Washing Hair Everytime!!HELP

[AnonymousPoster]

Salaamaalikum warahmatuallh

Halo everyone. I have a question that has been killing me for along time now. I am happily married and my husband and we have a really strong sexual relationship. We end up having relations 3-4 times a day sometimes and it is really becoming extremely hard for me to wash my hair every time for prayers. I have very long and coarse hair. It really takes me long and hard time to manage them and make them pretty again only to wet them again!!:heated::heated::heated: Alot of times I don't enjoy myself and relax because I am thinking about how hard it is going to be washing them after this. And I even asked him to let me cut them short but he is so in love with them and begs me not to. I really don't want to start rejecting him when he is in the mood just because I don't want to wet my hair! I know it is not permissible for me to do that. Subxaanaalah it is really not an easy work and takes a lot more than any other task i do during the day. Is it ok for me to wash my body only and not my hair every time islamicaly? like I can put a shower cap or something to stop them from getting wet!
Please help imsadimsadimsadimsad

[MUNIRAH]

salaam sis,

Perhaps you and your husband should agree on convenient times like at night after the isha prayer..then you don't have to wash it right away until the next morning...just an opinion...hope someone else can help

[Cabdullahi]

Salaamaalikum warahmatuallh

Halo everyone. I have a question that has been killing me for along time now. I am happily married and my husband and we have a really strong sexual relationship. We end up having relations 3-4 times a day sometimes and it is really becoming extremely hard for me to wash my hair every time for prayers. I have very long and coarse hair. It really takes me long and hard time to manage them and make them pretty again only to wet them again!!:heated::heated::heated: Alot of times I don't enjoy myself and relax because I am thinking about how hard it is going to be washing them after this. And I even asked him to let me cut them short but he is so in love with them and begs me not to. I really don't want to start rejecting him when he is in the mood just because I don't want to wet my hair! I know it is not permissible for me to do that. Subxaanaalah it is really not an easy work and takes a lot more than any other task i do during the day. Is it ok for me to wash my body only and not my hair every time islamicaly? like I can put a shower cap or something to stop them from getting wet!
Please help imsadimsadimsadimsad

How about you tell him to wash it thoroughly for you each time while you put your feet up and relax?

[cat eyes]

you don't have to use the shampoo all the time just water and make sure every hair is completely wet. to much shampooing will not be good so whats the problem sis :) seems like you have a healthy marriage so why upset things

Hey there! Looks like you're enjoying the discussion, but you're not signed up for an account.

When you create an account, you can participate in the discussions and share your thoughts. You also get notifications, here and via email, whenever new posts are made. And you can like posts and make new friends.
Sign Up

[Raudha]

EDIT...... :exhausted

[AnonymousPoster]

you don't have to use the shampoo all the time just water and make sure every hair is completely wet. to much shampooing will not be good so whats the problem sis :) seems like you have a healthy marriage so why upset things

thanks but that is the issue! shampoo isn't the problem it is the water itself...water is my hair's worst enemy..it messes up everything...and on top of that I have extremely curly hair so I have to straighten them every time and once I do I can't wet it coz it goes back to being curly and unmanageable!:heated:totally annoying. alhamddullilahhh i am happy with everything in my marriage but just want to get rid of that extra stress of dealing with my hair every second. Do I absolutely have to wash my hair if I wash every other part of my body soo thoroughly?? Please someone give evidence from Quran or Hadiths

[AnonymousPoster]

How about you tell him to wash it thoroughly for you each time while you put your feet up and relax?

lol that is exactly what he says to me all the time.But it doesn't ease the situation and he has no idea how to go about it so he ends up tangling my hair together. Thanks tho good thought.

[Cabdullahi]

lol that is exactly what he says to me all the time.But it doesn't ease the situation and he has no idea how to go about it so he ends up tangling my hair together. Thanks tho good thought.

I have two words for you = go bald! :thumbs_up

[Snowflake]

:sl:

Shaykh ‘Abd al-‘Azeez ibn Baaz (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: Women who find it difficult to wash their heads when doing ghusl from janaabah should be told that it is sufficient to pour water over their heads three times so that the water reaches every part of their heads, with no need to undo their braids or change anything of their hairstyle which they find it hard to change. They should also be reminded of the great reward they will have with Allaah, the good consequences and the everlasting good life that they will have in the abode of honour if they are patient in adhering to the rulings of sharee’ah.

Majmoo’ Fataawa al-Shaykh ‘Abd al-‘Azeez ibn Baaz (may Allaah have mercy on him), 6/236

From this I understand that only the roots need to be wetted, not the entire hair to the tips? Please can someone knowledgeable confirm this?


More questions and answers regarding major impurity.

http://islamqa.com/en/cat/39&pp=50


:wa:

[AnonymousPoster]

:sl:




From this I understand that only the roots need to be wetted, not the entire hair to the tips? Please can someone knowledgeable confirm this?


