Torn between two

[AnonymousPoster]

I need some guidance...

I want to wear the hijab, i think its so beautiful but whenever i think of actually doing it i get terrified of being discriminated against or having certain opportunities closed to me...and yes i KNOW only what Allah swt decides comes true but how do i get past that fear???

Also, the people around me encourage me not to do it, they constantly tell me how beautiful my hair is and how hard it will be for me to find a husband or get a great job if im covered....

I dont know, i hope you all will be understanding and just give me some help on what i should do :embarrass

[Hamza Asadullah]

I need some guidance...

I want to wear the hijab, i think its so beautiful but whenever i think of actually doing it i get terrified of being discriminated against or having certain opportunities closed to me...and yes i KNOW only what Allah swt decides comes true but how do i get past that fear???

Also, the people around me encourage me not to do it, they constantly tell me how beautiful my hair is and how hard it will be for me to find a husband or get a great job if im covered....

I dont know, i hope you all will be understanding and just give me some help on what i should do :embarrass

Asalaamu Alaikum Wr Wb, my sister don't worry about what the world says or how it percieves you because it is not between them and you and it never was. For it is ONLY between you and Allah and your reward is with Allah and it is ONLY for him are you wearing it!

...Shaythan does'nt want you to wear hijaab and he thinks you would look beautiful without it but Allah wants you to wear hijaab and thinks you look beautiful with it so who will you want to impress?

...any man that wants you without hijaab is the worst kind of partner a women can have.

...surely women are jewels and the beauty of those jewels are only fgor the spouse to see and admire. Then will you not want to marry a person who wants you to conceal your beauty for the pleasure of Allah and for himself?

...Those who want to see your destruction don't want you to wear hijaab whereas those who want you saved will want you to wear it so who will you listen to?

...The one who hates you and is your enemy (Shaythan) and would want nothing less than to see you burn for eternity does'nt want you to wear hijaab but...

..The one who has created you and given you life and everything you can see,hear touch and feel has ordered you to wear. Then who should you listen to?

My sister this world is but a few hours and then we will return to Allah! Rememeber that our employer is Allah for it is his ONLY his will whatever job we will get so have FULL hope,reliance,trust and faith in him and ONLY him for he can change the hearts of any person and he does what he wants and is in control of everything and NOTHING is in control of him.

No one can hurt or do anything to you if it is not for the will of Allah for a leaf does not fall without Allah's will.

ONLY Allah opens opportunities and doors for us not employers or people, then will you not ask of Allah to open up doors and opportunities for you? Do you think he will not do what is best for you? Surely we do not know what is best for us but we think we do.

If it does'nt happen then Allah has something better for you.

Your rizq(sustainance) is already written for you and those who chase after this life will only have what is written for them and nothing else but those who chase after the hereafter will have what is written for them and more. Those who thank Allah and are appreciative will have even more. For Allah loves those who are thankful and appreciative.

So do things the right way and supplicate to him sincerely and whatever is best for you will happen inshallah!

So let us hold our heads up high and be proud of who we are and our identity so that others can look and be inspired to look into Islam aswell so that Allah may open their hearts to the truth!

Be proud of your identity as a Muslimah for do you want to look like a non Muslim women? Are you ashamed that we as Muslims are the chosen ones? Be proud and hold the banner of Islam where ever you go. Those who want you to let go of the banner of Islam let go of them from your life for they are not true friends to you and remember the true friend is the one who will take you towards Paradise and the bad friend is the one who will lead you towards destruction so which friend will you choose?

Disregard these fakes and find true Muslimah's who will take you towards Jannah and make you proud to be a Muslimah with hijaab. Remember hijaab is not just a cloth for it is internal aswell as external modesty.

So have full hope, trust, faith and reliance upon Allah.

Here is a short poem i found from a new Muslimah who wanted to express how proud she was wearing the hijaab:

As i get ready to go into the outside world
I look in the mirror
What do i see?
My beauty
Then i slip on the hijab
why?
I cover my outer beauty
So you take a look at my inner beauty
I step into the cruel and unjust society
of this "free" country
i look at avoiding eyes and stares
i hear whispering from every side
i think to myself "i am not here to please everyone"
i am here to please Allah
then i hold my head with the hijab high
Allah has chosen this jihad for me to overcome
yes this is my jihad

[desert winds]

i had the exact problem with myself!
your hair is sooo pretty to hide!
whos going to marry you like this?
people will laugh at us!
etc etc
but i did it anyway and it wasnt easy
you just need to stop thinking and do it! bite the bullet!

