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AnonymousPoster
02-16-2010, 08:31 PM
Salaam,

I just need some advice and guidence and i hop eim in the right place. to cut the long story shortm, i have previously been involved in pre-marital relationships which didnt work out and literally psychologically damaged me. Anyways last Ramazan i became close to my deen and gained more and more knowledge. I prayed to Allah to help me find a pious religious man. Now i have met a loving, sweet king, honest, faithful man - well so it seems. Hes willing to increase the strength of his deen too. He practices as much as he can.

I learnt my lesson not to fall into the trap of shaytaan again so i told him i want to keep this halaal as possible. His family know about me and he wants me to tell my parents. The problem is i finally find a nice man and im scared about marriage and i dont know thigns dont feel right? Im not very physically attracted to him but all the other qaulities are there.

What should i do?
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AlbanianMuslim
02-17-2010, 12:31 AM
If he is pious, respects your wishes to have a halal relationship and has everything (save for the physical attraction) I say go for it. Physical attraction can happen over time. Sometimes the more you grow to love someone the more attracted you are to them.
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heavenlyspot
02-17-2010, 05:59 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by AnonymousGender
Salaam,

I just need some advice and guidence and i hop eim in the right place. to cut the long story shortm, i have previously been involved in pre-marital relationships which didnt work out and literally psychologically damaged me. Anyways last Ramazan i became close to my deen and gained more and more knowledge. I prayed to Allah to help me find a pious religious man. Now i have met a loving, sweet king, honest, faithful man - well so it seems. Hes willing to increase the strength of his deen too. He practices as much as he can.

I learnt my lesson not to fall into the trap of shaytaan again so i told him i want to keep this halaal as possible. His family know about me and he wants me to tell my parents. The problem is i finally find a nice man and im scared about marriage and i dont know thigns dont feel right? Im not very physically attracted to him but all the other qaulities are there.

What should i do?

If the situation doesn't 'feel' right to you then I don't think you should get married sister.

It wouldn't be fair to him either if he marries a woman who isn't ready but he is.
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CosmicPathos
02-17-2010, 06:08 AM
+ I think you should know what his expectations are. If he is expecting to marry a virgin woman, you must clarify to him that his expectations will not be met. There is no room for deception, if he finds later on that you are no virgin, it will be troubling for both of you.
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AnonymousPoster
02-17-2010, 10:07 AM
Rude remarks removed

I guess the only guidence and advice i need is from Allah, i shall perform dua and istikara.

W Salaam
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