More questions and answers regarding major impurity.

http://islamqa.com/en/cat/39&pp=50


:wa:

Thanks sister I would love to have someone conform that too.:D

[Donia]

Is it possible for you after washing your hair to just comb it and put it back in a simple ponytail instead of redoing it all throughout the day.
Then maybe wait until night time to do your final wash and straighten it for the next day or morning, whichever is more convenient.
Just a suggestion.

[anonymous]

Why don't you just do a permanent hair straigtening?

It's when you make your hair permanently straight, even if it's wet it will remain straight.

It last for about 5-6 months, or until your hair grows back.

A good one costs about 200$, but you can find hair salons that will charge you much less, and still give you a nice perm.

Just an idea.

[Snowflake]

Thanks sister I would love to have someone conform that too.:D

Aw inshaAllah sis. It does seem like that is what it means. It does say that there is no need to undo braids which means there is awareness of the possibility that some hair may be left dry. I'm almost 100% sure it's ok to only wet the roots in difficulty. I'm just scared to say it with 100% certainty. Just in case.

Did you read the other fatwas? There may be a similar question that has been answered in more detail inshaAllah. :)


:wa:

[anonymous]

Oh one more thing, ^^, it can damage your hair...if you do it often. But once won't do much damage I believe.

[Cabdullahi]

Why don't you just do a permanent hair straigtening?

It's when you make your hair permanently straight, even if it's wet it will remain straight.

It last for about 5-6 months, or until your hair grows back.

A good one costs about 200$, but you can find hair salons that will charge you much less, and still give you a nice perm.

Just an idea.

Does this involve the creamy crack that contains sodium hydroxide then i would personally tell the sister to not use any chemical relaxers...

[Insaanah]

:sl:

With regards to the issue at hand, the issue of a woman washing her hair for ghusl after janaabah, see the following link regarding an almost identical question:

http://www.islamqa.com/en/ref/27065/washing%20hair

Women who find it difficult to wash their heads when doing ghusl from janaabah should be told that it is sufficient to pour water over their heads three times so that the water reaches every part of their heads, with no need to undo their braids or change anything of their hairstyle which they find it hard to change.

Allah knows best.

:sl:

[AnonymousPoster]

Why don't you just do a permanent hair straigtening?

It's when you make your hair permanently straight, even if it's wet it will remain straight.

It last for about 5-6 months, or until your hair grows back.

A good one costs about 200$, but you can find hair salons that will charge you much less, and still give you a nice perm.

Just an idea.

are you talking about hair relaxers??? or is there something else because I would love to try anything other than hair relaxers. I have yet to meet someone who got good results with hair relaxers. It damages hair alot. I know of a friend that had serious problems from children' hair relaxers...

[Cabdullahi]

^ Dont try it ever

[AnonymousPoster]

JAZAKUMALLAH KHAYR to all the brothers and sis that responded to my post. :statisfie:statisfieKnow that I know for sure I have to wet my hair and there is no way around it...it would be helpful if anyone can tell me how to make the process easier,someone suggested permanent hair relaxers and I want more ideas inshaaalah I am sure there is alot of sisters that have the same issue what are your secrets?:hmm::D

[AnonymousPoster]

^ Dont try it ever

did you have a bad experience with it??

[Cabdullahi]

did you have a bad experience with it??

do i have long thick hair?

lol the answer is no but i will tell you something even a school child would know sodium hydroxide massaged on the scalp is suicidal

inshallah you're problem is solved ameen

peace

[Nσσя'υℓ Jαииαн]

Sodium hydroxide is no goody :p Thats all I can say..

[Cabdullahi]

science student ^ ?

maybe you can convince our sister the dangers sodium hydroxide has on the skin

[anonymous]

Lol I guess it's called hair relaxers, yes.

Um well my friend did one her hair was straight for a few months then went back to normal. I can't tell you how ultimately *dangerous* and *horrendous* it is, but I think this can probably be attributed to the drug store do-it-yourself brand. Going to a nice salon you trust and get it done there, I'd try it. But then again I know alot of people who did it and it when just fine...maybe there's future side-effects? I never really heard anything negative about it apart that it can damage your hair if poor brands are used.

it's known that it does damage your hair, but to a certain extent if done frequently...

anyway i'm not an expert on this it's just a suggestion, and I can reassure you I know people who did do it and it worked:)..

Straigthening your hair frequently is bound to damage your hair too...maybe even more so.

Any other suggestions I can give you...why not go curly? Buy some mousse and instead of straightening it, apply mousse it'll look just as good.

or...buy a cream that is made for hair straightening, that protects your hair and makes it easier for you to straighten it. I am not sure what it's called, but the label description will tell you...

it'll make straightening your hair faster and easier.

Buy a straightener that you can use on wet hair(IT'S SAFE) (although I had one, I wouldn't recommend it, it's not very enjoyable alot of steam comes out)

ehhh..I can't think of anything else...if I do ill let you know.good luck!

[AnonymousPoster]

Any other suggestions I can give you...why not go curly? Buy some mousse and instead of straightening it, apply mousse it'll look just as good.

or...buy a cream that is made for hair straightening, that protects your hair and makes it easier for you to straighten it. I am not sure what it's called, but the label description will tell you...

it'll make straightening your hair faster and easier.