[cat eyes]

:sl:my dad kept on saying that to about my hair but the hair of the woman is what makes a woman more tasty to men thats why the hijab protects the woman don't let people poison your mind. the hijab protects you from loads of things believe it or not. i can assure you that you will find a husband. there is lots of men who love modesty in a woman. do you know there is people that when a person wants to become closer to islam so all they would love to do is lead you astray. they want you to be like them because it saddens them that any one wants to better there life by coming closer to Allah swt so beware of these people. they have bad intentions and they don't care about anybody:wa:

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[*charisma*]

Assalamu Alaikum

Just do it. If wearing hijaab is something you often contemplate upon, it will ALWAYS be on your mind regardless of what everyone around you says because you want to do it especially when you know its right, and it won't leave your mind until you do. Believe it or not, the easy part is having to deal with everyone else. Shaytan is going to want to push you away by enhancing your fears, but really you've got nothing to fear.

You have beautiful hair that Allah is testing you with, pass His test by covering it. I've had nonMuslim male classmates tell me how much they love the idea of hijaab after explaining it to them. I've had girls in my class asking me to bring them one so that they could wear it for a day with me. I've had countless countless very kind nonMuslims who have told me how beautiful they see hijaab on me and how much respect they have for me for following my beliefs. And sure you're going to get some fools here and there once in a while, but you're going to get those regardless cuz they'd pick on anyone who's different and it's not like they're usually people who you're going to see every single day or anything.

Also, in regards to telling you that you won't find a husband or that it'd be more difficult is nonsense! If anything, IF ANYTHING, maintaining your islamic character and mannerism and adding the hijaab would bring you the BEST of brothers! In fact, there are some guys who think a girl is more open when she's not covered versus when she is, despite if the girl is really modest (minus the hijaab) and they may try to flirt with her because of it. This is the wrong type of attention any girl should get. Hijaab is an obligation for a muslim woman, just like salaah and fasting, so whether you decide to do it now or later, you're eventually going to have to do it, and you're going to want to be with someone who supported it from the beginning and someone who appreciates Allah's laws knowing that it was prescribed partially to keep our husbands feeling secure and happy.

I'm going to stop myself from continuing because I get carried away with this specific topic. :D

My sincere advice to you though, is just pick a day where you know your iman might increase (like Friday, or a day you decide to fast, or maybe a day you go to the masjid, etc) and just start. Your first week is going to be hard because its new, shaytan will keep whispering, and the people around you won't be used to it, but afterward, it'll feel as necessary for you to wear as does a shirt, and you'll love it more than anything and learn to appreciate it more and more. Whenever you feel discouraged just say a'udhu billah minashaytan arajeem, remind yourself of death when you're out (this helped me a lot because I knew for a fact that if I died amongst the public, I'd want to die with my hijaab on and I want people to know right away that I'm a muslim), and keep reading about hijaab just to make sure you understand it's purpose, not just for your own benefit but also because you're going to have people asking you questions once in a while about your faith and you're going to want to know how to answer them well enough that they understand.

Block everyone else...hijaab is strictly between you and Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. You'll get yourself a man don't worry lol and inshallah if it's destined for you, then a really good job as well. What people fail to realize is that everything has an equal chance of happening because everything occurs through the will of Allah. If Allah wills something to happen for you, then it will happen regardless if the entire world is crumbling before your eyes, and if He doesn't, then it wont. Hijaab doesn't control what good or bad will happen to you, but Allah will definitely be much more pleased with you if you wore hijaab and make it so that if anything good or bad that happens to you as you are going out of your way to please Allah, then these good or bad events will be for your benefit rather than your destruction in the end, bi'dhnillahi wa ta'ala.

fi aman Allah
w'alaikum asalaam

[Ali_008]

:sl:
All these are just trials in the way doing something for Allah (Subhaanahu Wa Taala). If you show some guts and faith then inshAllah, it will become very easy for you and you won't be bothered about what others are thinking. Go through the following article, I hope it helps:
http://www.islamicboard.com/world-af...-its-like.html

:w:

[Danah]

:sl:

dear sis, lets take their excuses one by one:

I need some guidance...
they constantly tell me how beautiful my hair is

its because your hair is beautiful, you are not showing it to anyone, its so precious to you that you wanna protect that grace that Allah give you from the eyes of non-mahram people.

and how hard it will be for me to find a husband or get a great job if im covered....

