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AnonymousPoster
12-25-2009, 05:28 PM
salaam

My cousin wants to get a divorce from her husband as he has been abusing her for a long time. They don't live like a normal husband and wife. Now she has met a man online and she says they are in love and they tell each other things like this all the time. Is she allowed to talk to this man and plan marriage with him because she is going to get divorced from her husband anyway? Is the man also wrong to talk to her while she is still married? Are they committing a serious sin?
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Hamza Asadullah
12-25-2009, 05:59 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by AnonymousGender
salaam

My cousin wants to get a divorce from her husband as he has been abusing her for a long time. They don't live like a normal husband and wife. Now she has met a man online and she says they are in love and they tell each other things like this all the time. Is she allowed to talk to this man and plan marriage with him because she is going to get divorced from her husband anyway? Is the man also wrong to talk to her while she is still married? Are they committing a serious sin?
Asalaamu Alaikum Wr Wb, most certainly this is a major sin for she is still married to him so how can she already plan a marriage with another man? She should stop contact with him immediatley and repent sincerely for talking to and lusting over another man whilst she is still married.

In Islam the most disliked of all permissable acts is divorce and divorce should only take place after all avenues have been exhausted. She should get an elder of the family or community involved in order to mediate and try and resolve any issues between her and her husband.

She should get in touch with a reliable and experienced scholar immediatley as he would advise her best as to what the next steps should be but whatever happens she should stop contact with this man immediatley as she is still married and this is a very major sin.

May Allah save us.
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AnonymousPoster
12-25-2009, 06:50 PM
I'm not the thread starter, but what if the husband doesn't pray and beats the wife and doesn't fulfill her rights and provide for her, and she's providing for him and he's taking her money and makes her work.

and doesn't pratice the religion and oppresses his wife and they've tried seeking help from outside people like imam's but the husband just won't change his ways and doesn't even attempt to change his ways.

and whenever the wife tries to tell him to establish the religion of Islam and pray he begins getting abusive with her and angry, and sometimes hits her for telling him to pray.
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Hamza Asadullah
12-25-2009, 07:22 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by AnonymousGender
I'm not the thread starter, but what if the husband doesn't pray and beats the wife and doesn't fulfill her rights and provide for her, and she's providing for him and he's taking her money and makes her work.

and doesn't pratice the religion and oppresses his wife and they've tried seeking help from outside people like imam's but the husband just won't change his ways and doesn't even attempt to change his ways.

and whenever the wife tries to tell him to establish the religion of Islam and pray he begins getting abusive with her and angry, and sometimes hits her for telling him to pray.
Asalaamu Alaikum Wr Wb, Islam shows us the best way to conduct ourselves with our marriage partners and both the wife and husband have rights over each other which they both have an obligation to fulfill but if any of those rights are not fulfilled or if either the husband or wife is mistreated then Islam does not allow this however these issues are not for us lay people to deal with.

If a husband or wife have any issues in regards to their marriage then they should first try to solve it themselves through effective communication and if the problems persist then they should think about getting an elder of the family or community to mediate their conflicts in order to come to a resolution.

If problems still persist then they can go to a counsellor and as also get advice from a reliable and experienced scholar as this is their realm of expertise and they would provide the best nasiha(advice) in accordance with Islam.

So i would advise the sister to see a reliable and experienced scholar immediatley.

and Allah knows best.
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zakirs
12-26-2009, 01:21 PM
I'm not the thread starter, but what if the husband doesn't pray and beats the wife and doesn't fulfill her rights and provide for her, and she's providing for him and he's taking her money and makes her work.

and doesn't pratice the religion and oppresses his wife and they've tried seeking help from outside people like imam's but the husband just won't change his ways and doesn't even attempt to change his ways.

and whenever the wife tries to tell him to establish the religion of Islam and pray he begins getting abusive with her and angry, and sometimes hits her for telling him to pray.

:sl: in this case may be she can get a divorce ?? ..

I anycase she cannot marry or court non marham men untill 3 months after divorce.She can send her father or sbro to talk to the other man abt marriage
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Innocent Soul
12-26-2009, 01:49 PM
Assalmaualaikum
She can get a divorce.But she can't chat with the man untill they get married.She has to wait for a limited time I don't remember the exact time.May be three or one month.

She can send her father or sbro to talk to the other man abt marriage
This will be good.
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Muslim Woman
12-26-2009, 02:04 PM
:sl:

format_quote Originally Posted by AnonymousGender
... but what if the husband doesn't pray and beats the wife and doesn't fulfill her rights

If husband is bad , it does not give wife any right to commit any sin. If it's not possible
for her to tolerate husband , then she should ask / go for divorce and pass her iddat time. Then she is allowed to get married . But secret chat or meet with a man in a private place - these are not allowed.
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