Buy a straightener that you can use on wet hair(IT'S SAFE) (although I had one, I wouldn't recommend it, it's not very enjoyable alot of steam comes out)

ehhh..I can't think of anything else...if I do ill let you know.good luck!

Oh thanks sooo much sister(right?), you have some really helpful suggestions. I love curly too but usually I straighten them before I use the curling iron.I have no clue why I do that!I just got use to taking things to the next level.I think I am somewhat overworking myself when it comes to my hair and I agree I am somewhat of a perfectionist.Thanks so much with all these tips again.

[OurIslamic]

Sounds like someone needs to control their nafs...

[Hamza Asadullah]

Salaamaalikum warahmatuallh

Halo everyone. I have a question that has been killing me for along time now. I am happily married and my husband and we have a really strong sexual relationship. We end up having relations 3-4 times a day sometimes and it is really becoming extremely hard for me to wash my hair every time for prayers. I have very long and coarse hair. It really takes me long and hard time to manage them and make them pretty again only to wet them again!!:heated::heated::heated: Alot of times I don't enjoy myself and relax because I am thinking about how hard it is going to be washing them after this. And I even asked him to let me cut them short but he is so in love with them and begs me not to. I really don't want to start rejecting him when he is in the mood just because I don't want to wet my hair! I know it is not permissible for me to do that. Subxaanaalah it is really not an easy work and takes a lot more than any other task i do during the day. Is it ok for me to wash my body only and not my hair every time islamicaly? like I can put a shower cap or something to stop them from getting wet!
Please help imsadimsadimsadimsad

:sl: sister in regards to washing hair after sexual intercourse then it is sufficient to pour water over your head three times but the water must reach the roots and if they don't then you will have to wash hair properly. If you have finished a period then you should wash the hair properly. Men who have their hair braided must unbraid them and wash hair properly. It is always better to take precaution and wash it properly which will eradicate doubt.

Also avoid using straighteners too much as it can have damaging effects if used long term and cause dead ends. Try using curling cream instead and only shampoo your hair on alternate days.

Also sister relations can take place after Isha which means you can have ghusl when you wake up for Fajr which is quite a big gap or after Fajr and then make Ghusl nearer Dhuhr. In the summer it can take place after Dhuhr as there is a big gap until Asr. However it is recommended that one should not stay in the state of junub for long periouds of time. It is also sunnah to sleep with wudhu.

Sister I think you and your husband should talk about this issue properly because it is not practical to be having relations 3 times a day and especially not in the long term.

Scholars have recommended 3 or 4 times a week and the reason for this is that relations can drain a person and make daily activity harder for them including worship and also because after a long perioud of time it may just become like a routine if it is done too much whereas if it is done less often it becomes more exciting for both husband and wife rather than a daily routine.

Talk things over with one another about this issue and come to a mutual agreement. One should try and be realistic about these things and think about the the long term implications.

and Allah knows best

:wa:

[syilla]

Yup is true ukhtee... is not healthy to do that much. But i guess it depends on individual.

Anyway can i ask you a question but you don't have to answer it? Are you newly wed?

About the hair... If you're not working or going to uni or anything like...then you don't have to worry... You have so much time to take care of your hair after that :)

[S_87]

if you have naturall curly hair then maybe you should try little braids with which can last for long and you can wash your hair without having to worry about the frizz mess after.

and try not to shampoo everyday...

[CosmicPathos]

yea, 4 times per day, especially if continued for years, seems to be suicidal. I mean no offense, but when does the brother work? :p

may Allah (swt) make it easier for you married couple.

[AnonymousPoster]

Are you newly wed?
About the hair... If you're not working or going to uni or anything like...then you don't have to worry... You have so much time to take care of your hair after that :)

yes we are newly weds. And yes I do go to University part time and also take online classes as well, and that is why I don't have so much time for hair. I gotta study. But thanks I have talked to him about the whole issue and he seems to really understand me:statisfie:statisfie :D

[Cabdullahi]

yea, 4 times per day, especially if continued for years, seems to be suicidal. I mean no offense, but when does the brother work? :p

may Allah (swt) make it easier for you married couple.

The brother must be eating some sort of chinese herbs...ginseng maybe? but nonetheless mashallah

[CosmicPathos]

The brother must be eating some sort of chinese herbs...ginseng maybe? but nonetheless mashallah

as they say in Pakistan, he must be having huge jars full of cow's fresh milk 4 times a day. :p mashAllah, nevertheless. :D

[zakirs]

going off topic

:sl:

[crayon]

yes we are newly weds. And yes I do go to University part time and also take online classes as well, and that is why I don't have so much time for hair. I gotta study. But thanks I have talked to him about the whole issue and he seems to really understand me:statisfie:statisfie :D

And with that, I think the thread can be closed? If you'd like to reopen it, please PM a mod. :)

Thread closed.