The rizq "wealth and grace" is only from Allah, Allah is the giver no one else. Your hair wont bring you a husband or a good job. If you are not wearing hijab and Allah is not welling to grant you a good job, then you wont get that job even if everything seems to work.....because Allah is not welling to.

So, don't place Hijab as a wall between you and Allah and between you and what you are wishing for.

Do you think that the man want a wife that everyone see her beauty already? think of it this way. You are going to a chocolate store, and you saw two pieces of chocolate for the customers to taste. One is still having its cover while the other is not covered.....
Seriously, which one you will take to taste? the uncovered one that you are not sure how many germs or hands touched it? or the covered one that you are sure that no one opened it and touched it?

sure you will take the new one because its covered, protected......this is the way that hijab protect the pride of the Muslimah. So do it, and ignore all the negative comments. May Allah be with you.


feel free to PM me dear sis if you need any help :)

:w:

[Salahudeen]

won't be hard for you to find a husband trust me, lots of brothers looking for a girl who dresses modestly and doesn't flaunt herself like a cheap (bad word here).

and you'll only get praticing genuine guys coming after you inshallah not no losers who wanna mess around and do bad stuff. Guys who are serious about marrying you.

I felt like you do when I was growing my beard but I thought to myself what if I die in this state and I'm raised up on the day of judgement without a beard.

I know it's hard but trust me you'll look so much better modesty is an attractive quality in a individual. Don't think you won't find a husband, do you really want a guy who rejects you cos you wear hijaab the answer is no right, so by wearing hijaab you'll get guys who are like minded individuals.

you want a guy who see's the beauty in a women who wears hijaab and dresses modestly not a guy who's heart has become so corrupted that he wants his women to walk around half naked for all the men. You want a man who's close to the deen of Allah and such men won't go after a women who walks around not covered up.

I thought to myself when I was growing my beard

"I want to marry a praticing muslimah and obviously a praticing muslimah isn't going to accept a man who's clean shaven like a girl so why am I worrying for, by growing my beard I'll only be attracting the type of women that I want to marry" But mostly it was due to loads of encouragment from a certain some 1 ;D may Allah reward them for giving me positive advice.

it's the same with you, by wearing hijaab inshallah you'll be getting proposals from the type of men that you want which is praticing Muslim men with beards.

[AnonymousPoster]

Thank you all soooooooo much for your kind words. I really truly do appreciate it. I take everything you said with me and inshallah i will prepare myself with your help and Allah swt to start wearing it inshallah

[AlHoda]

:sl:

I am glad to hear that, just ignore them. May Allah bless you for this beuatiful step in Islam.

:wa:

[Danah]

Thank you all soooooooo much for your kind words. I really truly do appreciate it. I take everything you said with me and inshallah i will prepare myself with your help and Allah swt to start wearing it inshallah

That's very great to hear sis :)
Let us know how it will be at your first day with hijab, we will be waiting you at this thread inshaAllah :statisfie

[IbnAbdulHakim]

any man who doesnt want to marry you due to hijaab ISNT WORTH MARRYING.

Any job you get due to exposure can only lead to the destruction of your soul and greater destruction in the hereafter.


and if you strive for Allah, you only get the best of both worlds.



Assalamu Alaikum

[Donia]

I need some guidance...

I want to wear the hijab, i think its so beautiful but whenever i think of actually doing it i get terrified of being discriminated against or having certain opportunities closed to me...and yes i KNOW only what Allah swt decides comes true but how do i get past that fear???

Also, the people around me encourage me not to do it, they constantly tell me how beautiful my hair is and how hard it will be for me to find a husband or get a great job if im covered....

I dont know, i hope you all will be understanding and just give me some help on what i should do :embarrass

Asalaamu alaikum, sis.

I understand COMPLETELY what you are going through. I really believe this is shaytan trying to prevent you from doing right. You are seriously considering doing something that you believe you need to do and will bring you closer to Allah insha'Allah and shaytan is trying to stop you. Remember shaytan is an enemy. Treat him like one. My personal humble opinion.
Sis, don't listen to what everybody says. Easier said than done. On the day of judgement, it is only going to be you and Allah. If your hair is beautiful, then even more reason for you to cover it.
As far as the husband part, just think that by wearing the hijab you will be attracting the right type of husband. Not somebody who is possibly just interested in you for how you look because looks fade.
The job thing is a legitimate concern but if someone is going to discriminate against you because you are dressed modestly and have a head scarf on, then why would you want to work there anyway?
Allah does not put on us a burden more than we can bear and Allah knows best.
May Allah make it easy for you and make you victorious over the shaytan. Ameen.
Salaam sis.