studying. Not sure when I am going to get married but I want to be financially stable. I want to give my wife a very comfortable lifestyle and provide everything that she wants. I was thinking of hiring a maid for my wife if I get into a good firm...
maid? thats a good idea

maid cooks lunch 1

wife cooks lunch 2


and you can have both lunches.......at the same time booya!


and to make it legit in terms of fairness so that the sisters here dont get angry
after consuming lunch 1 and 2 you can make the dessert for yourself
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Iris
11-03-2009, 07:54 PM
After marriage, you won't even believe how busy life will become once you get married, raising good Muslim kids and spending quality time with your wife,inshaAllah may Allah SWT make it a source of endless peace and blessing for you, ameen.
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GuestFellow
11-03-2009, 08:10 PM
Originally Posted by Abdullahii
maid? thats a good idea

maid cooks lunch 1

wife cooks lunch 2

and to make it legit in terms of fairness so that the sisters here dont get angry
after consuming lunch 1 and 2 you can make the dessert for yourself
:sl:

lol not for cooking...just the cleaning. I would like to get a maid for my wife so she would have less work to do...anything to make sure that she has a comfortable life.

and you can have both lunches.......at the same time booya!
That would just make me fat and sick :p
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Ummu Sufyaan
11-04-2009, 01:15 AM
:sl:
Originally Posted by jimbo123
I'm a 23 year old male and have been working in a good job for about a year. This is a very exciting time for me because I am financially capable of marriage.

I've wanted this for so long (about 10 years) it's actually all I ever think about. Marriage to a good wife... me being a good husband. Both of us living together as practising muslims.

Most people settle down after marriage but I want to achieve more goals. I don't know what... give something back to the world like building a madrasa. Does anyone have any ideas?
i think the first step would be to consult your potential/wife.
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abu_musab461
11-04-2009, 02:03 AM
Islamic Primary Schools children or a only uslim oburial groud in UK
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The_Prince
11-04-2009, 02:06 AM
Originally Posted by jimbo123
I'm a 23 year old male and have been working in a good job for about a year. This is a very exciting time for me because I am financially capable of marriage.

I've wanted this for so long (about 10 years) it's actually all I ever think about. Marriage to a good wife... me being a good husband. Both of us living together as practising muslims.

Most people settle down after marriage but I want to achieve more goals. I don't know what... give something back to the world like building a madrasa. Does anyone have any ideas?
work more, give it 2-4 more years, do your goals, and then get married, im almost same age as you, and thats what im doing.
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jimbo123
11-04-2009, 10:46 AM
Originally Posted by The_Prince
work more, give it 2-4 more years, do your goals, and then get married, im almost same age as you, and thats what im doing.
the problem isn't achieving goals, I just don't know what more I could do after marriage - it's been my primary goal for ages. Building a mosque, madrassah or charity house is a good idea because it'll impact the world in a positive way.

After marriage, you won't even believe how busy life will become once you get married, raising good Muslim kids and spending quality time with your wife,inshaAllah may Allah SWT make it a source of endless peace and blessing for you, ameen.
I'm really looking forward to this :D
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Rafeeq
11-06-2009, 05:29 AM
Better marry first, bro. It will complete your life and a way to earn Jaza of fulfilling an Amr (order).
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ChOcCi
11-06-2009, 06:26 AM
[controversy]Start getting to know some girls at your work and the one who has the best personality, get friendly with her and once its "intimate" enough, propose to her. I really hope you dont plan on doing that "blind arranged marriage" thing because despite popular belief, their no better than those blind love marriages as some people were not meant to be together.. There should a balance between the both. [/controversy]

This should give you a couple more years at hand to work on your job and you will know who your in for once you get married. Since both of you will be working at the same place, both of you will know how much work demands and there wont be much quarrels about work which trust me, is a life saver.
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jimbo123
11-06-2009, 08:22 PM
Originally Posted by ChOcCi
[controversy]Start getting to know some girls at your work and the one who has the best personality, get friendly with her and once its "intimate" enough, propose to her. I really hope you dont plan on doing that "blind arranged marriage" thing because despite popular belief, their no better than those blind love marriages as some people were not meant to be together.. There should a balance between the both. [/controversy]

This should give you a couple more years at hand to work on your job and you will know who your in for once you get married. Since both of you will be working at the same place, both of you will know how much work demands and there wont be much quarrels about work which trust me, is a life saver.
Unfortunately there aren't any girls at my workplace. But I know what you mean... I've always fancied this girl I used to go to college with but alas it wasn't mean to be.

