format_quote Originally Posted by
Mohamed_
Salam Aleykum,
I'm here to ask something which I'm not sure about it was right.
So umm... I live with my non-muslim mother and a non-muslim step-father. They are christians or atheist, I don't know.
My mom makes me food every morning for school. She also did one day like on the other ones. She knows that I'm a muslim and that I don't eat any forbidden food.
I came to school and I was hungry, took out a sandwich out of my bag, begun to eat it. I ate the first one, then wanted to begin to eat the second one. I've recognized the taste of the salami was strange. Actually, I never felt that taste since I converted to Islam. I opened my 2nd. sandwhich and saw that's that kind of salami which made of porks.
I got very angry, and I was very angry at my mother. I felt like she lied to me. But I was angry at myself as well for not checking the meat in the sandwich before begun to eat.
I went home and checked the frigider I found that salami in it and checked what's in that.
And there was written 'pork'. I yelled at my mom, and asked why did she make me food which contains pork. She did not say anything, she looked at me like I was being an idiot. I think she thought it totally fine she put pork meat into my food.
I got very angry then and told to her 'I hope Allah will ask you why you've done it to me'. She was still being quiet.
I went into my room, she came in and said 'there's nothing wrong with pork'...
The 'funniest' thing is to me, she was a muslim for 2 years.
So, here's my question. Was it haram to get angry at my mom and yelled at her?
Asalaamu Alaikum Wr Wb, Jazakallah for sharing this with us my brother.
The Prophet is reported to have said:
"Indeed, gentleness adds more beauty to the atmosphere it reposes therein."
(Muslim)
Hazrat ibn Abbas narrates from the Prophet that a person whose parents are alive and he obeys them, listens to and respects them, then Allah will open two doors of paradise for him. But if one of his parents is not happy with him, then Allah will not be happy with him either. Then someone asked the Prophet , “Even if they are oppressors?”
The Prophet replied, “Yes, even if they are oppressors.”
It is said, a person who disobeys his parents, or disrespects them and does not listen to them, Allah will open two doors of hell for him. And if he disrespects only one of them, then Allah will only open one door of hell for him.
Above all, this requires patience and self-restraint. Learn about the tremendousness of being good to one's parents, and keep this in mind.
When troubled, tried, or tested, turn to Allah in earnest, heart-felt supplication (dua), for He has told us to, "Call upon Me: I will answer you."
The fire of anger is put out by the water of love: respond to her harshness with love, and soon you will find things changing.
Allah told the Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him and give him peace) in the Qur'an,
003.159 It was by the mercy of Allah that You were lenient with them, for if You had been stern and fierce of heart they would have dispersed from round about thee. So pardon them and ask forgiveness for them and consult with them upon the conduct of affairs. And when You art resolved, then put your trust in Allah. Lo! Allah loves those who put their trust (in Him).
003.160 If Allah is your helper none can overcome you, and if He withdraw His help from you, who is there who can help you after Him? In Allah let believers put their trust.
Allah, the exalted, ordered us to treat them kindly even when they try to make us associate partners to Allah.
When being kind to one’s parents, we do not expect a reward from them, but we expect a reward from Allah.
If the parents are not kind and do not appreciate the kindness of their children, then one has to be patient, bearing the difficulties and be steadfast in doing good to them, and the outcome will be good, Insha Allah.
So respond to your mother with kindness and tell her in the most beautiful of manners using wisdom that you cannot eat anything haraam especially pork and that you want her to respect this. Next time prepare your own lunch brother and take extra care in what you eat as your mother and step father are non Muslims so there food won't be halal for you.