I don't think there's anything wrong with arranged marriages though. You can meet a few times and even beforehand find out what her personality is like from family members.
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Eliphaz
11-06-2009, 09:51 PM
Originally Posted by ChOcCi
[controversy]Start getting to know some girls at your work and the one who has the best personality, get friendly with her and once its "intimate" enough, propose to her. I really hope you dont plan on doing that "blind arranged marriage" thing because despite popular belief, their no better than those blind love marriages as some people were not meant to be together.. There should a balance between the both. [/controversy]

This should give you a couple more years at hand to work on your job and you will know who your in for once you get married. Since both of you will be working at the same place, both of you will know how much work demands and there wont be much quarrels about work which trust me, is a life saver.
Blind arranged marriage is not the same thing as arranged marriage. If you think about it every marriage is arranged (meaning planned out). But as Muslims you have to be careful not falling into haram which is likely if you "get friendly with her".

Every culture is different, just recently I learned that Arabs are not as into arranged marriages as much as South Asians. But at the end of the day when an unmarried man and woman are alone the third is shaytan, so as liberal as I am, I would have to say at least make sure to meet with a mahram and avoid the prolongued office drama which could go any which way at the end of the day. ^o)
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Ummu Sufyaan
11-07-2009, 08:47 AM
Originally Posted by ChOcCi
[controversy]Start getting to know some girls at your work and the one who has the best personality, get friendly with her and once its "intimate" enough, propose to her. I really hope you dont plan on doing that "blind arranged marriage" thing because despite popular belief, their no better than those blind love marriages as some people were not meant to be together.. There should a balance between the both. [/controversy]

This should give you a couple more years at hand to work on your job and you will know who your in for once you get married. Since both of you will be working at the same place, both of you will know how much work demands and there wont be much quarrels about work which trust me, is a life saver.
if such a man came to propose to my daughter, he'd be lucky if he got away with a backhander ^o)
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Trumble
11-07-2009, 01:35 PM
Originally Posted by Iris
After marriage, you won't even believe how busy life will become once you get married, raising good Muslim kids and spending quality time with your wife,inshaAllah may Allah SWT make it a source of endless peace and blessing for you, ameen.
Only fair to warn you from experience that what women actually mean by "spending quality time with your wife" is "forget doing what you like to do and start doing what I think you should do". :D
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Caller الداعي
11-07-2009, 03:56 PM
Only fair to warn you from experience that what women actually mean by "spending quality time with your wife" is "forget doing what you like to do and start doing what I think you should do".
lol nice 1 !!!!
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Muslim Woman
11-07-2009, 04:25 PM
:sl:

Originally Posted by jimbo123
Unfortunately there aren't any girls at my workplace. .

Alhamdulillah.


It is not allowed for any Muslim men to be friendly with many girls and spend time with them in private .

To the OP bro , thanks for ur good intention to do something positive after marriage. May Allah gives u best rewards. Helping the needy and orphans , spreading the message of Islam , encourage your Muslims brothers to get married as soon as possible etc etc u can do InshaAllah.
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Muslim Woman
11-07-2009, 04:30 PM
Salaam/Peace

Originally Posted by Trumble
Only fair to warn you from experience that what women actually mean by "spending quality time with your wife" is "forget doing what you like to do and start doing what I think you should do". :D

:p

Don't worry ; Remember : A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
-- Milton Berle
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